Disclaimer: "I claim dis!"

"That's what SHE said!"

"Duuuude!"

A/N: Hehe. Three days left to tie loose ends. Lets see how our dear Kakashi will handle the pressure of this knowledge. *sadistic writer chuckles*

To NougatEvolution: Seriously, I love you. Both your reviews here and the ones on Wand Cores are frequent and helpful; you make me want to write. You are the cure for writer's block. Thank you so incredibly much. Also, sorry for this fic being a little difficult on those who have forgotten their canon, but it's quite hard to start from scratch when you're trying to write a study on a rather complex character, like Hatake. I'll try to tone it ladywinterfic: Thank you for the kind words. Also, Kakashi, generally speaking, has a lot of faith in his students, and worries about them less than mother-he… I mean, Iruka. But this is the Akatsuki we're talking about. And –Sasuke-. Anyone would be worried. Even Gai.

To Girlwithfavourites: Actually I've noticed that too! Yamato saves Sakura's ass quite a few times, and they seem to be getting rather familiar with one another in the manga. I wonder why people have not been noticing that.

To the rest of you, I'm really grateful for your reviews. They are truly important for a writer; they are, in fact, vital.

Chapter 4

After more than a few hours of admittedly exhausting training the younger members of team Kakashi are sitting around panting, and even Yamato looks a little flushed. Hatake, on the other hand, looks just like he always does, cool and smooth, albeit a little sweatier. Naruto has a really huge grin on his face though; he can truly feel himself improving, and it's a wonderful sensation.

Sakura, on the other hand, looks crestfallen. It's an expression that she rarely ever wears these days; she's been tempered into iron by her medical work, but also her various missions as a kunoichi. It is, in fact, so unusual for her to appear so thoroughly disappointed, that Naruto, who's been throwing concerned looks towards her, decides to ask.

"Maaaah, Sakura-chan. You seem down. Is something the matter?" he questions a little tentatively, a frown creasing on his forehead. She turns her face to him and smiles somewhat wearily, reassuring him that all's fine. The jinchuuriki is not convinced, however.

"Sakura… We've been teammates since, like, forever, and I can tell when you're keeping something from me, you know." he states in a quieter, mature voice, deducing that perhaps it's a personal matter, that the girl does not want to discuss it in front of the whole team. Suddenly, she throws a strangely angry glare at him, and she gets up abruptly.

"I'll tell you what the matter is! I thought I was making good progress, you know. I was gaining some confidence for once, lately. But then you… all of you… You're just so insanely powerful! Kakashi-sensei has some kind of legendary father, and a Sharingan, Yamato-taichou has his amazing genes, Sai's been training with the best ever since he was a toddler, and you have a goddamn tailed beast inside you! How am I supposed to compare! I'm just some civilian girl! I'm feeling like my pathetic pre-adolescent self all over again..." she spits, frustrated, and kicks a rock so hard that it flies off to the distance. Tsunade's training has pushed her physical strenght to frightening levels.

Then she chuckles, and mutters something about being a silly woman, the tension disappearing from her face. Nonetheless, her teammates have taken her words quite seriously; Naruto, especially, seems very troubled. It is Kakashi who replies to her, however, offering her one of his invisible grins.

"Nonsense, Sakura-chan. You've been getting stronger at an extraordinary rate. The only reason you can't beat me or Yamato yet is because we have a ridiculous amount of experience; we've had way, way, way more time to learn jutsus and hone our reflexes. You will easily surpass us in a few years, perhaps even less." he declares cheerfully, beaming at her through his happily squinted eye. Yamato nods his enthusiastic agreement. Sai thinks they look like clowns everytime they are around an angry woman.

"I doubt that's true. Lately I am constantly being rescued by you guys; and it feels really shameful. You all have these extraordinary natural advantages…! I doubt I can make up for that. You are all so lucky!" she murmurs, and although she tries her best not to whine, it does come off a little childish. Naruto can understand her insecurities, he really can. And yet, he can't help but feel a little angry at her words.

"Oh, we're lucky huh? I'm lucky to be the jinchuuriki, right? Even though the price was growing up all alone, not knowing why everyone is afraid of me, and now being chased by a group of lunatics. And Kakashi is lucky too, I guess. His father missing on missions all the time and then dying must have been great. And he must be thrilled he got his dead friend's eye! And let me not start on Yamato-taichou. I mean, he's sure lucky to be some kind of genetic experiment; you'd love to be in his position. Or Sai's, right? It must be great being a child killer that has been brainwashed to forget your loved ones!" he tells her coolly, his eyes accusing.

Ouch.

