Disclaimer: I do not own Full Metal Alchemist, but enter witty remark here.
Jessie: Okay, so some people wanted me to continue this fic! So here's the next chapter, ya'll! I'm so happy! You guys are so nice! Hands out cookies to reviewers
Joh: Eating an orange
Jessie: I'll start replying to reviews on this chappie, cuz I actually got reviews!
Joh: Finishes Whee!
Jessie: Points at Joh Isn't she funny?
Joh: Blushes Aw, shux, now.
J twins: Huggles
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Ed slowly opened his eyes, and closed them quickly, wishing he hadn't. He tried squinting, allowing his eyes to adjust to the brightness of the room. He felt fingers softly running through his long bangs repetitively. It felt nice.
"Mmm…" he moaned softly, opening his eyes halfway and rubbing them with the back of his hand sleepily. Envy blinked, and stood up from the chair, moving to sit on the bed.
"Chibi, are you okay?" Envy asked, trying not to sound too anxious. Ed slowly moved himself into a sitting position (with assistance from Envy) and looked around.
"…Why is it so damn bright?" Ed demanded weakly. Envy let out a low chuckle.
"We're in the hospital, Edo," he replied softly, his fingers gently caressing Ed's face. Ed blinked, a mix of emotions passing over his face. Shock, anger, confusion, and anxiety were all there. However, confusion overcame them all
"Why?" He asked, his golden eyes focused on the Homunculus in question.
"You passed out," Envy said. Ed's eyes widened.
"I-I did?" Slowly, he began remembering the last things he'd been able to take in. He could just barely hear Envy calling his name, he remembered feeling feverish, and falling.
"I was on the stairs…" Ed said blankly, staring ahead into space as he grasped for the memories. Envy nodded.
"That's right." Ed rubbed his face with his flesh hand.
"Did I hit my head?" he asked.
"Nah, I ran and caught you," Envy said with a smug grin. Ed paused, before pouting.
"I still hate going to the doctor's." Envy shook his head slightly.
"Why do you hate doctors so much, Edo?" Envy asked. The grumble the green-haired male received as a response was so low, he could only make out a few choice phrases, such as "stupid, ugly old men…stick friggin' needles into ya…tell you to drink milk." Envy
Aren't you being a bit stereotypical, Chibi?" He asked, fighting the grin off of his face. Ed's pout deepened.
"I wouldn't be complaining if you hadn't taken me…" he muttered. Envy raised an eyebrow.
"So that's the thanks I get for saving your life?" Ed paused before a slow mischievous smile spread across his face, and he sighed dramatically.
"Ne, I suppose I owe you that week of sex back, now, don't I?" Ed asked, tilting his head, and smiling coyly. Envy licked his lips, and smirked. 'There's the kinda thanks I'm looking for…'
"Yeah, I suppose you do," he murmured huskily, leaning forward to kiss Ed. Just then, a man clad in a lab coat came in. Ed hurriedly pulled away, blushing madly, while Envy merely pouted, sitting back on the bed and crossing his arms in a huff. The doctor surveyed the strange scene for a moment, before curiously checking the clipboard he held. No matter how hard he tried to hide it, it was obvious that Ed was carefully observing the doctor.
The man had sandy colored hair, and green-blue eyes. He couldn't have possibly be older than 25, and right away, Envy could sense that Ed was angry (yet at the same time extremely relieved) about the doctor not being the stereotypical one he described. The doctor lifted his head once more smiling cheerfully.
"It says my patient is "Edward Elric…" So, my patient really is the 'Fullmetal Alchemist,'" The doctor chuckled, looking towards the suspicious looking blonde.
"Yeah, what's it to ya?" Ed snapped, suddenly in a very irritated mood. Envy stifled an exasperated sigh. 'Thus starts the beginning of the mood swings…' Envy shuddered slightly.
"Well, I'm Dr. Setzar, but you can call me Brian; everyone does," Brian replied calmly, approaching the bed Ed was lying on. He studied the clipboard for a moment, before lowering it and grinning at Edward, completely ignoring Edward's glare.
"So, as Mr. Envy here has already told me… Mr. Elric, are you…okay?" Brian blinked, seeing Ed's pallor at the words "Envy" and "already told me."
"Whatever he said…I swear, it's not true," Ed answered weakly. Brian looked at him strangely for a moment, before laughing.
"Mr. Elric--"
"Could ya please just call me "Ed?" It reminds me of someone…" Ed mumbled the last bit, but Brian caught it. Knowing it wasn't the time to press the subject, he committed the strange reaction to memory.
"Right; Ed. It's important that we know if you're…involved with someone," Brian said as casually as he could. If possible, Ed blushed about three times deeper. Envy just gave a lopsided smile.
"Let's see…you've been vomiting, having occasional high temperatures, complaining about aches, and your stomach bothering you," Brian read aloud. He paused, frowning at the next phrase.
"…As well as abnormal mood swings?" Brian asked looking up in confusion at the two. Ed sent a glare at Envy, but Envy merely looked amused at the reaction. Brian's eyes traveled down the clipboard.
