Chapter 3: Maybe
Maybe it's time to change,
and leave it all behind,
I've never been one to walk alone,
Always been scared to try,
So why does it feel so wrong,
To reach for something more,
To want to live a better life,
What am I waiting for?
Coz nothing stays the same,
Maybe it's time to change.
Sick puppies - Maybe
It had been three months.
Three months since his conversation with Sasuke in the locker room, and since then neither Naruto nor Sasuke even glanced in his direction. He almost refused to go to school countless times, but he realized that if he did this, he would lose. If he completely gave up on everything, it would mean Sasuke had won, and he wouldn't allow that, no matter what. He had always relied on Naruto to protect his happiness, to be there when his life just got too hard, but now he had lost his sunlight to the damn raven.
Gaara was selfish, and he knew that much. To think that Naruto had a new best friend irked him to no end, but he didn't want to ruin his former best friend's happiness, and so he just sat back and observed both boys actions, secretly of course. It didn't take Gaara long to completely and totally resent everything that was Sasuke Uchiha.
He was spoilt, arrogant, and thought himself to be better than the rest of the world, and it took every ounce of Gaara's will power not to storm over and knock the raven down a few notches.
"Hey Gaara, hm" A boy with long blond hair, half of it tied up into a ponytail approached Gaara, and the redhead studied the blond intently. He had bright sapphire blue eyes, and his long side fringe covered his left eye. He had a fairly muscular shape, and was obviously very much taller than Gaara himself. The boy was wearing black jeans and a black t-shirt with a red cloud on it.
"Hn," Gaara eyed the blond suspiciously as he took a seat next to him. He knew this boy was Deidara, and he knew that he was with the Akatsuki group. A gang of bullies that liked to hassle all of the other students. He knew this because he was one of the people forces to contribute to their 'hobby'. He also knew that Sasuke's older brother, Itachi Uchiha had joined their ranks, because he was the first person the Uchiha went for. Gaara knew he was a great fighter, but he has never been able to fend them off, especially when they attacked in two's all the time.
"My name's Deidara, but then again you probably knew that right, hm?" Deidara smiled at Gaara as he spoke, but the redhead didn't respond, instead he continued staring at Deidara, unsure of what his motives were. "Look, I know I haven't exactly been friendly to you in the past, but I want to make it up to you, seriously, I just want to make amends, hm" Deidara's speech impediment was really beginning to get on his nerves.
"I do not trust you, nor will I ever trust you," Gaara stood to leave, but was stopped by Deidara's arm on his wrist, and Gaara knew Deidara could feel the welts on his skin, from the excessive amount of self harming he did the past few months.
"Gaara, are you okay?" The blond turned his wrist over gently so he could see the numerous cuts littering the redheads arm. It was obvious Gaara didn't care if he cut an artery and died, in fact, Deidara guessed, that was probably what he wanted.
"I am fine," Gaara snarled in response, snatching his arm back and storming off. He was so angry he didn't notice the raven's onyx eyes watching him enter the deserted boys bathroom, and he also didn't notice that same raven stand and follow the redhead, leaving his friends behind.
The moment Gaara entered the bathroom, he made quick work in extracting the razor blade from his pocket, and sliding it slowly across the skin on his left wrist, watching the essence of his life slowly seeping out. He didn't even bother trying to hide his wrist when he heard someone enter the bathroom from behind him. He knew no one cared if he lived or died. What he didn't expect though, was for someone to carefully force him to turn around, and wrap his wrist in a bandage that the other boy pulled from his bag. However, what startled Gaara the most, was when he looked up, the first thing he saw was onyx eyes staring down at him.
When Sasuke had finished wrapping the smaller boys wrist, he didn't dish out pointless questions like Gaara expected, in fact, he didn't even say anything. All he did was look down at Gaara, face completely blank, except for a small glimmer of emotion in his eyes that Gaara couldn't recognise.
"Why did you follow me?" Gaara finally voiced his curiosity, turning an accusing glare on the Uchiha.
