Warnings: Slash, eventual RLSB

Disclaimers: Don't own it.

Notes: Apologies as well as thanks to Rry (I hope the gouging out of your eyes from editing this chapter won't be permanent).

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The Worst Year Yet

By Rekahneko

Chapter 4 – Third Year, Stuck Together

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Sirius Black and James Potter had many different interests but only a few actual obsessions. Pranks were at the top of the list for both boys, and everyone knew to avoid starting a conversation about Quidditch unless they had an extra hour or two to spend. But when it came to their personal life, James' fixation on Lily Evans was starting to become a school joke, at least for the third year students. He had been asking her out regularly since the beginning of the year. She always turned him down, sometimes with a hex, but he never took her answer to heart. James would just grin and say, "Next time, then."

As for Sirius, popular opinion was that he didn't focus on just one individual because he was trying to see how many different students he could be seen with before graduation. He had started to cut a swath through the Hogwarts third year population. It seemed the dark haired boy would flirt with and even date anyone, male or female, whom he felt was good looking enough.

What wasn't common knowledge about the heartthrob was his interest in his dorm-mate Remus Lupin. In fact, most students thought Sirius disliked the studious boy because of how often Remus was the chosen target for pranks. Strangely enough, while Sirius pranked his classmate Severus Snape because of distaste, Remus Lupin was currently a favorite target largely because of unrequited romantic interest.

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Journal Entry, dated December 26th, Third Year

Wow! I got the best gift from my new best friend! This journal is the best ever since I am the only one who can read anything written in it. She is so wonderful – my first and best friend, Lily Evans. Lily is making this year so much better than the last two. The Herbology teacher even mentioned that it was nice to see me smile in class. Apparently I had never done that before this year. How embarrassing that the professor noticed!

Anyhow, I have been too afraid of the Two Evil Gits (and I know you can figure out of whom I speak) reading it to actually keep my journal here at Hogwarts. Those two are much too good at unlocking and revealing spells. They go through my stuff all the time! It is bloody annoying. I do wish they would leave me alone already. I often wonder why they pick on me so much. They mostly leave Longbottom alone and of course Pettigrew (but Pettigrew only because he follows them around like a puppy and does anything they ask). It is so difficult to try and ignore them when they prank me, but doing that is supposed to help, so I keep trying.

Speaking of trying (and they are so very, very trying), why do my very trying roommates have to make me a target for so many of their tricks? It seems like they pull a prank on me at least once a month. Perhaps when they were young, they were bitten by a were-pranker. Oh, I do crack myself up.

Sometimes, I become paranoid and worry they must know my secret and are just trying to mess with me because of it. Of course, if they truly had figured everything out, they probably would have told the whole school or something equally as nasty. I know it isn't true though, that they know I mean. My roommates are loud and obnoxious, and wouldn't be able to keep a secret for longer than a few minutes even if they wanted to. Of course I know I would be doomed if any of them did find out. I fret about it incessantly.

Anyhow, I have to say that having this journal is a new way to get one over on the Black and Potter. I can say all the horrible things I want about them in here and they will never be able to read about it. Unless they somehow manage to create a Polyjuice Potion of me and then waste it on searching through my things. Which would be odd, even for those two.

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It was the middle of History of Magic class, and Sirius was doing his best to stay awake. Not for the lecture of course, but because this was a prime time for him to be planning pranks and surreptitiously gazing at Remus Lupin. So far, he had written down twelve different ideas to consider, including exploding everyone's pumpkin juice at the same time, creating a love potion for the giant squid, and finding a talking spell for the toilets. Sirius had also noted at that Remus bit his lip right before he crossed out something in his furiously written notes, that Remus' hair had several different colors in it, depending on the light, and that Remus had a fresh scar on the back of his hand.

Sirius was busy trying to figure out how he could get the toilets to comment on things in the same way magical mirrors did, when he was hit in the head with a balled up parchment. He opened what was obviously a note from his friend.

It read, I have never been so bored in my life. I wonder if Binns was any more exciting when he was alive.

He wrote back, Doubtful. Hey, have you ever noticed that Lupin gets sick and hurt a lot? He's a pretty frail sort of a kid I guess. Sleeps a lot too. Or at least he stays behind his curtains. There are some days it seems like I don't see him at all. Strange.

Nope, I haven't noticed. I'll take your word on it. You certainly are the expert when it comes to him.

Frowning at Remus' tired face, Sirius wondered for a moment before shrugging his shoulders and turning back to the note from his friend.

So, Sirius, you going soft on us or what?

What are you talking about?

