AN: Hi everyone I just wanted to say that I'll be taking request for this story, so if there is any weird situation you want to see happen in the story just let me know. Also I might not be updating these stories as fast, because I have to write a one act play for school which could take up some time. But don't worry it won't last very long. So I hope you enjoy the story, and don't be afraid to review.

Disclaimer: I own nothing; if I did Ezio and Altair would still have big roles in AC3.

The Beach Incident

Today Altair, Ezio, and Desmond all took a trip to the beach. Altair stayed as far from the water as possible, saying it had nothing to do with not knowing how to swim. Ezio tried skinny dipping, but everyone begged him to keep his clothes on. Meanwhile Desmond was making sandcastles with Leonardo. Right before Desmond could put a mini Assassin's Den flag on it; Cesare came and kicked it down.

"Templars rule!" and he ran away flailing his arms. Desmond and Leonardo looked sadly at their ruined sand castle.

"We shouldn't have to stand for this! Come on Leonardo it's time for revenge!" Desmond pulled Leonardo up to his feet and went to hunt the crazy Templar down. But first Desmond went to talk to Altair about this.

"Hey Altair could you help me and Leonardo get awesome revenge on Cesare?"

"No."

"But why?"

"You see this line," Altair pointed below revealing a line in the sand.

"Yeah."

"I'm not crossing this line."

"Does this have to do with the water?"

"No! Why don't you ask Ezio to help you? He loves being involved in everything."

"I would but Ezio is busy trying to skinny dip."

From afar they saw Ezio on a rock getting ready to get naked, but Mario pushed him in the water before it was too late.

"Go deal with Cesare, I wish you luck. Go before Cesare kicks another castle."

So Desmond left to look for Cesare, finally he found him about to kick Yusuf sand castle. Before Cesare could strike Desmond made a sand ball and threw it at his head.

"That was for my sand castle, and any other castle you destroyed! Everyone rise up against him! Let us all avenge our sandy castles!"

So Leonardo, Claudia, Yusuf, Lucy, Machiavelli, and of course Desmond attacked him with sand balls. Cesare finally ran away screaming, and Desmond was victories! Also Ezio finally got a chance to skinny dip.

The End

Hanging Out With Subject 16 (Umm Clay)

"Do I have to?" Desmond asked Lucy.

"Yes, he needs friends Desmond, please just do it."

Desmond sighed, "Fine, but you own me."

"Don't worry I'll get you three packs of Oreos."

"Yes!"

~At the Villa Auditore~

"You live here?" said Clay.

"Most of the time, sometimes Ezio kicks me out. So I stay with Altair in Masyaf, but he sometimes kicks me out too. When that happens I stay in one of the hideouts."
"Any reason why they would kick you out?"

"I once thought during a full moon that I was trying into a werewolf, I freaked Ezio really bad with that incident. So whenever I do something weird he kicks me out. With Altair I just annoy him sometimes."

Suddenly Clay ran off into the Villa, and started touching paintings.

"Subject 16stop touching that, Ezio doesn't like the paintings being touched!" Clay quickly turned around giving him the look of death.

"That's not my name! IT'S CLAY!" Then he grabbed Desmond by the collar of his hoodie and started shaking him.

"I'm sorry Subject 16!"

"IT'S CLAY!"

Desmond started to cry, "Subject 16!"

"CLAY!"

Then thanks to Clay shaking Desmond a huge painting fell on their heads knocking them unconscious.

~An Hour Later~

"Then he was on fire and- oh my god!" Ezio yelled when he say the unconscious Desmond and Subject 16. Ezio and Altair ran up to them.

"Desmond, wake up. Come on you're not in another coma are you?" Ezio started lightly slapping his face.

"Wake up! You're the only thing that stops Altair from killing me! I mean I'm sorry about the other guy, but I don't really care if his dead. No offense Desmond's friend." Then Desmond twitched.

"He moved!"

"Yup his alive, his always twitching, name a time when he wasn't twitching," said Altair.

"This morning, when he was watching Spongebob."

"Anyway what do we do with his friend? He could be dead for all we know."

"Well here what we do. We both put Subject 16 in an empty room, leave him there for a week, and if his not awake we bury him in the backyard. And no one will ever know," Ezio said.

"I kind of like that plan. What do we do with Desmond?"

"Just leave him there, he'll wake up eventually. Now come help me pick him up."

Then the two assassins grabbed Subject 16, and they heard him say, "Clay." But then they accidently bumped his head to the wall, making him unconscious again.

The End

The Baby

One day Desmond, Ezio, and Altair were walking in the park, and Desmond had a question.

"Where do babies come from?"

Altair and Ezio stopped mid step, and looked at each other.

