Chapter 5
Decode
16 weeks…
Two weeks seemed to pass uneventfully. Renesmee had moved into Jacob's apartment, although with her work, it's mostly just a place for her to sleep. Renesmee and Jacob's relationship started growing slightly, although still on the rocks.
The sixteenth week mark came around, and Renesmee and Jacob found each other sitting in the waiting area of the Gynecology floor of the clinic once again. Jacob wondered why it was so awkward between them, when they had had slept together; for Christ's sake, they're going to have a baby together.
And yet, they could barely make eye contact.
"Cullen?" The nurse called. Renesmee collected her purse, and Jacob followed her to the nurse. They walked down the familiar hall, and into one of the many rooms.
"Dr. Montgomery will be with you shortly," The nurse smiled, leaving the room.
Which once again, left the couple in silence.
"Good afternoon," Montgomery smiled, as she walked into the room. "Renesmee, how are you feeling today?" She looked up from the folder in her hands, and smiled at Renesmee.
"Well, the nausea's almost gone completely. Although, my breasts are still tender, my nose is congested…I definitely feel pregnant now." Renesmee laughed slightly, and placed a hand over her abdomen, which, if you looked closely enough, was beginning to pop out more.
Montgomery chuckled lightly. "Those are all good signs, Dr. Cullen." She set the folder down.
"Are you ready to see your baby?"
Renesmee nodded, smiling. "I've been looking forward to this for two weeks,"
"Well, let's get started."
The lights were switched off, and the equipment was promptly set up. A thin layer of cold oil was rubbed onto Renesmee's stomach, and Montgomery took the transducer in hand and began passing it over her patient's stomach, trying to get an image of the baby. The hand-held instrument was passed over a couple of times before a fuzzy black and white image appeared on the screen.
The parents-to-be started at the screen in wonder, as they picked out the image of their child.
"See this?" The OB pointed at a little flashing speck on the screen. "That's the baby's heartbeat."
As before, Jacob froze up, his gaze fixed upon the rapidly beating heart of his child. Emotions that he hadn't felt in a long time (excluding the last two weeks) welled in his body, and it took all effort for him to prevent these feelings from breaking surface in front of Renesmee and Dr. Montgomery. Renesmee gasped at the sight of her child, and subconsciously grasped her partner's hand in her own. His eyes widened, and glanced down at the pale hand in his darkly tan one for a moment, before his attention turned back to the baby on the screen.
With her free hand on the screen, Montgomery pointed out the rest of the baby.
"Here's the head," She circled the larger part of the baby. "And this is the spine," Her fingers trailed a line of what appeared to be pearls.
"Here's a leg…and a hand…"
"It kind of looks like he's…waving," Renesmee smiled.
"So it does," Montgomery smiled.
"Is it too early to tell the sex?" Jacob asked, wondering if he would have a son.
Montgomery moved the transducer over a little bit, and clucked her tongue.
"It looks like it's a bit early to tell; but around twenty weeks, we should get a better picture, and we should be able to tell then." She printed off the picture, and turned off the machine, handing Renesmee a paper towel to wipe off the oil.
"Well, everything looks perfect, baby's doing great," Montgomery smiled, content.
"I will see you two in a month."
xXx
"So, where's the picture?" Alex asked, as Renesmee walked into the locker room. A few of their other friends turned, and crowded around Alex and Renesmee, anxious to see their coworkers ultrasound picture.
Laughing, and shaking her head, Renesmee reached into her purse, and held the picture out for her coworkers.
"So, am I getting a niece, or a nephew?" Alex asked, as the picture was being passed around.
"Too early to tell," Renesmee said, as sighs of disappointment were spread around the room.
"But, we'll find out at my next appointment."
"We do not have time to look at sonogram pictures, we have work to do," King said, walking into the locker room. She stood firm, crossing her arms, and narrowing her eyes at each of the interns.
Quickly, the picture made it back to Renesmee, and she put it back in her purse.
"Go start your rounds," She instructed. Renesmee quickly put her purse in her locker, and started to get ready.
"Except you," She narrowed her eyes at Renesmee. "We need to talk about this pregnancy of yours, Dr. Cullen."
Renesmee started knotting her hair into a bun. "Yes, Dr. King?"
"First, you need to get rest. Your shift ends at eleven, no ifs-ands-or-buts. You are no longer responsible for taking patients to X-ray, and you cannot be in the CT, CAT scan, or MRI rooms. Your leave starts at thirty-six weeks, and will end when that child is six weeks old. Understand?"
Renesmee nodded. "Yes, ma'am."
"Good. Now, get changed, and start your rounds. You have a surgery to scrub into today."
King left, and Renesmee quickly changed, knowing that today would be a long day. She got through her rounds, grabbed a quick bag of chips, and headed into surgery—her first cardiac on a 6-month old, fixing a congenital heart defect.
