Mick's note - this chapter is being posted with my most sincere apology. I have to admit that I thought of giving up on this story...Those of you that keep in touch with me via email know that the precious child that inspired this story has passed away. For all the words I have typed, there just didn't seem to be anymore that I could add that would make this tragic situation any better. How unfair and unjust is it that I can write an ending, happy or sad, for my character, and yet I could do nothing more than offer a few lame little words of encouragement to my friends. We are coming up on the 1 year mark of precious little Evelyn's death and it hit me that, although she lost her courageous battle, my character of Tansy could not...would not. With that thought in my head, I am set on finishing this story, if for no other reason than to ease my own sadness for there truly is nothing I can say to take away the sting of losing a child. It is a feeling that way too many of us are familiar with. Thank you all so very much for all the words you sent me, they truly helped me when I could find none of my own...I may not have been able to save Evelyn's life, but I am going to save Tansy's. :)
and before I forget, Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga.
Chapter 13 Not So Rude Awakenings
"I'm actually looking forward to tomorrow Bella. I'd like to show you what I do for a living." Turning as he spoke, Edward finished tying the drawstring of his pajama bottoms. He frowned when he saw Bella looking down at her daughter in the middle of the bed. "What's wrong?"
Crossing the short distance between them, Edward wrapped his arms around Bella and waited for her reply.
"Yeah, that'll be nice. I'd like to see where you work." The words fell from Bella's lips, like an automated response to his question.
"But that's not what's bothering you. What is it Bella?" Edward turned Bella's body to face him and noticed that while her body turned, her face remained focused on the baby on his bed.
"She went to sleep too easily tonight." Bella's forehead was creased in a frown. "I forgot to pack her thermometer. I hope she's okay."
Edward wrapped his arms completely around her, noting how perfectly she fit into his embrace. Realizing that these health issues were the center of Bella's life right now, Edward decided to take a back seat. He stepped away and moved closer to Tansy, observing her silently.
"Does she have a fever or something then?" Edward leaned across his bed brushing Tansy's hair gently from her forehead before resting his palm against her skin. "She doesn't feel warm."
"No, maybe she just tired herself out from today. I am just being a worrywart. I can't believe I forgot that damn thermometer. I never forget that thing, I'm such an idiot!" Bella berated herself as she took in Edward's fatherly concern. She gave a two second thought to Jacob and wondered if he was enjoying himself wherever he was while she and Edward worried over little Tansy.
"Listen, if you're that worried, I happen to know there's a damn good doctor in the house. There also happens to be a set of twins rooming with their parents next door and I bet they would have one. Want me to ask?" Edward was already straightening up and making his way toward the door before he heard Bella call to him.
"Maybe ask Rose instead of Carlisle. It's probably nothing and I've already bothered him enough today." Bella moved to sit down on the edge of the bed and Edward caught a glimpse of her smoothing her daughter's hair back before he ducked into the hallway.
Knocking softly on his brother's bedroom door, Edward wasn't surprised to hear his twin mumble the same curse word he did, which was exactly what he was interrupting judging from the sounds on the other side of the door. Emmett might be pissed at him briefly for cockblocking him, but also knew that if the situation was reversed, his brother would have no qualms about interrupting Edward during sex if it was in regards to the well-being of his twins.
After hearing a series of soft thuds and muted footfalls, the door managed to swing open and Edward was met with Emmett's glare as he adjusted himself in his obviously too snug boxers.
"Is the house on fire?" Emmett made a show of looking past Edward and down the hall.
He stepped aside just enough that Edward caught a glimpse, actually more than a glimpse of Rose laying only partially covered in the middle of the bed. Edward busied himself with looking at the ceiling when he realized that Rose's breasts were out and there was no child attached.
"Of course not. Listen, I'm sorry to interrupt, but Bella is worried about Tansy and I was wondering if you have a thermometer we could borrow." Edward kept his gaze upward as he caught Rose's movements out of the corner of his eye.
"Hang on a second Ed." Hearing Rose's voice as it moved in the room, Edward momentarily forgot and looked at her across the room. He instantly regretted it as he saw her reach for her robe and put it on, unintentionally giving him a view of her entire naked self. Rosalie Cullen was definitely not ashamed of her naked body.
With a noise that Edward couldn't quite place, Emmett grabbed the thermometer that Rose now held and all but flung it at his brother before shutting the door on him. Edward heard Emmett's voice but not Rose's reply as the bed creaked and he heard a thud as it obviously hit a wall. He briefly felt sorry for his niece and nephew and wondered just how they could sleep in the same room.
