The Hole In Her Heart by Mick
Well, Lola and I are back. This is going to be another sweet little story. It'll be a little sad, but not for long. Lots of happy times are included too and there's nothing too angsty, more like intense drama. Oh, and there is a happily ever after. A few things before we begin...
Stephenie Meyer owns all these wonderful characters. I promise she will get them all back, slightly worse for wear, at the end of my story.
Chapter 4 – Words Of Admission
"Wow, now this is a lunch." Emmett loudly laughed as he took in all the food that the girls were still carrying in from the kitchen.
Alice had pulled a few of Charlie's old chairs from the basement in order to accommodate everyone. The little dining room was cramped at best and Bella was grateful that no one seemed to mind. She also silently thanked Alice for deciding on Mexican food. It was excellent and fell into all three of Bella's categories; quick, easy and cheap. All three were essential requirements in her mind for entertaining on the fly.
She loved to cook, but these days her main focus had to be her daughter, so finding time to participate in her hobbies was no longer an option. Bella looked amused when all the food was finally laid out on the table. There was barely enough room for everyone's own plate, and she had no idea how the table remained standing; especially once Emmett propped his huge arms on it then quickly removed them as he noticed it tilt his way.
As everyone else sat down, the adults took turns passing the children around the table so that everyone had a chance to eat. Without missing a beat, Rose handed Ethan off to Edward. Not being accustomed to handling children, Edward didn't know which way to turn. Even at three months, his nephew was fidgety and he was grateful to his twin brother when Emmett reached over, taking his son back. His lack of comfort hadn't escaped Bella's notice though and she turned away before he could see her staring at him but not before she caught Alice's knowing glance.
She was almost grateful for his unease at holding Ethan as it helped her to realize that Edward was uncomfortable around all children and not just hers. She smiled to herself as she ate, noticing that once again when Edward was handed Emily, he squirmed almost as much as the baby.
It wasn't long before Alice declared herself stuffed and reached over to take Tansy from Bella.
"Give her here Bella. You should really finish eating before everything gets cold." Alice held the baby close as Jasper watched, unable to tear his eyes away from the sight of Alice holding the tiny infant. It wasn't long before Jasper reached over to take her from Alice. He looked over at Bella for approval; she nodded, unable to hide her surprise.
If Jasper wanted to hold Tansy, and Tansy was willing, who was she to argue. Not ten minutes later though, Jasper stood up with an excuse to refill the water pitcher handing Tansy right off to Edward who had already handed Emily off to Esme. Bella glared at Alice who showed a sudden interest in the avocado halves that were once filled with guacamole. Alice glared right back, unaffected by Bella's show of emotions.
Bella's thoughts were murderous as she came to the realization that Alice and Jasper planned all along to hand her daughter off to Edward. She was tempted to say something out loud but when she noticed that Tansy accepted Edward's embrace so easily she stopped. She didn't fidget as his niece and nephew had, she simply lay there only occasionally batting at his chest as he cradled her in his arm. Bella caught him glance down every few seconds at the infant in his arms as if he couldn't believe that he was able to hold her. It seemed as if he was expecting her to do something, such as cry, but that never happened. Bella's heart melted as she glanced over at him but the softness didn't stay long, it rarely did.
Her heart ached when she realized that it should have been Jacob sitting there across the table from her, holding their daughter. She snapped herself out of the daydream with a quiet snort. Her life was rooted in reality now. Fantasies and childhood dreams held no part in it. As Edward reached with his free hand to pick up his glass of water, Tansy let out a huge sigh, causing both Alice and Bella to instantly center their attention on her.
Noticing where their gazes went, Jasper followed suit as he sat back down and stared at Edward as if waiting for something to happen. Edward quietly drank down his water, unaware that he was being watched. It didn't take long for the others, everyone except Emmett, to stop eating and stare at Edward as he sat holding the baby. He eventually felt everyone's eyes on him and stopped mid-sip to look around the table.
"What? Do I have something on my shirt?" He said as he held the water glass right over Tansy. He glanced down at his shirt and caught the adoring gaze of Tansy Black staring back at him. Bella caught it too but it was Alice that spoke first.
"No Edward, it's just that usually Tansy is much more lethargic. She's not usually this awake and especially not with strangers." Alice tilted her head regarding him with awe.
Edward glanced down nervously slowly putting the water glass back on the table. "Am I doing something wrong?"
