Chapter Fifteen
Nunnally stared at her hands, listening to the staff rushing around as they worked to accommodate the two tributes who had been brought in. Luciano had quickly been declared dead even before he had arrived at the hospital, his tracker had given the alert before the rescue helicopters had gotten there.
Nunnally closed her eyes and ducked her head. It almost felt like failure that one of the last tributes had died, even though she was sure that Luciano would have had to be killed anyway. There was a part of her that had hoped that she would be on time but, from the sound of the report coming from the soldiers when they had first arrived, they had barely made it. She swallowed, looking up at the next rush of people.
She still remembered the slightly panicked call, just after she and Odysseus had finished their announcement to the people. Odysseus had stayed behind to keep the people under control before the news got out, leaving Nunnally to be bundled into a car and driven over to the hospital, all while clutching a phone to her ear and listening to Euphemia continue to give the report.
No one had seen the final fight between Lelouch and Luciano. The inside of the Cornucopia had been too dark and too crowded for the cameras to go in. All the people had see was Suzaku get shot and then Lelouch stumble out of the Cornucopia, bleeding from his stomach and looking completely disoriented. Euphemia had cut the call after she had reported that Lelouch had collapsed, leaving Nunnally to wait on her own. She had thought that the news had been the worst part, but the waiting was far worse. She didn't know exactly what had happened to Lelouch or Suzaku, Euphemia had been far too focused on keeping Nunnally informed that they were alive to say how they had been wounded, aside from Suzaku getting shot.
She looked up at the sound of another commotion, surprised to see Milly Ashford walking into the hospital. Nunnally tried to sink back into her wheelchair, but the guards around her made hiding useless. Milly spotted her quickly, striding over with a man that Nunnally vaguely remembered as a cameraman from the interview. The thought of doing another interview right now made Nunnally want to scream. She could play the princess for the crowds, but this was about her brother. What went on inside her family was private and something that she was not going to share, no matter how many times she was pestered about it.
When Milly couldn't be deterred, Nunnally lifted her chin, motioning for her guards to step aside. "Miss. Ashford, I don't think that-"
"This isn't about an interview." Nunnally was taken aback, both by the interruption and how serious Milly looked. She had gotten used to the cheerful Milly Ashford that could smile her way through anything, even the list of dead tributes at the end of a day of the Games. Nunnally had never thought that there would be a serious side to Milly, or at least one this serious.
Milly bowed slightly at the waist, glancing at the guards as she did so. As soon as they stepped away, Milly knelt by Nunnally's side. "This is about you and nothing else. I heard what happened to them and I'm sure no one will be as focused on you because they have Odysseus to fawn over. So, what do you need Nunnally?"
Nunnally stared at her for a moment, not quite comprehending the question. She was sure that there was some reason behind Milly's kindness, there was always something behind everyone in Pendragon. Then again, Nunnally didn't want to spend time thinking about what Milly's motivations were. She just wanted everything to be simple for once. Two of the most important people in her life were close to death and she didn't want to think about what favors she would owe in the future.
"I…I need to call my mother."
Milly frowned and rocked back on her heels, Nunnally almost regretting her words. It was a childish impulse in the first place, but she couldn't stop herself from thinking about how Marianne just needed to be told that Lelouch and Suzaku were in good hands, the best hands. That didn't stop her from wanting to reach for the one person in her family that she knew the best.
She looked up as Milly rested a hand on her shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze. "Alright. I'll see what I can do."
Milly pulled out her phone and dialed a number, speaking quickly to someone on the other end of the line. Nunnally tried to focus on her for some kind of distraction but her attention kept drifting to the rush of the hospital around her. Every time someone who looked remotely like a doctor passed she leaned forward, expecting them to come to talk to her with any kind of news only to watch them walk away. Her attention was brought firmly back to Milly as the reporter held the phone up with a smile. When Nunnally hesitated, Milly just wiggled the phone. "Go ahead."
Nunnally took it from her hands, pressing the phone against her ear. "Hello?"
"Nunnally?"
"Mother." Her voice cracked over the word, Nunnally slumping in her wheelchair. She hadn't realized how much she had needed to hear her mother's voice, especially after the hectic days she had been having. Nunnally looked up, watching Milly usher the guards and the man she had dragged with her back a few steps, giving Nunnally the illusion of privacy. She gave Milly a thankful smile before focusing on the phone call. "It's me."
"Nunnally." She heard Marianne sigh on the other end of the line. "Didn't I tell you not to get into trouble?"
"You…you've been watching me?"
"Of course I have. You've been someone that everyone has been talking about. I'm proud of you but…couldn't have you just stayed safe and kept quiet?"
"No. Mother, it was Lelouch and Suzaku. I couldn't just sit back and let other people do this."
"I know." Marianne sighed again. "I know and I would have done the same. That doesn't stop me from wishing you had laid low and it doesn't stop me from being proud of you."
Nunnally nodded, even though she knew that her mother couldn't see her. She looked up at the people that surrounded her, taking a deep breath before speaking again. "Did…did you watch the end of the Games?"
"No. Everyone was too busy watching Odysseus." Marianne was silent for a moment. Nunnally winced at the quick breath that she heard over the line. "What happened?"
"We got them out of the Games. Suzaku was shot and Lelouch...He was stabbed, Mother. Luciano got him in the end and I don't know if he'll be alright."
"Lelouch is…"
"What are we going to do without him? He's always been there and because of this he might not be." Nunnally reached up with one hand to wipe at her eyes, too far gone to be embarrassed about crying in public. "What are we going to do?"