Walking back to his own bedroom and the little family that waited there for him, Edward gave more thought to his own predicament. Going and fetching a thermometer hardly seemed like help, but he knew that Bella appreciated it and he had an insatiable desire to help her. No not, help her, to take care of her….and her daughter. He had to help them both. His girls needed his help. His girls? Edward's steps faltered briefly and he leaned back against the wall in the hallway. When did he start thinking of them as his girls? Smiling at the thought of calling them his, he continued on to his own bedroom and handed Bella the thermometer, not explaining what his grin was for.
After she had declared that her daughter was fine, she slumped down on the floor next to Edward's bed and rested her head against the back of it before letting out a deep sigh.
"What's that for?" Edward smiled as he looked down at a disheveled Bella before joining her on the floor.
"I can't believe this weekend is over, I had a really good time. I really enjoy your family Edward. This is what it should all be about, making time for each other and being in each other's lives. I never had that. Tansy will never have that." Bella's voice trailed off as she turned her head upward and squinted at the harsh overhead light.
Edward immediately jumped up and turned on the lamp in the corner before shutting off the offending light and watched as Bella's face softened.
"Better?" He asked her before sitting down to join her again on the floor.
"From the light? Yes. From the thought? No. I just can't believe what a fool I was with Jake. I just feel like a fool for panicking about her falling asleep and then even more of a fool because the reason I have her at all is I was foolish enough to believe that he really cared for me. Sorry, I am going off in a million different directions. Just one thing makes me think of another, then another, then another. Before I know it, my mind starts racing and it's really difficult to pull myself back from it sometimes, to focus on a single thought again." Bella explained herself away as Edward reached over and put his arm around her, realizing that she just needed a little support.
Knowing that he needed to take her mind off her current thoughts, Edward decided to try getting Bella to focus on him rather than Jake's abhorrent treatment of her.
"Bella, did I ever tell you what I remember most about meeting you last year at that party?" Edward played with the edge of Bella's hair, hoping that between his arm around her shoulder and the relaxing feel of him moving his hand through her hair she would concentrate on something other than herself and her current situation.
"No. I barely remember that party really. I was in my own little rose-colored world back then." Smiling as she turned her head at Edward, and wanting him to realize that she herself recognizing what he was doing and she was fully on board with changing the subject and trying to take her mind off the current thoughts.
"Well, I had broken up with my girlfriend, which made everyone in my family happy except me. When you mention that this is what family should be about – spending time together like this, you're absolutely right. Tanya didn't see it that way though and took every opportunity to drive a wedge between me and my family. I didn't see what she was doing. I thought she was the greatest thing since sliced bread." Edward shook his head as Bella looked at him, disbelieving that he could have fallen for someone like that.
"Rose colored glasses?" Bella smiled at Edward as she leaned against him harder, nudging him with her shoulder.
"Yeah." Edward agreed with Bella and nudged her back. "Anyway, whenever someone would try to tell me I would laugh it off. And apparently everyone saw it but me. My brothers, my parents, my co-workers. Everyone. It even got so bad as Ben's wife Angela? She refused to go out with us as a couple because of what a 'snotty bitch' Tanya was." Edward mimicked a voice that Bella assumed was supposed to be Ben's wife, Angela. "I wish I would have paid more attention back then to what everyone around me was saying. No one could tell me anything though because I had myself convinced that we were in love with each other."
"So, you didn't love her?" Bella's question snapped Edward out of his memories.
"I thought I did, but the more I began telling her what I wanted out of our relationship and out of life, the more she began pulling away from me. Or rather she began pulling me away from my family. It worked and I let her do that for quite some time. By the time I recognized it for what it was, I was already in over my head." Edward shook his head at his stupidity.
"Like me with Jake. I think a part of me always knew he wasn't right but he seemed so perfect in the beginning. You know what's messed up Edward? All the times Alice tried to tell me that Jake wasn't right for me and I never listened. When I told her I was getting married, she stopped telling me things about him and just stood by me and supported me. Through the wedding, which she planned entirely, through my pregnancy and through Tansy's health scares. She has always been there for me and Tansy. And she never once, not once, threw it in my face the old 'I told you so'." Bella's face became almost reverent as she talked about her dear friend, tears pooling in her eyes but not being given the chance to fall as Edward began speaking.
"See? I find that fascinating." Edward said, turning his body to face Bella. He gave a quick look up on his bed to check Bella's daughter before facing Bella again. "I've talked about this with my mom and dad you know. When I told them how I felt about you. I really didn't need to ask, they're both crazy about you by the way. But I did tell them my intentions to make sure they were aware that someday I would be bringing my ready-made family to join my real family."