The two jounin flinch at his rather cruel words and the mention of their not entirely pleasant backgrounds, while the young woman's lips part as she throws her eyes downwards embarrassedly. She looks downright miserable now, while the rest of them seem to be oddly tense; and so Naruto immediately regrets his little outburst.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean… I'd just give anything to be in your position you know. To have my parents with me, and not have a damn fox instead. And I… Sorry, Sakura-chan." He mumbles, avoiding the young girl's gaze. He shouldn't be the one feeling bad about this, she thinks to herself, however.

It is me who just behaved like a spoiled little girl.

"No, I'm sorry. I don't know what I was thinking. Yamato-taichou, Kakashi-sensei, Sai-kun, forgive me." she says a little hurriedly, her cheeks flushing. "I just don't want to be the one that needs to be saved. I also want to be able to protect the people I care for." she adds, very quietly. Yamato decides that it's probably his turn to say something; after all he's spent a lot of time with the young woman during these last two years, and he does not like seeing her so troubled.

Now if only he was a little better with words.

"I… uh… Well… Tsunade-hime was quite like you when she was young, you know. And now she's Hokage. So I think you worry too much about it. And after all, without you we would've been in terribly bad trouble more than a few times. Especially without your medical jutsu. You're an indispensible member of this team, you know… and… erm, yeah. You're cool." he tries his best to declare convincingly, and then he concludes that it was quite a pathetic display for a man approaching his thirties.

Somehow though, it seems to be exactly what Sakura needed to hear, and so her lips slowly curve into a smile, her eyes regaining their warm shine.

"Thank you, Yamato-taichou. That means a lot to me." she tells him and bows her head a little. With her head little lowered like that, only Naruto, who is standing right next to her, can discern the characteristic blush spreading onto her cheeks. And although he knows it's probably just her modesty causing the blood to rush into her cheeks, the jinchuuriki can't help but feel intrigued.

Strangely enough he does not feel jealous at all, however. He is simply glad to see her happy again.

"I'll treat you all to dinner tonight." Kakashi Hatake suddenly declares, while they are going through their evening Genjutsu routine, causing them to freeze. He immediately feels a bunch of disbelieving stares drilling into him full of suspicion. Yes, perhaps that was out of character, he realises, facing their incredulous expressions.

"You must be lying. You'd never willingly pay for dinner." Naruto declares with gravity, pointing his finger towards the jounin accusingly. Yamato's lip is twitching with amusement, while Sai seems to be really confused, as if a pillar of behavioural certainty just crumbled before him.

"Let's say I had an epiphany while I was being lost in the road of life this morning." the copy-nin replies casually, shrugging and then gluing his face back into the pages of Icha Icha paradise. It's this chapter where Reiko finds out that she has actually been sleeping not with Shin'Ichi, but with his sadistic twin, Ken'Ichi; the plot is quite sincerely exciting.

"It still sounds pretty suspicious, but I'll give you the benefit of the doubt, because I'm a good person and all. And also because free food sounds tremendously appealing." Naruto says, smiling brightly at his sensei and looking mildly dreamy.

Tremendously appealing?

Since when does Naruto-kun use such rather complex expressions, Kakashi wonders, eyeing the young man with interest. Perhaps he's been reading books, he concludes; he is growing up after all. Maybe he is ready to read Icha-Icha. Kakashi toys with the thought. He decides agains it.

The blond's dazzling smile really makes him feel great about his rather impulsive food-paying decision, too. He is nearly not mourning all the money he's going to be wasting.

"He wouldn't be doing something so disgustingly nice without a reason. It is against his sly nature. I believe he is probably attempting to convince us into doing something for him, and since the only thing Kakashi-sensei seems to like is porn, I therefore deduce he is doing this so that we will be convinced to offer him our porn. His plan has a loophole though. We have no porn." Sai explains pleasantly, his pale face glowing with eerie cheeriness.

Sakura giggles at the truly awesome analysis; Sai has learned to use his factual style of speech to actually produce humour, she thinks fondly. Naruto ruffles the boy's black hair mumbling something about his amazing insights, and Yamato just stares, a mask of fake exasperation worn on top of his growing amusement.

This is bound to be a great night, Kakashi conludes with finality, watching over his team affectionately.

He pushes off the thought of Madara as far as he can.

A few hours later they are downing their fifth cup of ramen, and there are quite a few empty bottles of sake on the counter before them. Naruto's face is flushed and glowing with endless happiness, his arms tighly wrapped around Sai's and Sakura's shoulders and his feet swinging around the stool. He is babbling on about some surreal stories related to all the great exploits he is going to become famed for once he is Hokage.

Kakashi is not being quite as loud or drunk as the rest of them (even Sai is somewhat loud when drunk, he observes not without surprise), since he is quite used to alcohol. Once again he distances himself a little, at least mentally, and he watches them. He finds a strange pleasure in watching those he cares for being alive and having fun; perhaps it is because he does not take it for granted.

Most of all, he watches the jinchuuriki, feeling himself oddly moved by the incredible warmth on the boy's face.

