DISCLAIMER: I do not own Glee, nor am I associated with it or RIB. I don't own anything - there we go.

Don't Run Away

By: xSlythStratasfaction

Warning: Spoilers for Season 4 - an AU of 4x07 on. Basically a 'what if' Blaine transferred back to Dalton like he was planning instead of being talked out of it like Sam was able to do in the actual episode.

POSSIBLE TRIGGER WARNING: Suicidal thoughts are somewhat mentioned; also there's a sex scene that could be considered dub-con (sorry if it seems like I don't know my terms; I don't write smut and this is a first for me.)

"You know, when Blaine showed up here last month, you'd think someone killed his dog or something."

Kurt choked back another sob, aggressively wiping at his eyes as he curled in tighter on himself. He was still sitting at the bottom of the staircase, his body too exhausted to move even after Blaine had left him there over fifteen minutes ago. He couldn't bear the thought of dealing with Sebastian Smythe right now, but there he was standing in front of Kurt like he had something to say and Kurt needed to listen.

"Go away, Sebastian. I don't want to hear it."

"You seem to think I care whether or not you listen to me. Well... newsflash, Anna Wintour: I don't." Sebastian moved from his spot in front of Kurt and took a seat on the steps. Had Kurt been less emotional, he would've been a little freaked out by how cordial his once arch enemy was being; however, the action went unnoticed and for that, Sebastian was glad. "I don't know exactly what happened between you and Blaine, but whatever it was killed him. To be honest, I never expected him to come back here… to transfer, I mean. And yet, here he is."

Kurt stayed silent, head tucked against his knees as he listened and sniffled, willing his tears to just subside.

Sebastian continued, "I don't know what your little group of peasant misfits did to him back at McKinley, but he didn't seem too concerned to leave them and come back to Dalton. Then again, I'm not too surprised; they were probably only friends with him because of you, right? …no wonder he came back."

Kurt looked up, his slightly puffy, reddened eyes locking with Sebastian's. He glared, "Blaine had friends at McKinley. What he doesn't have is any sort of friend here."

"Hmm, well considering how angry your little friends got at him after Sectionals, I'd say the closest thing he's got to having a friend are the boys here."

"What do you mean?"

"Oh, nothing… except for the fact that the Nude Erections went a little haywire following their loss. Must've hurt to come in second after being number one in the nation, am I right?"

Kurt shook his head, "They wouldn't-"

"Oh, but they did. It's a good thing that I was there to drag Blaine offstage because I'm sure a few of those kids would've torn his face off had they had the chance. They really weren't pleased with him."

"Him singing with you guys caused them to lose. I guess I could understand them being angry."

"Yeah, but yelling the things they did at him? Calling him a pathetic loser, saying things to him about how he never deserved you, saying he was a coward for coming back here… grade A stuff. Great friends. Just the best."

Kurt's mouth fell open. He looked back up at Sebastian and frowned when he noticed the sincere look in his once enemy's eyes; Sebastian was telling the truth, New Directions had turned on Blaine.

Oh God...

"They really said all that stuff?"

Sebastian rolled his eyes, "Listen, Kurt. I'm not here to be your friend or beg you to get back with Blaine or anything. But what I am telling you is that something strange is going on and your friends haven't helped Blaine out at all. If anything, they just made things worse and to be completely honest, I'm not sure if you being here is a good idea either."

"I just want to talk to him."

"Funny because from what I heard, you didn't want anything to do with Blaine a few weeks ago."

Kurt scowled, "Of course I didn't. He cheated on me! I needed some time to think, but he just kept on calling and texting and- wait, how did you know that?"

"I have my resources," Sebastian countered. "Plus, it pays to have Blaine as a roommate." He reached into his pocket and grabbed out a single key, holding it out to Kurt. "I want to know what's going on with him just as much as you do, Kurt. We're on the same team this time. Blaine's my friend and even though I've done some shitty things to him – fuck, to both of you – in the past, I just want him to get better... and you- you're the key to that, I guess."

"Sebastian-"

"Just go talk to him. I'm not going to promise that he'll hear you out because he never even listens to me these days, but you're his best bet. Maybe you could let him do a little talking too."

Kurt nodded, standing up from the floor to dust off his pants. He wiped at his eyes a few more times before he reached out and took the dorm key from Sebastian's hand.

"Thanks. I never thought I'd see the day where I didn't want to strangle you, but- thanks anyway."

"The feeling's mutual, now go. Room number's on the keyring."

Sebastian stood back, watching as Kurt disappeared down the hall and off to the dormitories. Deep down, despite his once dire hate for Kurt, he hoped that Kurt would be the one to finally break through to Blaine and find out exactly what was going on.

Because Blaine was just plain scary now. Scary.