Edward stared as Bella's mouth turned into a small smile in complete contrast to the huge blush covering her face neck.
"Esme in particular was grateful. She knew you and Alice were close to each other through work and she kept saying how grateful she was that you had her in your life to step up when your husband failed you. He did fail you Bella." Edward waited for Bella's reaction, not sure if he crossed the line.
"Ya think?" Bella said sarcastically, following it with a most unladylike snort. Giving a quick look to the bed to make sure she didn't wake her daughter, Bella smiled as she tried to lighten the conversation. "What did your dad say about me?"
"He remembers meeting you at the party. He also remembers pulling me off to the side and mentioning that I seemed preoccupied by you. Back then he couldn't tell if it was you specifically or if it was because you had a husband and a child on the way. You see, Emmett and Rose were in the same space as you, with the spouse and the whole family on the way thing. I admit I was a teeny bit jealous of my brother back then so my dad couldn't figure if it was you or the idea of a wife and family that I was hung up on. Remember I was just coming off my relationship with Tanya and maybe it was more than a teeny bit of jealousy." Edward himself was blushing now as he spoke of his feelings toward Bella and his own brother.
"But what did Carlisle say about me? Does he like me?" Bella's voice sounded almost childlike and Edward couldn't help but smile.
"What are we? 12? Does she like me? Does he want to talk to me?" Edward poked fun at teenage angst and pre-pubescent ideals, knowing Bella would pick up on it. "Don't worry, he adores you. What he found most fascinating about your situation though, and maybe it's because he's so close to us all, is that a man could just leave his wife and child. The thought is just so inconceivable to him. I feel like I should warn you though, both my parents have talked to Alice about you. They are both extremely grateful to her, for what she's done for Jasper as well as her being there to support you when you had no one else."
"Well, after Tansy was born I couldn't handle all the restrictions Victoria set in place at work. Alice was the one who helped me see that freelancing my work might be an answer. It's been a little tough, but having Alice as my wingwoman really helps, especially when she moved in with me. She takes care of half of the bills and helps with the house as well as Tansy. Her patience with Tansy is unbelievable. I think she has a soft spot for her because she's on the piddlin' side of puny as Alice would say." Bella sighed and made a move to get up off the floor, stretching as she did.
She raised her hands above her head, pulling her shirt up and briefly exposing her bare stomach to Edward. Still on the floor and in mid-stretch, it wasn't until she heard a soft gasp from him that she looked down and tugged on her shirt.
"Ok, I know it looks gruesome, but it's not polite to stare." Bella tried to joke about her figure as Edward pulled her closer to where he sat.
"That's not it. Not that at all." Edward pulled her to him so that she was cradled in his lap on the floor.
"Well, I know it's not perfect yet, but I'm getting there. I mean, it's taking forever to lose it all, but I have a lot going on! Some days I am lucky I remember to eat at all and some days I only what I can grab as a quick bite of something fast food. I try to watch what I eat." Bella defended herself as she wiggled in his lap slightly, trying to get more comfortable and not wanting to move from his arms.
"Bella, stop rambling. I only caught a small glimpse, but I want to see more." Edward shifted Bella in his lap so she was cradled sideways like an infant. As she shook her head 'no' with a smug little smile on her lips he bent closer to her ear. "Why not Bella? Please? I promise not to make you uncomfortable."
The words were whispered softly and directly in her ear. Edward's soft breath, coupled with the soft feel of his tongue tracing her ear every so often had Bella shivering in spite of her negative answer. Craving more than just a quick look at her exposed flesh, he talked soothingly to her, caressing her as he spoke.
"Edward, why would you want to see my belly? It's never going to be perfect. All the creams and lotions in the world won't help hide those marks." Bella looked over Edward's shoulder at the bed. "They were worth it though."
"Yes they are." Edward agreed as the hand that wasn't supporting Bella's back traveled up her bent legs to her knees. As it continued its journey to her thigh, he could feel her shiver even more as the soft flannel caressed her under his hand.
Rather than go for the obvious kill that he was sure the now quivering Bella was now expecting, Edward moved his hand to run up the side of her hip instead of directly up to her flannel covered sex. As her head fell back, he knew it was the right choice and he could feel her body start to loosen under his hands. He slowly moved his head toward her ear and traced the outside curve with his tongue, causing Bella to sigh and mumble incoherently.
"Bel- la." Edward's voice sang her name softly, whining into her ear just before the tip of his tongue made contact with the sensitive flesh of her neck.
