Hello! I'm alive, well my computer is. After getting assigned about 5 different essay's within the same week my mom got my computer fixed unable to stand the fact that I was always on hers. Funny how that works. Anyways, this chapter isn't anything special just a fill in I guess, kind of like the last chapter, it might be importaint... I don't really know though Im more looking forward to what's happening in the next chapter :)

"Myoga, we've been over this a million times" I sighed, running my hands through my hair very much wanting to just rip it out to ease my frustration. I glanced at the clock, 6 A.M great we've been talking for what, five, six hours already.

"Kagome, this is important," he scolded in a very fatherly like manner, frowning at my lack of interest.

"It's been what, over a month come on Myoga, if they were so concerned about it they would have had a meeting within the week. Besides, I screwed up, so technically they're in the right to request my powers taken."

Myoga's frown deepened obviously displeased with my train of thought.

He just doesn't get it.

I'm tired of this.

I'm tired of the demon hunting, the purification, and the death, it sickens me.

Yes, it's good defense but it doesn't feel good. It… it's not like your just watching someone die, you're not just killing someone. You feel it, their fear as it rises eventually taking over body and mind. You feel their heart beating rapidly and their fatal attempts to breathe as your power blasts through them. You feel the last breath, the last heartbeat before they go limp, and you feel the nothingness as their body turns to ash.

You die with them…

You don't just have to watch them die, watch the light leave their eyes you make a connection with them an unbreakable connection.

It never goes away there is a special place in your heart, your soul, in your mind where they live. Where those feelings live, it's like a time machine.

At random, it will pull you back into the past and you will see them remember their name, the expression they wore, possibly them starring at you in horror, in disgust, or their eyes pleading, begging you to answer them one simple question: what the hell is happening to me?

All possible and yet at the same time it's more than that because it's true.

It's fact.

Once their feelings rise up within for whatever reason you relive the moment. You go into a world outside of reality where nothing exists but them and you and the feeling of death that fills the air pouring into your lungs, choking you. Doing everything in its power to make you wish you could just die… just like them.

It's disgusting.

Talking about it doesn't help; it doesn't do anything but make it all worse. The only way to get over it is to move on, to forget.

Some priestesses go crazy after purifying demons, they can't escape the feeling, and it sickens them to the point of insanity. It's like being trapped in the past, instead of random visits you never leave, it's one after another it just never ends.

Others in a way grow immune to it. They get to a point to where the feelings don't bother them. It becomes such a part of them that it doesn't even matter to them anymore. They just don't care.

Honestly, I would rather go insane from it than stop caring. At least if it drives me to the point of insanity it means that I care, maybe too much, but I would rather still care.

"Kagome, you're obviously not thinking! How can you say such a thing you need your powers! How else do you plan on facing Naraku?"

I sighed, shaking my head.

I will not strangle Myoga I will not strangle Myoga.

"You haven't seen or heard anything about Naraku for months now. We have no idea where he is, so really, until we do it's not a problem. For all we know he could disappear for the rest of my life."

"Then show up and torture you're children."

Gee, way to reassure someone Myoga.

"What am I supposed to do? I can't do anything until I find him. Besides, purifying Naraku, that's insane! It'd be easier to lock him up in jail."

Besides I don't think that I could live with myself if I ever purified Naraku…

"Then why don't we try that."

Ugh, Myoga is so frustrating sometimes. Not everything is as easy as he thinks.

"Okay then, you find the proof. I have looked over those cases a million times and there is no evidence connecting Naraku or anyone who knows Naraku to them. All we really know is that it was him but my word isn't enough considering my family history. So in a sense that's just as insane as purifying him and I'd really rather not purify him." I was yelling at the top of my lungs, breathing hard, and I am more than sure that my face was red from anger. It's fucking 6:10 in the morning, I haven't gotten any sleep and I haven't had anything to eat. To make it all better I'm not even ready for school.

"If you're not going to purify the bastard then what choice do you have? You have to get him somehow Kagome."

