Chapter 8-Hurt

After Eugene's first visit to the orphanage, he settled into a new routine. Instead of wandering around the castle every afternoon, searching for something to do, he usually went to the orphanage and read to the kids there for a few hours. And he liked it. That fact never ceased to amaze him, but he liked being with the kids and doing something to bring some joy into their life. He loved seeing them smile. Sometimes he thought about reading to a little girl with a certain someone's green eyes and his brown hair too.

He did not mention this to Rapunzel.

But he told her everything else about his trips there, and she would always smile and tell him how glad she was that he had found something to do that he enjoyed. She seemed relieved that he wasn't bored anymore.

He wasn't. Actually, sometimes he thought that his life couldn't be better. He'd finally said Rapunzel's phrases enough that he was starting to believe them, and with his new work he felt like he was doing something important. He and Lottie were getting along better and better all the time.

Life was good. Shockingly good, and sometimes he had to pinch himself and remind himself that this really was his life.

How had he gotten so lucky?

XxXxXxXx

Lottie thought often that she was stuck in a rut. The problem was she didn't know how to get out of it.

Maybe that wasn't entirely true. Tom would say that if she was honest about how she felt with her family that she might just find that things would improve. She wasn't sure about that. There was a reason that she told half-lies all the time. Wouldn't Mama be upset if she told her that she felt like she was invisible now that Rapunzel was here? Wouldn't Papa be upset on Mama's behalf and tell her that a princess never complained?

No, she decided. She couldn't do it.

So she remained in her rut. She continued to bury her feelings deep down inside her. Her birthday was coming up too, and she thought that maybe she'd feel better after that. After all, a birthday was a time when she felt that she could maybe do something that she'd like to do. She dropped hints to Mama about what she'd like, and Mama would only smile demurely and say something like she'd see what she could do.

One day, toward the end of the summer, Mama came to her and asked for her help in preparing a "We present Rapunzel as our princess" ball.

Lottie said yes, of course. It was what she did.

She didn't mind most of the work, but when Mama told her that all of her cousins were coming, she groaned a little. There were two girl cousins that could be incredibly annoying. Most of the time they only would talk about clothes and other shallow things like chasing boys or other twaddle like that.

"Are Selena and Simona coming?" She couldn't help but ask Mama.

Mama smiled demurely. "Of course they are, dear. And they'll be coming early to because your Aunt Elaine wanted to help me."

Naturally. Aunt Elaine was sweet and would want to help Mama. She loved seeing her Aunt Elaine. But honestly, she didn't know how somebody as kind as Aunt Elaine could produce such annoying daughters. "I see," she said. "And I guess….you'll want me to…entertain the girls?"

"That would be an enormous help, Lottie," said Mama. "Would you mind?"

Yes! Her mind screamed. "No," she said softly. "Of course not."

But once Mama left, Lottie groaned into her pillow. What awful thing would Mama think of for her to do next?

XxXxXxXx

That afternoon was one of her days that she saw Tom, and she couldn't help but vent to him about Selena and Simona. As usual, he listened to her go on and on about how irritating they were. She may or may not have used harsher adjectives than that. "I can't stand them, Tom," she finished with a huff.

He nodded. "I gathered that," he said. "But my question is are they silly, stupid, or silly and stupid?"

She considered it. "Silly and stupid," she said. "But they can be mean sometimes too. Like nothing is ever good enough for them, and so they'll make snide little remarks. But then they'll say something that proves there's nothing but air in their heads. And they sometimes fight all the time too." She grimaced just thinking about it. "Personally," she confided. "I call them the Stupid Sisters." He suddenly coughed uncontrollably. "Are you all right?" she asked.

He pounded his chest and coughed again. "Yes, quite. And what were their names again?"

"Selena and Simona."

He laughed. "So…stupid Selena and Simona?"

"Yes, exactly," she said, but she felt that wasn't maybe entirely fair. Simona could sometimes be smart. "But it's sort of interesting because I think Simona is actually fairly intelligent."

"But she just acts dumb?"

"Precisely."

"And Selena?"

She paused to think about it. "Well….I think she's just dumb," she said, then flushed. "Does it make me a horrible person to say that?" As soon as the words came out of her mouth, she knew what he was going to say. Is it the truth? That's what he always said when she said something honest and felt bad about it.