Bella's body giggled and shook as Edward's words and actions teased her and Edward's own body played off hers, thrilling in the fact that he could make her lose control like this. So out of control over her own emotions, Bella's mouth could no longer form the words her mind was trying to get it to speak.
"Edward, I've not been...Oh God! Do that again." Her hands moved as if on their own, pulling her hair to one side and out of the way. Even as she was making it easier for him, another part of her, a much smaller part she acknowledged, tried to get the words out. "I'm not. I don't think I can."
Bella couldn't form a coherent thought as Edward continued, a man on a mission.
Softly touching her and caressing her body, he reached for the bottom of her shirt and lifted it gently. Bella stiffened briefly and moved her hands to tug it right back down before he could see anything. Moving his hands from her waist, Edward cupped her face gently and turned it toward him. The position was awkward as he still cradled her body in his lap, but he knew he would be making them both much more comfortable soon.
As his hands now left her face, Bella tried to tear her eyes away from his. She shifted her head a millimeter, only to have him shift his and catch her eyes with his stare. Looking away and breaking contact was definitely not going to happen from her end. She could do nothing but stare into his eyes, taking in each fleck of color and every ring. She noticed that from the reflection of the lamp, his right eye appeared to shine just a little more, like maybe it had more specks of color to it?
She became so lost in his gaze that she never felt his arm snake around her back again as they reached for the edge of her shirt. Their eyes continued to lock on each other, even as she felt the fabric ride up against her skin. He broke their gaze briefly, needing to blink. As he did, he glanced down before bringing his eyes back to hers again, the question in them obvious as she nodded and stretched her arms above her to help him remove the top of her pajama. Still holding her gaze now, Edward moved his hands sightlessly around Bella's exposed skin. He took the opportunity to 'see' her body as a blind man would, using only his hands and sense of touch. He knew the spot where her daughter once was held as her skin became softer and only slightly loose. He thought briefly of Bella carrying his child there, nestled away safely inside as it grew.
A thought hit him swiftly. Would she even want more children, given all Tansy's cardiac problems? Edward filed away that thought for another time as he pulled back from her briefly to remove his own shirt. Tonight's goal was to help Bella feel more comfortable with him, not to scare her off with talk of their future. Tossing his shirt on top of her own, he reached his arms back around her and drew her exposed flesh against his own warm skin.
As Bella nestled her cheek against his chest, she lazily noticed his left nipple had a mole on it. In fact, she noticed several moles. Moving her eyes downward, she studied him in a way she wasn't able to at the pool. She was surprised to see that although he was certainly fit, he didn't have sculpted six pack abs. The thought of Edward Cullen not being perfect made her laugh slightly as she wondered why she was so afraid of him seeing her. He had no trouble showing off his not so perfect body and he seemed accepting of hers as he drew her closer to him, seeking the warmth their naked skin contact provided. Bella gave herself a shake as her thoughts hit her. After all, when you find someone you truly love, you learn to look past their flaws, just as Edward did.
Edward didn't try to go any farther with Bella tonight. There would be plenty of time to get to know her intimately in the future. Instead, he reached his hand up and grabbed a blanket from the edge of the bed, mindful that it wasn't the one Tansy lay on. He drew the blanket around them both, cradling a nearly limp Bella in his arms.
"We should get some sleep while she's letting us." Edward spoke the words to Bella as he tipped her head up to meet his. He placed a soft kiss on her lips before cradling her even closer against his body. "Sweet dreams Bella."
Her only response to him was a soft moan.
As fast as sleep claimed Bella, wrapped in Edward's warm embrace, was as fast as her daughter's cries woke her a mere few hours later.
Shrugging out of his warmth and instantly regretting it as her nipples let her know she was naked, she reached for her shirt, grateful for the soft lamplight that they had left on. She shrugged into the first shirt she grabbed, barely noticing that it was Edward's and not her own. As she moved toward the bed, she kicked her shirt under it, not caring in the moment. She tugged the sleeves up as she bent over to pick up her daughter, anxious to stop her crying before she woke the entire house.
After a few minutes, and realizing that the pacing the floor wasn't working, Bella made quick work of changing Tansy. She noticed that Edward was now fully awake, and very disheveled looking with the blanket still wrapped around his shoulders on the floor. She threw him a quick apology as she crossed to the bathroom to throw the diaper out, leaving her daughter on the bed for him to watch as she washed her hands. She thanked her lucky stars that Edward caught on and he turned immediately to kneel beside the bed and watch the crying infant, making sure she didn't roll off the bed.