"What am I supposed to do? Tell me Myoga, what the hell do you want me to do about it right now!"

My hair whipped around my face wildly and I knew that the conversation had gone too far. Closing my eyes, I focused on breathing until everything went still.

Myoga was staring at me in pure shock, maybe I should have my powers taken away.

"You should leave." I muttered not meeting his gaze, how could I.

He didn't say anything, just turned and walked away. The sound of the front door slamming assured me that he was gone.

I don't have time to ponder on what the hell just happened. I need to get ready for school.

I smiled, it's Friday, the only good thing about today so far. I hope that it will just keep getting better.

The whole thing is crazy anyways.

Kikyou, school, Naraku, the trial, all of it I don't really know when anything is going to sink in. It seems like I'm detached from my body, nothing that has or is happening really bothers me anymore. It's like I'm already becoming a zombie. Used to the way that life works. Nothing fazes me nothing really gets to me I'm starting to just get 'used' to it… I don't want to be 'used' to it.

Life is supposed to be random and fun. You're supposed to love it and hate it and want to just scream until your lungs deflate and your throat is so sore that you can't talk anymore.

But this past month or so has gone by so fast that I hardly remember anything that's happened. It's like the same old thing day after day to the point that I don't even pay attention because I'm so used to it.

Even arguing with Inuyasha has become normal. It's like we keep having the same argument over and over and over again. It just never ends.

But then again, it's not really my fault that we argue. It's his. If he wasn't so damn different and if he could be just a bit easier to understand I would be able to figure something about him out.

I don't know what role he's meant to play in this dysfunctional group we've formed and I don't want to make an enemy out of a friend, but I don't want to make a friend out of an enemy.

I can't tell which one he's going to make.

Usually I can tell friends from first meetings, like when I met Miroku, sure he was a pervert and I probably should have knocked him unconscious but I knew that he would be a valuable friend.

Inuyasha doesn't seem to tug towards the friend side, but it doesn't seem like he is against me either.

Boys, aren't they lovely?

Yeah right.

Sighing, I frowned down at my school uniform the skirt is too short for my liking. If only I were a couple sizes bigger.

Stand tall
Head and shoulders down
They don't make'm like us anymore
You failed to see that I am not your shadow
I can be more

You said the world is hard to face
I am your umbrella, Megan
But I can keep up with it's pace
If you let me go

I was running to see you down the line
What if I've built up what was mine
What if I didn't forget passion like you did

What if I find my purpose first
What if I fulfill my life's work
What if you counting on my failure made me live

I love my ringtones.

Grabbing my phone I flipped it open.

"Hello?"

"Hey Kagome"

"Oh, Kagura, what's up?"

"Just calling to let you know that Kanna and I aren't going to be at school today Dad's taking us to visit mom, but we'll still be over later. Oh, and Inuyasha is picking you up, well got to go love you, bye!"

"WHAT"

No reply.

What the hell! Kagura just hung up on me and Inuyasha is taking me to school.

Great…

Knock-knock

Double great, that's probably Inuyasha now.

Sighing I ran down the stairs, grabbed my bag, and swung the front door open only to freeze in shock.

"Hojo… what are you doing here?" Today just seems to be getting better and better, doesn't it?

Who am I kidding! Why the hell is all this shit happening, is today just not my day or something?

"Kagome, I um… I was well… can I drive you to school this morning?"

Oh hell no.

"Hojo" I muttered through clenched teeth, trying my best to smile. If I succeeded then I'm more than sure that it looked forced. Then again, I doubt anything close to a smile showed in my expression.

"I'm sorry but I already have a ride, and oh look at that. HE'S here." I emphasized the 'he' part hoping Hojo would take a hint.

I really don't want him thinking that I'm dating Inuyasha, but he thinking that I like Inuyasha couldn't hurt. It's not like its true, and he might actually back off. I hope.

"Inuyasha" I beamed, slamming my door and shoving past Hojo.