"No, nothing wrong at all!" Bella answered as she cocked her head to the side to take him in. What did her daughter see in Edward that she herself had missed?
The moment was short lived though as Tansy's next move was a grasp to her face and a swift yank on her tube. Knocking over her chair Bella was on her feet as the tube came sliding out among a series of coughs and gags from the baby. Alice groaned and put her head in her hands as Bella swiftly made her way around the table grabbing Tansy from Edward before heading toward the bedroom with her.
"What a little minx she is." Alice said tossing her napkin down on the table and crossing her arms as she fell back into her chair. "Just when her mama is starting to enjoy herself and feel normal, she goes and dislodges her feeding tube." Alice shook her head sadly sighing as Jasper reached over to give her a hug.
"Was I holding her wrong?" Edward's voice sounded worried as he looked around the table. He wasn't sure who to look to for answers. His first glance was at Rose, cradling her own daughter close to her. His sister-in-law shook her head sadly and threw Alice a questioning look.
"No Edward. It's not the first time she's pulled it out, and it certainly won't be the last. It's just that Bella forgets that I am here, and that she has friends as well as other people that she can depend on. Jacob really did a number on her when he walked out." Alice said bitterly as she reached for the water Jasper placed in front of her. She swished it around, wishing it were something stronger.
"Should I go offer assistance?" Carlisle was wiping his mouth with his napkin and was just about standing before Alice could get the words out.
"There's no need Dr. Cullen. Bella's a pro at putting it back in. Thanks for the offer though." Alice smiled warmly at Jasper's father.
"Carlisle. Alice, please just call me Carlisle." Carlisle replied to her as he folded his hands in front of him. He smiled over at his son, clearly approving of his girlfriend. Esme looked at her husband then around the table, clearly the fixer of everything that was broken, she tried to heal everyone's unease.
"I have an idea, why don't Carlisle and I stay behind, watch the babies while you all go have fun with Bella and Alice's friends tonight at the bar?" Esme said as she took in her son Edward's guilty look.
"Not gonna happen Esme." Alice shook her head sadly. "Bella definitely won't be leaving Tansy's side anytime soon after this little stunt. Don't worry Edward, you did nothing wrong. But Tansy has to have that tube in so Bella can supplement her diet." She pushed food around on her plate absently but never took in another bite. Casual talk continued around the table before Bella returned carrying her daughter offering a string of apologies for leaving so abruptly.
"She sure knew what she was doing. I couldn't get it back in so she's going to have to wait until tomorrow when we see Dr. Smith." Bella held Tansy up toward the ceiling and shook her gently from side to side. "Enjoy your one night of freedom from the tube young lady. We'll just have to tape it down better in the future." As she lowered her from the ceiling, Bella blew raspberries on her daughter's stomach and was rewarded with a string of tired sounding laughs from her.
Bella glanced around the table and smiled to everyone, still offering silent apologies with her expression. As she looked at each one, her eyes settled on Edward's. His expression back to her told her that she didn't need to offer any apology at all and she smiled slowly, softly, and sadly.
"Bella, can we see Tansy's room now?" Esme asked as she stood from the table. Esme's voice broke Edward and Bella's eye contact when Bella turned slightly to address Esme directly.
"Of course, the light is perfect in there right now. Um, Rose, you may want to come too; but don't forget this is just an idea. We can still go with whatever scenery or backdrop you prefer. That is if you really want to do it at all. Esme, please don't feel like you have to do this." Bella was careful to make sure she left them the option of not engaging her work at all.
"Oh, I can't wait to see it." Rose scooted around a few chairs as Alice reached for Ethan. The girls all walked down the short hallway towards the bedrooms leaving the Cullen men staring at each other blankly. Carlisle and his sons looked around at each other, shrugged, then silently went back to their plates continued eating as if nothing happened.
"Bella! My word, did you and Alice do all this?" Rose was stunned beyond words. She spun around the room with Emily in her arms as she took in the woodland scene throughout the entire room. She looked over at the window which faced the woods.
In a blink of the eyes, you could not make out the difference between the two. The room simply continued the picture of the woods outside the window. Bella blushed as she took in Rose's praise while waiting for Esme's assessment.
"Guilty. We actually started with just one picture. According to Alice, Tansy just had to have a Prince Charming on his horse. Then of course we had to add his princess." Bella gestured toward the wall where a young princess with Tansy's features was painted. Alice smirked as Bella explained the various pictures to Rose and a still silent Esme.