"You stay there with him, Nunnally, and be strong."
"That's not an answer!" That answer might have been good enough for her once, but she had seen Lelouch on the recap that they kept running on the televisions in the hospital before the staff had turned off the televisions. Lelouch's shirt had been stained red and he had been so pale. Then, in the short space between Lelouch had collapsed and the helicopter had come, both he and Suzaku had been so motionless, like they were already dead. Nunnally shook her head, clinging to the phone. "That's not the answer to my question. What happens after?"
"I…I don't know, Nunnally. I'm not thinking about that."
"Why not?"
"Because I'm worried about Lelouch." Nunnally flinched when she heard the crack in her mother's voice. "I'm trying to…but I want to see him too, Nunnally. That's what I want you to do for me. I want you to be there for the both of us in case anything happens. Be there, be strong and bring whoever you can home. We'll figure out the rest later."
After days of planning and frantically trying to stay ahead of her father, Nunnally wasn't sure if she could just sit back and let the world just settle into place again. She had felt weak her entire life and, for a glorious few days, she had been strong and able to control the world. It was too heady a feeling to let go, especially when her whole world was falling apart. But her mother was only asking for a simple thing, something that Nunnally was sure that she could do. She would bring what remained home, but she wouldn't be staying for long.
She trusted Odysseus, but Schneizel was another matter entirely and then there was the next person who came and thought that they could use the Hunger Games for their own purposes, something that Nunnally was never going to let happen after today. She had to stay in Pendragon to make sure the same mistakes weren't made again. Nunnally was sure that Marianne would hate the idea, but this was the one thing that she would not back down on.
To her mother, she just smiled and said "I'll do my best."
Marianne sounded relieved by Nunnally's agreement. "Thank you. Stay close and…I'm going to try and get there as soon as possible. I'm not leaving all of you on your own.'"
"Thank you."
"Give me a while to make arrangements and call here again if something happens. Someone will get me."
"Alright mother."
Marianne hung up, Nunnally shocked by the sudden silence on the other end of the phone. She shook her head and closed the phone. Marianne was just worried, which was why she was being short, it was nothing that Nunnally had done.
She turned to look at Milly, holding out the phone. She was about to thank Milly for the favor when the reporter knelt by her side again. "Is Lady Marianne coming up?"
"As soon as she can."
"Don't worry. We'll get her here faster." Milly winked at her before walking off, the phone open again as Milly started making the calls.
Nunnally wasn't sure that they were worth all of the strings that were being pulled, but at least it got Marianne to Pendragon. She was sure that Marianne would want to see Charles buried, Nunnally remembered many stories that her mother would tell about the former emperor. From what she could remember, it sounded like Marianne had really loved Charles, despite what had happened. After knowing everything Charles had done to try and silence them, Nunnally wasn't quite sure that she could share the same sentiment, but she wasn't to Lelouch's extreme of hating their father. It would also give Odysseus a chance to ask Marianne to stay on as an adviser, which would probably make staying for Nunnally just that bit easier.
She looked over as a doctor walked toward them, her eyes widening as she realized what it meant. She pushed her chair away from the wall, the guards moving out of the way so she could go over to the doctor. If the man was surprised to see her in the waiting room alone, he showed no sign. He just looked down at her before giving her a shaky smile. "Come with me."
He walked slow enough that she could keep up and he could hold the doors open for her. The doctor led her toward the private wards, Nunnally aware of the stares and bows that followed her. She looked back up at the doctor as he cleared his throat. "Suzaku," he stumbled a bit over the name, "will be awake in a matter of hours. With Prince Lelouch, it may take a while longer."
"How much longer?"
The doctor came to a stop, leaning against the wall. "He'll be regaining consciousness in a few hours as well, but we're keeping him on a high dosage of pain medicine for a while. There was extensive damage to his abdomen and his stomach was dangerously close to rupturing, so we want to make sure he isn't moving around for a while. His recovery will take a time, but he'll make it. And that's probably the part that you wanted to hear the most."
Nunnally nodded, not sure how to react now that she knew that they would both live. She had hoped that Lelouch and Suzaku would, but she had also been preparing herself for the worst. She swallowed and looked at the door to the room they were standing by. "Can I see them?"
"For a little while." The doctor moved to open the door. "We'll be sure to alert you when they wake up."
Nunnally wheeled herself into the room, meaning to thank the doctor only to get distracted when she saw the two beds in the room. She held her breath, listening to the twin beeps of the heart monitors before letting her breath out slowly. Nunnally moved away from the door, going immediately to Lelouch's bed side to look down at him.
She had caught Lelouch sleeping before, on the odd occasions he had been exhausted enough to nap on their couch or when he had been sick. He looked nothing like that now; it looked more like death than life. Nunnally reached out for his hand only to jerk hers back. She didn't want to touch him, just in case something horrible happened. Lelouch had never been physically strong, but he had never looked so fragile, not that Nunnally could remember.
Nunnally covered her mouth to muffle the sound of her sobs, not wanting to overpower the sound of the heart monitors. They were the only things that were giving her the hope that Lelouch and Suzaku would live, all other signs were too subtle for her to see and she didn't want to stare at them and be reminded of how close she was to losing him.
She swallowed and looked away, shaking her head. "I'm sorry I wasn't fast enough. I'm so sorry. Just wake up soon. Mother is coming up to see you and I promise that she's safe. We're all safe now. So wake up and get better so we can all be together again."
The steady beep of the heart monitors was her only answer, which was enough of one for her. Nunnally sniffed, wiping her eyes. She settled back in her chair, prepared to keep watch over them until she was asked to leave.
