I do not own the Justice League.

Reality Bites

Louie, the aspiring chef, was left behind to guard the girl and boy. According to his boss, Stuart, there were fewer things he could screw up as a guard than as a fighter. Stuart had even been nice enough (Louie was smart enough to realize it wasn't on purpose) to leave him with his new friend, Jimmy.

Guarding kidnapped victims wasn't something that Louie was fond of, but figured it was better than killing superheroes. He may have not gone to church in years, but he was pretty sure that there was a special place in Hell for people who did that; it was probably the equivalent of killing a saint.

Jimmy distracted Louie from these thoughts by playing poker with him. While he was being dealt, Louie kept sneaking glances at the victims who were laying on the floor in the corner. The girl he knew from earlier. Actually knew was exaggerating it, more like briefly acquainted. She kept glaring at him and it was starting to give him the heebie jeebies; he wouldn't be surprised if she was casting some kind of curse on him. Maybe after this job Louie would see about going back to church.

The guy though, was rather calm and accepting of his fate. There had been that one incident earlier where he demanded to know where the girl went, but duct-taped had solved that problem. After Stuart had left, Jimmy did remove the duct-tape from his mouth, so he could talk to the girl. They weren't going anywhere, and Louie secretly hoped if the boy could talk to the girl, maybe she would stop glaring at them. She didn't.

There was their weird conversation earlier about it 'going both ways'. Louie nor Jimmy understood what that meant, but as long as the boy and girl behaved, they didn't care.

A polite knock on the door soon interrupted the card game. Jimmy and Louie looked at each other for a couple seconds, while trying to figure out what they should do. Eventually they both got up and went to the door. Looking through the peep-hole, Louie saw two of the most beautiful girls he had ever seen in his life. Granted he didn't spend a lot of time around beautiful women, but he was willing to bet that these two had to be the most beautiful ones out there.

The one on the right had long curls of ebony hair, with deep violet pools for eyes and the cutest button nose. The one on the left had luxuriously soft caramel hair with sparkling sapphire orbs, and the longest eyelashes Louie had ever seen. So obsessed with wondering which one he might end up with (and hoping for both), Louie didn't notice Jimmy shoving him to the side to look through the peep-hole. He didn't notice Jimmy opening the door to greet the two girls.

Louie went from daydreaming about a future in a little house in the suburbs with 2.5 kids, to gazing into sapphire orbs. Deep blue pools that sucked him in, and once again he was lost in his daydreams. Once again he was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't notice what was going on around him. Like Jimmy who was drooling just as bad as Louie over the girls. Or the girl with the sapphire orbs swinging her fist to knock him out.

It was rather unfortunate for Jimmy and Louie that they didn't know about the power of Sues.

Suzy's POV

"Stop flirting with them, they're Sues!" I hissed at Gardner.

Annie had sent them, figuring with their combined Sueness, the first hotel room they checked would have me and Gardner in it; something about how things are always convenient for Sues. Both had only been at her camp for two months, so they still had plenty of Sueness, but were some what normal. Unfortuantely, they were still Sue enough to attract any and all guys to them like moths to a flame.

Gardner gave me a dopey looking grin. "Pssh, I think somebody's just jealous."

Me, jealous? As if. Why would I be jealous of a couple air-brained Sues? More importantly, why would I be jealous of them hanging on Gardner's arm? I didn't care about who he hung out with. If he wanted to lose whatever brain cells he had left by flirting with them, he could go ahead.

The first thing they did upon entering the room, was knock out the guards. Then, they proceeded to introduce themselves and explain that they were there to save us. I stopped caring once they mentioned they were from Annie's camp. While a summer spent with Sues had made me more tolerant of Sues, I wasn't in the best mood due to everything that happened and my patience was quickly wearing thin.

I crossed my arms and glared at them. "I'm not jealous of Flamingo and Crystal Light here."

"It's Raven and Chrysanthemum," said the one on the left. Her lower lip began to tremble and tears threatened to spill over; she was upset that I didn't want to be her friend. She'd get over it just like all the other Sues did. Besides, I liked the names I came up for them better.

"And you are sooooooooooo jealous right now~" said the one on the right. "Poor Gardner, it must have been so hard dealing with her."

"Yeah," agreed the other as she ruffled his hair. "She just doesn't appreciate your brilliance."

His brilliance? What brilliance would be that be exactly? Gardner just nodded his head, too infatuated to actually say anything. Moronic jerk.