::

Blaine unlocked the door to his dorm room and stepped inside, hands flying up to loosen up the knot of his tie as he tugged it away from his neck and threw it across the room.

Kurt was back.

Kurt Hummel, his ex-boyfriend, the boy whose heart he carelessly shattered just months ago, was back and looking to talk to him and instead of waiting to hear what Kurt had to say (or even trying to truly apologize again like he really needed to), he just dismissed Kurt with a simple goodbye and walked away.

You couldn't even man up and talk to him. Pathetic.

He raised his hand to his heart and pressed down, feeling the quick, erratic beats beneath his hand as he struggled to steady his breathing and calm himself before he caused himself to have a heart attack. Sighing, he stalked across the room and took a seat on his bed, dropping his hand from his chest to instead grab up one of his pillows and hug it tightly to his body.

He wasn't sure what was going on with him at that very moment, but it didn't feel good and it eerily reminded him of the last time he felt so wretched.

::

Eli's hands were trailing up Blaine's sides, his lips connected to Blaine's jawline as his hips thrust forward in a mad attempt to lessen the space between them. Blaine groaned beneath him, his body beginning to tremble as Eli started to undo the button and zipper of his jeans. Soon, cool air and the feeling of hot skin pressed against Blaine's erection and he moaned softly, his eyes shooting open at the intense reaction his body was getting.

This was all wrong. This was so wrong.

Eli worked his hips faster, a hand coming down to grip Blaine's hipbone as he panted above him, "God, Blaine, you are gorgeous."

His praises, however, fell on deaf ears; instead, all Blaine could hear was the sound of Kurt saying the same words on the very night they lost their virginity to each other. He closed his eyes, the tears he wanted to shed beginning to well behind his lashes as he quivered under Eli's hands. He could feel how close Eli was getting to his orgasm and all he could think was, 'Please let it end soon.' He knew he should've stopped this, should've pulled away from Eli the second the other boy kissed him, but he had been feeling so left behind, so unwanted, and he just wanted to feel loved again.

And look where it got him.

He was so stupid. So, so stupid. The second Kurt found out about this, he knew their relationship would be over; he had just broken their trust and now it was the end for them. Kurt would break up with him and never look back and not only would Blaine lose the love of his life, but he would also be losing his best friend.

He whimpered, his mouth still sealed shut, and tears ran down the sides of his face and wet his hair. Above him, Eli groaned out in pleasure and quickened the rutting of his hips, one hand reaching down between the two of them; he wrapped his hand around both of their cocks and jerked, moaning loudly. His eyes were closed tight and Blaine wondered to himself if Eli would even continue this if he knew how badly Blaine was falling apart beneath him.

"Fuck, Blaine!"

Blaine's eyes squeezed shut even tighter than they had before as his orgasm overcame unexpectedly. His body jerked upwards, pressing close to Eli's as he quietly came with a tiny whine. Eli shouted in pleasure just seconds later, coming all over Blaine's chest, his hand falling away from them as his hips slowed their motions.

"That was amazing," the other boy breathed, opening his eyes to look at Blaine's face once he was mostly down from his high. His breath stuttered in his throat though when he caught the look of absolute misery on Blaine's face. "Hey... you okay?"

Blaine swallowed heavily, blinking back the onset of fresh tears that began to trickle down his face. He felt Eli roll away from him and then off of the bed, only to return seconds later with a handful of some tissue. Carefully, Eli wiped himself clean and then turned to clean off Blaine as well.

"Sorry for the mess," he teased as he balled up the tissue and tossed it across the room. "You sure you're okay?"

"Can I- can I have some water?" Blaine croaked out, slowly bringing himself to sit up properly. He waited until Eli quit staring at him and left the room before he tucked himself back into his boxers and zipped up his pants. He sat still for a few minutes, listening as the water in the bathroom ran, and that's when he felt it: the strong wave of nausea. It smashed into him within seconds and he knew he was on the verge of having a breakdown. All he could feel was how hard it was to breathe, how tingly awful his skin felt, and how much everything burned, like he needed to rip off his own skin in order to feel right again. He reached down and grabbed up his shirt, which had gotten discarded seconds after Eli had brought him into the room, and tugged it on as fast as he could, cradling his pounding head in his hands once he was fully dressed.

He could hear Eli behind him, stepping back into the room with that glass of water that he just had to have. "You okay?" Eli questioned again.

"No."

"Is it because I don't look at all like my profile picture?" Eli asked jokingly, not realizing the anguish that the boy sitting on his bed was having.

"I'm sorry. I- I have to go," Blaine whimpered, rising from the bed to grab his phone and wallet off of Eli's desk. He didn't wait to see if Eli was following him, he didn't turn around... he just kept on walking. He walked right out of the door, climbed into his car, and drove approximately six miles away from Eli's home before he pulled over, hopped out of the car, and threw up on the side of the road, bawling his eyes out as he did so.