He tried softly talking to her, nonsense about absolutely nothing, knowing it was more the tone of a person's voice that a baby would respond to. It seemed to do the trick for a few seconds before the cries became even louder and he was forced to pick her up. He stood up awkwardly, cradling Tansy against him. As Bella came out of the bathroom drying her hands on a towel, she noticed with a small bit of jealousy that her daughter was the one now lucky enough to be held against Edward's bare skin. In Bella's mind, her daughter had no idea of just how lucky she was in that position as she kept crying. As she watched Edward take a turn pacing the floor, Bella wondered if it was the disruption to her daughter's schedule that upset her.
Together they tried singing, and slow dancing. They swung her around, cradled her close, loosened her pajamas and swaddled her tightly. Still the crying refused to break. Eventually they gave up and decided to try and let her cry herself to sleep. Edward lay her down in the middle of the bed again as he crawled in next to her and lay on his side. He placed a hand gently on Tansy's back and rubbed softly, using a slow circular motion he had seen his mother and Rose use with the twins. He looked so tired that Bella briefly thought of taking Tansy into the other room.
"I'm just going to splash water on my face and brush my teeth. I swear I'll be right back and then I'll take her." Bella's nerves were already frazzled and her frenzied movements caused Edward to chuckle at her as he told her to take her time and that they weren't going anywhere.
"You laugh now Cullen, but sleep deprivation is not pretty, especially bright and early in the morning, don't forget you have to go in to work. I am already at work." With her daughter's screams still echoing in Bella's ears, she quickly made her way to the shared bathroom and closed the door to muffle the screams, hoping that they wouldn't be interrupting Emmett's family.
"Bella? Can I come in?" Rose's voice was soft on the other side of the door as she knocked.
"Hi Rose, sorry if her screaming is keeping you guys awake." Bella was embarrassed, after all, Rose was Emmett's wife, she herself was just a houseguest.
"No Bella, she's fine. I was going to ask if you wanted to bring her in here and try laying her in one of the cribs?" Rose looked upset about something but Bella couldn't tell what was wrong.
"No, I don't want to chance her waking up Ethan and Emily. Or Emmett. I'm so sorry Rose, we'll try to keep her quiet." Bella felt her cheeks turning pink.
"Oh please Bella. It's not like mine have never kept anyone awake. I'm just trying to help. We all are." Rose reached out and gave her a quick hug.
"I know Rose, and I appreciate it. She's with her hero right now. I swear, it doesn't matter what age, that man knows exactly what buttons to push, well, except for tonight obviously." Bella laughed lightly with Rose.
"I know right? You should see him with the elderly neighbor next door. She knows exactly who to call whenever something needs to be fixed. I think he just sends someone from his company there now, because the old woman's flirting has gotten so bad." Rose reached over to take Bella's hand. "He really loves you though. It's nice to see the old Edward again."
Giving her new friend a hug, Rose disappeared through the same door she came through and closed it softly, indicating to Bella that her family was definitely already asleep. Squaring her shoulders, Bella opened the door that led back to Edward's bedroom.
"Geez, Edward, are you pinching her or what?" Bella laughed lightly as she closed the bathroom door behind her.
"I don't know Bella, I hope she's ok." Edward looked concerned.
Climbing onto the bed, Bella crawled toward Edward's side. She shifted Tansy's makeshift bed in the middle and sat next to Edward to put her hand on her daughter's back.
"You know, even with crying jags like this, I still wouldn't trade her for anything. I would still never wish her away or think that I should not have had her. She's everything to me Edward." Bella put one arm around Edward and hugged him close.
"Of course she is." He kissed the top of Bella's head and then the top of Tansy's. "Just as you are now everything to me Bella."
Looking into his bright green eyes, Bella could see that they held nothing but desire. She noticed that Edward's breath hitched slightly, almost as if afraid to say something.
"What was it like? I mean, when you were pregnant with her? What was it like? If you don't mind me asking?" Edward seemed embarrassed as the words tumbled from his mouth in a rush and he had to clarify.
"I don't mind you asking at all. I know a lot of women complain. I can only speak for myself when I say I felt great. I had no morning sickness and my ankles only got swollen toward the very end. I only felt uncomfortable when I realized that she dropped down so far that I could no longer close my legs. As far as the birth goes, I talked it over with both My OB doctor and Jacob. I really wanted a natural birth. I don't have a very high tolerance for pain, but honestly, the pain I did have was worth it." Bella looked over at Edward as she realized that his breathing had gotten quieter when she mentioned Jacob's name.
"You had her naturally then? Nothing at all for the pain?" Edward looked suitably impressed.
