Children Shouldn't Live Like This – Chapter 15
The room was stuffy, after having been closed to the world for around half a year. Dust had gathered on the curtains, the bed sheets were dirty with mildew, and the side tables were absolutely filthy. The bed itself, however, was just as comfortable as three years ago, when a group of students had protected a child and allowed him to regain his health after a brutal beating from his father.
As Gavroche stirred beneath the blanket, Courfeyrac perked up and leapt to his feet, shaking Grantaire and Marius awake.
"Hey, get up. Gavroche is waking."
Mumbling under his breath as his oxygen-deprived brain tried to revive itself sufficiently for speech, Grantaire let out a gigantic yawn, inciting a grin from Courfeyrac and a reluctant small smile from Marius, who was still grieving over the loss of his best friend.
"About time…sheesh. That kid can sleep!"
"You're one to speak, mon ami."
"Mea culpa, mea culpa." Rubbing his eyes, Grantaire sluggishly got to his feet. "I need to use the bathroom."
"Bring up some hot tea while you're at it. It would do Gavroche good."
"Er…right."
Grantaire treaded out of the bedroom, with something other than hot tea on his mind.
Slowly opening his eyes, Gavroche carefully took in his surroundings. Staring up at the whitewashed ceiling and the familiar table on his sides, he looked back up at the ceiling and spoke to himself aloud, confused at the events of the day and how he had found himself back in the same room where he recuperated a long time ago.
"Were the last three years…a dream?"
Laughing at the innocence bubbling in Gavroche's comment, Courfeyrac walked up to the bed and sat on it. Marius remained in his seat, staring blankly out of the window, not speaking or giving any indication that he was aware that Gavroche was awake.
"You skinned your knees a little just now. We brought you up to the guesthouse. Joly popped by earlier to bandage you up."
Shaking off the fog in his head, Gavroche sat up in the bed and stared at the adjacent wall as he took in what Courfeyrac had just said. It hadn't been a dream after all. After quickly getting past the feeling of embarrassment at having cried himself to sleep in the middle of the street, the cold, hard truth hit him like a brick wall. As his eyes pricked for the second time that day, Gavroche stared up at Courfeyrac sorrowfully, dreading to hear the affirmative.
"Eponine…she died, didn't she?"
Courfeyrac didn't want to be the person who had to confirm the truth to the boy, to tell him that his sister was in fact dead, but he nodded solemnly and apologetically all the same.
"Yes…she died."
At Courfeyrac's words, Gavroche immediately looked down at the blanket, not wanting to let anybody see him cry again. As his throat closed up due to his rapid swallowing to cease his urge to cry, Gavroche choked back hot tears that gathered around his eyelids, replacing those that he had lost just hours ago. Watching's Gavroche's rapidly reddening cheeks and pained snivels, Courfeyrac placed his hands on both sides of the boy's face and forced it upwards. Affronted, Gavroche shook his head violently as he tried to look back down, but Courfeyrac's superior strength won.
Knowing that he had to treat the situation with utmost care, Courfeyrac spoke with a serene tone of voice, attempting to reason with the boy.
"Gavroche, listen to me. It's okay to cry."
As Gavroche's head shaking became more emphatic, Courfeyrac leaned in to the boy's face and spoke fiercely.
"You're not weak, Gavroche, you're not weak. Crying because of something like this doesn't beget weakness. Good grief, if my sister had died, I'd be blubbering like a baby, and I'm twice your age, for heaven's sake. It's okay to cry, do you understand me?"
Gavroche looked up in Courfeyrac's eyes, releasing a miserable sob as he screwed up his face, still resisting. Wrapping the boy in his arms, Courfeyrac squeezed his torso and whispered into his ear.
"Just let it all out, Gavroche. Let it all out."
Finally given permission to be vulnerable, Gavroche's inner barricades fell as he shed sorrowful tears for his sister. At the thought of how Eponine had practically single-handedly kept him alive for his entire childhood, the gravity of his situation finally dawned upon him. In a single afternoon he had lost his protector, his friend and his family. The tears couldn't stop flowing, and Gavroche let them, not noticing that he was soaking Courfeyrac's shoulder, and his friend mercifully decided to not pursue the matter if he had even noticed it in the first place.
Throughout it all, Marius didn't say a word.
As Gavroche's bawling slowly ceased, he was then reminded of something that Eponine had said to him just the day before, and a slight feeling of anger rose in his chest as he stared past Courfeyrac's shoulder at his other friend, who was still absent-mindedly staring out of the window, consumed by his own thoughts. Courfeyrac, feeling Gavroche stop shaking against him, slowly got off the boy.
"Are you feeling bett-"
"She loved you, you know."
Courfeyrac couldn't tell which he was more surprised by, Gavroche's sudden severe tone of voice or his accusation that some unnamed girl had loved him. It took a while for Courfeyrac to register Gavroche's gaze, which was resting on Marius, who had turned away from the window in partial shock at Gavroche's sharp tone. Recalling Eponine unrequited love for his fellow student, Courfeyrac then understood. Now feeling very out of place in the room as the other two occupants had a stare-off, Courfeyrac got off the bed.
