Title: Little Red Riding Hood

Author: Enaty

Rating: T

Disclaimer: Both fairy tales.

Claimer: All nonsense is mine.

Author's Notes: I wonder when I'll be through with all the Brothers Grimm fairy tales...

Little Red Riding Hood

There could be no doubt about the fact that the little girl was more than confused.

"But, Grandmother, why are your hands so... strange? They almost look like... paws!"

The grandmother adjusted her veil and chirped her answer. "Oh, dear, don't worry, those are just gloves. You know, I need to be kept warm."

"Oh," the girl said and looked at her grandmother again. "But, Grandmother, why do you have so much fur?"

"Oh, dear, that's not me, that's just a rug I wrapped around myself to be warm." The grandmother sounded less chirping this time, more like annoyed. "Any other questions, darling?"

The little girl's lip quivered. "But, Grandmother, why are you..." She stopped talking and stared at her grandmother. "Grandmother, are those horns? Have you grown horns?"

"Argh, damn little girl!" the grandmother screamed, throwing away her veil and jumping out of the bed onto the small girl, who shrieked in fear.

Much to both's surprise, the door slammed into the wall forcefully, and a figure not at all common to this fairy tale stood in it. "Tetsu! How dare you extend your hunting grounds to European fairy tales! Aren't our Chinese ones enough for you?" the Chinese man standing in the door scolded, obviously enraged. Little Red Riding Hood stopped shrieking and craned her neck to be able to look at him.

"Who are you?" she asked. "Are you the hunter? You aren't supposed to turn up before I'm eaten."

The Chinese came inside and shook his head while he went past them to the kitchen door. "No, dear, I am not a hunter, I am Count D, and the wolf is probably locked in here. Poor dear, being handled like this just because my bad T-chan couldn't get a grip on himself!" he cooed to the bundle of wolf lying in the kitchen. The totetsu had meanwhile gotten down from the girl and was now grumpily scratching his ear.

"Yeah, fine, Count, can we leave now that you've ruined my lunch?" he complained and was favoured with a glare from the mysterious Count.

"You behave, Tetsu! I am not yet done with you. Pray excuse my interruption. I assure you I shall take better care of him in the future." The Count bowed formally to both fairy tale creatures and then left, the grumbling totetsu in tow. Little Red Riding Hood and the wolf looked at each other.

"So... up to where have you come?" the wolf asked, and Little Red Riding Hood stretched out on the floor obligingly.

"Up to where you swallow me in one piece," she replied. "And please, be careful, I got my curls done only this morning."

"Okay," the wolf agreed and jumped on her.

Count D and T-chan heard the shriek from outside the little house and the Count tutted, clearly displeased. "See, Tetsu, that's what comes out of meddling with fairy tales other than your own," he chided.

His pet gave him a sour look. "Yeah, you're the right one to talk, Count. Who was a frog the whole last week because he thought he had to rescue the Frog King from being thrown against the wall?"

"That is beside the point," the Count replied, blushing a light red. But something had obviously occurred to Tetsu now, since he stopped and gazed at his master.

"Anyway, since when are you you again? When I left the shop this morning, you were still a frog. Did I miss something in the meantime?"

"Not at all," the kami replied stiffly, blushing deeper now. T-chan showed off all his sharp teeth in a wolfish grin.

"A-ha, got you, Count! So, what did he do? Throw you at the wall or kiss you? Did he finally kiss you? What happened afterwards? Did you stop after the kiss?"

"Tetsu!" the Count screamed in displeasure, but was cut off by a young man in hunter's clothes.

"Uh, excuse me... is the Grandmother's house in this direction?" His gaze wandered in confusion from the richly dressed stranger to his strange sheep-like dog.

"Yes, it is, and you had better hurry, as both should have been eaten by now," the stranger replied indignantly and resumed scolding his dog as soon as the hunter had said his thanks and continued on his way, shaking his head in wonder.

"Y'wouldn't believe what kind of people get into fairy tales nowadays!"

-End-

A/N: Yes, I finally got around to doing something new for this series ^^ Thank you, everybody, for your reviews :-)