And he didn't let her down. "Is it the truth?" he asked her.

She bit her lip. "Umm….yes?"

"Well, as long as you haven't said that to their face, I think you're safe," he said. "Besides, don't you know by now that I'll never condemn you for telling me what you really feel?"

At his words, she felt tears pricking her eyes. No one had ever said anything like that to her before, and she felt that as a princess there was nothing but condemnation from people sometimes. Over what she said, what she wore, what she did…..It never ended. "Well, you'd be the first. People seem to get their kicks out of picking on princesses."

He looked thoughtful. "Yes. They probably do. It's human nature to find the negative in anything and anybody." He looked thoughtfully at her. "But I know that must be hard on you."

Somehow hearing that from him made all the difference in the world to her. Somebody finally understood. "It is," she whispered.

"But my suggestion is to ignore their comments," he said. "Most of the time it's their problem anyway, not yours."

"I guess it is," she said slowly, thinking about what he said. "But I wish they didn't make it my problem." It always seemed to her that their snarky comments were because of something she was or wasn't doing that she should. Sometimes it was hard to tune it out.

He laughed, and then smiled at her. "They only have as much power over you as you give them, Lottie."

She blinked. That was true, and she had been giving them power over her. Every time she let their little comments bug her, she'd been handing them power. "I guess I hadn't thought of it that way," she said. "So…just ignore them." It sounded so commonsensical when he said it, but she felt like it'd be much harder to put into practice.

He nodded. "Yeah."

After that, they talked about other things, like his book, but his words stayed with her long afterward. She determined to do her best to do as he said.

XxXxXxxX

But that resolution was surely challenged when, soon after Aunt Elaine and her cousins arrived, Mama came to her with a request.

"Can you look after the twins today?"

Lottie was relieved to find that she had an excuse. Today was the afternoon that she usually met Tom. "I'm afraid not, Mama. I'm meeting a friend."

Mama sighed deeply. "But can't you take them with you?" she asked. "I'm sure they'd love to meet one of your friends."

"But Mama…." She protested. She did not want the Stupid Sister to meet Tom. Somehow she knew they'd ruin her time with him. They always did. And if that wasn't bad enough, they could possibly start flirting with him. A surge of anger rose up in her at the very thought of it.

"Please, Lottie," Mama pleaded.

"Mama…I-…" The word no formed itself on her lips, and she wanted more than anything to say it. But she couldn't. She never said no. Besides, Mama was counting on her to help out. Couldn't she just put aside what she wanted for a little while? "All right," she said slowly. "I guess I could do that."

Mama looked relieved. Probably because she didn't have to deal with them now, so she handed them to Lottie. Typical. "Thank you, Lottie! You're wonderful to do this."

Yes, I know. "It's…no trouble at all," she said faintly.

Mama gave her a kiss, and another thank you before she left the room.

Afterward, Lottie fell onto her bed. How on earth was she going to do this?

She didn't know, but a few hours later she was meeting up with Selena and Simona and heading toward Tom's house. They peppered her with questions, like what was she like, did she like clothes, did Lottie think that she would be excited to meet them. Lottie patiently answered all the questions, but she knew that she had to tell them that her friend was male. She didn't particularly want to. Both of them were chronic flirts, and they'd be all over him in a minute, she was sure.

Yet she knew she had an obligation to mention the fact. "And it's not a she, just so you know," she finally said, as they drew close to his house. "It's a he."

Selena giggled and wrapped one of her blonde curls around her finger. "Is he handsome?"

She considered. She thought of his wavy brown hair, his brown and mischievous eyes, his straight nose and jaw….

Yes, he was handsome. Very handsome. But she would never tell Selena that. "Why does that matter, Selena?" she said. "What counts is the inside."

"Oh, of course," said Selena.

Lottie thought that was the end of it, so she nodded and continued to walk. But she heard Selena and Simona talking behind her. "He's handsome, all right," Selena whispered.

"Totally," Simona whispered back. "Why else would she avoid the question?"

A pause. "A-void? What does a void have to do with anything?"

Lottie rolled her eyes and groaned quietly. Why did she have to be cursed with such stupidity? Honestly. She didn't even know how somebody as old as Selena could be such a bloody idiot.