"It's called natural childbirth. I did have a midwife there though. Don't put me on a pedestal Edward. I'm not into masochism. It hurt. A lot. All I am saying was it was worth the pain. I just had to keep thinking to myself that there was a goal and with each contraction I was closer. It was funny, looking back at it now; Alice was the only one that stayed with me through the whole birth. I didn't want anyone else in the room. Jacob and the midwife both were annoying so I had to keep asking them to leave. Jake did come in at the very end to cut the cord." Now it was Bella's turn to be embarrassed as she remembered that very important detail and how she remembered it as a mere afterthought.
"Why on Earth wouldn't he want to be there for her entire birth?" Edward sat up and reached for Tansy, snuggling her against his shoulder as she cried. The thought that someone out there wouldn't want to be there to welcome her into the world sickened him.
"To be fair, it was me. I didn't want him in the room. I knew he was there and at the time that was enough. I just found his presence annoying during the actual birth. It was like he thought he knew what was best for me. I was sweating and he was turning up the heat in the room. I was pushing and he was offering me ice chips. Little things like that. I was being stupid really. It's just that every so often, he would come in and ask if I had her yet, clearly if he would have been paying attention he would have seen that I didn't. At one point he asked the midwife if I was done yet! He just kept asking truly insensitive questions at all the wrong times. I asked the midwife to stay out of the room as well. She only came in to check me every so often. Alice stayed through it all though." Bella laughed lightly at her memory.
"Natural childbirth hint #1, if you are going to go through labor, have someone there who can make you laugh. It's strange that I use to think how was I going to get through it, because I really had no clue. My body seemed to know exactly what to do, so I just went with what it was saying. Does that make sense to you?" Bella looked at him and smiled as she held her arms out for her daughter.
"Yeah, Carlisle mentions stuff like that all the time. Like with faith healing and just willing something to be better." Edward paused as he shifted and leaned against the headboard, handing Tansy over to Bella's outstretched arms. "Are you scared for her Bella?"
Edward whispered his question as if he were afraid to actually say it out loud. Instantly regretting the empty feeling in his arms, he reached out and drew both mother and daughter close to his chest.
"I'm scared to death Edward." Bella's whispered words shook with emotion. "If I lose her, I don't know how I would find the strength to go on. Knowing that she should be there with me but she's not. Natural, painful childbirth I can handle, living without her? Uh uh, I couldn't handle that at all. I'm just not that strong." Bella's heart broke just thinking about it and she was grateful for the strength of Edward's arms around them as she shuddered with the sadness of her thoughts.
"Well, it doesn't matter because she's going to do fine. We are all going to help her through this. She's got my whole family wrapped around those tiny fingers. Not to mention she has quite a set of lungs!" Edward removed his arm from Bella and stroked Tansy's small clenched fist as she grabbed a tiny fistful of Bella's shirt.
At some time during the seriousness of their talk, Tansy's cries became interspersed with gulps of air as she finally began to settle down and quiet.
"Do you want to try laying her down?" Edward whispered.
"Sure, scootch over." Bella gently moved Tansy to the middle of the bed and placed the pillows around her again. She looked over at the clock and groaned when she saw that it was now well past 1am. Time seemed to be chasing them all weekend and she realized that their time together was winding down. One more day and then it was back to the grind.
With Tansy secure in the middle of the bed, Edward stretched out on the side opposite Bella, so that the baby lay between them. Propping their heads up on bent arms, they both reached out the other arm to each lay a hand on the now sleeping infant. Edward couldn't resist touching her soft curls as Bella rubbed her back slowly. Every so often Tansy would let out a drawn out "mmmmm" which made Edward laugh and tell Bella that she was definitely her daughter.
"Well, if talking in her sleep is the worst thing, then I'm ok with that." Bella laughed gently.
"Bella, when is her next doctor appointment?" Edward asked.
"Next week. I hope she's ok then. She should be. I know both Emily and Ethan outweigh her now. I asked Rose about it the other night and she got upset at me. That Ethan man, I swear Rose must be taking steroids! He's a little bruiser. It's no wonder Tansy gets nervous around him. I really want to finish the room tomorrow so that I'll have the time to chill for a bit before I start on another project. Plus, I still don't know exactly when she'll be cleared for surgery and I'll need that time off as well." Bella sighed deeply as the overwhelming feeling threatened to take over. Edward recognized her distress immediately.
"Bella, relax. Right now, all you have to worry about is getting some sleep, okay? You're safe here, you both are." Edward motioned with his eyes to the small bundle between them.
Smiling, Bella leaned across her daughter to give Edward a kiss. With a quick glance toward her daughter to make sure she was covered, Bella tucked one arm back under her head and placed the other on top of where Edward's now lay, gently on Tansy's back.