"Um, hi, don't you seem a little too happy to see me." He muttered, looking from Hojo to me and back again.

I elbowed him in the ribs, smiling innocently "of course I'm happy to see you. Shall we go?"

Not giving him another second to open his big fat mouth and ruin my somewhat of a plan I marched over to his truck, about to open the door when a hand dashed out in front of me.

"I'll get that" Inuyasha smirked, opening the passenger door.

"Why thank you kind sir"

Laying it on a little too thick, yeah, I think so, but having an effect… I look back at Hojo, who seemed to be fuming, definitely. I smirked taking Inuyasha's outstretched hand about to climb into his truck when I was pulled back.

Hojo had me in a death grip, his hands locked tightly around my arm, holding me off to the side as if to keep me distanced from a predator.

"Kagome I can't let you go with him! He's not good for you, he doesn't respect you Kagome. You don't know what you're doing!"

"Hojo, you're hurting me now let me go before I fucking rip your balls off. If you have any" I spat venomously, trying to make him release me.

It didn't work, his grip stayed the same, and it was pissing me off.

Before I could even attempt to go through with my threat, Hojo was gone the back of Inuyasha's silver head being the only thing in sight a quiet but deadly growl the only sound that reached my ears.

"You don't fucking touch her again. Or I'll do more than rip your damn balls off."

"Inuyasha" I whispered, placing a hand on his shoulder, squeezing it as if doing so would instantly relax him. As if such a simple movement had some sort of magical power that released the body of all tension, or just stress in general.

Spinning around Inuyasha picked me up by the waist and set me down in his passenger seat, carefully examining my arm where Hojo grabbed me.

It was red, but it's not like it's going to bruise.

Finally after deciding that I was going to live he quietly shut the door and jumped into the driver's seat, starting the engine and taking off.

"You know I could have handled that" I muttered avoiding looking at him, forcing my gaze on the buildings as we sped by.

"I know, but he's been pissing me off for a long time. I had to take advantage of the moment."

I smiled to myself, glad that I wasn't the only one who found Hojo annoying.

"Here" warmth filled my lap as I stared down at a plastic container. I sent Inuyasha a questioning glance he just shrugged flicking chopsticks at me.

"I'm assuming that you haven't eaten, your stomach has been growling. You may not be able to hear it but I sure as hell can." One of his ears twitched, as if meaning to prove his point.

"Um, thanks" I muttered not hesitating to dig in. Honestly, I was starving and hell if Inuyasha wants to carry ramen in his truck then that's fine with me as long as I get some. No matter how odd it is that he would do such a thing, I mean who the hell carries cooked ramen around in their back seat. Well, besides Inuyasha that is.

Exactly, no one!

But, it's food and I'm hungry so I can overlook this weirdness, just this one though. There are other things that you just can't get around. They need to be questioned, but ramen, it's harmless… I think.

Inuyasha took notice in my sudden statue figure, "what's wrong?" he sighed, as if frustrated by the fact that I stopped eating when I was literally devouring it a second ago.

"It's not poisoned…. Is it?" I asked, poking the ramen with my chopsticks.

He starred at me for a second, mouth hanging open as if questioning my sanity, which he might just be doing.

"You… you really think that I would poison my own lunch." He muttered rolling his eyes, "I can't believe you would even ask me such a thing, do you think I'm trying to kill you or something?"

I guess the whole idea of Inuyasha trying to kill me is a bit... over the top. I mean, hell he's never tried to harm me before.

I doubt he planned on somehow tricking me into eating a thing of ramen if I had already eaten breakfast…

Wait, did he say lunch.

"I'm eating your lunch!" I shrieked

"Damn girl, keep he volume down"

"Well I'm sorry, but I wasn't aware of the fact that this was your lunch." I snapped glaring at him.

What the hell does he think he's doing giving me his food as if that's just okay when he planned on eating it?

Then again… people don't really carry ramen around in their cars for the heck of it.