Thankfully, Simona felt the same way. Her voice escalated. "Really, Selena, you are such an idiot sometimes. I meant, why didn't she answer the question?'

"Oh, right," Selena said. "And don't call me an idiot. It's rude."

"Then don't act like one," Simona retorted

Lottie rolled her eyes again, and tried her best to ignore them until they reached Tom's house. Soon they did, but not before Selena and Simona got into another mini-fight over stupidity. She felt like she'd love to kiss Tom's door. Finally, somebody sane. She knocked on the door. "Tom?"

She heard footsteps and he opened the door. She'd never been so glad to see him in her life. He smiled at her, and she thought about Selena's question. Is he handsome? Yes, her heart said. He was. And for the first time, all she could think about was how good-looking he was. "Lottie, it's-…." He glanced over her shoulder. "Oh, I see you brought some friends."

Friends….ha. She forced herself to smile. "Yes. These are my cousins, Selena and Simona." She gestured to Tom. "This is my friend, Tom."

She watched as Selena touched his arm- actually touched his arm! Selena's forwardness shocked her, but maybe it shouldn't. Selena was always like this when it came to men. "Tom," she purred. "I'm thrilled to meet you."

Simona put her hand on his other arm. "Me too!"

Tom blinked, and gently pulled his arms away like any gentlemen would. "Um….quite," he said politely. "Why don't you ladies come in?"

They did, and Lottie was about to follow them, but Tom caught her arm. He leaned in close to her, and Lottie's heart pounded more than it should. He whispered in her ear. "So. The Stupid Sisters, huh?"

She shook her head. "You have no idea."

He smiled and winked at her, sending her heart aflutter. He was so very handsome. Why hadn't she ever noticed before how his eyes seemed to twinkle like stars?

He walked away from her, and began to do host-like things like asking her cousins if they'd like to sit down and if they'd like something to drink. His ability to be kind to his unexpected guests endeared him even more to her. He was so nice….

"And how about you, Lottie?" he asked her.

She blinked. She lost herself in her thoughts, and now he was looking at her. "Um...tea, I guess."

He laughed. "Of course," he said, then grinned at the girls. "Lottie can't stand coffee. What would you ladies like?"

She watched as Selena actually fluttered her eyelashes at him. She looked like she'd gotten a speck of dirt in her eye. "Oh, I'd love some coffee."

"Me too!" Simona echoed. "We love coffee."

Lottie had a sudden urge to smack them. It was obvious that they were trying to make her look bad because she didn't like coffee like they did- like Tom would be more inclined to like them if they were just like him.

But all Tom did was continue to smile and prepared three cups of coffee and one cup of tea for her. He set them on the table, and joined them. "So, where are you ladies from?"

"Oh, we live not too far from here," Simona said. "Just over the border in Screlandria."

"And we're here from Rapunzel's ball," Selena told him. She laughed girlishly. "Don't you just love balls, Tom?"

He looked bemused. "I really couldn't say."

"Haven't you ever been to one?" Selena asked. "I don't see how you couldn't like balls!"

Lottie could. She couldn't think of one ball that she'd actually enjoyed. Most of her experience with balls consisted of thinking of chit-chat and trying not to mind when somebody stepped on her toes. The dressing up part could be fun, but the shoes often pinched, and the dresses laced up so tight that she couldn't breathe. Ugh. Now she was reminded of how much she did hate balls. She loved Rapunzel dearly, but she would be fine celebrating her in a different way. For instance, taking a picnic lunch by the lake. That would be fun.

"Well, I personally love balls, " she heard Selena say. "All the dressing up." She smiled flirtatiously at Tom. "The handsome men."

Oh good Lord. Selena couldn't be more obvious if she tried. She hoped that Tom would see through her nonsense.

"I agree," said Simona.

Lottie finally found her voice. "You know," she said. "I think it's time to discuss something else now, like maybe the weather. Or something."

Both of the twins looked incredulously at her. "What's so interesting about the weather?" said Selena. "It's hot, just like it is every summer. I'd much rather talk about dresses. Those at least change each year."

Tom laughed heartily. "That may be true, but that's not particularly interesting to me."

"I have an idea, Tom," Lottie said as an idea came to her. "How about your game?"

