Confessions of the Heart

If Britain Weis didn't model, she could have been an actress. She had perfected the art of acting like nothing was wrong and for the duration of Dave's birthday party, she did just that; she flashed her smile and charmed the guests, and the whole time no one except John, Randy, and Hunter knew that she was dying inside. Even Dave was completely oblivious to her worry; the slight buzz he was enjoying may have played a factor in that.

By the time they made it back to her condo, she had convinced herself that it was business as usual. She would enjoy one more night with him and deal with telling him the truth in the morning. If nothing else, she just wanted one more night in his arms, before he walked away…because they always walked away.

She stood in front of the mirrored wall in her bedroom and removed her jewelry. Looking over at the clock, she counted the amount of hours she had left to be happy. She didn't even notice Dave standing behind her.

"I had a great birthday party." He smiled kissing her neck. "Thank you."

Britain turned to him and smiled back. "You're welcome." She accepted his kisses and felt her heart breaking each time his lips touched hers. She pulled back from him and lowered her eyes. "I'm gonna take a shower."

Dave didn't want her out of his embrace. His arm was still not back to normal, but he was at least at seventy-five percent. He was ready to show her how hard he had been working on recovering...repeatedly. "You want some help with that?"

She touched her hand to his face and laughed. "I think I got this one."

He leaned down and placed a kiss just below her ear. "Don't take too long."

She nodded and started toward the bathroom.

Dave sat on her bed and took off his shirt. With each button he couldn't help but to smile; he hadn't had that much fun in a very long time. Especially with being home for weeks after his surgery, it was good to be around his friends again. And the fact that Britain was the one that went through all of the trouble to throw him a birthday bash just made it that much sweeter. This night was perfect…it couldn't get any better. "Hey, Babe?" Dave spoke loud enough for her to hear him in the bathroom.

She walked toward her bedroom and leaned up against the door, toothbrush in hand. "Yeah?"

"Hunter said you needed to talk to me about something. What's up?"

Britain closed her eyes and held her breath. Damn him… He couldn't even let her do it on her own time; he had to force her into telling him. It was no sense in delaying the inevitable any longer. She sat her toothbrush on the dresser and lifted her chin as she made her way to sit next to him.

Dave noticed the look on her face right away. "What's wrong?"

Britain looked up at the ceiling and shook her head. She didn't want to tell him but she had no choice. "I don't think we should see each other anymore." She lied because it was easier than telling him the truth.

"What?!?" He was expecting her to say that she didn't want to go to his mom's for Easter or she really couldn't stand hanging out with his friends. Never once did the thought of them breaking up cross his mind.

She didn't want a confrontation. Just once she wanted him to except what she was saying and not try to read anymore into it. "Hunter doesn't like me and he doesn't want me to see you." She kept her voice low and even, like a child defending their position to a parent that they didn't want to disappoint.

"I don't give a fuck what Hunter wants!" Dave was bordering between confusion and anger at that exact moment. "Since when does Hunter have a say in what goes on with you and me?"

Damn it…just leave it alone. There was no way around it. She took a deep breath and looked him in the eye. "I did something a few years ago and Hunter found out about it. He's right. We shouldn't be seeing each other."

Dave stared through her. "Well…"

Why was he going to make her say it? All he had to do was walk away. "Your gonna make me tell you, aren't you?"

"Yeah. I need to know the reason that you're ripping my fucking heart out right now." He didn't care if he sounded cold, she was killing him. He had such a perfect day with her. Where the hell did this secret past come from? What could have possibly been so bad that it was going to end their relationship?

The easiest way to say it was not to name names. "Look…a few years ago, I use to date this guy that worked for WCW. Everybody told me that he was a bastard, but I didn't listen. We were at this party because his friend just got pushed for the championship." Although all the details of that night were sketchy, she remembered the party and the way Steiner's house was decorated with streamers and a big banner hanging over the front door. "We were having a great time and I was bombed out of my fucking mind. He started kissing me and whispering to me…and I told him we couldn't because of all the people in the house. He told me not to worry about it because everybody was doing their own thing...they wouldn't even notice. I don't think I thought about it…I just said what the hell. I kinda liked the idea that people may be watching us." When she was younger, Britain was fearless. She was Britain Weis, up and coming model. Her face was all over magazines, everyone from Tommy Hilfiger to Fendi wanted her to be their girl. She was dating Marcus Bagwell, one of the hottest guys in the WCW. What did she have to lose?