Suzaku wasn't sure what woke him up. He seemed to become aware of the light streaming into the room and the beeping noises in the background at the same time. He opened his eyes, prepared to jerk upright if something was wrong. He relaxed when he saw that he was in a room. If he had still been out in the arena, he would have in trouble. Suzaku had known that he had been shot; the sharp pain was too strong to forget so easily. A room meant that he was safe, that he was outside of the arena and in the clear. It was the other implication of the room that bothered him.
He grunted as he pushed himself upright, carefully untangling the wires and tubes that he was connected to, frowning at the sheer amount. He didn't remember his wound being that bad, although it had hurt. Suzaku paused when it was clear that he was making more of a tangle instead of solving it. He pushed the wires and tubes off to one side, looking around the room to be sure of his surroundings.
It was obviously a hospital room, the plain white walls and minimal decoration gave it away. Suzaku nodded to himself, scanning the room before looking over to his right. There was an empty bed beside him, Suzaku forcing himself to finish looking over the room. Lelouch had been alive; at least he had been before Suzaku had lost consciousness. But the rules of the Games had always been that there was only one winner. If he was the one in the hospital, then Lelouch was dead.
Suzaku clenched his hands in the sheets, looking over to his left. He gave a sigh of relief, tipping his head back with a smile. Lelouch was there, and he was alive. Suzaku chuckled, looking back at his friend again. He would try to figure out why they had both made it out of the Games later, he was too giddy with relief to think too hard about how that detail. What he wanted to do right now was go over to where Lelouch was.
Even if they were in a hospital, the safety was only temporary. The emperor could come and demand that Lelouch be killed at any moment, although Suzaku couldn't see why the emperor would pull them both out of the Games. He shook his head and pulled the sheet away, looking down at himself.
He was wearing a hospital gown, but he could see the edge of the bandage around his stomach. Suzaku reached down to touch where he had been shot, putting pressure on the spot briefly. He peeled the sheets back further, finding that his ankle had been bandaged as well. A quick check showed that the wound that had left behind when his tracker had been cut out was treated as well, although he could just see a neat line of stitches. Suzaku nodded to himself, gently moving his injured arm.
Suzaku looked up from his arm as the door opened, surprised to see Prince Schneizel walk into the room. He tensed, one hand automatically reaching for a weapon. He hadn't thought that the royal family would come to visit Lelouch since they hadn't shown any interest in him before. Prince Schneizel was also the prime minister, so closely connected to Lelouch's father, the same one that had been trying to kill the two of them through the Games. He wasn't going to let Lelouch be killed, not after they had struggled for so long to survive this far.
Prince Schneizel just glanced over at him, doing a double take when he realized that Suzaku was sitting up. "Ah, you're awake now."
Suzaku nodded, not coming up with any weapon. He decided to go for intimidating, although he was sure that he looked laughable in the hospital gown and an obvious injury that would slow him down. Suzaku gritted his teeth and began to hoist himself from the bed. "What of it?"
The prince rolled his eyes and sat down in the available chair. "Sit down. There's no point in hurting yourself."
"No." Suzaku's arms were trembled slightly as they took his full weight. "Not until I know what's going on."
Schneizel stared at him for a long moment, Suzaku not sure how to interpret the prince's blank stare. Schneizel finally looked down with a sigh, rubbing his forehead. "I should have known better." Suzaku didn't have time to ask what Schneizel meant because the next comments were directed directly at him. "You are out of the Games, you and Lelouch were pulled out."
"But the Games only have one winner."
"This year the Games were stopped before they could reach their conclusion. This was the last year that the Hunger Games will take place; the Senate has all but voted that into law. You and Lelouch were the only surviving tributes and are now in recovery. Accommodations for you have already been settled for when you are released."
"What about Lelouch?"
"I'm afraid my brother will be staying here for far longer."
Suzaku craned his neck, trying to get a better view of Lelouch. He remembered that Lelouch had been bleeding, but he had never gotten to see the wound, Lelouch had been too busy trying to stop the bleeding. Suzaku swallowed, shifting on the bed. "What happened?"
"He fought Luciano Bradley and managed to win." Schneizel sighed, Suzaku watching as he rubbed one thumb over an eye. "He was stabbed but all reports say that he will be fine. We're just waiting to see when he will wake up and how his recovery will go."
Suzaku stared at Lelouch, feeling his stomach twist. Lelouch had fought Luciano and he had done nothing to help. He had promised Lelouch that he would protect him, promised Marianne that he would protect her son. Suzaku looked down at the floor, unable to meet Schneizel's eyes. He was sure that the prince would just offer some worthless statement about how the Games were supposed to go, but Suzaku couldn't accept that. He had tried to the utmost to keep his promise but it had come to nothing. Even now he was stuck on the other side of the room, but that was something that he could fix.
He gritted his teeth and went to stand up, freezing when Schneizel looked up at him. The prince considered him for a moment before leaning back in his chair. "What are you doing?"
"I'm going to go over there and sit by my friend. I'm fine, there's no reason that I should just be lying here."
Suzaku was sure that he saw a flicker of a smile on Schneizel's face, not sure how to react to the expression. As quickly as he spotted it, it was gone, Schneizel standing up and walking out of the room. Suzaku stared at the closed door, narrowing his eyes before shrugging. He could care less about Schneizel thought about him at the moment; he had more important things to focus on.