"I was concerned, and so I came to make sure you're okay," The redhead knew Sasuke wasn't lying, however, he didn't want to believe what the Uchiha said was true.
"Well don't bother, I'm fine, now why don't you just go run along back to Naruto," Gaara sneered, his voice full of hostility towards the raven.
"Why do you hate me so much, Gaara?" Sasuke questioned, still hiding his emotions from the redhead.
"Because you stole from me the only friend I ever had, the only person who was always there for me, and the only person I ever truly cared about. You stole Naruto from me, and for that I will never forgive you," They were the most words Gaara had ever spoken to the raven, and they were spoken completely out of anger. If Gaara was his usual calm self, he never would have voices any of the words that had just come out of his mouth.
"I never stole anything from you Gaara. You are more than welcome to join us. Naruto has just taken me in as his new best friend, I didn't ask for it. It was his choice, so if you are going to blame anyone, blame him," Sasuke explained to Gaara slowly, his voice never wavering in the slightest.
Gaara's immediate reaction was to leave the bathroom. He wanted nothing more than to beat the life out of the tall Uchiha boy, however, he knew that was not a possibility. Instead, he sat down in his usual spot, glad to see Deidara had left, and he thought about his options.
He didn't need to get through everything on his own since before he met Naruto, and he decided it was time for him to stand on his own once again. He had to rid himself of everything that made him Gaara. He had to change himself and leave everything else behind him. He needed to close off everything, so no one would ever get as close to him as the blond boy had, because he knew, no matter what, it would always, ALWAYS end in betrayal.
Change had never come easily to Gaara, and it probably never would. He had absolutely no idea where to start with his new persona, and what he should change first. It was all very new to him, and as he was sitting there, his head was absolutely full of thoughts. Thought on how he could change his personality, thoughts on how he could change his looks, and mainly, thoughts on how Sasuke and Naruto would react to this new Gaara.
He knew it wouldn't be a pleasant reaction, that is, if they noticed at all, and he doubted they would. Why would they when they never noticed anything about him before? He went missing for weeks, and neither of them noticed, so why would something like this make them cast aside their ignorance and actually notice him? No. He doubted they would notice. After all, he was just Gaara. No one special.
It was with those thought in mind he approached the Akatsuki gang, a look of absolute resolve on his face. He stood there for a few moments, just assessing the people there. There was a tall, blue haired man with a tall, muscular build, and a rugged frame, standing with a boy who looked like an older, more feminine Sasuke, except his hair was a pure black colour, and was longer, tied in a pony tail at the base of his neck. Is main noticeable feature, however, were the lines that ran along the edge of his cheek, down the sides of his nose. He knew the larger male was Kisame, and the other boy was Itachi Uchiha. Sasuke's older brother.
The next pair he noticed was Hidan, a thin, foul mouthed boy with naturally white hair and bright violet eyes, and Kakuzu, a highly tanned boy with brown hair and bright, slightly scary looking green eyes. However, the most noticeable feature he had was the Chelsea smile he had, that was littered with stitches.
His eyes continued roaming the group, next landing on a creepy boy with tree-green hair, and a fascination with painting one half of his face white. Gaara knew this boy went by the name of Zetsu, a tall boy with multi personality disorder. He noticed him being annoyed by a short boy with spiked black hair, and an orange swirled mask in place on his face, covering his left eye. Gaara identified this boy as Tobi, a sixteen year old boy with the mind of a seven year old.
Next he spotted Deidara talking to boy that looked almost identical to Gaara, except he didn't have excessive bags under his eyes, and his eyes were an ash rose colour, also he was taller than Gaara. This boy was Gaara's older cousin, Sasori.
Gaara cautiously approached his cousin and Deidara. He waited for them to notice him before he spoke, in a quiet yet confidant voice.
"I wish to join the Akatsuki,"
AN: well there you have it! The next chapter of Never Again! I know it's kind of a fail chapter, but I did my best. Had a massive case of writers block while was writing this chapter, so yeah, sorry :) but I did my best!
R&R!