"Dr. Cullen," The attending, Dr. Fioni, smiled, as the two women scrubbed in.
"Dr. Fioni," Renesmee nodded.
"Big day today," Fioni commented.
"Yeah," Renesmee nodded.
"You ready?" Fioni dried her hands. "Big surgery, and on such a little body."
"I'm…assisting?" Renesmee asked, shocked.
"I thought you knew, Dr. Cullen." Fioni laughed. "But, are you sure you can handle it?" Her eyes drifted to the small bump Renesmee held, but quickly looked back into the intern's face.
"Of course," Renesmee smiled. "Just because I'm pregnant, doesn't mean I won't be able to focus on work."
"Good," Fioni smiled. "Let's get started."
The two surgeons walked out of the scrub room, and into the O.R. The baby was being prepped for surgery, although she was so small, she looked out of place in the large room. Scrub nurses prepped the surgeons, and soon, Renesmee was holding the scalpel against the fragile chest of an infant.
"Great, great," Fioni commented, guiding Renesmee. "Now, we need to crack the chest,"
She instructed Renesmee, helping her through the demanding open-heart surgery. In the middle of the operation, the heart monitor started going off the charts; the situation became critical.
"Pericardium's filling with blood," Renesmee said, trying to keep her voice even.
Fioni shouted instructions, and the two surgeons tried to fix the problem; the bleeding was too much. Her heart was beginning to lose function, and they couldn't save it. Soon, the monitor flat lined. She was gone.
"Call it, Cullen," Dr. Fioni said.
Renesmee shook her head, trying to fight tears; she couldn't help, but think of the baby she was carrying.
"Dr. Cullen," Fioni said, raising her voice.
"Dr. Cullen," Fioni said, raising her voice.
"Time of death," Renesmee took in a deep, shaky breath. "Three seventeen, May third, two-thousand fourteen."
xXx
Renesmee was in tears when she arrived back at Jacob's apartment—her apartment, now. Sitting in her car, she wiped at the tears, trying to calm herself. People die everyday, she's seen babies die before, without this kind of reaction. It seemed now that everything made her cry—a diaper commercial, a mother playing with her child at the park, hell, a song on the radio would make her cry.
But that baby today, that sweet little girl…that was the worst. She placed her hands over her abdomen, and leaned against the driver's seat. If she couldn't keep a six month old alive during a simple procedure, how would she be able to keep her own child safe, even while he was still inside of her? Anything could happen between the sixteenth week and birth—she could go into early labor, as soon as the 20th week. He could develop birth defects…spina bifida, or a heart defect could develop.
She pulled out the sonogram picture that she had stuffed into her purse. She ran a finger over the baby's spine, circled the heart. Truly, he was the picture of health. She smiled, as she looked at the picture. She still couldn't believe that that was her child, that she would be a mother.
She put the picture back in her purse, drying her tears. Taking a deep breath, she got out of her car, and into the apartment. She found Jacob sitting on the couch, watching some late-night show, eating fruit loops.
"Your home early," he commented, as she dumped her coat and purse on the kitchen table.
"Unless I'm paged, King said if she saw me working past eleven she'd have my head." Renesmee sat on the couch a few inches from Jacob.
"You look like you had a rough day," He commented, seeing the tear stains on Renesmee's cheeks.
She shook her head. "I got to assist on a open-heart surgery. Fioni and I were fixing a congenital heart defect on a six-month old. It was…God, it was amazing." She closed her eyes, taking a content sigh.
"Until blood started filling the pericardial sac."
"The…?" Jacob furrowed his eyebrows, but knew whatever it was, it was bad.
"There's a very fragile sac that surrounds your heart, protects it. When it fills with blood, your heart begins to lose function. If it fills with too much blood, your heart stops. There's a very small window of time to drain the blood, before it's too late."
Jacob nodded. "You lost her, didn't you?"
She nodded. "We tried to drain it, but it was filling with blood too fast. I called it, and had to tell her parents. She was their miracle child, Jacob, and I had to be the one to tell them. You know how guilty I felt…how guilty I feel?" She felt hot tears sting the back of her eyes, and a few escape.
"It's not your fault," Jacob said, wrapping an arm around Renesmee. "It just…happens."
"I know that," Renesmee wiped at her eyes. "I see it every day. It just isn't fair that babies are dying. I became a pediatric surgeon so I could save children's lives, not watch them die." She took in a deep breath.
"What if that was our baby, lying on that table?"
"But it's not," Jacob said. "He's healthy, and he's safe." He placed a hand over her abdomen.
Renesmee smiled, and placed her hand over his. "Thanks."
Neither of them knew it at that moment, but the touch of their hands sent little sparks of electricity done their spines. They each felt something for each other, although they weren't sure if the other felt the same.
They were falling in love.