Because, once again, he had just fucked everything up.

As usual.

::

An awful, swirling feeling built up in Blaine's stomach and he jumped up from the bed, dropping his pillow on the floor as he ran into the en suite bathroom and fell to the floor, vomiting violently in the toilet. He choked and gasped, eyes burning with tears as he wretched into the commode, and when he was finally finished, he slid down to the floor in a boneless heap, praying to whoever heard him to just kill him now and end his pain.

He closed his eyes and draped an arm over his stomach, his entire body still quaking with nausea. "Why is he here?" He murmured to himself, feeling that ever present coldness leech back into his heart as he remembered the hurt, angry looks that had passed over Kurt's face the last few times they had been able to see each other.

He remembered the awful text he received only weeks ago, the one Kurt had sent him after Blaine had bombarded his inbox with apologies. Blaine had only began sending the messages after he woke up from a nightmare about that night with Eli and no matter how many times he tried to stop himself from sending yet another I'm sorry, please talk to me message to Kurt, he couldn't help himself and sent more. And then Kurt finally messaged him back; the little ding of Blaine's phone making his heart race in anticipation.

He had opened the text with a hopeful heart and then wished he had never touched his phone at all.

It's over, Blaine. Stop contacting me. We're done.

He had been sitting in the middle of a meeting when it came and he couldn't bear to not read it before the hour ended, so he opened it up right then and there in the room... and then when he saw those awful words there on his phone screen, he ended the meeting and left.

He couldn't handle it, much like he couldn't handle everything right now.

So he ran.

He was always running, from people, from himself. It was a never ending process, one that always exhausted him, but never stopped. Blaine Anderson had a knack for packing up and disappearing when the going got rough and of course, that's exactly what he did that day Kurt ceased all contact. He went home, sat in his living room staring at his phone, at the final message Kurt had sent, and waited until his parents came home.

::

"Mom?"

"Oh, hi honey! How are- Blaine? Is something wrong?"

"I want to go back to Dalton."

"Wait... you want to what?"

"Go back to Dalton. I can't- McKinley's not- it'd be better for me at Dalton."

"But Blaine," his mother walked up to him, gently cupping his cheek in her hand. "I thought you liked it there; you loved McKinley last year and- oh no, is this about Kurt, isn't it? Honey, what happened?"

Blaine stood still, staring at the ground as he ignored his mother's concerns. He could hear her rattling on and on about him not eating enough and how he never slept anymore, how she could hear him crying at night and couldn't figure out why.

But now she knew, thanks to his silence, and now she knew he was a failure at everything in life. He couldn't stay in one school for too long without wanting to leave, he couldn't keep friends, he couldn't get anybody to love him, and he couldn't keep his boyfriend because he just couldn't keep it in his fucking pants. Her son was a failure.

He sighed, "Dalton's for the best, mom. Just think about it."

And she did, she discussed it with her husband ("About time that kid got over that pathetic excuse of a boyfriend; he'd be better off at Dalton anyway. He'd get a better education there and have a better chance at getting into a good college than he would at that awful public school.") and they both decided - in Blaine's best interests, of course – that Dalton was the way to go.

Within days and with a few important phone calls, they had him all set to head back to private school and with a cold, expressionless demeanor, Blaine stepped back into the Academy not as Blaine Anderson, but as Blaine Warbler, the person everyone knew him to be, the perfect showman.

::

Kurt stepped into the room, his eyes sweeping the area as he took in the discarded tie and the pillow laying on the floor. The room smelled strongly of vomit and his stomach lurched in response as he looked over at the open bathroom door. He tiptoed over to the bathroom and almost gasped in horror when he saw Blaine's body flat on the floor, his eyes closed tight and mouth moving silently as he muttered things to himself. Kurt crept closer to see what he could decipher from Blaine's mumbling and felt his heart stop when he heard Blaine whisper, "I wish I was dead."

"Oh Blaine, no-" he said brokenly, mentally berating himself for speaking when Blaine's eyes popped open and fell upon him, his face contorting into something akin to shock and horror when he saw who was watching him.

Then, as quickly as it happened, Blaine's facial expression changed to one that was completely unreadable to Kurt; his mask had come down and it broke Kurt's heart yet again to see it.

Blaine was hiding from him and Kurt really wasn't sure he knew how to find him again.

A/N: Sorry for the delay. I had an MRI on my brain yesterday and my thoughts were completely elsewhere instead of on trying to finish this chapter. I do hope that it doesn't suck as much as it feels like it does (especially the ending - I didn't know how to end this chapter without going too far into the next one.) Plus, I kept going back to change things and nothing sounded right. But oh well... let me know what you thought!