"It just snowballed from there. I still add little touches from time to time, or as the ideas hit me. Oh, and the birds with the banner was also one of the first things painted." Bella pointed to where two realistic looking birds flew with a banner between them that read 'Tansy Elizabeth Black' in bold letters. Esme's silence had Bella on edge and she tried to explain further, her words now coming out in a rush.
"Something like this might look too dramatic in your house Esme. I was trying to think of a way to have a bigger window in the room you want to use as a nursery to let more natural light. Babies love natural light. Of course, I don't want to ruin the look of the outside of your house by having just one window bigger on it. Do you have any ideas?" Bella looked over as Esme stared at the bright blue ceiling covered with fat, puffy clouds that looked like they were floating in air. She didn't need to wait long for Esme's reply.
"Bella, this room is magical. I don't care what the outside of the house looks like. You are going to design and decorate the nursery for us. I'll be right back; I'm going to get the boys. They have to see this. Edward will have to be involved in the discussion of the window anyway; if anyone would know of a way, it's him." Esme left the room quickly and returned with the men following her.
Bella placed Tansy in her crib tucking a soft blanket around her little form. She reached to wind up the mobile that hung overhead and just as it started to softly play, she turned to address Edward.
"Edward, I was just talking to your mother about possibly putting a bigger window in the room that she wants to use as the nursery. But, I don't want to ruin the outside look of the house or affect anything structural. The window in here used to be much smaller, but we enlarged the length so that it still lines up with the other windows from the outside and lets in much more natural sunlight. Any ideas?" Bella put her hands on her hips as she started to talk shop with the adults.
"Honestly, using one of the spare bedrooms limits you because they all face the same direction. It would be easier to use the corner den on the second floor as a nursery. Then there'd be no problem adding another window on the western-facing wall. Which room were you thinking of using?" Edward walked over to the wall that held the window peering outside before turning to face his mother and Bella with his hands on his hips. Bella automatically turned away from his gaze to face Esme.
"Well, I was thinking of yours or Jasper's old bedroom actually. But it makes sense to use the den now that I think of it. It'll be much larger and all the future grandbabies can use it as well then." Esme glanced around, not so subtly, at her two unmarried sons. Carlisle, saying nothing just stood behind his wife with his hands on her shoulders, staring at Edward and Jasper.
Edward looked sharply back at his parents with a warning glare while Jasper, refusing to look uncomfortable simply smiled, encircling Alice's waist as she held a content Ethan. Alice leaned back into his arms, not caring about the awkward angle his body was in since she was so short. To them, it just felt right.
"Well, I wouldn't feel right about putting a forest in the middle of your home. Here it just blended into the surroundings outside. It was almost by accident that it happened that way, adding items piece by piece. Have you thought about a scene or background you'd like?" Bella tried to get ideas out of Esme.
"No, I hadn't thought that far ahead. And, to be frank, I really didn't think anything like this was even possible. How about if I have Edward start with the window and clearing out the room? Once it is ready to be worked on, you will have to come back over and then we can have a brainstorming session in the room itself?" Esme walked over toward the window to stare out with Edward. "How long do you think it would take you Edward?"
"I can have my men start on it next week. I'll do the measuring and of course I'll be there to supervise them. Once the order is placed for the window, it'll probably be done in a few days." Edward now looked over at Bella and smiled. "Would that work okay for you?"
"Perfect, now, who's up for a walk in the real woods?" Bella asked as she pulled her now fussing daughter from her crib.
"The logistics of this shouldn't be that hard." Emmett said, shaking his head as he tried to make sense of the chaos before them.
"Oh come on, there's three of them and what, two, four, six, eight of us. How hard can this be?" Carlisle looked at Esme.
"Well, clearly Tansy should go into the backpack, she's the littlest." Edward threw his two cents in like it was the obvious answer.
"Uh uh Edward, she's the littlest with the least muscle tone. She can't hold her head up enough in the backpack, that's why we never use it." Alice cradled Tansy protectively in her arms as she looked at Edward like he should have known that already.
"Well, how about if the girls use the strollers and Ethan goes into the carrier?" Esme said with her hands on her hips.