A mere few hours later, Edward groaned as he heard the light tapping on the door. He dared to open one eye to see if either Bella or the baby were awake next to him. From what he could see, neither one was. He heard a mumble from Bella and a returning quieter mumble from Tansy and realized that they were talking to each other in their sleep. Smiling through his sleepiness, he got up and answered the door, facing a way too chipper Alice.
"Good morning Alice." He said sleepily as he tried unsuccessfully to hide a yawn.
"Geez, why are you all still asleep?" Whispered Alice, stepping over to the bed as Jasper came into the room.
"Alice, we just went to sleep a few hours ago. She was a bear to put down last night. I should say this morning." Edward stumbled back to the bed and lay back down, too tired to even argue with her.
"Yeah, we heard her carrying on. Dad even left early for work, saying something about sleeping in one of the on call rooms. He'll be back later but he had a full schedule today so he needed to sleep." Jasper smiled as Edward looked horrified at the thought that his father might be upset enough to leave his own house.
"Was he mad?" Edward asked, glancing to see if Bella had heard Jasper's remarks.
"Of course not! He was actually laughing about it. I wouldn't have even known if he didn't need me to move my car so he could get his out of the driveway. We were almost asleep when he woke us up to get my keys." Jasper smiled at his younger brother. "Don't worry little brother, her crying didn't anyone a bit. Besides, it's not like the twins haven't chased him out on occasion when he's had a full schedule."
"All the same, let's not mention to Bella about Dad leaving early. I don't want her upset thinking that Tansy isn't welcome here." Edward rubbed his face, trying to wake himself up.
The three awake adults nodded in silent agreement as Edward yawned, prompting Jasper to nudge Alice.
"Oh, why are we here?" Alice snapped her fingers as she felt Jasper nudge her to finish their little visit so Edward could get back to sleep. "I'm sorry to bother you Edward, I just wanted to give Bella this new outfit for Tansy. I'll leave it on the chair and let you get back to sleep."
Alice carefully arranged the little outfit on the exact chair Edward and Bella had slept in the previous night. Sighing, Jasper reached out for her.
"Come on Alice, let's let them get some sleep. Although how he sleeps with Tansy and her momma talking like that I'll never know." Jasper pulled Alice into the hallway and shut the door quietly.
Laughing, Edward crawled back into bed to finish his sleep. He couldn't decide which was more amusing to him, the nonsensical conversation being carried on right in front of him or the fact that he could still hear Alice's way to chipper voice as it faded away down the hall.
"I keep forgetting that you guys aren't use to it." Alice smiled up at Jasper as he closed Edward's bedroom door behind them. She paused her chatter briefly enough to stand on tiptoe for a quick kiss. As she let Jasper lead her downstairs to the kitchen, she kept up a steady stream of chatter, pausing only long enough to hear Jasper's responses.
As they sat at the kitchen counter waiting for the coffee to perk, Alice started asking Jasper questions about his childhood. Feeling a little lost, she specifically zeroed in on what it was like to have 2 younger siblings. Jasper laughed before answering.
"Honestly? I remember it was hectic. I was only 2 years old when they were born, so I don't ever remember being an only child. I do remember that we always seemed to be kept busy. All my childhood memories are tangled up in the web of the fact that there were 3 of us. It was never Jasper and his younger brothers, it was always the Cullen boys. We were so close it was almost like being triplets, we may as well have been. I didn't mind it though, they've always been there for me when the chips were down. I mean, they're decent guys. Sure we give each other grief over the little stuff, but anytime I have ever needed them, they were there for me." Jasper shrugged as he made his way to the pot and began pouring the coffee. Handing a cup to Alice, he raised an eyebrow, knowing she would catch on to his unspoken question. She did, and began answering it after only a moment's hesitation.
"I never had any siblings. Bella has been my only family for a long time now. We've spent holidays together and everything." Alice played it off as if it didn't bother her, changing the subject with her next question. "So, what do you make of Bella and Edward?" Alice tried to be nonchalant as she drank her coffee.
"I think they're good for each other. Edward has trust issues. I am amazed that he warmed up to Bella as fast as he did. Usually it takes him much longer to feel comfortable with someone. His last girlfriend never wanted anything to do with us as a family. She made that clear to us too. It drove our parents crazy, she was all sweet and sugary when we were all together but then behind our backs she would tell Edward that Emmett's presence made her uncomfortable or that my parents looked down on her and were snobs. Crazy crap like that. She used Edward for his money and what she could get out of him. Even after they broke up, he stayed distant from us all for awhile. It's nice to have him back, even with the less than ideal circumstance." Jasper shook his head.