You're going to become Hokage soon enough, Naruto-kun, I believe it. Whatevers happens, you'll survive all the hardship that's coming for us, and you'll fulfil your dream. I swear it.

"Yeah, he used to sleep with the plushie even after he became ANBU. But don't tell him, he'll kill me!" Yamato whispers in a conspiratory manner; he is becoming quite loose-tongued now that he's downed some sake, Kakashi notes to himself. He is quite entertaining, actually.

"Really…? Raidou? That's awesome!" Naruto yells, a grin splitting his face in two. Kakashi is not really sure why sleeping with a plushie is awesome, but he nods his agreement anyway.

"Shhhh, keep it out down, Naruto-kun. This is very confidential information." Yamato hisses, looking around him worriedly. The copy-nin can understand why; even a drunk man does not want to face a severly pissed-off Raidou. Naruto winks at him knowingly, and then pretends, in a very unconvincing fashion, to be talking about a completely unrelated subject. Something about toads, the jounin vaguely realises.

Sakura, also slightly flushed due to the effects of alcohol, is holding her stomach, and Hatake can't really tell if it's due to having eaten too much, or due to having giggled too much. Probably both, he deduces resignedly and pours himself another glass of sake. Too bad he can't bring himself to have fun tonight; the knowledge of the mission that awaits them weighs heavily on his mind.

This team… My team... It could be one of its last moments.

Sai, who apparently handles alcohol in an abysmally bad way, is stuttering something utterly silly in his usual cool, pragmatic manner. The rest of them are laughing loudly, and even Kakashi finds himself smiling widely behind his mask. If only that underlying pain in his chest, that guilt, would go away…

It is far past midnight when they eventually leave, and that's only because Teuchi, the owner of Ichiraku Ramen, was actually beginning to fall asleep. His daughter, Ayame, was already snoring in a corner of the shop. To the team's great surprise, Hatake Kakashi, true to his word, actually pays for everything, including the drinks. Sakura stares at her teacher and rubs her eyes partially to make sure she isn't dreaming, and partially because she is horribly sleepy.

Outside the shop, they wish each other good night with cheery drunken movements, and eventually split up towards their respective residences. And then there's that crossroad again, where the only ones to turn left are Kakashi and Naruto. As soon as they are left alone, Naruto, to his teacher's surprise, immediately stops babbling cheerfully and becomes quiet.

He obviously does not feel so much at ease with me.

But the jounin is actually wrong. He knows that as soon as he turns around and finds the young man staring at him with a serious, examining glare. Although it is quite obvious that the blond is somewhat drunk, his expression is actually pensive. Suddenly Kakashi feels strangely uneasy; did he do something to upset the kid?

"Neh… Sensei… You're not acting normal. This morning, and during dinner... I'm slightly worried about you." Naruto finally mutters, his voice faltering a little due to the influence of sake, but his intentions far from humorous. The jounin is taken aback. He's always been an absolutely flawless actor, able to hide the most incredible amounts of torment and pain under his beloved mask. And yet Naruto-kun, who's not even that observant as a general rule, appears to have sensed he is hiding something from them.

"Naruto… You know, you shouldn't call me sensei anymore. We are all equal members of a team now. Plus, chances are you are much stronger than me, too." he tells the boy light-heartedly, hoping that the flattery will get him rambling about his future exploits again. It doesn't, however.

"Well, the team is under your command. And anyway, that's a silly answer. In fact, I think you're avoiding my question and changing the subject. But I guess it might be something personal, so I won't insist, okay?" Naruto says. The last sentence is spoken rather softly, and Kakashi feels, momentarily, terrible for keeping the upcoming mission a secret from the boy. And yet, he knows he can do no different. That stupid young man will probably chakra-exhaust himself if he finds out, training like an obsessive moron day and night; the idea of Sasuke turns him compulsive like that, the jounin remembers with bitterness.

I need to find a way to avoid this partciular conversation.

And then the silver-haired man realises that he actually does want to have a conversation with the boy. Well, young man now. He might be dying soon enough, and he doesn't want to have any regrets about his life; at least not any more regrets than the ones he has already been carrying for years.

"Naruto-kun… Do you want to take a walk with me before we go home?" he suggests, and he is surprised to find his voice weak and uncertain; as insanely powerful as he is when it comes to fighting, especially with having mastered his Kamui, he is still never too sure of what to do when it comes to people. Especially the people he cares about. The jinchuuriki looks at him inquisitively, but he smiles and nods anyway, following the older man in silence.

"I wanted to tell you… I'm sorry." The silver-haired shinobi phrases evenly at some point, the small visible portion of his face expressionless.

"What are you even talking about?" Naruto immediately replies, not in the loud, childish manner that he would have a few years back, but with some measure of concern instead. He has no idea what this could possibly be about. His eyes fall onto his teacher's face looking for a sign, but as usual, the jounin is unreadable. His reputation of being "mysterious" is not unfounded.