Britain refused to cry, it wasn't something she was sad about, but the fear of how Dave would react made eyes start to burn. "He fucked me on a pool table in front of the entire party; his friends, his co-workers…everybody. People were cheering and telling him what to do to me and throwing down money to place bets on if I would let him do it." She remembered the song that was playing on the radio and the cat calls from the spectators. "It also happened to be his friend's birthday and my boyfriend told me that he wanted to give me as a present. He told me that he would be right there the whole time to make sure nothing crazy went down and that I would make his friend really happy." Britain had always had a little crush on Lex Luger. Ever since she was a little girl, she always thought he had an amazing body. "I figured why not…he was hot. So after him, it was the guy whose party it was. I noticed that there was a line forming behind him and the whole time my boyfriend was right there, encouraging me." She could remember Luger and Steiner but after that it got fuzzy. "I don't even remember how many guys I did…all I knew was, I having the time of my life.

The next thing I remember is Ric Flair putting his coat around me and me telling him that I didn't want to leave. I remember throwing up in his car and him taking me to Jericho's hotel room." Jericho was so shocked when Ric told him what went down, but he wouldn't take that out on Britain. She couldn't even remember her name she was so drunk; he had even contemplated taking her to the hospital for alcohol poisoning. He didn't hold her accountable for her actions that night, he couldn't. "Jericho told me that I had to get away from the guy I was dating. He made me promise to leave him alone." If only she would have listened to Jericho things would never had played out the way they did. "My boyfriend came around two days later to find me…he cared that much about me that it took him two whole days to realize that I was gone. He told me that he was sorry and he was drunk and that none of that should have happened. He asked me to forgive him…then he told me he loved me. And like a dummy, I believed him and I left with him." Had she done as Jericho asked and never gone back to Bagwell, things in their relationship wouldn't have spiraled out of control and all of the subsequent events of that relationship, that was doomed from the start, could have been avoided. If Dave wanted stories of how shitty her relationships had been, she had plenty of Bagwell stories to tell.

Dave sat there quietly listening to the story trying to figure out who that Britain was. His Britain wasn't anything like that girl.

This was the part of the story that she didn't like to think about. She could handle what she did, not how people reacted. "A few days later I went backstage at one of their shows and I noticed the stares and I heard the whispers and them laughing at me. They started calling me Eightball because of the pool table. And I had guys coming up to me, throwing down money betting each other what they could make me do…right in front of me. Apparently someone videotaped it and I was the highlight reel in the locker-room. Jericho and Eddie got the tape and destroyed it, but it didn't stop the talk. I had become the company whore. Even people who weren't there were saying things about me. I didn't understand why they were acting like that; we all had a good time. I wasn't ashamed of what I did until Rey, who was one of my best friends, told me that I was a whore."

"Britain…"

She put her hand on his chest to stop him from talking. "You're getting a shot at being the champion. You're going to hold the company on your shoulders. People are gonna pay to see you. You don't need the whispers when you walk down the hall. Every time you see those guys that came over, you're gonna wonder. And I can't tell you for sure how many of your friends and co-workers, I've been with or what we did. I don't remember."

"And Hunter's been blackmailing you with this?" Dave's anger shifted from Britain's ex-boyfriend to Hunter. Never once was he angry with her.

She nodded. "As much as I hate to admit it, he's right. This thing with us can't work because I still don't see where I did anything wrong. I was having fun and I don't regret one second of it. Is that the type of person you want around your kids?"

His silence told her everything. She had hoped that by some miracle he would tell her he understood or that everything was fine. But she knew the truth, it couldn't last. The first tear slowly rolled down her face when she realized what she had to do. "I'm going to save myself the pain and embarrassment of having you walk out on me and I'm just going to ask you to leave."

Dave couldn't understand what she was talking about. Didn't them being in love count for anything? He didn't say anything instead he shook his head in disbelief.

"Please...just go." She touched his cheek and smiled at him. "It's over."