"You mean Tansy?" Alice's radar went up instantly and she cocked her head to one side, preparing for a battle. Exactly what was Jasper implying?
"I mean, given Bella's situation with Tansy. It's less than ideal to start a relationship under that stressful of a situation. I mean, are they attracted to each other for real or for the safety of the other person? Don't get me wrong Alice. I love Bella like a sister already and Tansy just as much as Emily and Ethan. I'd like to personally believe that they are together because they truly fell in love and not because Bella needs a crutch and Edward has a strange need to look after someone."
Alice nodded as she realized what he was saying was true. Noticing the now empty coffee cup she held, she put it down in front of her and shook her head when Jasper asked if she wanted another cup.
"I'd better not, I'm jittery enough as it is." Alice replied, swinging her legs back and forth as she swung on the kitchen stool.
"Sweetheart? You're jittery whether you've had coffee or not." Jasper walked over to Alice and stopped her legs from swinging as he easily picked her up and placed her on the counter, effectively bring her sitting level up to his height, although he still had to bend down slightly. Moving the stool aside, he planted himself firmly between Alice's legs. "I promise you this Alice, I will be there to help the three of them with this and please believe me when I say that I am hoping this will work out right for all of them."
Seeing the truth in his eyes more than his words, Alice placed her forehead against Jasper's chest and shook her head sadly from side to side.
"I love you Jasper." Alice said, and let her shoulder's slump down as she fell limp against his chest.
"Why do I get the feeling that isn't a good thing from where you stand, or sit?" Jasper moved his hand to tilt up her chin, seeing the hurt in her eyes. "What's wrong baby?"
"It's just that I have no reference for love like you do. I mean, look at your parents. Total devotion. My parents? I have no idea. Did they even love each other? I see Emmett and Rose, and ask myself why Jake couldn't be more like that for Bella. Let's face it, from my point of view the only relationships that truly work out are the ones found in the romance book that Bella tries to pretend she doesn't read." Alice kept her gaze locked on Jasper's eyes. "I just never thought I would feel like this. I mean, is this how I am supposed to feel?"
"How is that Alice?" Jasper's eyes never faltered, his gaze every bit as intense as Alice's.
"Consumed." Alice answered easily, and then continued when she realized that she could. "Overwhelmed." She held up her hand to softly touch Jasper's cheek.
"I love you too Alice." Jasper smiled as he turned his head and kissed her palm, giving it a playful little lick as their bubble was intruded on.
"Ugh, why don't you two go back to bed and do that?" Emmett arrived in the kitchen carrying Ethan and went right for the coffeepot. "Did anyone else not sleep last night? Man, that chick's got a set of lungs on her! You better get used to it son, because it doesn't get any easier." Emmett said as he easily brought Ethan up higher into his arm.
"Who do you mean by chick? Rose, Emily, or Tansy? I know you don't mean Bella because she doesn't talk unless she's asleep. That was too funny, the two of them were on the bed and I swear Tansy and Bella were talking to each other in their sleep." Jasper reached out to take Ethan so Emmett could make a cup of coffee.
"Thanks bro. Yeah, it was definitely Tansy. Rose went in and offered to help, but she kept on and on. No wonder they're still asleep." Emmett yawned as Esme came into the kitchen and went right for the coffeepot, still in her pajamas.
"Thank you to whoever made the coffee." Esme quickly reached out for the cup Emmett handed her.
"No problem Esme. Jasper and I are apparently the early risers of the group." Alice smiled as she and Jasper continued to play with his nephew.
"Hmmm." Esme said no more words as she sat easily at the counter next to them. "You know Alice, I hope Bella realizes that the room doesn't need to be finished today. We aren't chasing her away. I speak for everyone in my family when I say that you three are more than welcome to stay longer if necessary." Esme reached over to pat Alice's knee affectionately and Alice simply beamed.
"Thanks so much Esme! I know Bella is anxious to finish, but only because she wants to see it done and not because she wants to leave or anything like that. Seriously, this weekend has been like a vacation for us and you have no idea how much everyone's help has been appreciated." Alice scooted herself off the counter to give Esme a quick hug before settling back on the stool next to her.
"Are all Edward's bedroom occupants still asleep?" Esme asked as she righted herself from Alice's embrace.
"Yeah. Edward was crawling back into the bed as we shut the door so I don't think we will hear from them anytime soon." Alice swung her head as she heard a soft whimper through the doorway.
"Guess again Alice." Edward sleepily strolled through the door carrying Tansy in one arm and the outfit and a diaper in another.