"Alright. Now, I'm just going to ask you a few basic questions…but some might be just a bit personal," Brian said.
"But all of your personal information will be kept confidential unless deemed dangerous for your health," Brian added hurriedly as he saw Ed open his mouth to retort. Ed bit his lip, before nodding once in assent.
"How old are you?"
"17." Brian scribbled the answer down.
"Height?"
"…"
"4"11."
"Thank you, Envy." (Scribble).
"…Fuck you," Ed muttered.
"Oh, I couldn't possibly do you now," Envy replied sweetly, thus bringing back Ed's blush full force.
"Ahem," Brian coughed, fighting to maintain a straight face.
"Are you on any medication?"
"No." (Scribble). Brian flipped the front page on his clipboard, and read the next set of questions.
"Now, this is where the questions may be a little personal," Brian announced, smiling reassuringly at Ed.
"Okay…"
"How many times a week would you say you have intercourse?" Ed's jaw actually dropped open, and for a moment he was rendered speechless save a few incoherent splutters.
"You call that a little personal?" Ed shouted, his face beet red. Brian shrugged helplessly.
"I didn't make the questions, and I'm not trying to embarrass you. This is just part of the examination," he explained calmly. Ed dropped his face into his hand, and mumbled something, so that his fingers muffled it.
"Pardon?" Brian asked, leaning down so that Ed could whisper in his ear. Ed repeated himself very softly and quickly, but not too fast so that Brian couldn't decipher his answer. Brian coughed loudly, and blushed slightly despite himself, standing back up straight, and copying down his answer.
"Okay," he announced.
"And have either of you had other partners before?" Brian blinked, proud that he had recovered so quickly. Ed hurriedly shook his head, and tentatively looked up at Envy. Envy slowly shook his head, a small smile playing on his lips.
"Nope. I waited for my alchemist," he grinned. Ed blushed slightly, and looked away so that neither the doctor nor Envy could see his happy smile.
"Now, I just need one more thing, Ed…" Brian started, moving to a table, and after placing the clipboard down, he started collecting a few items. Ed blinked at him, immediately looking suspicious.
"What?" Ed asked slowly. Brian smiled apologetically, lifting a hand to reveal… a small syringe.
"A blood sample." Ed sighed aggrievedly, and sat up straight, offering his left arm.
"If you must," he sighed overdramatically. Envy was lucky enough for Ed not to notice him rolling his eyes at the young blonde's actions.
Brian wiped Ed's wrist with a sanitized cotton swab before he positioned the syringe and deftly slipped the needle in, Edward barely flinching.
Brian quickly withdrew the syringe, blinking at Ed incredulously.
"You're pretty good with needles," he said, sounding slightly impressed. Ed smirked slightly.
"Yeah, yeah, I know," he scoffed. Brian shook his head slightly at the teen, and picked up his clipboard from the desk.
"I'll bring this back from the lab as soon as possible," he grinned, walking out the door. The door shut with finality behind him, and the two beings left in the room quietly watched after the door. There was silence. Ed slowly moved his eyes to Envy. Sensing he was being watched, Envy looked at Ed out of the corner of his eye.
"…Envy?"
"Hmm?"
"…" Ed merely lifted his arms. Not bothering to hide his smile, Envy got up from his chair, and slipped into the small bed with the blonde. Ed moved as close as he could to his emerald-haired lover, and wrapped his arms around his neck. Envy grinned, and took hold of Ed's chin, tilting his head upward and closing the gap between their lips. Ed's eyes slid closed, as did Envy's.
One of Envy's hands subconsciously moved to the back of Edward's head, crushing their lips together hotly. Envy licked at Ed's lips, and was immediately granted entry. Ed shuddered as Envy's tongue explored his mouth professionally.
When Envy remembered his blonde needed to breathe, he broke apart, grinning broadly seeing his chibi panting heavily, slightly breathless himself from the kiss.
Ed leaned against the Homunculus, and tilted his head back so that it rested in the crook of Envy's neck. Envy kissed the top of Ed's head, sighing contentedly. He listened to a long yawn from Ed, and how his breathing eventually became even. He cautiously moved beneath Ed until he got comfortable, and relaxed, letting Ed's body fit into his. It felt so right, the perfect fit of Ed's small frame against his. He slowly let his eyes close.
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Violet eyes quickly opened at the sound of muffled voices. Upon listening more intently, he realized it sounded as though people were arguing about something in hushed whispers outside the door to the room he and a sleeping Edward were in. Even straining to listen, he couldn't hear what the voices were saying. Finally, he saw the doorknob turn, and a very serious Brian strode quickly into the room, closing the door behind him. He slowly turned to face Envy, who was watching him with mild interest, and sighed, raking his fingers through his hair as he made his way over to the bed.
"Mmm? Whasgoin' on?" Ed mumbled sleepily as he woke to the sound of footsteps stopping close to him. He sat up rapidly when he saw that it was Brian, all traces of drowsiness gone.
"Did you find out what's going on? Envy asked. Brian ignored Envy completely, and looked at Ed seriously.
