Thank you so much for the reviews thus far, they've made me very happy. :) This story seems to be well liked so far. I hope I can keep up with expectations.

I would like to thank 5SecstoThrowItFB (hope I didn't spell that wrong) for the idea of Pippin asking stupid questions that he already knows the answers to at very dire moments. Namely while being chased down by the Balrog. *cough* *cough* Silly Pippin. Hope you all like. :)

Gandalf pushed against the stone doors to Moria. He had been saying every word he could think of, in every known language. He finally gave it up, sitting down in a huff. "Oh, it's useless."

"Let's see… is it a simple word?" Merry held the 8-Ball so he and Pippin could both see the answer in the moonlight.

Outlook Good.

"Is it… a food?"

Yes Definitely.

"It's a riddle." Frodo stood. "Speak 'friend' and enter. What's the Elvish word for 'friend'?" he turned to the old wizard.

"Mellon."

The sound of stone scraping on stone told everyone that the password had worked. Well, besides the obvious swinging open of the doors, of course.

"No one seriously thought of that?" Frodo mumbled.

"So much for being a food." Gimli mocked Merry and Pippin.

"But melon is a type of food." The latter grinned.

The Dwarf open and closed his mouth for a moment before growling and storming through the doorway. However, he didn't stay mad for long, because just then he had to gloat to Legolas. "Soon, Master Elf, you will enjoy the fabled hospitality of the Dwarves. Roaring fires, malt beer, ripe meat off the bone!" Gandalf lit his staff. "This, my friend, is the home of my cousin Balin."

"I think friend is a bit much at this time." Legolas ran a hand self-consciously through his hair.

Gimli continued unhindered. "And they call it a mine. A mine!"

"This is no mine. It's a tomb." Boromir said observing the skeletons strewn around the room.

"No… no." Gimli wailed. "NO!"

Legolas yanked an arrow out of a skull. "Goblins." Everyone readied their weapons.

"We make for the Gap of Rohan. We should never have come here." Boromir looked to Aragorn.

"FORGET IT! WE ARE NOT MAKING FOR THE GAP OF ROHAN! THAT SUBJECT HAS READY BEEN CLEARED UP." Gimli thundered.

"But-"

"END OF DISCUSSION!"

"All right. All right."

While they had their little squabble, or rather Gimli's overreaction, Merry had leaned on the doorframe. It suddenly shifted; bring down practically the entire wall.

"Leave it to Merry and Pippin to be the only ones to able to destroy something that has stood the passage of time." Boromir sighed once the dust and stone had settled. Everyone else nodded in silent agreement.

"We now have but one choice." Gandalf shot the said Hobbits a look as he relit his staff. "We must face the long dark of Moria. Be on your guard. There are older and fouler things then Orcs, in the deep places of the world. Quietly now. It's a four-day journey to the other side."

"Four days!?" Pippin shouted.

"Shh!" everyone hissed.

"Sorry. But four days? Maybe we should have stayed on the mountain."

Gandalf lifted his staff and whacked him on the head had hard as he dared. He didn't want the hollow sound to alert anything nearby.

O~o~O

Steep stairs. More steep stairs. Three passages. Three choices. No memories. Great. Just great.

Merry and Pippin sat asking the 8-ball questions, while Gandalf plopped down to try to think which passage they should take, and the other built a fire. He and Frodo discussed Sméagol after hearing his distant rambling about the three missing precious's.

"He's mad." Frodo decided. "Sméagol is mad."

"Well, just from the fact he appeared way to early says that. Or he's just very lost."

"My money's on mad."

"Mine too."

"Are we going to be leaving anytime soon?" Gimli called up to them.

"No." Pippin answered.

Gimli's roar reverberated off the walls and ceiling. Loud whispering came from the others who were obviously trying to keep Gimli from killing the young Hobbit. Even though we're all certain they would like to do the same.

"Ah! It's that way." Gandalf motioned toward right passage.

"He's remembered!" Merry jumped up, and made his way to the wizard.

"No. But the air doesn't smell so foul down here. If in doubt, Meriadoc, always follow your nose."

