Next chapter with Arctic Bomber at the helm as the "first boss", coming up! Enjoy =)
DISCLAIMER: Contra is a property Konami, whereas Bomberman is still owned by Hudson Soft despite Konami's permanent takeover; Super Mario World belongs to Nintendo. Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi is owned by Renegade Animation. Any songs "used" throughout the course of this fanfic are properties of their respective owners.
Chapter 3: More like Winter Un-wonderland!
Meanwhile, at a faraway ice castle in Donut Plains, Arctic Bomber spent some time fuming about her recent loss against the two Contras. She thought she had the upper hand during that battle on the tilting island-like platform; unfortunately, she didn't expect Bill and Lance to be able to turn the tables by giving her a taste of her own medicine. Oh, how she hated getting her rear end burned by the lava! She was thinking out loud, not caring if she got my attention (despite that I'm held in a ceiling-mounted, birdcage-like cell).
"Never in my life have I been defeated THAT way!" she complained. "Just look what Bill and Lance did to my skirt! I mean, what's next? That pink-haired girlfriend of yours is gonna blast me in the butt with her bowling ball-sized bombs?!"
"Erm…we're not exactly dating, per se," I answered, "We're merely best friends. But the thing is: she'll probably do just that to you by the time she arrives here."
Arctic Bomber scoffed at my response. "Oh, puh-lease, tell me more, Mister Know-It-All!" Even though I was imprisoned and weapon-less, her sarcasm didn't scare me one bit.
"Look, you're completely missing the point as to why I 'rudely' turned down your offer to become your boyfriend." I emphasized "rudely" in air quotes, much to Arctic Bomber's annoyed look. "You're selfish and immature, not to mention jealous that Ami might be just the right person for me, when the time comes. At least, when we're older."
Rather than get what I just told her, the bratty ice princess brushed me off by gloating that Ami, Bill, and Lance would never get this far. She had already turned Donut Plains into a wintry nightmare with a machine that ran on her ice powers, before we started our vacation on Yoshi's Island.
[Stage BGM: Winter's Here (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Arcade Game)]
Mission 2: Glazed Donut Plains
With Ami, the cute-half of Puffy AmiYumi, safely back in tow, Bill and Lance continue onwards to Donut Plains, unaware that Arctic Bomber was already at work prior to our arrival.
June 10, 20XX
2:45 PM
The three Contras stepped off the bridge, albeit surprised to see Donut Plains being frozen over like a snowstorm just passed by. Ami did not remember the place being that way back in Super Mario World, though she recalled one winter-themed level having existed (only in the "Special World").
"It has to be Arctic Bomber's work," suggested Lance. "I mean, why else would we not recall that in the actual game itself?"
"We can talk about video games some other time," Bill interrupted, "but right now, stopping the snow at the source is our priority – especially when it's supposed to be summer."
An army of snowman-like soldiers flew towards the group, with yellow capes on their backs. Ami, Bill, and Lance jumped on them to knock off the capes, which reverted to the Cape Feathers. With the ability to fly, Ami hopped onto Yoshi's back, while Bill and Lance took flight. Before Yoshi took off, he found an abandoned blue Koopa shell, and ate it to magically sprout wings on his back.
Afterwards, they spent some time flying over a frozen lake, swatting down the jet-like drones along the way. About 10 minutes later, a large ice ball came flying out of nowhere and struck the group, not only taking away their Cape Feather power-ups, but sending them careening towards the ground.
"WE'RE GONNA CRASH!" screamed Ami.
Fortunately, for Ami's group, they fell onto a nearby trampoline. Despite getting hurt a bit from hitting the ground after bouncing on the trampoline, they could still move.
"Whew…what was that thing that hit us just now?"
"My guess is," suggested Bill, "it came from that castle over there. We're close by."
A pair of illegally-modified plow-like tanks approached the Contras, each carrying a turret mounted on top. Recalling from Contra, these tanks could run people over if they were not destroyed quickly. Ami formulated a plan: Bill and Lance would distract the tanks by drawing their fire, and Ami would "bowl a strike" with her Thunder Bombs. The plan succeeded when the tanks exploded into piles of scrap metal, but just as the Contras ran near the castle, an alarm went off with wall-mounted cannons firing icy cannonballs. Bill and Lance could only do little damage to the cannons with their AK-47 machine guns, but Ami's Fire Bombs made short work of them.
"Good thinking, Ami!" said Lance. "I almost forgot that fire melts ice."
Henceforth, Ami melted the icicle-like gate with her Fire Bombs, granting access to Arctic Bomber's second castle. Unlike the last one, it wasn't filled with lava pits – after all, who'd be stupid enough to put lava in an ice castle, anyway? As for the green Yoshi, he stayed outside to guard the egg that held one of his friends inside. For the next 10 minutes, Ami, Bill, and Lance carefully made their way past the Thwomps and Thwimps alike, and jumped their way to the top of the castle (while making sure not to touch the spikes), with or without their Cape Feathers to help them. Throughout the entire trek, Ami was steamed at what Arctic Bomber was planning to do with me.
[End BGM]
[Alert BGM: Black Power (Mega Man Battle Network 5: Double Team DS)]
Finally, the three Contras had reached Arctic Bomber's lair and spotted me in the large birdcage-like cell. While two walls closed up to conceal the arena, Arctic Bomber was shocked to see that they made it all the way through alive.