He was about of lift himself from the bed when he heard the door open again, Schneizel, another man that Suzaku didn't recognize and a nurse walking in. The nurse bustled over to his side, Suzaku holding still as she turned off the monitors and detached him from them. Suzaku smiled at her, watching as she left the room again. He rubbed at a sore spot on his arm as the man who had accompanied settled a chair on the side of the bed closest to him. Suzaku glanced at him, giving the man a quick look over, checking for weapons. When the man just returned his stare, Suzaku hauled himself upright, wobbling for a moment.
The man took a step forward, Suzaku waving him away and stumbling over to the wall. "I can do this."
He expected more of a protest from Schneizel and the man, but neither of them seemed phased by his insistence. Both of them turned their full attention to Lelouch, leaving Suzaku to limp his way over to the chair, using the wall for balance when he had to.
It was a relief to sink down into the chair, Suzaku stretching his injured leg out in front of him. He glanced up at the two men on the other side of Lelouch's bed before moving into a position that he could get up easily from. So far, neither of them seemed to be a threat to him or Lelouch, but Suzaku was not willing to let his guard down until they proved that they could be trusted. Once he was sure that they wouldn't be attacking, he turned his attention to Lelouch, feeling the corner of his mouth twitch up into a smile.
Despite his failure, Lelouch was still alive and would recover. That was something at least. He reached out to touch the back of Lelouch's hand, leaning forward so he could actually close his fingers around Lelouch's. Suzaku ignored the way the two men on the other side of the bed went still for a moment, too busy enjoying the feel of Lelouch's hand in his. For all of Lelouch's plans and their doubts, they had made it out of the Games together. Suzaku would gloat about it later, when Lelouch was healed and they were back in Area 11. He smiled at the thought, glad that there was a chance for after for the both of them.
He looked up at the two men, relieved that they were too involved in whatever they were discussing. It wasn't the ideal situation he wanted, with just him and Lelouch, but he would take what he could get. He was sure that a doctor would appear eventually and try to get him back to his bed because of his injuries. Suzaku didn't think that the excuse that he had suffered worse during the course of the Games would help his case. Everyone in Britannia probably wanted to make sure he lived because he was symbol of their triumph, both he and Lelouch were suddenly more important than they had ever been.
Suzaku shook his head, letting go of Lelouch's fingers to trace the veins on the back of his hand. Lelouch would know how to handle the spotlight better than Suzaku would, Lelouch had been trained for it. Suzaku was more than willing just to follow Lelouch's lead on this one thing so he didn't end up embarrassing the both of them.
A clatter from the hallway made him look up, Suzaku halfway out of his seat before he could stop himself. He couldn't help the glance down at Lelouch, inclining his body so he was partially hovering Lelouch. He shot a glance at the door, holding the position until he was sure that nothing was going to come after them. Only then did he let out the breath he had been holding and sink down into his seat, wincing as he put weight on his bad ankle.
To his surprise, neither Schneizel nor the other man looked shocked by his sudden movement. Schneizel was the more amused of the two, although the prince wasn't looking at him. Suzaku tipped his head to side, meeting the other man's gaze as he chuckled. "It gets easier to live with."
"What does?"
"The jumpiness. You come out of the Games ready to strike at anything and everyone, but you get used to society again." The man looked up at the ceiling with a frown. "That's probably why they keep you in a hospital for a few days and then back at the training center. Of course, you're running a gambit of interviews half feral, but it helps. At least you're not being thrown back into your Area and told to cope."
Suzaku sighed, giving the man a quick once over. He would have never pegged the man for someone who had been in the Games, he looked far more composed than Suzaku remembered some of the others who had won being. Even Tohdoh carried the same haunted look that he had come out of the Games with. People could tell that Tohdoh had participated in the Games; it was just something that all victors had. Then again, Tohdoh had been one of the calmer victors to come out of the Games. Suzaku had seen footage of a few tributes who had come out of the Games and had not been able to get away from that edge. He had spent the entire time watching them waiting for them to snap, and many had.
He sat back in his chair, settling his hand back over Lelouch's. "Does it ever go away?"
That got the bland smile to waver, the corner of it twitching down for a second. Suzaku grinned at his victory, glad he had managed to get past part of the façade. His victory didn't last too long, because the man regained his composure quickly, leaning forward. "It never does. Anything you could do over there could set me off and I wouldn't know what. It's a conditioned response."
Suzaku snorted. "The same goes for me then."
"Now you're getting it." The man nodded. "I could promise that you and Prince Lelouch would be safe, but you wouldn't believe me. I know that from experience. Get used to that too; you'll never believe that you are safe again."
Suzaku accepted the news with a nod, not sure why the man had decided to give him that bit of information. He had lived his entire life in the Areas where safety was something that could always be taken away, either by the emperor himself or the viceroy. Still, he was always willing to listen to advice from victors of the Hunger Games. He preferred to be prepared for any situation that would come up.
"Kanon, stop baiting him." Schneizel didn't bother to look up at either of them, giving the monitors by Lelouch one long look before standing up. He brushed past Kanon, pausing at the door to look back over at Suzaku. "You intend on staying here."
Suzaku was a bit surprised that it wasn't a question, but he nodded anyway. Schneizel just narrowed his eyes, the bland expression that he kept on his face easily turning into a glare. "Keep an eye on him, Suzaku Kururugi."
"You think that someone will come after us?"
"No. But I prefer to be prepared for any event." Schneizel tipped his head slightly in Lelouch's direction. "Watch over him and expect members of the royal family to be coming in and out over the next few days."
Suzaku swallowed, but tried to look resolute. "Have you called Nunnally and Marianne up?"
