Warnings: Slash, eventual RLSB

Disclaimers: Don't own it. So sad.

Notes: Thanks to Oony!

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The Worst Year Yet

By Rekahneko

Chapter 5 – Fourth Year, Jellyfish Hats

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By fourth year, Lily had discovered his lycanthropy and yet stayed his friend. This confidence booster helped Remus try out a new tactic when it came to his dorm mates. He not only spelled his trunk to lock out his roommates, but also delved into all sorts of books for information on how to help protect himself and his property from the two troublemakers. He figured out how to put passwords on his parchment and his robes now stayed the same color no matter what spells were thrown at them. Remus was even able to plan ahead sometimes by actively using his acute werewolf hearing to try and listen in on Sirius and James planning pranks. It helped quite a bit, but not as much as he wished.

Still, life was much better than before. He had a best friend in Lily, he had experienced his first kiss (with the studious Slytherin boy) and his first fight (with the studious Slytherin boy's ex-boyfriend). Spending the weekend in the hospital wing re-growing a few bones helped him get over the crush rather more quickly than he would have imagined.

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Dear Mum and Dad,

Thanks for the letter, I will let Lily know you said hello. Didn't I tell you that you would like her? I know it was risky to make friends and everything, but she is okay with the whole werewolf thing, just like I always hoped. It is so great to have at least one person who knows and who I don't have to pretend with. Madame Pomfrey doesn't count nor does Dumbledore. They are old! Madame Pomfrey must be at least thirty or fifty or something.

The real reason I am writing is that tomorrow you will get a note from the school and I wanted to tell you about it first. I just want to say that it isn't entirely my fault. Malfoy completely started it. He was just jealous because I was spending some time with one of his friends. Or something like that anyhow. But from now on, I will be staying as far away from both of them as I possibly can. And yes, I am fine. It isn't like I'm not used to the hospital wing or anything.

I am enclosing some Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans for Snuffles. They are some of my least favorite kinds and I don't want to waste candy; that must be some kind of deadly sin, right? I remember that Snuffles likes the haggis tasting ones as well as the cottage cheese ones so I included a few of each, as well as some other flavors. Let me know if he likes any of them.

Well, I need to take another dose of the most horrible medicine known to man. I will write you more later.

See you soon and don't be too mad,

Love, Your Favorite and Only Son, Remus

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"How are you?" Lily was standing next to the corner bed in the hospital wing, its occupant looking more than a bit worse for wear. As soon as she found out that Remus had been hurt, Lily had rushed off to see what had happened.

"Okay, I guess. I've been in here for more serious things," he added, grimacing.

"I heard about the fight."

"What did you hear," Remus asked nervously, winding the edge of the sheet in his hands as he wondered what this would do to his sterling reputation.

"Just that Malfoy beat you up."

"Oh. That's not so bad, I suppose. I guess it could have been worse."

"Tell me what really happened before I expire of curiosity!" Lily bounced up and down on her toes, agitated.

Before speakng, Remus looked around to make certain they were alone. "Severus asked me to meet him on the second floor charms classroom after class, and when I got there, well…"

"Well, what?" she asked, impatiently.

"He kissed me," Remus muttered.

Lily's eyebrows rose. "Just like that? Did he say anything? Did you kiss him back?"

"Yes, no, and yes."

"And then?"

"And then Malfoy arrived, hexed me like there was no tomorrow, and yelled at Severus for kissing me, even though the two of them had broken up. As they left, it sounded like they were going to get back together."

Lily winced. "That's pretty harsh, Remus."

"Well, Severus did sort of look back at me for a second kind of apologetically. I think." Remus squeezed his eyes shut for a moment and then looked around the sterile, white walled room morosely. "Merlin, I'm pathetic."

"After I get a hold of him…" Lily trailed off, eyes glittering with anger. Remus almost felt sorry for Severus and the toungue lashing in store for him from his childhood friend. "He's just an ass. Forget it."

"I don't think I'll be forgetting it for a long while." Remus picked at the corner of a bandage which covered up a patch rather nasty looking orange blisters.

"So," she said, not so deftly changing the subject. "Was kissing as brilliant as you always thought?"

"Well, it was nice, but it wasn't really all that brilliant. It was kind of awkward and sort of embarrassing." Remus was red in the face after saying this.

"Maybe it was that way because it wasn't the right person."

"Perhaps," Remus replied a bit doubtfully. "I just have the kind of luck where my first kiss gets broken up by the ex-boyfriend."

"As did our Potions study group."

Groaning, Remus put his face in his hands. "I am going to fail Potions now. My life is officially over."

"Trust you to be more worried about your grades than anything else," Lily said, huffing in amusement, anger temporarily forgotten.

Remus just shook his head without looking up.

"It'll be fine with just the two of us. You and I will just find another place to study. In fact, I think I have just the location. It's near the Gryffindor common room, so no Slytherins will be skulking about at all. There is this long hallway with a tiny desk area at the very end. Not very pretty, but quiet anyhow, and no one is ever there."