He looked over at her. "Speak?"

"Yes."

He winked at her, and she felt her heart skip a beat. Why was it that his winks and smiles made her so excited all of a sudden? "I'm not sure Selena or Simona would enjoy it…." He said.

On second thought, they probably wouldn't. Telling the truth wasn't something they'd want to do.

But they surprised her. "I'd like to play," said Selena. "I mean, if Tom made it up, I'm sure it will be good."

"Actually," Tom said. "I have a better idea. How about I tell you the story of how Lottie and I met?"

Lottie felt a laugh bubble up in her when she remembered how Tom had rescued her from the ruffians. "That's quite a story, Tom. But I'm not sure they'd want to hear that."

"Yes," Selena said. "I'd much rather-…."

Tom cut her off. "Nonsense. You all would love it." He preceded to them all the embarrassing details of how he'd rescued her from the boys, and how their friendship had progressed from there. She liked hearing it from his mouth, and she thought he said it all with a hint of fondness for her. But she noticed how bored both Selena and Serena looked. After he finished, she smiled at him. "It sounds so much exciting when you tell it, Tom. But how about we talk about maybe…the ball now?" She didn't want to, but she did want her cousins to enjoy themselves. Sort of.

Selena immediately brightened up. "Oh yes! I'm so excited about it. I have the most beautiful dress, Tom."

His eyes flicked over to Lottie. "I'm sure it is."

Now Lottie felt rather awkward and she wished she hadn't brought it up again. She didn't even know if Tom was going to the ball. How would she feel if they kept talking about a party that she couldn't go to? "You know," she said hastily. "I think we'd better be going. Mama will be expecting us for dinner soon."

She thought she saw a flicker of disappointment in Tom's eyes, but it quickly vanished. "Oh, all right," he said. "It was nice to meet you, Selena, Simona."

Selena giggled again. "Definitely!"

Simona agreed, and Lottie believed they might even have started to fawn over him again if she hadn't herded them outside.

Honestly. Being a princess was certainly not for the faint of heart.

XxXxXxXx

The next morning, Lottie woke up early. She usually did, but today she pulled her pillow over her head and groaned. Just another day of her two annoying cousins awaited her, and boring ball details on top of that.

But then a thought entered her mind and she bolted out of bed. Today was her birthday! Surely not even Selena and Simona could ruin that for her. She hummed cheerfully as she dressed and prepared for the day. Her happy mood even continued when she went down to breakfast and saw Selena and Simona sitting across from her. Luckily, both Eugene and Rapunzel were there too, and they were smiling at her.

Mama and Papa were present along with Aunt Elaine too, and they soon began to eat. Yet as the meal went on, no one mentioned her birthday at all. Her heart grew heavy, and she couldn't help but wonder what happened.

XxXxXxX

Lottie's day did not improve from there. After they finished eating, Mama asked her to help with Selena and Simona again and so she was subjected again to their nonsense. The afternoon wore on, and she still hadn't hear a happy birthday the entire day.

When it was close to dinnertime, she had to talk to Mama about it. Perhaps they were planning a surprise dinner for her? She didn't know, but she couldn't help but wonder that maybe they'd forgotten. In the midst of all the preparations for Rapunzel's ball, it had completely slipped their minds.

That was not a happy thought. She knocked on Mama's door, and let herself in. Mama was busy scribbling notes, and fiddling with RSVPS.

"Mama," she said. "I know you're busy with something, but I really need to talk to you…."

Mama sighed and rubbed her temple. "Lottie, can't it wait until tomorrow? I'm busy with details for the ball and-…"

She stared at Mama in disbelief. She was brushing her off? Unbelievable! Didn't she remember that it was her birthday? She knew what she should do now, which was say, yes of course, I'll ask again tomorrow. But she couldn't do it. This was her birthday! Her face flushed hot, and she let out the frustration that had building for weeks. "No, don't worry about it, Mama. I'm sure that Rapunzel's ball is so much more important than my birthday!"

Mama just stared at her, and Lottie instantly became aware of how rude she'd been. "I'm sorry, Mama," she said. "I just…." Her feet itched, and what she needed more than anything was to get out of there. "Excuse me."