"Nunnally has been in Pendragon almost as long as you two have." Suzaku stared at Schneizel with wide eyes, the prince not seeming to notice his surprise. "But Marianne has been informed about you two. She and Nunnally were here earlier, but we managed to convince them to leave for a few hours to eat and sleep. They'll be returning soon enough."
"So that's why you were here." Suzaku couldn't help himself from blurting the words out. From the way that Lelouch had talked about the royals and how none of them had come to their rescue before the Games, he had thought that none of them had cared. He had never thought that any of them had cared about the prince and princess that had been cast out of Pendragon.
He was given what looked like a real smile, the first he had seen from Schneizel. It disappeared quickly, Schneizel glancing over at Kanon as he spoke. "Expect us to be in between Nunnally and Marianne. We'll bring you what news we can to prepare you for what you see out there. It's a different world out there, Suzaku Kururugi."
Schneizel walked out of the room without further explanation, Kanon following after him. Suzaku could only stare after them in shock. Suddenly, things didn't seem as simple as waiting for Lelouch to recover and adjusting to being around people who weren't trying to kill him again. Apparently something had gone on in the days when they were fighting for their lives. He would try to find out as much as he could before Lelouch woke up, so he could explain if Lelouch needed it.
He looked down at Lelouch, stroking his fingers over the back of Lelouch's hand before settling into a comfortable position. He couldn't keep himself from the occasional glances at the door or the regular scans of their room even though he knew that it was safe. Schneizel had told him to protect Lelouch and he couldn't bring himself to trust anyone completely just yet.
Suzaku smiled at Lelouch, patting his friend's hand before forcing himself to pull away. He couldn't get into the habit of hovering; Lelouch wouldn't allow it when he was conscious. But while Lelouch was unconscious… Suzaku swallowed and pushed himself slightly out of the chair, leaning over Lelouch to kiss his forehead. He straightened out Lelouch's bangs, something that Lelouch would have slapped his hand away for before, sitting down when he was done.
"Sleep, Lelouch. We're safe now."
Lelouch struggled to open his eyes, his thoughts still slow and fuzzy. He tried to shake his head, not surprised when he couldn't quite move. It didn't feel like he was all the way awake yet. He felt his eyes start to close again, forcing them to stay open. He had slept for long enough, he couldn't afford anymore, not until he was sure about what was going on. The last thing he remembered, he was being carried into the helicopter after Suzaku, and that was strange enough to warrant investigation.
From what he could see, he was in a room, the equipment in the room hinting towards a hospital room. That was a relief in a way. It meant that he was out of the Games and immediate danger. He would worry about the other dangers later, when he didn't feel like he was thinking far too slowly.
He moved his head slightly, hearing a gasp from his other side. Lelouch frowned, wanting to see the source of the noise, but the effort of turning his head seemed like too much of an effort. He shut his eyes, taking a deep breath before opening them again.
Suzaku was sitting in the chair right beside him, fast asleep. Lelouch smiled, looking down at where their hands were just touching, flipping his hand over and closing it around Suzaku's. So Suzaku was still alive, that was far better than what he thought. The panic from the arena seemed so far away at the moment, Lelouch finding it hard to do anything but just accept the things he was seeing. He would have to think over the implications later.
Lelouch managed to turn his head, his eyes widening as he saw his mother and Nunnally sitting on the other side of the bed. Nunnally was pushed as close as she could get to the bed, her hands hovering over his. He blinked rapidly, trying to keep her in focus as another wave of exhaustion moved over him. He didn't know how long he had been asleep, but he had been that way for too long. He wasn't going to let this chance disappear, not before he had talked to his mother and Nunnally again.
He smiled at his sister. Nunnally leaned forward and grabbed onto his hand. "Lelouch."
"Hello." His voice cracked embarrassingly, but his mouth felt far too dry. He swallowed, trying to get his voice to sound like normal, but his sister didn't seem to mind.
She smiled back at him, squeezing his hand instead of hugging him. "Hello. I've missed you."
"Missed you too." He watched as his mother came to kneel by his head, leaning into her touch as she brushed his bangs away from his forehead. He heard her laugh just before she kissed his forehead, her lips lingering there for a moment.
Marianne pulled away long enough to retrieve a chair. "You had us so worried."
"Sorry."
"Don't do that again." Nunnally was really crying down. Lelouch wanted to reach up to wipe her tears away, but Nunnally was holding his hand too tightly for him to move it. "Don't you dare, Lelouch."
"I won't. I can't." He tried to give her hand a squeeze, just managing to curl his fingers. "Won."
"I know. You both did." Nunnally looked up, probably looking over at Suzaku. "I'm so proud of you both."
Lelouch glanced between the two of them with a smile on his face. He felt his mother press a hand to his forehead, Lelouch closing his eyes and leaning into the touch.
It was the last thing he remembered when he woke up again.
He was sure that time had passed because the light in the room was different and he couldn't feel anyone holding his hands anymore. He groaned, pressing his head back into the pillow. At least his head was clearer now, so he could think instead of just drifting. Lelouch turned to look at where he remembered Nunnally being before, not surprised to see her hovering nervously over him. He just sighed and pressed his head back. "I fell asleep."
"Yes. Suzaku did too, so don't feel bad."
"Hey!"
Lelouch turned to look at Suzaku, relieved that the hazy memory from the last time he had been awake was actually true. He didn't want to wake up and discover that he had survived the Games and Suzaku hadn't. Lelouch reached over to touch Suzaku's hand, patting it gently in an attempt to soothe the guilty look on Suzaku's face. "I don't blame you. It must have been boring."