I took a deep breath and reminded myself that I still needed them to get to the battle in time to help. According to the news, persons unknown were making a path to the Hall, and so far the League was useless. If I wanted to get across the country in time to stop Stuart, I would need their Sueness.

"Fine, go ahead and waste your time giggling like morons. Just remember how Angela would react if you brought them home."

Gardner's head snapped up at that comment. Angela would be unable to stand them. They were prettier than her for starters, but were constantly giggling and super annoying. And knowing her, a slap just wouldn't be satisfying enough. If he could bring up Angela's anger so I would save his life, I could bring up her anger to get rid of the Sues.

"I hate you," he growled and moved out of the Sues embrace. I smiled; he knew I was right, and I loved every minute of it.

"What should we do with them?" asked Crystal Light. She was referring to our former guards who were currently knocked out on the ground.

Deciding that I could only stand one Sue at the moment, I said, "Stay here and guard them till the League arrives, while we go to the Hall."

Her lower lip started to tremble again. "You want me to guard them? But I'm a hero!"

Ah, the save-the-day complex. Used to Annie and her tantrums, I actually knew the right thing to say for once. "You have to start with the small stuff before you get to do the big stuff."

She thought over what I was saying. "But, how come she gets to go? I've been at camp way longer than she has," she cutely cried.

Ugh. Dealing with one Sue was simpler than dealing with two. "Are you questioning my orders? Do I have to tell Annie that one of her Sues is going against orders?"

It wasn't uncommon for Sues to have a nature that caused them to break rules in order to receive glory. Annie and I quashed this nature when Sues first enter camp, by telling them a story about a former Sue who thought she could save the world and went against the rules, too. She got smushed like a bug by some guy who was ten times her size and we don't remember her name, at all. Just that she went against orders. It's completely bull, but at the point they hear the story, they're still naive enough to think we wouldn't lie to them. By the time they're smart enough to realize that we lied, they've also realized how dumb they were as Sues and why we did it. I'm not going to lie, telling them the story and seeing the look of horror on their faces as they realize nobody remembers her, is my favorite part.

The little Sue nods her head and agrees to what I've said and vows to protect the guards with all she has. I assure her that I have faith in (really, I doubt the guards would even be coherent enough to escape with her in the room). I then tell Gardner to shut his mouth.

The other Sue says that she can teleport us to the battle. After a couple failed attempts, Gardner and I realize the reason behind the failures.

All I can say is, reality is a bitch.

Gardner's POV

For the record, I wasn't drooling. And Suzy was soooooo jealous. Just saying.

But as she said, the Reality Effect was cancelling out the Sue's powers, leaving us stranded in the hotel room. Much to Suzy's annoyance, I insisted upon not being left behind. I may not have been any use in a battle, but Stuart had the one thing that could get me home. Knowing Suzy, she would do something moronic and the device would end up getting lost or destroyed. However, if I was there while she was doing the something moronic, perhaps I could manage to get close enough to Stuart, to get the device before it was lost or destroyed.

Oh, and Suzy had been exaggerating earlier about Stuart being half way across the country. Technically, he hadn't even made it an hour away from Central City, which gave us plenty of time to catch up with him by using car. Tanks don't move that fast, especially when they're in the middle of a battle. Stuart had been so busy with imagining his triumph, he didn't stop to think of what it took to transport all his weapons across the country. Why he didn't use the device to get to the Hall, I don't know. Then again, I didn't understand his reasoning for the plan in the first place, so what did I know?

It hadn't been hard to find Stuart given the trail of destruction he left behind. Before we left the hotel, Suzy had ordered Raven to search the guard's pockets in hopes that she would discover keys to a vehicle that would conveniently be outside. Her Sueness paid off since there was a fully gassed SUV located right outside that the key fit perfectly in.

As we had discovered when Raven and Chrysanthemum arrived at the hotel, Suzy's insane plan had worked. She got through to her author, who called Lucy, who got through to Annie, who contacted the League. While the League had quickly discovered that their powers were useless against Stuart's weapons, they didn't really understand why. But once Annie told them about the Reality Effect, they switched tactics and started to use 'old technology'. What was old for them, was still standard in my world.

Not that it appeared to be working that well.

Like Suzy said, reality can be a real bitch.

**Author's Note**

I would like to thank Loki's Son and AidenSurvival for reviews.

I can't believe it, but there's only 2-3 chapters left of this story before it'll be over. Next chapter will have Suzy and Gardner dealing with Stuart.

Thanks for reading, and if you can leave a review!