Chapter 8: What happens in Las Noches, stays in Las Noches.
You guys know, Las Noches is just like Las Vegas. Pretty artificial, bunch of light everywhere, and pretty much a desert on the outside.
Now, when you visit this place, you'll be surprised what goes on in "Lord-Aizen's-Amazingly-Awesome-Kingdom."
First of all, you would expect the place to be pretty lame and boring. But truth be told, Lord Aizen is one sly dog.
He's got Harribel as bartender on the Espada VIP Club. The Tercera Espada is one helluva bartender! She's got Vodka, champagne, beer, wine, and the Las Noches specialty, Tequila. Viva Las Noches!
Secondly, the Taichou-level Shinigami is pretty good with the ladies, as you might have noticed. He brings in about twenty human woman to keep his precious "children" busy, if ya know what I mean. I mean, come on, ya got to pity those idiots! The only female Espada is Harribel, and she isn't very fond of the opposite sex…
Anyhow, Aizen's also got the Quinta Espada, Nnoitra Jiruga, as the official Dj of Hueco Mundo. The maniac may be a sexist fool, but he's pretty good with his hands…not in that way!
Ahem.
Back to the topic at hand, Aizen, been the party animal he secretly is, has Grimmjow Jaegerjacks, and Starrk as the dancers for the party.
Since both Espada aren't very fond of dancing, he gives them special privileges (like sneaking off into the World of The Living, or bugging the Shinigami) in an exchange for their…er, "talents."
Yep.
If you're the perverted, sick-minded pervert, you might have guesses right.
They strip-dance.
And Ohhhhh boy, do they have customers!
Heh, another thing you might be surprised (or shocked into a coma) at is that Ulquiorra, the slender, raven-haired guy, is actually a pretty good singer.
He, along with the background vocals of Nelliel Tu, sing all night to the energetic vibe of the club.
Tight, huh?
Hmm, ah, yes.
Old man Barragan and Szayel Aporro are kind of the stoners in this place.
Big time stoners.
But you probably already knew this.
So I'll tell you about Arroniero…hn.
Never mind. It will totally gross you out…I mean, come on, who assigns the bastard as the chef?
Ugh. Bad memories right there.
Poor Yammy had a horrible case of diarrhea last month 'cause of the Novena Espada…
Well, in case you plan to pay the crazy-ass bastards a visit, you might want to bring pepper spray with you, a pair of tonfas, a few drugs, just in case you have to drug someone *cough* Szayel! *cough* and, well, your survival instincts.
So, guys.
What happens in Las Noches, stays in Las Noches.