(Disclaimer: The Fullmetal Alchemist Characters belong solely toHiromu Arakawa and any other Fullmetal Alchemist makers I don't know about, but Patricia Kansas and the other unknown characters I am writing about belong to me. If this disclaimer is wrong, then please do not sue me.)

KChanDreams: Edward is out of character in the chapter, but I needed to have a laugh.

Chapter 8: Not My Fault

An alarm clock rang wildly in a large room. A hand turned it off and then slipped back under the covers. Patricia, who was in her pajamas, pushed her blankets off and rubbed the sleep out of her tired eyes.

"What a weird dream," said Patricia tiredly. Patricia stepped out of her bed only to step on something soft. Patricia looked down and saw Edward, who was in a pair of pajamas that she offered, sleeping on his side with a thin blanket over him.

Patricia groaned and said, "I guess it wasn't a dream." Patricia stepped on Edward harder causing him to grunt.

"Wake up, you lazy bum," ordered Patricia. Edward pulled the covers over his head tiredly.

"Five more minutes," mumbled Edward. Patricia gave out a growl and kicked him extra hard.

"Wake up Edward!!" she screamed. Edward snapped awake. He cradled his pain pulsing side and glared at Patricia.

"You short tempered Tomboy," growled Edward. Patricia crossed her arms and said, "I'll ignore that comment, so hurry up and get ready to work." Edward nodded even though he was still clearly angry.

Patricia began to unbutton her pajama top causing Edward to blush. Edward clenched his eyes shut and screamed, "Change somewhere else!" Patricia looked back at him with her top button open and sighed.

"You being here is annoying and inconvenient," said Patricia as she began to gather her clothes.

Edward stared down at Patricia as she gathered her clothes. He didn't notice it before because of her military uniform, but Patricia had a slim figure and silk like hair. She almost resembled a Goddess.

Patricia looked back at Edward and said, "I'll change in the bathroom." Edward remained silent. Patricia waved her hand in front of Edward's face.

"Are you listening, Edward; anybody in there?"

Edward blinked a few times and said, "Compared to Winry, your chest seems a bit bigger." Patricia blushed brightly. She suddenly clenched her fist and gritted her teeth.

"Why are you staring at my chest you big pervert?!" screamed Patricia. Patricia punched Edward across the room. Edward collided into the wall and then fell flat on the ground.

Patricia grabbed Edward by the collar of his shirt. She swung her door open and immediately tossed Edward out.

"And stay out!" roared Patricia and slammed the door shut. Edward stared at the door holding his head and groaned.

"Didn't I compliment her?" Edward asked himself. He was suddenly hit behind the head. Edward groaned and looked down at his attacker, Neko who heard the whole thing through the door.

"You shouldn't look at a girl's chest, perverted boy," scolded Neko. Edward gave a pout and said, "Not my fault. She was the one prancing around the room with her pajama top half open." Neko smacked him again.

"For your own well-being, don't mention this again to Patricia or anyone else," warned Neko. Edward nodded.

Edward suddenly realized he forgot his change of clothes. He stood up and reached toward the door knob.

"Edward, sto…"

Before Neko could warn him, he opened the door revealing Patricia in only her underwear. Edward blushed at the sight. Patricia glared at Edward and pulled out her gun from her table.

"Die!" roared Patricia as she shot at Edward. Edward dodged the bullets and immediately shut the door. Lucky for Edward, the door was bullet proof. Neko shook her head at Edward and claimed that he was an idiot. Edward groaned and said, "I was stupid for thinking she was cute for a moment."

After Patricia and Edward, who had begged for his clothes, had changed clothes and seen the weather machine, which had no change, they were walking down the hall of the military base. Edward looked at Patricia and noticed her angered expression.

Edward sighed and said, "I'm sorry for looking at your chest and walking in on you." Patricia glanced at Edward and said, "Forgiven, but if you do it again or mention it again, I will pump you with bullets and the future will see you again as an artifact." Edward could clearly see how serious she was.

Edward gave a gulp and hoped to reach the cafeteria soon.