"I'll leave you two alone for a while."
As soon as the door was shut, Gavroche hastily wiped off his tear tracks with his sleeve and sat upright on the bed, directing to Marius a look that could have quelled the bravest of revolutionaries. Realizing that Gavroche had probably been aware of Eponine's crush on him for a far longer time than he had himself, Marius buried his face in his hands and sighed.
"Well?"
Wincing a little at his little friend's fierce prompt, Marius sank into his chair, looking at Gavroche dejectedly.
"How…how long has she-"
"Five years at least."
Feeling more and more like a jerk by the second, Marius closed his eyes.
"I'm not going to defend myself, Gavroche. I honestly didn't notice."
"How is that possible?!" Leaping off the bed and striding angrily towards Marius, Gavroche growled a little as he glared straight at his friend. "Everyone else knew!"
Confused, Marius opened his eyes and stared at Gavroche.
"What do you mean 'everyone else knew'?"
"That's exactly what I meant, you idiot!"
Realizing that Gavroche was angry enough to insult him and forget completely about the formalities, which he had gotten so used to hearing from him over the past few years, Marius was completely taken aback when the boy drove his fist into his stomach in blind rage, knocking the wind out of him.
"Oof! Gavroche!"
Gavroche ignored Marius' shout, instead settling for an endless barrage of punches as he continued to try and inflict as much pain as possible on the man who had hurt his older sister so much, and for so long. The punches, weakened by Gavroche's small stature and exhaustion, did little to no damage, but alarmed Marius sufficiently to rise from his seat and grabbed onto Gavroche's clenched fists, holding him back as Gavroche gasped for breath, still trying to advance and put Marius' lights out.
"Gavroche, please listen to me."
"No!"
"Gavroche…"
"I can't believe I thought you were a nice guy!" Gavroche stepped back and dropped his fists to his sides, staring up tearfully at a remorseful Marius. "I can't believe I said it was okay for her to go after you! I can't believe…" Gavroche dashed forward and aimed a kick at Marius' shin. "That you're such a damn JERK!"
Yelling out in pain as Gavroche's kick hit its mark, Marius desperately racked his brain for a solution for containing the young boy long enough to properly converse with him. Bending down, Marius grabbed onto Gavroche's right ankle and, in one fell swoop, lifted him off the ground, a remarkably easy feat considering Gavroche's light weight and small size despite his age. Screaming and swearing to high heaven at being treated like a plaything, Gavroche desperately swung his fists outward whilst being suspended upside down, his jacket falling over his face, but to no avail.
"LET ME DOWN!"
"Listen to me, Gavroche!"
"ARGH!"
It took a while for Gavroche to realize that he was utterly helpless in his current position. Ceasing his struggling, Gavroche folded his arms crossly and looked away from Marius, utterly affronted. Breathing a sigh of relief, Marius tried to ignore how funny Gavroche looked upside down, and spoke.
"I've…never truly loved Eponine."
"You-"
"Please, Gavroche, listen to me first." Marius hastily silenced the boy, whose temper was already flared up. "Romantic love is a…very different thing from the love between friends and family. Romantic love…cannot be forced and…cannot be easily forgotten."
Ensuring that Gavroche was staying silent, Marius continued his attempt at explaining the concept of love as best as he could.
"I cannot claim to be an expert in the topic-"
"I'll say."
"But…" Marius pursed his lips at Gavroche's rude interruption. "I can assure you that I've only regarded Eponine as a friend. My best friend, in fact. I love her, but…I've just…never felt attracted to her in that way, you know? Trust me, if I had truly loved Eponine in the same way that I now know that she did, I would have said something to her."
Realizing once more that his best friend was now gone, Marius looked down at the ground in sorrow. Gavroche stared at the man, frowning.
"I'm sorry, Gavroche. And I'm even more sorry to Eponine. I can probably never make it up to her. I don't know how I've never noticed, and if I did I definitely wouldn't have dragged her to find Cosette with me!" Shaking his head at his blatant foolishness, Marius bit his lip as he felt his eyes sting. "Your sister was a saint, Gavroche. She was an absolute saint for keeping quiet about it for so long."
There was a moment of silence between the pair for a length of time, before Gavroche spoke up.
"Monsieur Marius?"
"Yes?" Marius smiled lightly; glad that Gavroche had least calmed down enough to not address him with an insult. Gavroche, however, looked positively dizzy.
"Could you let me down? I'm feeling a little weird. I think all my blood is rushing to my head…"
Realizing that he had held the boy in the air for the majority of ten minutes, Marius rushed to set Gavroche back onto steady ground, to which he responded by gripping onto the side of the bed to avoid tipping over at the sudden change in the orientation of his surroundings.
"Sorry about that, but I didn't know how else to keep you from getting angry…"
Swallowing a little, Gavroche sat firmly on the bed, waited for his head to stop spinning and drew in his legs closer to his body. Marius obviously had meant no harm. Even though Gavroche couldn't help but feel angry at the thought of the emotional mistreatment that Eponine had experienced with Marius, he couldn't help but feel a little sorry for the man standing in front of him.
He just didn't know.
Was that really his fault?