Once they had made their way through it, they came to rather large extremely high room thingy: Dwarrowdelf. If those seemly thousands of pillars could talk, the stories they could tell. The Fellowship all stared in awe for a few moments before Gandalf ushered them to move along. Once they got across, something caught Gimli's eye and sent him running ahead.

"Gimli!" Gandalf exclaimed.

"No." He cried stopping in front of a tomb. "No!" he slid to his knees. "Oh, no."

"Here lies Balin, son of Fundin, Lord of Moria." Gandalf entered and read the words off the tomb. "He is dead, then. It's as I feared." he took his head off and handed both it and his staff to Pippin. Way to go, Gandalf, you obvious didn't learn anything from last time. He bent down and moved the skeletal hand off the book it was clutching. He lifted the book, and dirt and few pages fell from it. He began skimming it.

"We must move on. We cannot linger." Legolas muttered to Aragorn.

"'They have taken the bridge and the second hall.'" Gandalf read aloud. "'We have barred the gates, but cannot hold them for long. The ground shakes. Drums… Drums in the deep. We cannot get out. A Shadow moves in the dark. We cannot get out. They are coming.'"

BOOM!

Everyone whipped around before realizing it had come from Pippin's direction. He had his eyes closed, face scrunched up, and hand reaching towards the floor. Gandalf's staff was lying there and the well that had had a skeleton on it was now gone.

"Fool of a Took!" Gandalf slammed the book closed. "I have you do one simple thing," he tossed the book aside and snatched his hat and staff up. "And you still mess it up!"

"I'm sorry." Pippin squeaked.

"Sorry isn't gonna cut it if we have legions of Orc upon us."

"If they didn't know we were here, they do now." Boromir spoke.

Gandalf would have responded to that, but about that time, a drum started thumping from the deep.

"Hold on a second!" Frodo was staring at a piece of parchment. "If we already know what's going to happen, why don't we just run? Avoid the whole fighting-and-thinking-Frodo's-dead mess?"

Everyone else withdrew pieces of parchment from their pockets as well. "We wouldn't have time. Says here only moments after the drums start beating, the Orc appear. And we don't have another exit." Gandalf scratched his head. Gimli grabbed Gandalf's staff and shook it.

BOOM!

"Now we have an exit." he said gruffly. Boromir rushed and closed the door off that they had come through.

"Works for me." Gandalf lead the others through the still smoking hole.

O~o~O

"Gandalf! What is that big thing chasing us?" Pippin shrieked, as they one by one dashed across the bridge.

"Good heavens, Peregrin Took! Do you ever listen to a word anyone says?" Gandalf shouted in exasperation.

"It says no." Merry suddenly said.

"What?"

"The ball… I-it said no to your question."

Gandalf face-palmed.

"Let me see it." Pippin seized it. "Um… Is the big thing chasing us a Balrog?"

Signs Point To Yes.

"I've already told you it was!" Gandalf screamed.

"Oh."

"'Oh.' All he can say is 'oh'." Gandalf stopped and turned to face the Balrog.

"WILL GANDALF SHOUT HIS FAMOUS LINE?" Pippin shook the 8-Ball up.

Outlook Good.

Gandalf stared over the edge of the bridge. Tempting. The Balrog claimed his attention again with one long and mighty roar.

"I am a servant of the Secret Fire, wielder of the flame of Anor." He rose his staff light intensifying on it. "The dark fire will not avail you, flame of Udun!" The Balrog raised its sword and brought it down onto Gandalf staff. Staff naturally winning. "Go back to the Shadow." The creature took a step out onto the bridge, cracking its whip. "You shall not pass!" he brought his staff down onto the bridge.

This caused the Balrog to take a single step back before it lunged onto the bride. Its weight being too much, it caused it crumble beneath it. It howled as it fell. Gandalf turned to join the others when the whip cracked and wrapped around his leg pulling him down. He finally words before falling were: 'Fly, you fools.'

Sorry this chapter was so long… I couldn't find a good place to cut it.

Just so you know. If you guys send me ideas for this story, but I don't use them; please don't get mad or anything. It may just simply be because I have something already worked out or just didn't think it went well with the flow of the story. Or with my *cough* horrible *cough* writing skills couldn't find a good way to put it in. Or by some slim chance was already gonna use something similar. I apologize in advance. *hugs*