She didn't even wait for Mama to respond; she rushed out of the room and out of palace, tears falling down her cheeks. There was only one person she wanted to see right now, and he did not live in the castle. She almost ran to Tom's house, and she knocked on the door. Come on, Tom, she thought. Please be home.

After the second knock, Tom opened the door. "Lottie! What-…." He noticed her tear-stained face, and his face grew concerned. "Are you okay?"

She choked back a sob. "No…." He wrapped his arms around her, and she buried her head in his chest and cried. But once her tears dried up, she became intensely aware of how close they were. His arms were around her waist, and one hand stroked her hair. It all felt….very intimate somehow, as if they were more than friends. Maybe they were. Surely she wouldn't get that warm feeling in her stomach if they were. She probably wouldn't enjoy his arms around her as much as she did either. But she still pulled away, cheeks hot.

Tom didn't look embarrassed at all though. He even reached a hand out to her, but it fell limply to his side. "What happened, Lottie?" he asked.

"My parents….my parents were too busy with my little sister to remember my birthday," she blubbered.

"That's awful, Lottie. I'm so sorry," he said kindly. "But if it makes you feel better, I understand what that's like."

She looked at him tearfully. See, she thought. That's why she knew she needed to see him. It seemed like no matter what happened, he always knew what to say. "You do?"

"Yes, I do," he said. "My parents have always favored my younger brother over me because…." He hesitated. "Well, just because." He abruptly cleared his throat and smiled. "Anyway. Happy birthday! So, would you like anything to drink? I could make cocoa instead of coffee to cheer you up. And I actually have a piece of pie if you'd like it."

She smiled in spite of herself. His offer was very nice. "That would be wonderful."

He smiled back at her and quickly made a cup for her and himself. He also put a piece of pie on a plate in front of her. Apple. Her favorite. Tears pricked her eyes at his kind gesture, and she started to eat it. Delicious. "You like it?" He asked her with a grin.

"I love it," she said. "Thank you."

After she finished the pie, Tom sat across from her, his gaze level. "Lottie," he said seriously. "I can't help but think that there is something else bothering you besides just your birthday."

"You're very perceptive, Tom," she said.

"Thank you," he said. Then he grinned at her. "But don't think you can avoid my question that easily."

"No," she said slowly. "I wasn't trying to avoid it…" She stopped and she decided to tell him everything. She'd told him snippets here and there, but she found herself telling all the feelings she'd had over the past few months. She told him that she loved her sister being home, but she felt like she'd been invisible to her parents since Rapunzel had returned. Rapunzel also seemed good at everything, and she couldn't help but think she wasn't really good at anything. She felt like the boring older sister that everybody depended on, while Rapunzel was the happy and light one that everyone liked more. He listened patiently. "So…" she said hesitantly when she'd finally finished. "What do you think?

"It's fairly simple, really." He leaned back in his chair and looked at her levelly. "You're jealous."

Her? Jealous? She denied it. She might feel overshadowed by her sister, but she wasn't jealous. Where was Tom getting that? "I am not."

"You are."

"No, I'm not!" she protested.

He sighed heavily and looked straight into her eyes. "Yes, Lottie, you are," he said emphatically. "But it's okay. It happens to everyone sometime or another. Sibling rivalry is as old as…." He waved his hands around. "I don't know…siblings themselves!"

"I'm not jealous," she repeated again. "I'm not! And I'm not in rivalry with her!"

"Lottie," he said. "Come on, be reasonable. Everything you told me is-…."

Suddenly, something in her snapped. She'd poured out her heart to him, and now he was telling her she was the one who was wrong? "I am being reasonable!" she argued hotly. "You're the one who isn't."

Previously he had looked at her with compassion, but now his eyes expressed annoyance. "I'm the one who's unreasonable? I'm not the one who's practically yelling."

"I am not yelling!" Okay. That had come out very loud. Maybe she was.

"Lottie! Can you hear yourself? You can deny it as much as you want, but you are. And I think that-…."

She couldn't have this conversation right now. "And I think…," she snapped. "That I don't care what you think!" She raced over to the door and pulled it open.

He followed her and took her hand. "Come on, Lottie, please. Let's-…"

She pulled her hand out of his. "Go away," she said. "I don't want to talk to you."

And then she ran back to the castle, tears streaming down her face.