"Ugh! Why didn't you just give up already?!" ranted Arctic Bomber. "But nevertheless, I was getting bored, so I'll play with you to kill time. Not that I'm sore about my previous loss, but still! Anyway, master Malicious Bomber said losers like you can't pass here!"
"Who I'm sure is likely Red Falcon in disguise," said Bill, pointing at the Red Falcon insignia on the Bomber-girl's helmet.
"Pshh! I don't know what you're talking about."
Lance butted in, "Oh? Well, then why do we see that all-too-familiar insignia on your forehead?"
[End BGM]
[Boss BGM: I'm Not Nice (Super Paper Mario)]
"Aw, forget this! I'm not letting you get inside Vanilla Dome! You'll be frozen to your souls here and NOW!"
That was when Ami stepped in front of Bill and Lance. "You two stay back, she's mine!"
The rogue ice princess attacked by generating two icicle spears with an icy wind, intent on stabbing the one girl she's obviously jealous of. Ami, however, was quick to dodge the jabs, and retaliated by melting the spears with her Fire Bombs, inflicting damage in the process. Arctic Bomber stamped her right foot in a hissy fit, and changed her strategy by throwing her ice bombs around. Bill and Lance batted them away with their AK-47s to keep Ami from freezing up, thus giving her ample time to fight back.
"Feeling too hot from using your bombs?" taunted Arctic Bomber. "You could use a little blizzard to chill out!" Despite her bad ice pun, she unleashed a snowstorm in an effort to freeze Ami, Bill, and Lance. Before they froze up, Ami got out another of her bombs and used the fiery explosions to melt the snow. The female Hate Bomber laughed it up, thinking Ami just blew herself up along with Bill and Lance. But, when the smoke cleared, they weren't harmed at all - thanks to the holy power upgrade that Penny Crygor installed into Ami's Bomberman Watch, much to Arctic Bomber's dismay.
Then the Mistress of the Cold threw a tantrum on the spot by stamping her right foot once again, and combined her snowstorm attack with firing ice shards from her hands. She even formed up a pair of icicle-like spears in her hands with an icy wind. Despite her efforts to kill her pink-haired nemesis, Ami's pumped-up Fire Bombs cancelled the attacks and damaged her. "Okay, enough clowning around!" she shouted, pulling out a bomb with three finger holes atop. "It's high-time I surprised you like you've never been surprised before!"
Ami, instead of feeling intimidated, laughed it up. "This is what you're gonna surprise me with: a bowling ball?"
"It isn't just a bowling ball, Ami…but rather one of my signature moves: the Bowling Bomb! I didn't just spend nearly 5 years trapped in the netherworld, doing nothing! Not only am I the Mistress of the Cold, but I'm also a Bowling Queen!" She paused to arm her bomb by twisting its top half in a 180-degree angle, activating its internal fuse. "You're just about to find out exactly how a bowling pin feels!"
Arctic Bomber got into a bowling position as if she were in a bowling alley, and held out her Bowling Bomb like a real bowling ball. Assuming Ami would just stand there and get blasted along with Bill and Lance like bowling pins, the Mistress of the Cold took aim, and threw the bomb down the middle. Bill and Lance aimed their AK-47s, but Ami signaled for them to stand down and not worry about her. "Okay, ice princess, how about a little Bomb Kick!"
She emphasized "Bomb Kick" by punting the bomb like a soccer ball, sending it right back at Arctic Bomber to blast her in the gut, covering her in soot some more. The moment Ami got out one last Fire Bomb to finish the fight, the Bomber-girl shrieked and tried to run away. The cute half of Puffy AmiYumi, however, gave the cowering villainess a taste of her own medicine by throwing her bomb like a bowling ball. The end result was Arctic Bomber crashing into a wall during her attempted escape, and getting blown up in her still-singed bottom.
[End BGM]
"YYEEEEOOOOWWCH!" screamed Arctic Bomber.
"You can dish it out, but you can't take it!" taunted Ami, flashing a sly wink.
"Argh…I can't believe you beat me at my own game! But…don't think this is the end! You've still got three more Hate Bombers to fight, each being stronger than me…" She shorted out, and exploded to nothing but dust.
[Victory BGM: Boss Defeated (Balloon Kid)]
Bill and Lance congratulated Ami with high-fives, and helped her bring the cage down to free me. "Thank goodness I'm free!" I hugged Ami to express my gratitude. "Now we Four Contras are reunited!"
I went to get one of the large eggs that held another of Yoshi's friends captive, while Ami grabbed a magic plunger to destroy the castle. Bill and Lance pulled down a nearby lever to open up the two walls of the arena, so we could escape. After making our way past the Thwomps and Thwimps, we got out of the castle, and I expressed my gratitude further by jumping onto the plunger. An explosion went off, thus melting the ice castle. It turned out not a moment too soon, that Arctic Bomber's second castle was the main source of the wintry wind that froze Donut Plains over. Everything was back to normal.
"Five more of Yoshi's friends are still held prisoner in the eggs within Dinosaur Land," I said, "but with the four of us together again, we can make our way through alive. Oh, and thanks for finding me. Sorry I wasn't much help while I was caged."
Ami smiled warmly. "Aw, no worries, Aaron! I'm not exactly a professional like I am at playing in a J-pop band, but I'm a better bowler than Arctic Bomber." We laughed with each other, knowing the Mistress of the Cold was probably all talk.
[End BGM]
TO BE CONTINUED…
Next stop, the Vanilla Dome! See you again some other time!