"Ed, how long have these symptoms been going on?" He asked in a rush. Ed frowned slightly.
"I've been throwing up every morning for the past month, but been having stomach pains for longer than that…I've just been feeling very off for a while now," he shrugged. Brian bit his cheek, and scanned over his clipboard. Ed, only just realizing Brian didn't ask his question glared at the doctor immersed in his notes.
"…Well, did you find out what the hell is wrong with me?" He asked impatiently. A faint smile made its way onto Brian lips, and he sighed –seemingly in resignation– putting his hands on his hips and staring at Edward in amusement.
"You alchemist's never cease to amaze me," he chuckled. Ed glowered.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Ed demanded. Envy raised an eyebrow.
"Actually, yeah, what is that supposed to mean?" Envy joined in.
"Have you done any alchemy recently?" Brian asked.
"No, I haven't used any since I started feeling ill?"
"How long ago was the last alchemy you did?"
"Two or three months ago…" Envy could feel Ed tensing as Brian seemed to be relating his illness to alchemy.
"Okay, and have you done any experimental alchemy recently, or been in any tests? Any at all?" Brian asked expectantly. Ed was about to shake his head, but froze.
"Wait…a little bit before I started feeling…weird…I was doing an alchemic experiment," Ed started. Brian looked interested.
"What was it based upon?" Ed frowned, not really seeing much use in asking about his work.
"On creating life…like Human Transmutation without bringing back Homunculus as a result of failure."
"Was it a success?"
"No, it was a failure…Doc, why are you asking me about alchemy? This has nothing to do with trying to figure out what's wrong with me!" Ed exclaimed, beginning to sound exasperated. Brian suddenly looked serious.
"It had absolutely everything to do with what's going on with you, Ed," Brian replied quietly.
Violet eyes suddenly widened. Brian caught this from the corner of his eye, and smiled at the Homunculus.
"It seems your boyfriend has figured it out before you, Ed. He must know your body better than you do," Brian teased playfully, bringing a blush forth from the blonde.
"…You're not serious, right? You're not implying what I think you are?" Envy said slowly. Ed turned his head to gape at Envy, before turning back to the doctor incredulously.
"What are you talking about?" he growled. Brian grinned at Envy's disbelief.
"I kept repeating the test, but it always came up the same; it's in his blood," he directed at Envy, before turning his attention to Ed.
"It's a good thing you're sitting down, or else I'd ask you to sit for this," Brian said softly, reaching a hand forward and griping Ed's shoulder, staring him straight in the eye.
"Ed, you're experiment was a success," he announced as calmly as he could. There was silence. Ed blinked, before all color drained from his face.
"Y-you mean t-to say--" Brian smiled cheerfully.
"Congratulations, Edward and Envy. You're three months pregnant."
The Fullmetal Alchemist, who had attempted a Human Transmutation and survived, who had braved two automail operations at the same time, and who had managed to decipher the history to the Philosopher's Stone…
…Promptly fainted for the second time that day.
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Ed: Reads Aw, c'mon! Why am I the one getting knocked up?
Envy: Glomps Ed Because I get knocked up in the majority of the EnvyxEd fics. Hey, someone's gotta be original.
Jessie: Beams Thank you, Envy! Besides, Ed, you –are– the uke of the relationship.
Joh: Nods Yeah…
Envy CoughFor-oh-so-obvious-reasonsCough
Ed: Blushes
dream-whizper: Oooh, FMA is –so– good! It is really sad at some points, but also really funny! It's really good if you let yourself get into it! Starry-eyed Thanks for the compliments; keep 'em coming! (Lol, jk)
xXxchiixXx: Yup, I'm starting to write FMA! Go me! (Lol) And of course I'll have to keep an eye out for yours!
MiStraLL That's really important for me to hear; thanks a lot!
Kaoru Gal: Hahahaha, I love you, Sis! Glad ya like it so far! Kisses
Me And My God Complex: 1.) Love your username! 2.) Mpregs do rock! Glad you think it's good so far…hope you liked this chappie!
razatip: There's gotta be some relief for Envy! Poor guy, always the one to get knocked up cuz he's more girly or something! Ed's gotta do some of the work, too! Glad you think it's well written!
Firelover666: Of course I'm weird, that's why you love me! Huggles Fluffaluffagus!
Sadistic Sycho: Hope this update was soon enough for you! Lol (No, seriously…)
SexySpoonsWillRuleUsAll: (I laughed so hard when I deciphered your username!) N'ways, totally relieved you thought it was a good idea! Seriously…Envy can't do all the work!
Kakashisninjadogs: Pouts Aww, but the big red buttons are the most fun to push! (Lol, jk) BTW, I dedicate all the yaoi alerts to my dear friend who is an anti-yaoist, and tells me to make big alerts…so yeah. I'm sick of them, but respecting my buddy's wishes. Shrugs Aw, well.
(Please review, because if I get reviews, I know I'm probably doing a good job, so the faster I'll try to update to please you all! Cookies and love to all you nice readers who reviewed the prologue! Be sure to review again! Ta ta for now!)