"Come here Emmett." The tone of Bella's voice left no room for negotiation. She was tired of trying to figure it out and just wanting to get into the woods left her feeling edgy. Deciding she didn't care who watched which baby, she roughly adjusted the carrier around Emmett and made it as snug as possible over his broad chest. "There you go big guy." She said, giving his now fabric covered chest a light punch.
"It's perfect Bella." Rose said as she plopped Ethan down in Emmett's pouch. Ethan kicked his pudgy legs squealing as Rose straightened out his pants that had bunched up when she slid him in.
"Cool, I got a built-in mini-me." Emmett started off on the trail with his brother's walking after him laughing at his silliness.
Carlisle and Esme looked at each other dreamily as they joined hands and started after their sons and grandson.
"Come here Beautiful." Bella said, reaching to take Tansy from Alice.
"Bella, I'll take care of Tansy. Go ahead and babysit the boys on the trail so they don't stomp into the native vegetation or something." Strolls in the woods were so not Alice's thing but she gamely endured them for the sake of Bella's sanity. She set Tansy into the neighbor's stroller, giving Tansy's own stroller to Rose to use for Emily.
"Thanks Alice. I would like to talk to Esme a bit more. Rose, if you have any trouble with it, Alice is a pro with all those buckles." Bella said as she lightly jogged ahead of them to catch up with Carlisle and Esme.
Stopping just even with the older couple had Bella rethinking her need to speak with Esme. They were so wrapped up in each other, neither one acknowledged Bella's appearance as they held hands talking softly to each other. Bella quickly realized that she was intruding on their conversation; their very private conversation at that. Blushing, she made her way just ahead of them to a large rock and sat down quickly to untie her shoe. As they approached her, Bella began making a show of saying there was something in it while pretending to shake it out. Assuring them she was fine, she waved them on ahead of her.
Bella sat on the rock waiting for Alice and Rose to catch up to her. Seeing them at the entrance of the woods she realized that she had a few moments alone so she quickly took in the quietness. She focused her eyes on Carlisle and Esme's retreating backs and closed off her peripheral vision to concentrate on just them.
The woods around her continued to breathe, birds flying, insects buzzing, chipmunks and squirrels everywhere. But Bella paid no attention to any of it. She smiled sadly at their backs, realizing that she had that kind of love once, but was unlikely to find it again.
Then she formed her next thought. She realized that she never really had that kind of love with Jacob. The kind of intimacy that had people wanting to be in her presence, as she wanted to be in Esme's. The woman's very nature gave off calming waves of confidence and warmth, it was no wonder Carlisle fell head over heels for her and never let her go. The brief moment of intimacy that Bella had witnessed when she intruded on them helped her to realize that the kind of love she and Jacob had shared was on the opposite end of the spectrum from the kind Dr. and Mrs. Carlisle Cullen shared. She blushed rethinking of the conversation that she overheard and looked back down at the shoe in her hand to take her mind off them.
Shaking off her daydream of the perfect couple, Bella laughed when Alice and Rose finally made it to her. She quickly tied her shoe and stood up, joining them as they continued to crawl at a snail's pace, the babies completely content in the strollers, just taking in the surroundings.
"Bella, what were you thinking about just now? We're in the woods for crying out loud, how could you possibly become that flushed out here?" Alice's voice seeped with curiosity.
"I bet I know what it was. You overheard them talking didn't you?" As Bella's skin continued to redden, Rose laughed. "I knew it! Those two are so lovey dovey it's ridiculous. Even after all these years, it's like they live in their own private bubble or something."
"It's just so sweet that after all these years they can still be that much in love. I didn't even last two years and I still don't know what I did wrong." Bella drew her legs up onto the boulder resting her chin on her knees. She turned her head sideways to take in Alice and Rosalie. "It's just that when I think of my future of being alone? I can deal with it. But Tansy deserves so much more than me. I feel like a big, fat, failure and she's the one that has to suffer with me as a single parent. Why couldn't Jacob love me enough to stay?" Bella's voice sounded so pitiful that Alice set the brake on the stroller and leaned against the rock to hold her.
"Aww, Sweetie. I will never tell you 'I told you so' about Jake. It's his loss, but I will tell you what went wrong. You are so loving and giving; you gave him one hundred percent and that should have been enough. But then you two created that magnificent creature over there." Both Alice and Bella looked over to where Rose was squatted down by the stroller playing with Tansy. "It's not your fault that she just needs a little extra attention right now. And you give her that, one hundred and ten percent, because she needs you to survive Bella. Jacob needed you only to stroke his own ego but when you started putting your daughter first, that's when he started to pull away. Don't you see? You were so giving and loving to him that you didn't see how selfish he was to you."