"What, did you think that I just carried ramen around for no apparent reason?"

I didn't say anything to that. I just closed the practically empty container.

"Wait, you're telling me that you actually thought that, what the hell. Who carries ramen around for no reason?"

"I was wondering the same thing" I mumbled starring out the window refusing to continue this conversation.

It's not my fault that I'm not thinking straight, if Myoga hadn't shown up at like midnight or so last night wanting to talk then I'd be running off of a full night's sleep and would have already eaten, therefore I'd have some fuel to burn off. But no, my life just doesn't happen like that.

"Hey, I'm sorry for yelling, just, that's insane though I guess it's understandable. Don't worry about the fact that it was my lunch either, okay. I don't think that I'm going to die of starvation because I miss lunch." He chuckled shaking his head as if not believing that we are actually having this conversation, honestly I can't believe it either.

I laughed quietly with him, seeing the insanity of it all. Maybe I really am just a crazy teenage girl who is in way over her head and has no idea what she's doing. Maybe I should just forget about Kikyou, Naraku, and ask that my powers be taken away on my own. Maybe what I need is to be normal instead of trying so hard to live the average high school life I should just stop trying and do what needs to be done to make it happen. No more pretending…

"So, you're good now?"

I smiled, nodding in response feeling that words would ruin this sudden realization that everything's not as okay. That I'm not as happy with my life as I thought I was. But only I can change that, only I can make it better. If I say anything this moment, this truth might shatter and I'll go back to being how I was this morning, five minutes ago, thinking everything's alright, believing that I'm on top of the world and that I can handle anything on my own no matter what life throws at me.

In truth, I can't.

But that's okay and it's that feeling that I want to capture and hold prisoner that true raw feeling that everything is okay even if it's not okay.

Damn I'm one messed up crazy bitch sometimes.

"Want to do something fun?"

I looked at Inuyasha, wondering if he caught my insanity. We're already in school what the hell could be fun enough to put that mischievous smirk on his face.

"Kikyou, want to piss her off" he grinned as if he had just solved the world's greatest mystery.

Or passed his math test, either one would do I guess.

My expression mimicked his, "hell yeah!"

Okay, so there is something in the world that we can do at school and call it fun. Fun enough to make my heart pound furiously in my chest from excitement and that is one thing that more than half of the students in this whole world can't say. I mean, who gets excited over school. I mean yeah, sure, okay it can be fun but not fun like this. No nothing compares to pissing Kikyou off.

"I take it you love messing with your sister"

"You have no idea mute man" I beamed grabbing my bag ready to jump out as soon as Inuyasha parked.

"Oh, I do Kags, I do" he turned the engine off and grabbed his stuff as well opening my door before I even had a chance to reach for the handle.

"So, what's the plan?" Honestly, I have no idea what we're going to do that will drive Kikyou to the point of insanity. I mean it's not like I'm going to be hanging all over Inuyasha like a slut and he's definitely not hanging all over me.

"I think we just accomplished our mission" he grinned, a lopsided grin, nodding in Kikyou's general direction.

I looked over at her only to see my sister fuming like no other. I don't think I've ever seen her this pissed before. Who knew showing up to school with Inuyasha could be so… so effective.

I might have to do it more often.

I waved giving her my biggest smile while following Inuyasha over to our friends.

"You two look like you just conquered the world, mind to let us in on how you did it?" Bank asked scooting over for Inuyasha and me to sit.

"Kikyou" we declared in unison unable to stop smiling.

Rin, Sango, and Ayame gave me knowing looks. Obviously getting what we meant seeing that they love pissing her off just a much.

Sesshomaru appeared to not pay any attention to the conversation, too busy 'secretly' observing Rin.

I couldn't help but smile even more it's so obvious that he likes her and it's funny to see Sesshomaru suck so badly at something he should be a pro at.

Miroku, Jakotsu, Koga, and bank just shrugged seeming pleased with our answer.

So maybe today actually is going to be a good day "Hey Bitch get away from my man!"