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Britain stood in her kitchen letting the tears roll silently. She was angry with herself because she had to end things. She was angry with herself because she still didn't feel any remorse for her poor judgment. And most of all, she was angry that she let Hunter for ruin the best thing that ever happened to her.

She heard her door open and she rapidly wiped her eyes. She knew X would be coming in whenever the hell she wanted to. After Dave's party, X decided to go to a few clubs with some of their old friends. She didn't want X to see her cry over a guy, not again.

"Hey…" X said walking over to the fridge. "So…you know that guy John, Dave's friend? I could fuck him. He's hot."

Britain smiled but still didn't turn around. "Yeah…he is."

"Why are you still up? I thought for sure you and Dave would've brought out the whips and chains by now." She grabbed a bottle of water and hopped up on the counter.

"He's gone."

"Gone where?"

Britain turned around to face her best friend. "I told him…it's over."

X couldn't believe it. Dave made Britain happy. Although she wouldn't admit it, she was happy that Britain was happy. How dare he walk out on her? "Are you okay?"

Britain nodded. "It was for the best, anyway." If she talked about it anymore, she was going to cry. "I'm going to bed. Goodnight."

X watched Britain walk up the hall and into her room. She knew that if Britain didn't fall apart already, it was only a matter of time. And when she did, she would be there for her, just like always. "Goodnight."

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Dave Batista stormed through the Hilton hotel on a mission. He was going to find Hunter and rip his fucking head off. As soon as he got off the elevator he noticed Randy standing in the hallway.

Randy's smile faded as soon as he noticed the pissed look on Dave's face. "Hey bro…what are you doing here?"

Dave walked right past him and continued toward Hunter's room.

Randy ran in the opposite direction to get John and Ric. Before he even get the door open to John's room, he had ready started explaining the situation. "Dave's gonna kill Hunt…" He ran back down the hall to get Ric. If anyone could stop Dave it was Ric.

Dave didn't knock, he didn't think to. Instead he kicked the door open. "What the fuck is your problem?" He yelled at Hunter as he continued to charge toward him. "You been holding this shit over her head? How long have you known? How long have you been making her feel like shit?"

Hunter was not expecting that reaction from Dave. In his mind, Britain was a good time girl; she was just something to do when Dave got bored. "Man, that bitch ain't worth this." Hunter held on to Dave's hands which were firmly gripping the collar of his shirt. "I was protecting my investment."

"I'm not your fucking investment! I'm your friend!" Dave let Hunter go and looked at him like he didn't know who he was. "Do you have any idea what you did? I'm in love with her and she thinks that if she's with me, she's jeopardizing my career!"

"Dave…calm down!" Ric yelled behind him to get his attention.

"And you…you knew?" He turned and glared at Ric. "Did you know too?" He directed his attention to both John and Randy. "Everybody fucking knew and no one decided to clue me in? Were you all in agreement with this asshole? Did anybody give a fuck how I might feel about it?"

"It's for your own good. She was gonna bring you down. You got to much riding on you to deal with her and her shit."

"Fuck you. Don't tell me what the fuck I have to deal with." Dave turned his dark glare back to the man that started it all. "You stay the fuck away from me and Britain."

Hunter looked at his friend confused. He was only trying to save him from getting hurt. Dave had no right to turn on him. "I was looking out for you. What happened to bros before hos?"

"You ain't my bro, not anymore…fuck you."

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Britain laid in her bed in the dark thinking about how fast everything fell apart. She should have known that she couldn't be happy with Dave. Guys like him didn't happen to her. She had never met someone that treated her like she was important. Dave was the only man besides her father that made her feel special. But now that was gone and it was nothing she could do to stop that.

She looked at his shirt, still where he'd left it, and she let her hands run over the silky material. She smiled thinking about how good he looked wearing it, the way he didn't button the first two buttons and how his massive chest and wife-beater peeked out from underneath of it. She could still hear her girlfriends commenting on how handsome he was and she could still see that smile on his face when he kissed her after they sang happy birthday to him.

Britain brought the shirt up to her nose and smelled his cologne. That's when it really hit her…he was gone and he wasn't coming back. She let all of the tears and sadness come out as she clung to his shirt, holding it under her cheek. She knew it would hurt, but she didn't think it would hurt like this.