Alice reached up to brush Bella's hair softly away from her face. Bella sat, still smiling sadly as she looked at her daughter. She finally turned her face back to face her friend and took a deep breath to compose herself. Straightening up, she leaped down from the rock.
"What kind of a man gets jealous over his own child? Who leaves their daughter just when she needs her daddy the most?" Bella bitterly spoke the words, causing Rose and Alice to both stare at her in awe. "Seriously? Rose, I bet Emmett would never leave you or the twins if they got sick." Bella wasn't exactly sure where she was going with the analogy but she stood there with her hands on her hips as if expecting her to really answer.
"Bella, it's not fair for me to say anything. I didn't know Jacob. But to be honest, hearing what I have about him, I'm not sure I ever really want to meet him. And it's probably best if he never meets Emmett, he's still riding high on the whole 'daddy' thing. I'm not so sure he would be able to restrain himself from teaching your husband a thing or two." Rose's temper was almost visible on her face as her eyes flashed at the mere thought of being in Bella's position; left to care for her children alone because Emmett would decide she wasn't devoted enough to his needs.
"But how? You said he's high from being a daddy." Bella squinted at Rose saying the words in an accusing manner before softening her voice. She looked around the space at the three of them, making sure no one else could hear. As she continued to speak, she jabbed herself in the chest. "I want to know how it's possible that someone can just leave. If I could understand it then maybe I could accept it, but I can't. How come you get it and I don't? How come Emmett can accept that you split your time between two children and that he now comes in third in your life? How is it fair that I couldn't even manage to have Jacob accept being second in my life? It's not like it was another man, it was his daughter, his very own flesh and blood for crying out loud!"
At Bella's stifled groan Alice stepped toward her slowly. She was being careful, letting Bella vent her anger out before she spoke to her friend. Looking up the path she saw that the others were stopping further in near the outhouses and that they were waiting for them. She glanced carefully at Rose noticing the frown on her beautiful face and knew she had to do something to make this whole situation right, at least for one day.
"Bella, you know, this is not the end for you and Tansy. You can't compare yourself and Tansy to Rose and Emily, or any others for that matter." Her eyes now shined with humor as she bit her lip, waiting for one of them to ask the obvious question. Her face brightened as she answered Bella's question of 'why not'. "Because men don't leave, they stick by you no matter what. You know what kind of animal leaves? Cowardly dogs, that's the kind."
The shocked look on Bella's face as she took in Alice calling her husband a dog made her blink several times quickly as she processed the statement. She glanced at Alice who stood straight and as tall as possible with her hands on her hips, daring Bella to say otherwise. She could only smile at her little friend as they stood in the middle of the woods, Alice looking like she belonged on a Paris runway and Bella feeling like she was standing in a fighting ring. It wasn't until she heard Rose's snort of laughter that she joined in, causing Alice to giggle and close the gap between them as she drew her in for a hug.
"Thanks you two, I needed that." Bella said from the muffle of their huddle before breaking away then returning to her daughter's stroller to continue their walk.
"So Edward? Want to tell me what made you jam your foot so far into your mouth back there?" Jasper stuffed his hands into his jeans pockets making a mental note of how empty his arms felt when he couldn't be holding or touching Alice. Looking back at the three women as they made their way toward them, he smiled in her direction, even knowing that she would never see from that distance.
"Dunno what you're talking about Jasper." Edward played stupid as he looked at his brother, clearly uncomfortable with being questioned.
"Don't give me that. You've never been awkward in front of a girl before, ever." Jasper enunciated the last word as he leaned closer to Edward to emphasize it. "You want to let us in on it?"
"Let you in on what, exactly?" Edward's annoyed voice was just loud enough that his parents and Emmett now joined in.
"We all heard you. I mean, come on…you actually commented on the kid being inside her?" Emmett's voice made the innocent comment sound like a sexual innuendo.
"Your brothers are right Edward." Esme walked up to hug her son. "What happened to that smooth, suave bit of 'Cullen confidence' that your father so wisely taught you to use? Did you not learn anything?"
"You know, you all could be a bit more supportive instead of ganging up on me." Edward managed to look hurt as he glanced at them all before he finally let his gaze fall onto his father.