"Before the first battle at the barricades, I talked to Eponine."
Sitting back down onto his seat, Marius stared at Gavroche, surprised.
"She mentioned everything that had happened with you and that girl." Gavroche solemnly looked up at his friend. "She said that…as long as you're happy, she would be happy too. And that somebody…has to make a sacrifice for another's happiness."
Feeling himself choke up yet again at the recollection of the last conversation he had with his sister, Gavroche raised his sleeve to his face and wiped, struggling to steady his voice.
"She was just happy that…she got to do it for you, monsieur Marius."
The thought of Eponine's concern for him was far too much to bear. As tears rolled freely down Marius' face, the ones on Gavroche's own mirrored them. The two boys embraced, sobbing freely on each other's shoulders as they mourned their friend and sister. Gripping tightly onto Gavroche, Marius realized that he, Eponine's little brother, was possibly the closest he would ever get to Eponine herself ever again. With that thought in mind, he squeezed the boy even tighter, and his action was similarly reciprocated.
Finally separating, Gavroche, biting his lip, whispered in Marius' ear.
"This…girl that you were talking about…the one that Eponine said you loved…is she pretty?"
Surprised that Gavroche was actually asking about Cosette, Marius indulged his query with an honest answer.
"She's gorgeous."
Telling himself that Marius deserved to be happy, just as his sister had intended, Gavroche responded in the best possible way he could think of.
"I'll need to talk to her." Gavroche folded his arms and stared mockingly at Marius with a stern pout on his face. "On behalf of Eponine, I need to make sure that you're fancyin' after a worthy girl."
Laughing a little at the gamin's cheekiness, Marius affectionately ruffled the boy's hair. Apparently, he had been forgiven.
"I'll bring you to see her once we're finished with our work at the barricades."
Gavroche grinned.
Knocking cautiously on the bedroom door and receiving approval to enter, Courfeyrac and Grantaire entered the room, followed closely by Joly.
"Is everything okay in here?"
Smiling at Gavroche's beaming face, Marius turned to Courfeyrac and spoke.
"Everything's fine."
"Excellent. Now, I asked Grantaire to bring up some tea, but…" Courfeyrac then turned and glared at the drunk student, who grinned sheepishly back at him. "He brought up beer instead."
"Aw, lighten up, Courfeyrac. A little beer won't do anybody any harm. Don't you think so, Gavroche?"
"Oui, monsieur Grantaire! Though, I haven't tried any before, so I don't know if…"
Hearing his words, Joly crossed his arms and looked sternly between the two miscreants, who, upon noticing Joly's frown, tried to look away.
"There's no need to lie, you two. I know you gave Gavroche alcohol before." Joly pointed accusingly at Grantaire. "I could smell it in his breath during my checkup with him that night. And answering your statement, no, a little alcohol won't do anybody any harm."
As Courfeyrac and Grantaire took their seats, Joly strode to the bed to check on Gavroche's wounds. Gradually, the sound of light chatter filled the room, something that all present had dearly missed after the many days of preparing for battle against the French military. It was moments such as these, where friends could chat about anything they wished, where the true spirit of camaraderie and solidarity rang clear, in contrast to the barricades where everyone feared for their lives.
"Enjolras wanted to come and see you, Gavroche, but he's busy working with the guys downstairs."
Hearing Joly's words, Gavroche nodded.
"Come to think of it, with the exception of Enjolras…isn't everybody from three years ago in this room right now?"
As everyone gave nods and mumbles of affirmation at Marius' revelation, Grantaire picked up a beer bottle and poured it into the mugs that he had previously brought up to the room.
"Alright everyone…I propose a toast-"
"Of course you would."
"To our friendship," Grantaire glared at Courfeyrac for the interruption. "And to success in the days ahead."
As the mugs were passed around, Gavroche gripped onto his tightly and looked at the golden liquid inside. It seemed like so long ago that he had tried it for the first time.
"Grantaire, you poured out an extra cup."
"Oh, that's for Enjolras. I'll just…drink that one for him too, if you know what I mean."
As everyone else in the room rolled their eyes, Grantaire cleared his throat and spoke, pausing at every sentence to allow everyone else in the room to echo his words.
"Drink with me, everyone. To the days gone by. To the future that stands before us. To the hopes and dreams of man. May the heavens protect us all. May the wine of friendship never run dry."
As Gavroche drank from his cup, he thought about his sister and how much he would miss her. He thought about his friends, who sat before him, drinking with him. He thought about the future, a future where his friends on the street would never die of hunger and disease again.
That future lay right before him.
It seemed that all he had to do was grab it.
Author's Note – I couldn't resist bringing the characters back into Gavroche's home-for-a-month that I used as the setting the first ten chapters. The Marius + Gavroche thing was challenging to write, but hopefully Gavroche's forgiveness doesn't seem to abrupt for everybody. Since I went for something like this, there wasn't a "Drink With Me" moment on the streets, so I decided to hold one in the room. I swapped most of the lyrics for something a little less depressing, to fit the atmosphere in the room.
The story will end sooner than 20 chapters (which I previously stated, if I remember correctly). Thank you all for sticking with me thus far.
Reviews appreciated.