I sighed, or maybe not. Turning around I came face to face with Kikyou and her group of sluts.

"Last time I checked he wasn't yours" I hissed.

Wow, majorly sounding like a protective girlfriend, not good.

"Listen, I don't care what he, you, or anyone else thinks he's mine. Mine only."

I was about to say something back when Kikyou did the only thing she could ever do to piss me off, majorly piss me off.

"I'm telling mom" the guys chuckled at what might have appeared to them as childish behavior, but it wasn't.

"Why so she can try and fuck him too" I spat, completely disgusted.

They're so alike. It's easy to believe that they're mother and daughter.

Kikyou grabbed a fistful of my hair and pulled as hard as she could causing me fall flat on my butt. Dusting myself off I stood up spitting on her before punching her in the nose.

"Kagome Higurashi, the principal will see you now" the lady sitting behind the desk pointed to a door in the back, sighing I slowly walked into the room, sitting down in the chair across from Mr. Nano.

"So, Higurashi, mind telling you why you're here today" he squeaked though we both know the answer to that.

"Because I beat the shit out of my sister" I muttered rolling my eyes. Like this is supposed to make me feel guilty or something.

"Please, no swearing Higurashi. Now, that is correct. Would you mind telling me why you" he paused clearing his throat "broke her nose, cracked four of her ribs, and blasted her with a spiritual blast?"

I sighed again. Why can't we just get on with this? Besides she has 20 other ribs to use, four ain't so bad.

"Because she was picking a fight and I gave her one" He seemed unpleased with my response but didn't say anything about my answer.

"Yes, well she may have picked the fight but you're not the one on their way to the hospital, now are you?"

"No, obviously she picked a fight with the wrong person" Geez can this guy get any more annoying?

"Uh huh, I see well I'm sorry to say but we can't have you on our school premises if you're going to be a threat to the students around you. So for now I will put you on three weeks suspension, and if after that you cannot control yourself then I will have no choice but to expel you. Do I make myself clear Higurashi?"

"Crystal"

"Good, now go ahead and clear out your locker, you won't need it for a while."

I was just about to stand when my music teacher (forgot her name… if she ever had one) came bursting in.

"Mr. Nano! I am fully aware of this girls actions but she has a performance tonight and if you don't let her participate then it will not only affect her grade but her classmates grades as well seeing that her whole group is graded based on their performance. She may have been irresponsible but they have not been and to fail them because of the misbehavior of one student is unacceptable. I will not allow it!" She was breathing hard hell I would be too if I said that all at once.

Mr. Nano was quiet for what seemed to be an eternity.

"Very well, Higurashi, you have the rest of the day to clean out your locker and you may report back on campus to practice and perform. But after today there will be consequences if you come to school before your three weeks is up, do I make myself clear?"

I nodded not really sure of what the hell is going on.

I followed my teacher out of the room and down the empty halls, seeing that everyone else was in class by now.

"I don't think that what you did is completely wrong Kagome. Inuyasha told me about the whole thing. Otherwise I would have had no idea that you were in the office. Next time though, try to wait until you and your sister are at home before you two get into a brawl. I'd hate to see you expelled."

"Thank you, I'll make sure to watch myself from now on" I beamed, glad to see that she wasn't scolding me in any way.

"I sure hope so" with that she headed back to her class, probably to prepare for tonight's performance.

"Kagome, there you are"

"Inuyasha, shouldn't you be in class?" I scolded playfully gently pushing him aside so that I could open my locker.

His ears dropped when he noticed that I was clearing it out.

"They didn't expel you, did they?"

"No, they didn't I just got three weeks suspension after tonight's performance."

He nodded and continued to watch me clean out my locker. It wasn't weird, it wasn't creepy, and for some odd reason I wasn't upset. Even though today hasn't exactly been what I expected, it's okay oddly enough.

"I'm sorry."

Stopping what I was doing I looked at him, completely confused. What is he sorry for, he didn't do anything wrong…

As if reading my mind Inuyasha continued "it was my idea and because of that you and Kikyou got in a fight."