X had changed into boxers and a t-shirt before she went to check on Britain. She tapped softly on her door and opened it when she didn't get a response. She heard soft whimpers, but she couldn't see her in the dark. "Brit…"

Britain sniffled and turned her head toward the sound of X's voice. "Yeah?"

"You okay?"

It was no use in hiding it, she was falling apart. "No..." She tried to catch her breath but it only made her cry harder.

"Oh, Britain…" X walked across the room and climbed in the bed beside her. "Come here." She watched as Britain turned around to face her and her heart broke for her. Her face was covered in tears and she looked like her world was ending. Christina wrapped her arms around Britain and held on to her as she cried.

"I love him."

"I know you do, mija."

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"You have gotta be the dumbest fuckin' asshole I ever met." John Cena was pissed. It was one thing for Hunter to fuck up, but for Dave to do it? That was just beyond the realm of reason. "B is fuckin' in to you…what the fuck did you leave for?"

Dave was sick of listening to John yell at him. "She told me to leave! What the fuck was I supposed to do?"

"Whatever the fuck it takes!" John Cena had never been in love; that wasn't his thing. But he knew what it looked like when he saw it. "I ain't never seen you act the way you act around her. B fucking makes you happy…and you keep a smile on her face. And you let fucking Hunter end that shit? What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"She made a mistake. It's not like you haven't." Ric's face was turning beet red as he sat in the room glaring at Dave. "I was there…I saw what happened. That girl was so drunk she didn't know her name, let alone what was going on and they all knew it. I don't even think she knows half of the shit that went on. It was fucked up, but I don't blame her for it and neither should you."

Dave tried to open his mouth, but Randy's voice silenced him. "Bro…I don't like to get in your business but this chick has everything. She's funny, she's hot, she puts up with your ass…what the fuck else she gotta do for you, huh? So what, she fucked a couple of guys…it ain't no worse than some of the shit we pulled off together."

"You know what, fuck this! You gonna act like you're too good for her, give me her fucking number. I'll take up the fucking slack…dumb motherfucker." John stormed out the room and slammed the door behind him. He couldn't quite figure out why he was so upset, but he really liked Britain and she didn't deserve what Hunter or Dave did to her.

Dave sat there looking at Ric and Randy trying to figure out how he could fix this. For all he knew, he had probably lost his job and he was still out with an injury and he had lost the respect of his friends. But none of that mattered because the only thing he could think about was the fact that he had lost the love of his life.

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X woke up to the sound of the doorbell. She looked over at Britain who was finally asleep, still wrapped in her arms. She tried to ignore the ringing, she knew who it was, but he wouldn't stop. Quietly she got out of the bed and padded through Britain's condo to answer the door. She didn't look through the peep hole or bother to ask who was there, instead she swung the door wide open, placed her hand on her hip, leaned her weight on one leg, knitted her brow and sucked her teeth. "What the fuck do you want?"

Dave should have expected that Britain's bulldog was there to protect her. If he actually wanted to make it in the door, he had to be calm. "I need to talk to her."

"No."

Dave sighed. He didn't want to fight with X at 4:30 in the morning. "Please? I need to talk to her." He kept his voice as calm and monotoned as it had been the first time.

X stood to the side to let him in, but she grabbed his arm before he could walk any further into the house. "You got a lot of fucking nerve showing up here. You walked out on her..."

Why was everyone blaming him for walking out? He didn't walk out. "She put me out!"

"You didn't have to leave! You were supposed to stay and fight. You were supposed to tell her that she worth whatever the fuck you gotta go through to be with her. She's a fucking mess right now. Do you know how hard it is for her to trust men? She left herself open and you managed to shit all over her." X had been polite and friendly to Dave every time she had seen him. But that was before he had hurt her best friend. Now all bets were off.

Dave had just about enough of everyone blaming him. He came back to set it straight, but no one wanted to give him credit for that. "How the fuck do you think I feel? She told me she didn't want to see me anymore. She didn't give me a fucking chance."

"So what? If you always had people take what they want and then throw you away, would you really stop to think that maybe this one wants to stay and fight it out?"

