AN: Revel in my complete fic~ And the crappiness of it all~ And... I fail at cliffhangers (I'm sorry.) And, I hope I kept everything correct via my own memory and wikipedia... *sighs* Ah, for SuperSmashGirlBB's bittersweet contest. I forgot to mention that... the quote is the inspiration, and this is not a song fic.

Pairing: Dark Link/Link

It was shocking, to say the least, as Dark had assumed the other was a pacifist (preferring to talk over fight.) However, here he was, asking to be taught the basics of fighting. While Dark wouldn't have minded (as he was worried about Link getting his ass served to him), he couldn't help but wonder where this sudden interest came from.

So, being curious as a cat would've been, he asked his… lover? It was still confusing, their relationship, as he didn't know what their relationship was exactly.

He also hadn't expected Link to be embarrassed by the question, as there were legit reasons that were embarrassing (or maybe they were embarrassing, and he just didn't feel the same things others did.) "I… I just… Ike was saying that I should learn… After I walked in on—"

"Yeah, I get it." While his second personality (if he went along with what Link was calling that pervert) might've liked seeing Ike and Zelda (also known as Sheik) doing things, the original Dark (and the other personalities) didn't need any of those mental images. That was the reason he immediately interrupted Link when it sounded like the other was going to start talking about "private" things.

Though, really, they were the only ones who believed their relationship was private. Even Peach and Mario (who publically announced their relationship to the world—it had cause a lot of uproar since Peach was the queen of Germany and Mario was one of the generals of the army, but that was another story) had a more private relationship than those two. Anyone who knew Ike for more than two weeks had nearly walked in on him and Zelda (or maybe Sheik)—some had actually been unlucky enough to see some things that no one should ever see.

"It wasn't bad," Link protested, but Dark wouldn't hear it—anything involving the two was bound to be "bad". "They were only baking."

That, the image of Ike in a frilly apron, nearly broke Dark's brain. Only the fact that Link was near (and maybe he had indulged in a few fantasies) had kept his brain functioning to an extent. Still, the image was forever burned into his mind—he didn't know if he wanted to laugh at the absurdity of the image or if he wanted to cry because of the mental scarring.

Instead, he tried to change the subject before he became irreparable. "So, you wanted to know how to fight, right?" In an attempt to be nonchalant (or maybe to fill this silent room with noise—if he actually thought about his second reason, he'd realize that it wasn't silent), Dark let out a nervous laugh. Secretly, he was hoping that Link was kidding (or… maybe not as serious as Dark assumed he was.)

"Yes." A softly spoken word shattered whatever delusion Dark created for himself—he would've mourned the loss of the delusion had it not been haphazardly been made. "I'm not saying I want to know how to wield a gun, but I want to know the basics of fist fighting."

"I don't know if that's the smartest thing to do… Uh, people do often fight with weapons. I'm just saying that if you're fighting, at least bother to protect yourself with a weapon." Dark felt so… it wasn't exactly mortification nor was it horror, but he didn't like the thought of Link having to face any enemy with weapons.

"…So you're suggesting what exactly? I learn how to wield a gun?" Link sounded sarcastic (for once) and had it not been for the fact that they were standing in the middle of a deserted field (though Dark swore he felt someone spying on him), he would've immediately pestered Link about it. He, instead, started to poke Link, as if he could find a switch that did that for Link.

"Exactly! I think you should also learn how to use dagger." Dark continued to ramble on about how effective a dagger is in battle but subconsciously, he knew that Link wasn't listening to him. In fact, if he had been in Link's place, he wouldn't even been listening to himself.

"Dark, please be quiet." Link apparently couldn't take the other's words for much longer, as he was suddenly kissed (as if that would keep him quiet.) It had the desired effect, but with some (maybe) horrible side effects.

Dark's hand had a death grip on his hair (while it wasn't painful, Link didn't care for the pulling), and he could feel the other hand moving lower and lower… Suddenly, he squeaked, glaring at the other. Dark probably thought it would be hilarious to grope him—maybe it was in some morbid sense—and he was going to get revenge. Somehow.

"You shouldn't have done that," Link warned, his eyes narrowed slightly, as if that would be intimidating. It had the opposite effect, as Dark had the urge to just hug the life out of him—the blonde was really adorable when he attempted to be scary.

"Aw, aren't you adorable," Dark cooed, inwardly laughing at Link's pout—he knew that Link didn't like being associated with the word cute (or its synonyms), but it was a perfect opportunity to get in another jibe before Link could recover.

It was also amusing when Link suddenly punched his arm (quite lightly, as he would find out later)—the throbbing was enough to shut his inner self up, but it was also all that was needed to free his second side (not that he'd actually realize that.)

"So, Linky here wants it rough now~? Well, I'm sure I'm up for the challenge," the second personality (or maybe third, counting the original) murmured into Link's ear, smirking at the now-embarrassed male. Pulling the other into his embrace, he continued on, giving the blonde a detailed description of what he'd do to him.

"Dark… please be quiet, and teach me how to murder you," Link muttered, looking at the ground. Really, the change had shocked him beyond belief, but he attempted to take it in stride (in fear of the other making fun of him, or… sexually harassing him.)

It might've taken longer than Link would've liked, but he managed to get Dark to his original personality, and he was now learning how to use a gun. Dark's hand would brush his, and he would often try to correct the other's aim.

To be honest, Dark had to admit that Link was really good (considering they had started an hour ago). The only problem the blonde had was the recoil—obviously, the other wasn't used to the power of the gun's shot, so he would go flying back. They were working on it, and the problem was correcting itself at an incredible speed.

"I—" Dark paused, hearing a noise outside. Taking a loaded gun with him, he exited the shooting gallery he had crafted long ago for himself, and was shocked to see who it was.

"Hello, Dark."