I see how you look at him, don't think I haven't noticed. And speaking of which, you should wipe the drool from your chin. Are you going to finally take him permanently off our pranking list or what?

Sirius wondered if he should pretend he didn't know what his best friend was talking about. He sighed. No, he stays on the list. I am not going soft.

After a moment, Sirius added, I don't want people to know I like him since he always turns me down. My reputation will be ruined! Plus, at least he pays me some sort of attention when he is pranked. Sometimes.

You know it isn't going to help him change his mind, right? James made a face at his friend when he finished writing the question.

We never prank her, and she still doesn't want anything to do with you. I don't see how either way makes any difference really. Plus, it is fun! Sirius grinned over at his friend and mimed throwing a dungbomb at the teacher.

Sirius, you are crazy. James returned his friend's grin.

If I had a sickle for every time someone told me that, I would be a rich man.

You are a rich man.

See what I mean?

Life was pretty good for Sirius Black, even if it wasn't exactly perfect.

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Spring, Third Year

Two young men were involved in an animated discussion as they made their way awkwardly down a deserted corridor of Hogwarts School of Wizardry. The reason for their slow progress was a rather peculiar and discomfiting binding spell. The two boys were now attached to each other, left side to right side, which made walking a rather complicated experience.

"I just wish we didn't have to go to Madame Pomfrey to get fixed up. Under which group of spells do you think this one would be classified? If I had only been able to hear the incantation…" Severus Snape sighed, frustrated with the situation. He was almost used to strange things happening to him at this point though, as he seemed to be one of the favorite targets of the most infamous pranksters Hogwarts had ever known.

"Too bad it wasn't a potion they hit us with. If it had been, I am sure you could have whipped something up to fix us. You are so brilliant at potions." Remus Lupin flashed his very best smile over at the pale youth next to him.

Pausing in the hallway, Severus looked carefully at the sandy haired boy next to him. "Lupin. Are you flirting with me?" He proceeded to raise eyebrow in pointed inquiry.

Remus had to stop as well since they were literally joined at the hip. He hoped the darkness of the hallway hid his blush. "Umm, no?"

A snort of disbelief was the reply.

Remus continued, trying not to sound as embarrassed as he felt. "I wouldn't dare flirt with you. Malfoy is terrifying!" He managed a small grin and sent a sideways glance through the curtain of his hair.

"Yes, well…" There was a shrug and something vaguely resembling a chuckle came from Remus' companion as he made the noncommittal reply.

Severus thinks I am funny! And that disturbingly seductive voice… Lucky Malfoy.

"Speaking of Malfoy - if Madame Pomfrey can't get us unattached right away, I wanted to ask you to tell my parents that I love them and that I want yellow flowers at my funeral."

This time there was an actual laugh from the dark haired boy. "Lucius isn't that bad. Usually."

The two study partners shared a smile and continued chatting as they carefully made their way to the infirmary together. They never noticed the shadows flickering behind them as Sirius crept along, listening to their easy conversation and fuming silently under his friend's invisibility cloak.

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As the footsteps of a sixth year Gryffindor girl disappeared upstairs, the two solitary occupants of the Gryffindor common room, finally alone, started discussing their recent exploits.

"James, they were having fun! Together! And Snape laughed! I didn't even know he could do that. It isn't fair." Sirius whined at his friend as he complained about their latest prank.

James rolled his eyes. "Sirius, the prank went fine. Everyone thought it was funny and we were amazingly brilliant. What more can you ask for?"

"Well, how about that Snivellus would be miserable instead of practically getting propositioned over the whole thing? It's just not fair. I hate him even more than I did before." He paced back and forth across the room, brows drawn together and lips pursed.

"You're just pouting because Lupin doesn't fancy you. Maybe we could take him off the list. Somehow, I don't think pranking him will help Lupin appreciate you more."

"Well after today, he is right on the top! Right after Snivellus anyhow. Flirting with him and not me!"

"Those two always seem to be at the top, Sirius. Maybe you should just get over him," James offered helpfully.

"Like you have gotten over Evans?" Sirius smirked at his best friend.

"That's different. Evans will eventually cave and admit the depth of her feelings for me. Lupin doesn't have any feelings for you." James sniggered at the death stare aimed his way.

"At least you know he would consider it anyhow."

At Sirius' confused look, James continued with a huff, "You said he was flirting with Snape. Who is a bloke."

A beaming smile replaced the pout. "Oh yeah!"

"So you don't have to change your gender to get Lupin to be interested in you, just everything else about yourself." James laughed as Sirius hurled himself over the couch to wrestle his friend to the ground.

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Next Time:

"So," she said, not so deftly changing the subject. "Was kissing as brilliant as you always thought?"