"I'm talking about the fact that I was terrible teacher." the older shinobi replies factually, although inwardly he cringes at the sound of this unpleasant truth. Naruto's frown deepens at that explanation.

"You were a great teacher, Kakashi-sensei. You and Jiraiya were the best teachers ever. And Iruka-sensei, too, although I barely learned anything from him, even though he really tried. I was such an idiot, back then…" he states quite seriously, and he stops walking, staring at the jounin intensely. Kakashi finds the ferocious blueness of his eyes unsettling; and surprisingly he does not think of Minato this time.

"No, I wasn't. I didn't devote nearly enough time to you. Or to Sakura-chan, to be honest. I even pawned you off to Ebisu at some point, remember? I should have known better." the silver-haired man responds. Naruto finds it really weird that the tone of the man's voice is so casual and cool even though they are discussing something serious like that. The jinchuuriki purses his lips in thought.

"No, you were not a bad teacher, not really. I was dead last, and I am well-aware that I was being both loud and annoying. It is only normal that you'd focus on Sasuke-kun. I don't like saying it, but he was much stronger than me at the time.l" the blond mutters after a few moments of silence, only he sounds somewhat less sure of himself now. He wonders what Kakashi-sensei is trying to say with all this.

"No, you weren't much weaker than them, Naruto-kun. In fact, you had great power, and great potential, and I knew that at the time, too. Your ability was not the reason why I didn't focus on you. It was because I made a terrible mistake; I assumed that Sasuke needed me more than you did, with everything that had happened to his family, and so I focused on him instead. I was too blind to see that you were suffering just as much, and were simply being braver about it. You were very good at appearing to be doing fine." Kakashi says, so gently that he almost doesn't recognise his own voice. And yet, his face remains oddly blank.

Naruto's lips part in disbelief.

He has never before heard the jounin speaking about his own private thoughts and feelings like that, and it had also never crossed his mind that Kakashi might have tossed him aside not because he thought him more useless than the rest, but because he thought him more self-sufficient.

"But you were right. Sasuke needed you more than I did, sensei. Sasuke-kun… If I too had known just how badly he was suffering inside, I would have done my best to help him as well. I am glad you focused on him, even though there was nothing we could have done for him, after all." the young blond insists, and Kakashi can barely believe how tenaciously the boy keeps defending him, even though he's been such a terrible bastard. He's not sure he deserves that much respect.

In fact, he's pretty sure he doesn't.

"There's also another reason I was very hesitant to teach you, Naruto-kun…" he begins tentatively, and his uncovered eye wanders off into the night. The young man examines his face curiously, for this is not Kakashi's usual endearing nervousness, or his theatrical embarrassment about being late; this is the copy-nin appearing truly uncertain, truly reluctant.

"Say that… Sasuke was gone forever, sacrificing himself for your sake, and that, years later, you were told to teach a genin team. Only one of the kids was… just like Sasuke. What would you do?" Kakashi nearly whispers the question, and his face is turned upwards, towards the moon. The pale light is making his hair shimmer like strands of metal. For a moment Naruto is so distrated by that sight, that he does not even realise the question is directed to him, and not simply rhetoric.

"I guess… I'd do my best to make him really happy." the blond replies irresolutely, Sakura's words echoing in his mind.

That boy, Obito… He didn't look like Uchiha. In fact, he looked a lot like you.

Naruto begins to realise where this is going, and he finds the copy-nin terribly brave for talking out loud about it.

"Theoretically, yes. But would you, really?" Kakashi insists, this time speaking quite forcefully, and there is finally real emotion in his voice, breaking out from beneath his admirable composure. Naruto is rather astonished by the raw urgency in the jounin's voice, and he tries his best to picture that imaginary situation, and how he would react to it.

They stand there, silently and numbly, until he finally comes up with a reply.

"No, I wouldn't. I would avoid him, I guess. He'd be like a ghost for me, or something, and I'd feel pain every time I would lay my eyes on him. Perhaps… perhaps I would even be angry. See him as a bad substitute, or, like, an imitator. Someone trying to take Sasuke's place and replace his face in my memories." The words are spoken very timidly, very slowly, and they are barely heard between the rustling of the wind and howling of the dogs.

Kami, he hit the nail on the head, didn't he? He has truly matured, the copy-nin thinks, and almost shivers at the boy's intuitive reply.

"I'm really sorry." Kakashi then repeats, with simplicity. And this time Naruto finally understands what the older man has been trying to apologise about, and he nods with both gravity and understanding. Deep inside, there is a thought making Naruto smile bitterly.

"I could have never imagined that someone who looked as strong, as self-sufficient as you, could possibly be hurting."

Naruto thinks it is quite ironic that they had both made the exact same assumption about one another.

The exact same mistake.