"Son, you know we've been supportive of every decision you have ever made in your life. Every girlfriend you brought home we approved of even when we knew better. When you decided you didn't want to be a doctor anymore and left medical school, we supported that. We fought against it, but still in the end we supported the fact that it was ultimately your own decision." Carlisle stared at Edward, his face growing more stern. "I remember having a little talk with you last year, around Labor Day if you recall."
"Yeah, I remember Dad. Your point is?" Edward put his hands in his pockets rocking slightly on his feet, clearly uncomfortable with his father remembering the comments he made upon first meeting Isabella Black.
"I remember then that you were quite taken with a certain brunette. Clearly the months that have passed have not lessened that any. All I am saying is to be careful, Isabella does not need any more emotional baggage right now. She is still married, like it or not, to Jacob Black and through her daughter, she will always have that tie to him." Carlisle stepped forward and embraced his son. "Edward, son, we love you. We will support you no matter what, we always have. All we are asking is that you tread very carefully here. That's all."
Esme reached her hand out allowing her husband to step into her embrace. As she placed her arm around his waist, she looked back at their son and smiled. "Just do the right thing Edward. You always do."
As the women approached with the strollers, the group fell into different configurations while they finished the path. At one point, Bella found herself walking with Esme as she pushed Tansy's stroller. She wasn't sure when it exactly happened but suddenly Edward was on her other side, almost brushing against her on the narrow trail. He made no sound whatsoever, but just walked silently next to her as she conversed with Esme about the upcoming project.
He didn't feel the need to direct the conversation around himself, to make others feel like he was so important. He allowed Bella and Esme talk about their plans for the room; he just listened to them, only jumping in with an occasional thought or idea when appropriate. Even Bella had to admit that his ideas were good. Edward never once made any disparaging remark to Bella about the project or changed her ideas commenting that his way would be better. She was prepared for it, but it never happened. Edward stayed silent, even after Esme left them and Bella was left walking alone with him and her daughter. She found it oddly comforting.
When he finally did speak to her, he said words she never thought she would hear a man say.
"Bella, I want to apologize for the remark I made when we met earlier at your house." Edward turned to slightly face her while they walked.
"It's alright Edward. It was no big deal really; I just got a little too defensive. I tend to do that where she is concerned." Bella nodded her head toward the stroller in front of her. "You see, I'm use to people making their remarks about her. The general public seems to think it's socially acceptable to comment on her condition."
"Well, I don't know enough about it to comment on it. But I do think, in fact I know, it wasn't that little girl that had me tongue tied back there." Edward stopped and looked around them to make sure no one else was near.
"Well, hearing it in public is one thing but hearing it on my own front lawn was…wait. Edward, what do you mean by it wasn't her? Most people flip when they see how small she is and see the tube in her nose." Bella's eyes furrowed in confusion but Edward couldn't tell if she was deliberately making him say they words to make him suffer or if she truly didn't understand the power she held over him.
"No, it definitely wasn't the nasogastric tube." Edward decided he would tell her at a later date about his ambitions to be a doctor. Instead, he let his words sit in the air around them so she would know he could speak her language even if it was laced with big words. "People's general acceptance of others with disabilities is ignorant at best, and that goes for any disability. She doesn't make me uncomfortable at all."
"Okay, then what was that comment you made all about? You know, the one where you could remember her being inside me?" Bella laughed before she realized that Edward's own awkwardness was on par with a disability and she had just committed the exact same crime that she accused other people of.
"This isn't coming out right at all. It's not your daughter that has me tongue tied Bella. It's you." Edward pointed at Bella but just as he said the words, they heard a collective gasp around them.
Had they not been so wrapped up in each other's presence and their own conversation, Edward and Bella would have been more aware of their surroundings. Neither one realized when they had stopped walking and were blocking the entire path from the others. They now found themselves surrounded by Edward's family and Bella's friend, all of who heard Edward's admission that it was she that made him nervous.
Bella took in the smiles of the people surrounding them. Her eyes immediately found Alice who was planted directly in front of Jasper. She practically hopped as she stood there; clapping her hands excitedly in front of her while Jasper rested his hands on her shoulders. Bella's mouth fell open as she took in the gravity of Edward's words and all their reactions. She then looked over at Edward who stood opposite from her on the path. He had one hand on his hip and the other was rubbing the back of his neck, looking every bit as embarrassed as Bella.