Suzaku rubbed the back of his neck. "I'm actually surprised I managed it. It seemed like the entire royal family was determined to visit at some point or another."
"The entire…" Lelouch went to sit up only to be pushed down by Nunnally. He frowned and gently removed her hand from his shoulder, going to sit up again when Nunnally and Suzaku forced him down again. Suzaku kept a hold on him as Nunnally sat up, Lelouch tempted to thrash, but the ache from his stomach kept him from moving. He settled for glaring at Suzaku. "Let me up. I'm not staying here if they can all get in."
Suzaku shook his head. "It doesn't matter; most of them have been here already."
"And you just let them? Even the emperor?"
"It's different now, Lelouch."
"It really is." Nunnally spoke up, Lelouch immediately turning his attention to her. He could trust Nunnally to tell him the truth quickly no matter what, Suzaku might be tempted to feed him little bits of the truth based on what Suzaku thought he could handle. Nunnally met his eyes and nodded, gently pushing Suzaku's hands from him. "You didn't actually win the Games."
"So why am I here?"
"I…Well…" She bit her lip, refusing to meet his gaze. "It's hard to find a place to start, but I'll try." Nunnally took a deep breath. "Father is dead. Kanon shot him when he tried to attack Schneizel. Odysseus is the emperor now."
Lelouch stared at her, trying to figure out what was going on with the little information he had. There was no way that Schneizel would try to force a confrontation with Charles, Schneizel was far too smart for that. He was also the one benefiting the most from Charles' rule. Everyone assumed that Schneizel would either take the throne or the next emperor would just be a puppet for Schneizel. That alone explained Odysseus, but not why Schneizel's pet would shoot the emperor.
Nunnally groaned and hid her face in her hands. "I'm doing this all wrong, but here's the best I can give you. The Hunger Games have been stopped, completely. It was…Euphemia and Schneizel decided…" Nunnally shook her head, refusing to meet his gaze. "I came up to Pendragon the day after you two were brought up."
Lelouch didn't get a chance to ask why, Nunnally quickly plowing on. "I couldn't just let the two of you die and I thought that I could do something, even if it was just convincing father to let one of you go and then making sure that the other one could win. The Games are rigged already, so what harm could there be in using that? But I actually started something, I got a lot of people to help me because I just wanted to pull everyone out of the Games this year and then I wanted to stop the Games entirely. When Father wouldn't back down, we went to talk to him, but he threatened us and Kanon just…snapped for a moment. Odysseus' first command as emperor was to cancel the Games."
"Why?"
"Because it wasn't fair! I didn't want to lose you or Suzaku and I know Mother would have suffered as well. I didn't want to lose anyone else. And don't you dare tell me that I shouldn't have tried, because it worked and you two are alive. That's the only thing that matters to me."
"Nunnally…"
"I don't regret it! I thought we were too late, that you were going to die. I saw you and… You know that I love Suzaku like a brother, Lelouch, but it wouldn't have been the same without you."
Lelouch pulled her down against him, patting her back as Nunnally cried into his shoulder. He glanced over at Suzaku for help, not surprised when his friend just shrugged. Lelouch sighed and wrapped his arms around Nunnally. "I'm not mad. I was just worried."
"I couldn't just let you two die!"
"I know. I know. And we wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you." He pulled back just enough so that he could tilt her chin up. "You saved us, and that's all that matters."
It wasn't a lie, at least not completely. The fact that Nunnally had saved them was all that had mattered for now, but Lelouch couldn't help himself from wanting to know what else had gone on. He had to know what Nunnally had promised and what she had gotten herself into. He was sure that she had been smart enough to be careful about what she had promised to Schneizel, but he wanted to be sure. He wanted to be able to protect Nunnally.
He smiled at her, relieved when Nunnally smiled back. She rocked back into her chair, not letting go of his hand. Lelouch squeezed her hand, wiggling over as close to the edge of the bed as he could get. He reached up to brush a piece of hair out of her face. "Just let me recover, and then we can go back home and forget this ever happened."
It was what he wanted more than anything. The public knew he was a prince, but he was not about to take advantage of that. The palace was nothing for him, the small house they had back in Area 11 was more like home than Pendragon had ever been. Now, after the Games, Lelouch was sure that he would ever be able to stay in Pendragon ever again. What he wanted to do was go back to the familiar. His father was dead, and his father was the only one he had held a grudge against. Then there was a nagging feeling that, if he stayed in Pendragon, he would end up losing more people who were important to him.
He was dragged from his thoughts as Nunnally pulled away from him, nervously playing with her sleeve. "I…I was hoping we could stay. I want to stay, to see that this goes through. And there's so much more that I could do. Odysseus is willing to help me and we could change Britannia. Odysseus has even asked Mother to stay, to help him. He's starting a council to help him run this country the way it should be. It would really help if you stayed too. You could probably handle any situations that came up better than we could, I know you could."
Lelouch stared at Nunnally, not sure what to say. He looked over at Suzaku, seeing an equally panicked look on his friend's face. He shook his head, looking back at Nunnally. "I…"
"You can go back home and get better, Lelouch. It doesn't have to be right now."
"I can't Nunnally." Lelouch glanced around the room, trying to find a way to explain his reasoning or to change the subject. He could only shake his head and stare at her. "I don't want to stay, Nunnally. I won't be able to. I could help you but, not here."
"You don't have to be here, Lelouch." Nunnally leaned over him, catching is hand again. "You don't and I won't make you. But just think about it. You're smart and we'll need your help, even if it's just over the phone. But you should just know that I want to stay here. I found a place where I can do something instead of just sitting around and I want to help."