Altair awkwardly began, "Well, um, you see. When two people um…" Then Ezio butted in.

"You two people to make a baby, not five just two." Ezio turned to face Altair, and put his hands on his shoulders.

"Let's pretend Altair and I are a loving couple," Altair made a vomiting face, "Altair loving couples don't make that face. Ok let's say I'm the dad and Altair is the mom."

"What? No I'm not a female, and I would never be the mother of your child. Ever!"

"Just pretend for Desmond's sake. Now when they really love each other they-"

Suddenly a baby fell from the sky landing in Ezio's arms. Desmond started jumping happily,

"Congratulations you guys! Your parents! Altair you're officially a mom."

"No Desmond I'm not, this is just some random baby."

Ezio in amazement said, "Altair babies don't just fall from the sky. It's out destiny to raise this child."

"No it probably fell out of a plane or something. People misplace their baby all the time nowadays. "

"Everyone knows babies don't fall out of planes Altair," said Desmond.

"Guys we need to take this baby to the police."

"It didn't kill anyone! We can't have it arrested!" replied Desmond. Altair just put his hand on his face.

"How about we take him to the hospital?"

"No! I want to keep him. And I shall name him…. Cheddar," Said Ezio.

"Ezio, this baby isn't a toy! He probably has real parents looking for him."

"But we bonded so much."

"Really? We only had him for two minutes."

"And it has been the most magically two minutes of my life."

Altair rolled his eyes, and grabbed the baby.

"I'm taking him to the police. I'm going whether you like it or not."

"Cheddar nooo! I'll never forget you!"

"They grow up so fast," Desmond said.

The End

Truth or Dare

It was a beautiful rainy day when Ezio called Desmond to come over and play Truth or Dare. Desmond agreed and called Altair.

"This Truth or Dare game sounds ridiculous. I'm not going."

"But it's fun. And you have to go, who will help me tie my shoes?"

"Desmond, seriously? You learned how to do that in the animus two days age."

"Yeah, but the bunny won't go in the hole."

Finally Altair agreed, and went with him.

~At the Villa~

"I want to go first!" Ezio flailed his arms hoping to go first.

"Ok, so this one is for… hmm Altair," Ezio pointed at him.

"Oh no," Altair replied.

"Truth or dare?"

"Neither."

"No pick one." Altair crossed his arms.

"Fine, truth." Ezio snickered evilly.

"Have you ever took all your clothes off when you were alone and started dancing around the room?"

"That's a crazy question!"

"Crazy, but you have to answer it."

Altair's face turned red, "A few times."

Ezio and Desmond busted out laughing.

"Shut up! And if either of you tell anyone I'll hunt you down."

Ezio and Desmond quickly deleted their Facebook statues.

"My turn now. Ezio, truth or dare?"

"Dare, I'm not a scared."

"I dare you to hug Vidic and tell him that his an awesome person, and that you want to be his friend."

Ezio made a horrified face, "Never! I rather die on a bed of needles!"

"You have to do it," Altair said mocking Ezio's voice.

~At Abstergo~

Vidic was having a normal day of being evil until Ezio walked in with a pained looked. He went up to Vidic and gave him a hug that was bone crashing.

"You are awesome, and I want you to be my friend," Ezio said with a forced smile.

"Security!"

~Back at the Villa~

Both Desmond and Altair were laughing at the shamed assassin with his head down. Ezio looked up and glared at Altair who was rolling on the floor.

"Ok relax it wasn't that funny," Ezio said.

"Do you want to know my favorite part? When security came and punched you in the stomach. They will forever be my hero."

"Altair has anyone ever told you that you're an asshole?"

"Yes on several occasions."

"Desmond, truth or dare?" Ezio quickly said hoping to change the subject.

"I'll go with truth to be safe."

"Your never safe with Ezio," muttered Altair.

"Have you ever…. Stalked someone to their house and left a threatening letter at their door."

Desmond looked up trying to remember.

"Once, when Rosa stole my pillow pet, I followed her to her house but I didn't leave a letter. Instead I knocked on her door and when she opened it I ran inside to search the house. Then I ran out with my pillow pet and called it a day."

"What did she do? Asked Ezio.

"Oh she called the cops, but I drop kicked her before she could finish the call. She's all better now, but she doesn't remember what happened."

"All for a pillow pet?" Altair raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah! It was a dragon! So anyway Altair truth or dare?

"Dare. You know I'm actually starting to like this game."

"I dare you to hug Ezio and say his one of your best friends even when he makes you mad."

"Hahaha you're so funny. Now I don't like this game, I'm leaving."

On that note the game ended.

The End (Bye!)