Sighing, Remus conceded, "I suppose that sounds nice."

"It's going to be okay." Lily put a comforting arm around her friend, receiving a mumbled thanks in return.

"You know, you should probably tell your parents at some point. I mean, not about Severus, but about the fact that you are interested in boys." She tried, gently.

"At some point," he conceded. "Maybe."

"They'll stop trying to set you up with that annoying neighbor girl that you're always talking about. The one that Snuffles has a problem with."

"Snuffles is a problem."

"Yeah, but he's so cute! He is your very own furry little problem."

Remus smiled, his first all afternoon. "He was just defending me. Snuffles knows I can't stand the girl, and he decided to make sure she wouldn't bother me for a while."

"A strange way to go about defending you. Dragging her clothes through an anthill while everyone was swimming…"

"I almost feel bad for her. But then she opens her mouth. Remind me to get Snuffles some treats by the way. For a furry little problem, he is awfully handy to have around sometimes."

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Journal Entry – October, Fourth Year

I am delighted to report that my new plans for avoiding the Twin Prats' tricks have started paying off. In fact, just today I overheard the two of them talking about a prank they were going to try on me. Now, when tomorrow comes and they distract me and dump whatever potion it is that they just finished into my pumpkin juice, I will be ready. If I spill it 'accidentally,' they won't catch on that I knew ahead of time.

It was funny last week when they hexed me with a spell they thought would be quite a laugh. Little did they realize that I had overheard them and prepared beforehand. When they hit me with the knee-reversing hex, I was able to calmly cast the counter-curse and walk away without a backwards glance (which would have been really hard to do had my knees still been reversed). Sirius was so frustrated. It made my entire week!

The new spells to keep my trunk locked aren't as successful, sadly. They are very good at finding counter spells (just like Lily, I suppose) and so far, I have only managed a week and a half before they cracked it. That is okay though, I will not be discouraged.

Currently, I am researching ways to keep my clothing (my robes in particular) the same color no matter what. They do love that stupid dye hex. Too bad I don't think there is a way to protect my hair from color changing spells. Of course, now I know how to at least change the spell color, even if I can't undo it. Maybe there are other ways to protect myself other than spying on them and learning all the counterspells. We will see. As always, Lily has helped me out.

On top of research support, Lily has assisted me with a few ideas for when someone questions my monthly absences. Her best idea for an excuse is that I have a parent with a long term illness and I get special permission to visit them on a regular basis. This means I don't have to remember which relative is ill or just died or whatever. She is amazing! I can't help but wish that the rest of the world was more like my friend Lily, understanding and accepting (did I mention brilliant?). Too bad she is a girl.

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"It looks like Lupin isn't here again tonight. Where do you think he goes? I hope he doesn't have a boyfriend. Or a girlfriend for that matter." Sirius grimaced at the idea.

"Oh! I knew there was something I was forgetting to tell you." James smacked himself lightly on the forehead. "I heard about why Lupin leaves school sometimes. Apparently, he has a sick mother. Something long term and very severe. He goes to see her."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. I heard it from Marlene McKinnon, who is best friends with Bertha Jorkins, who talked to Cynthia Pucey, who heard it straight from Lily Evans."

"Wow. How depressing. No wonder he never talks about it. So what does his mum have?"

"McKinnon didn't say."

"Well, I'm certainly not asking him. That'd be a pretty awkward conversation."

James nodded his agreement.

"You know what he needs? Lupin needs something to cheer him up. I bet if we plan a good prank on him, it will be just the thing."

"I'm not sure pranking him will make him feel better, Sirius."

"Remember how much more cheerful he looked after we pranked Malfoy earlier this year? He almost smiled at me!"

"That's different. Everyone loves to see a Malfoy in a dress and high heels." James grinned.

Nodding his head in agreement, Sirius smirked. "What if it's a funny prank? Everyone likes funny things."

James rolled his eyes and grinned. "So what were you thinking of doing?"

"Well, I was thinking maybe we should charm a jellyfish to stick on his head like a hat."

"Where did you get that idea?"

"I accidentally listened in History of Magic. Apparently there was this guy, Uric the Oddball, who did all these strange things, including wearing a jellyfish on his head. I'm thinking of looking up more about him, just to get more ideas. Heck, Lupin might even recognize the reference and realize how brilliantly intelligent I am."

"I think Uric the Oddball might have a Chocolate Frog card or something because he kind of sounds familiar. But where are we going to get a jellyfish?"

"Not sure."

"And how will we charm it to stay on someone's head?"

"I dunno."

"How are we going to make sure it doesn't constantly sting Lupin?"

"No clue."

"Remind me how brilliantly intelligent you are again?" James asked.

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Next Time:

"What a tragedy such good looking guys have to be so completely annoying and bratty."