Nunnally looked like she was going to say something else when someone knocked on the door. She glanced back at the door, looking back at him. She flinched and ducked her head. "I'm sorry. They've been making sure that we sleep and eat, and that's my call. I'll tell them that I'll be out in an hour. I want to stay as long as I can."
"No." Lelouch reached up to smooth her hair back. "You eat and get rest. You're not going to waste away for me. I'm doing enough of that for the both of us."
Nunnally shook her head with a laugh, patting his hand. "Alright Lelouch. I'll see you tomorrow then."
"Night Nunnally." He kept smiling until she had shut the door, then he slumped back to the pillows with a long sigh.
Immediately Suzaku was by his side, anxiously hovering over him until Lelouch waved him away. "I'm tired, not dying."
That didn't get the smile he expected after the comment, Suzaku just staring at him for a long moment before he sank down into the nearest seat. Lelouch grimaced and reached out for Suzaku. "It was a joke. Stop looking at me like that."
"You were dying before."
"I'm not now." Suzaku flinched back, Lelouch pressing a hand over his eyes. He hadn't meant to snap, at least not at Suzaku for this. It wasn't his fault for all of this.
Lelouch had known that Nunnally would eventually go her own way, but he had always though that it would have come after he had moved on himself. And there was some part of him that had thought that she would have needed him still in some way after the fact. If Nunnally was starting out in Pendragon, after having been the one to successfully convince Odysseus to end the Games, then she wouldn't need his help. She would be fine all on her own, but that didn't stop him from feeling like Pendragon was taking the rest of his family away from him.
He turned his head to look at Suzaku. "I don't want to stay."
"We don't have to. We can go back to Area 11."
"Go back and do what?" Lelouch sat back, staring up at the ceiling. "We go back and just carry on like nothing has happened? That's what I want to do, Suzaku, but I promised Shirley. I promised her that I would try and change the world and I can't do that from Area 11, even if that's over the phone."
"I'm sure that she would understand." Suzaku paused at the look that Lelouch gave him, raising his hands. "She would, Lelouch. But it's up to you in the end."
Lelouch sighed. He had hoped that Suzaku would act as the moral compass and demand that Lelouch keep his promise. He was sure that Shirley would have said the same thing about him, but that didn't make things any better. He owed her and Rolo something for failing them. He had the chance to get them out of the Games and he had failed completely, he had been too busy with his own elaborate plans.
He felt the mattress sink as Suzaku moved to sit on the side of the bed. Lelouch reached up touch Suzaku's arm, wincing at the stretch the move created. Suzaku gently guided his hand back down to the bed but kept a hold of it. "So, what's the plan Lelouch?"
Lelouch continued to stare up at the ceiling, not sure of the answer himself. It was just a simple matter of overcoming his fear of Pendragon and, while Lelouch was sure that he could do that, he wouldn't force Suzaku to stay. He wouldn't drag Suzaku into a political situation, not when he was sure that Suzaku was still on a hair trigger. That would be a disaster waiting to happen. Lelouch couldn't even begin to imagine what he would be like until he had banished the Hunger Games completely from his mind.
"I don't know."
"You don't have to decide today. We have a while."
That got him to relax even though he had known that. He had time to debate the pros and cons; it was not a decision that he was going to make lightly. He did know one thing. He wasn't going to just plunge into the same political games that Nunnally was playing, not until he was sure of himself.
He squeezed Suzaku's hand, drawing Suzaku's attention back to him. "I do want to go back, at least until things settle again. Until we settle again. After that, I'll have a plan."
Suzaku just nodded, slipping from the bed and back into the seat. "I'll be waiting here for it. And don't push yourself; I don't want to have to put up with the constant reminders from your family to make sure you don't hurt yourself."
Lelouch laughed, trailing off when it hurt. He waved away Suzaku's hand, deciding to grab it and pull it close. He wasn't exactly tired yet, but he was sure that he would be falling asleep soon. He wanted to be asleep before the nurse came in. He could put up with fussing from Nunnally, but that was about it and he had weeks of that to look forward to. Lelouch closed his eyes and took a deep breath, turning his head so his cheek was resting against Suzaku's arm. After days in the Games, he didn't feel safe without having someone near when he slept. "Keep watch."
He felt Suzaku's hand card through his hair before Suzaku straightened it out. "Will do, Lelouch."
"Hello Pendragon, this is Milly Ashford and this will be the last time I will ever have to talk about the Hunger Games on a yearly basis. That deserves a cheer." Suzaku smiled as he watched Milly Ashford play the studio, shaking his head. He turned his head to look at where Lelouch was dozing in the other chair. He would have to wake Lelouch up soon; they would be arriving in Area 11 in a matter of minutes, not enough time to watch a rerun of their interview with Milly Ashford. It didn't say anything that he didn't know anyway.
They had just talked about their experience in the Games, which was nothing new from the other post-Hunger Games interviews. There had been a few questions devoted to what they were going to do now that the Games were over for good, whether Lelouch would go back to the palace with the others or whether he'd go back to Area 11 with Suzaku. Suzaku still remembered the shock that Lelouch's answer had given the crowd. A prince of Britannia was going back to Area 11 to live the life he had left behind. Then the topic had drifted to how they were doing, probably because Lelouch had looked like he was flagging, not that Suzaku had been able to blame him. Lelouch had only been out of the hospital for a few days, but he had insisted on the interview. Thankfully, he was looking much better now after a month of recovery in Pendragon. He wasn't clear to do strenuous work yet, but Lelouch had insisted on returning and Suzaku hadn't had the heart to argue with him.