Dave hung his head defeated. There was nothing he could say to make Christina understand. "Can I please talk to her?"

X narrowed her eyes and sized him up. "I'm gonna tell you like this. If you hurt her or make her cry again, I swear on all that is Holy that I will stomp a mudhole in your ass."

With an annoyed nod, Dave turned and headed toward Britain's bedroom. He walked in the quiet room and made his way over to the small lamp on her nightstand. Turning it on, he looked over at her sleeping, still holding on to his shirt. Her face was puffy and from the amount of tissues on the bed and in the trash can, she had really taken their breakup hard.

Britain felt a tickle on her nose that started between her eyes and down to the tip and then slowly back up. She knew that tickle, but she refused to believe it. Dave was gone, he wasn't coming back, but when her eyes opened with a flutter and there he was.

"We need to talk." His voice was quiet and his face was somber. He wasn't quite sure what he was going to say, but whatever it was, it was going to be from his heart.

It would have been easier to get over him, if he wasn't there. All she needed was two weeks to get him out of her system. Did he just come to twist the knife? "Why are you here?"

"Because you're here." Dave knelt beside her bed and noticed how she never lifted her head off the pillow. "You broke my heart tonight and somehow you're okay with that." He took a deep breath and decided to lay it all out for her. "It took me 36 years to fall in love and I'll be damned if Hunter or anybody else is gonna take that away from me."

"You don't understand." She was doing this for his own good. "You can't handle a scandal, Dave. You don't need it. You're gonna be the champ…"

"Fuck that. You think a fucking belt is more important to me than you?" Why was this so hard for her to understand? He was in love with her, what else mattered besides that? "My career means a lot to me, but you mean more. I love you."

"You can't. You have kids and this moral code that you live by. I don't fit into that, Dave."

He shook his head in disbelief. "I don't know why you think I'm some choir boy, but that damn sure isn't me." He needed her to see that he was human and just a flawed as she was. "After my second divorce, me and Orton started hanging out a lot because he was convinced that I needed to start dating again. We were in Toronto at this bar and this group of girls came up to us. One of them slipped Orton her room key and said that she wanted both of us to come up to her room. When we got there we were outnumbered. It was like eight of them and just us two. I was the one that had the brilliant idea to call some more guys to come over." He looked at Britain and shrugged. "That was my first orgy, and it damn sure wasn't my last. I didn't care anything about any of those girls. I didn't ask any of them their names or ages. I didn't give a fuck. But that didn't stop me from asking each and every one of them to blow me or fucking them in the ass."

"Why are you telling me this?"

If she didn't understand by now, it was truly a lost cause. "Because we all have a past and we all make stupid mistakes. I don't care how many guys you've been with, I don't care if they whisper behind my back. What I care about is that when I come home, I'm coming home to you."

She wanted to believe him, but she didn't want to get her hopes up. "What about Hunter?"

"Fuck Hunter. I already talked to Vince. When I come back, I'm going to Smackdown. I don't think I can work with him…not right now anyway." Dave told Vince the whole story and he was surprised at how easily he went along with it.

"And your push?"

He smiled. She was still trying to take care of him. "I'm taking the belt over with me." He noticed the silent tears rolling down her face and reached over to wipe them away. "You need to come up with better excuses than that for why we can't be together. Otherwise, you need to move over because I'm tired and I want to go to sleep with you in my arms." Dave Batista didn't cry, but he could feel his eyes clouding with tears.

"Are you sure?" She was almost afraid to ask.

He nodded and stood. He took off his pants and his t-shirt and pulled back the covers on her bed. He watched as Britain rolled over to make room for him and when he laid down and felt her head touch his chest and her arms come around him all he could do was hold her and kiss her head.

"I love you, Dave." This was the first time she had said it out loud. When she told him that one time before, she had whispered it in hopes that he didn't hear her. She had told everyone else how she felt about him, but she hadn't told him that again since that night.

Dave smiled and held her tighter. "Say that again."

"I love you."

"One more time." He looked down at her face and laughed. "I like the way it sounds."

"I …love… you."

He leaned down to taste her lips and sighed contently. "I love you too, Britain."