I laughed, not believing this. Oh, the conversations we have are so weird.

"Inuyasha" I managed between my laughter "I don't blame you at all. Sure today may be a day straight from hell but it seems to be a pretty good day. Got to tell Hojo off beat up Kikyou and I still get to perform tonight. I would say that it's been quite interesting, wouldn't you?"

He smiled it was a small smile but still a smile.

"Yeah, I would."

Again we were greeted by silence but it was comfortable silence we don't need words and that's what makes Inuyasha okay. More okay than he was yesterday, last week, hell the first time I met him. It's all going to be okay and I have a feeling that we're going to get along great he's finally going somewhere. It doesn't exactly feel like a friend, but it's something and it's not bad. So I'm not going to question it.

"What's this?" I stopped looking back from Sango to Rin who were standing in my way.

I shifted the bowl of ramen in my hands uneasily not sure what to do with it out in the open. It's a known fact that I never actually eat lunch at school. Either way you look at it doing so costs money and well… when you have bills to pay and shit like that you can't waste it on things like buying lunch when you can just wait to go home and eat food that you've already paid for.

"This is for Inuyasha" I said, sounding more sure than I actually was.

I felt nervous hell I have a right to feel nervous. I mean the other day we were arguing over every little thing and today I'm buying him lunch. Well, more like replacing his lunch but they don't know that. Again, my gaze went from one to the other in hope to catch a glimpse of what was running through those minds of theirs.

"Oh, well then he and Miroku decided to eat out in the court yard." Rin beamed, Sango nodded in agreement and they let me pass.

What the hell was that all about… then again I don't want to know, do I?

At least their information proved useful sure enough Miroku and Inuyasha were sitting at a table in the courtyard, mindlessly blabbing about girls I bet.

"Kagome, what are you doing here?" Miroku questioned spotting me first. Though one would think that Inuyasha would have picked my sent up the second I walked through the doors and out into the court yard. Some great Inu demon he is.

"Business" I muttered sitting down next to Inuyasha and sliding the bowl of ramen over. He starred at it for a moment as if not believing what his eyes were seeing.

"Well, I guess that solves your lunch problem" Miroku chirped grinning widely as if this is the most exciting thing that's happened in the history of our existence and he gets to be the great witness.

"Thanks," Inuyasha muttered his ears lying flat against his head.

"Okay, what's wrong?" I demanded more than asked, since there's no fucking reason for him to be unhappy. Hell, the guy has food in front of him. Most guys jump at the sight of food and devour it. Not stare at it as if one small portion of food just destroyed their whole world.

Poof, gone, no more world and all because of some ramen I mean seriously, it's not going to kill him.

"It's just that whether you admit it or not I am partly responsible for the fact that you got suspended and now you bought me lunch"

"To replace your former lunch, yes" I added

"Which I willingly gave to you"

There's no winning with him, is there.

"Look, you haven't done anything wrong to me so I don't see the problem and I should have thought before devouring your lunch this morning. So the fact that you gave it to me willingly doesn't matter, the fact that I actually ate it does. So just take the damn ramen, okay!"

He sighed, "Okay, thank you"

I smiled "see that's better"

"Well Inuyasha, if you want to make it up to Kagome you could volunteer to help set up the stage. Seeing that we'll be busy practicing and Rin promised us a surprise. They're going to need all the help they can get."

Holy shit, I almost forgot that Miroku was there… hell I did forget that he was there.

"Wait… Rin is doing a 'surprise' set up for our performance tonight?"

"Yeah, Sesshomaru told her she could."

I rolled my eyes smiling of course Sesshomaru told her she could. It's Rin who's asking for crying out loud he's not going to tell her no…

He can't tell her no even if he desperately wants to he's trapped and with Rin there's no getting out. He's gone, for good.

My grin took up my whole expression "perfect" I muttered.

Yuuup. That's it.