Pendragon was a grand city, and Suzaku had spent most of Lelouch's recovery time wandering the city with Nunnally and Euphemia, attempting to return to something more like a human. In Pendragon he was a hero, something that Suzaku didn't want to be. He had killed people, the fact that he had done it to survive meant nothing. They were still dead. At least he had stopped flinching and looking for the nearest weapon whenever someone approached, that was the one thing that Pendragon had helped him with. Suzaku wasn't sure that Lelouch had managed that much, then again, Lelouch had been confined to a bed and a house the entire time. Their walk from the car to the train had been Lelouch's second time out since the Games.
He reached over to the remote, turning off the broadcast. A soft groan from beside him made him smile, Suzaku turning back to look at Lelouch as he woke up. "Hey."
Lelouch stared at him for a minute, Suzaku watching as Lelouch took in where he was and who he was with before sitting up straight. It worried him that Lelouch was still spending a moment in panic when he woke up, but Suzaku was sure that it would pass eventually. Everything that had happened to them in the Games would eventually just disappear overnight and Suzaku didn't want it to. He wanted to find a way to make up for the two tributes he had killed and all the people he hadn't been able to save and he knew that Lelouch felt the same.
"Are we there?"
"No." The train started to slow as he spoke, Suzaku getting to his feet to look out the window. He smiled as he saw the train station roll by, his smile wavering as he saw the crowd. He glanced at Lelouch, tipping his head to the side. "Now we are."
Lelouch nodded and carefully lifted himself from the chair, walking slowly to the window. His shoulder knocked against Suzaku's, the upward tilt of Lelouch's mouth telling him that it wasn't completely an accident. Suzaku leaned into Lelouch, enjoying the closeness before turning his attention to the crowd. "Will you be able to handle it?"
"I'm a prince of Britannia. I can handle a crowd just fine." Lelouch turned away, making his way to the front of the car.
Suzaku watched him leave, relieved that Lelouch wasn't reaching for his stomach like it still pained him. Suzaku had spent the first two weeks of Lelouch walking always reaching for him, afraid that Lelouch would fall over from pain. And Lelouch had been in pain, Suzaku had been able to tell by the way that Lelouch had paled every time he had stood up or the way that he held himself. Around Nunnally Lelouch would try to hide it, but he didn't bother around Suzaku. After the Games, it was hard to hide anything from each other anymore.
He shook his head and walked after Lelouch, catching up to him in time to grab onto Lelouch's hand, surprised when Lelouch didn't shy away. As soon as Lelouch had been able to move around on his own, he had started shoving Suzaku away. Save for the one time when they had been interviewed by Milly Ashford, Suzaku had been only allowed brief contact with Lelouch. It was almost like back before the Reaping and Suzaku had been doing his best to not let his disappointment show. Even now, although Lelouch allowed him the contact, Suzaku was shaken off a moment later. Suzaku stared at his hand, flexing it as Lelouch went to open the door.
"Suzaku?"
He looked up and smiled. "I'm alright."
"You're not." Lelouch hesitated, glancing at the half open door before walking back over. He stared at Suzaku before sighing. "Just wait for a while longer. I have some…things I have to sort out first." Lelouch reached up to touch Suzaku's cheek, his hand lingering there for a moment before Lelouch pulled it away. "I haven't forgotten."
"It's fine."
"It's not, but I promise that we'll get back to that topic soon. I'd prefer not to stay in this limbo between whatever we are to each other for much longer."
Suzaku laughed. "I said that it was fine, Lelouch. I can wait."
Lelouch stared at him, apparently determining that Suzaku wasn't lying because he turned back to the door. Suzaku saw Lelouch's shoulders rise slightly as his friend took a deep breath, Lelouch pausing in the act of reaching for the doors. "We're presenting a united front, remember? You can't just hover over my shoulder."
That was the only warning that Suzaku got before Lelouch pushed open the door. Suzaku waited for Lelouch to step out of the train before following, coming to a stop by his friend's side. He was immediately blinded by cameras going off. Suzaku tipped his head to the side, tensing at the amount of noise that was coming from the crowd. It was just cheering, but the noise in combination with being unable to see past the first few rows because of the cameras made Suzaku want to turn and run.
He felt Lelouch grab onto his wrist, the grip a reminder of where he was. He couldn't just run anymore, he had to stand and face what was going on. People were no longer a threat, or at least not the same one he always associated them with. He and Lelouch were going to be fine. And, in a way, it was a relief to feel that Lelouch was shaking too. At least he wasn't the only one to be affected like this.
Lelouch shot him a sideways glance before raising a hand and waving, Suzaku following his lead. The motion from the two of them produced more cheers from the crowd, the people of Area 11 glad to have their tributes home. Unfortunately, there was only one person in the crowd that really made the experience worth while. Nunnally and Marianne were in Pendragon, where they were beginning to settle in, so Tohdoh was the only one remaining in Area 11. Suzaku tried to find him, not surprised when he couldn't. Everyone in Area 11 had showed up to welcome them home. Suzaku glanced at Lelouch out of the corner of his eye, glad that Lelouch was still here for him. He couldn't imagine doing this alone.
He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, calming himself before he looked over the crowd again. This time he managed a smile, managed to act like he had been before the Games. That's what the people wanted to see, two victorious tributes instead of two exhausted boys. The least Suzaku could do was give them that. Later he could go home and collapse, probably after he had thoroughly searched the house for anything that could be a danger to the two of them. For now, he just waved at the crowd and cherished Lelouch's hold on his wrist as a lifeline.