A/N: Woo, hey there guys. Chapter 6 is here...AND its fairly longer than usual. I hope thats okay...lol. Anyway I did not want to spilt anything up in it so i kept it in one, and edited a bit here and there. I hope it doesn't seem to choppy and jumbled to you. If it does let me know so I can try to fix it. Anyway I hope you enjoy and thank you to all who read and review...and well I suppose thanks to all who read but didn't review as well...lol.

Luv Ya, Sash

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Disclaimer: I own nothing JK related

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Please Read and Review!

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Back in His Bed

Chapter 6: New Life

Married.

I'm married.

I'm a wife!

Oh Merlin.

Friday morning found Lily sitting on her couch with her head leaned back and her eyes shut. She had gotten married twelve hours ago to the most obstinate man in the known realm and it was too late now to think about whether she had made the right decision in doing so.

She had to believe she did, for the baby's sake.

When James had left her flat yesterday evening to get the special licence she'd hardly been able to sit down without getting back up again to move about her flat, pacing. Panic had begun to set in then, her wild mane of hair dancing all over, when she'd realised she didn't have anything remotely like a wedding dress. The only thing in her closet that had any chance of working was her white trouser set.

Lily sighed now and pressed a hand to her forehead. And that was what she had gotten married in. She'd fixed her hair, taken care of the worried signs that had lined her face, changed into her wedding ensemble and was waiting quietly, if not calmly, when James had returned to her flat with his errand predictably taken off with no problem.

She'd always dreamed that one day she would get married in a garden surrounded by people who meant a great deal to her, while wearing a light, floating white dress. And in recent months that dream had included James as her groom.

Instead she'd gotten a ceremony with a priest and two witnesses of whom she had met five minutes previously.

Her wedding kiss had been another thing that was nothing like she had dreamed about. They'd pecked each other coolly on the lips before pasting on a fake smile to take a photo at the wedding photo booth.

Last night, her wedding day slash night had only included one in five of what she'd wished for. Before now, during the past month she'd often wondered though if she would ever have her dream with him … for she knew now that it had been too much to hope for. A dream is a dream after all. Some achieve theirs and others remain a fantasy.

When the makeshift ceremony was over it had been late and they'd then decided—more like tried to avoid the downpour of rain that had seemed to knowingly mock their sad excuse for a wedding night—to spend the night in Harrow; in separate rooms of course.

She'd found it impossibly hard to fall asleep, knowing that they were now husband and wife; knowing that only a wall separated them and knowing that he might never be able to love her. She had probably only just drifted off when came time for her to awake. They'd had breakfast and he'd seen her home but she had still yet to feel at ease.

Before seeing her off however, James had announced that he would come to see her at her flat this evening to discuss what they'll do now. They had things to decide, preparations to make.

It was then an unnerving thing occurred to her, was she supposed to make him dinner?

Was she supposed to make him dinner when they move in together?

Lily passed her hand through her now-tamed hair in frustration, she was overreacting. There was nothing wrong in cooking a bit extra when she was planning on making herself something.

I guess that's what we really have to talk about tonight, Lily thought, just how we're going to live around each other.

She sighed again her mind going back to when James had left her.

At least after he left to prepare the special license she had had the presence of mind to send an owl to Rourke telling him she needed the day off today. She knew, even then that there was no way she'd be sane enough to go to work today. Merlin, she'd hardly been able to go past her living room this morning upon entering it.

Oh lord, she still had to tell Rourke and Alana what she'd gone and done. And not only them.

Aw crap! She thought her eyes flying open and she sat up.

Rourke and Alana was the least of her worries. What about Ferreira and Hannah? Oh god telling Hannah was going to be the worst.

Maybe she should have allowed Ferreira to tell the other girl about the baby. That way it would have been easier to ease into the fact that she's already married. They'd probably strangle her for not including them in the wedding.

Oh boy, I'm going to get crucified. She thought, her head falling into her hands and had the sudden urge to go get plastered.

But, since obviously it is nothing something she could do, chocolate seemed like it was the next best thing or sugar...maybe she should bake a cake.

She blew out a breath; it was going to be a long siege.

"Hey," James said quietly when she opened her door to him that evening.

"Hi," she answered, "come in." she indicated, closing the door and they both headed into the living room. After her chocolate fix she'd gone down to talk to the building manager. There had been a list of things that had needed doing so telling the manager that her flat was going to be vacated soon seemed like the best thing to start with.

They hadn't discussed when she would move in but it occurred to her that logically this weekend seemed like the most opportune time but as she didn't want to seem forward she decided not to say anything but still wanted to pack the items she least needed. That is, those in her bedroom, bathroom and kitchen.

And so by the time he arrived that evening she'd already made lasagne for dinner as having finished the legal aspects to her moving earlier.

While accomplishing what she had intended to do that day a few things occurred to her.

"I take it you didn't take the liberty to tell your friends about our," Lily cleared her throat, "situation?"

"No I haven't yet."

"I see," Lily said though she didn't really. Wouldn't they be the ones he told first? "Well as you know only Ferreira knows that I'm pregnant." She said. Before she had realised that the marauders probably didn't know she was "with child", she had walked around half expecting them to pop up out of nowhere and touch her belly.

"I made dinner, we can talk while we have some," Lily said moving to the kitchen. As they took out their food, Lily got drinks and they settled back comfortably into the living room.

James hadn't eaten dinner when he'd left work. He assumed they would talk and he would go home after. It came as a faint surprise to him that she'd prepared something for them.

Then again, in the six months they had been going out he's never once allowed her to cook for him and vice versa. As he took a bite, he chewed appreciatively.

"This is good," he said and hated how formally it came out.

"Thank you," came her equally stilted reply.

Silence echoed, effectively causing James to reflect on what he wanted from his marriage. They hadn't had the time to form other relationships, though from his mother's soiree it seemed really obvious to him that Lily and Lombard-the-bastard were close.

Wondering how close annoyed him.

Not that he cared who she had feelings for but damn it, it concerned him how those feelings would affect their baby's life.

He remembered clearly, the anger that had nagged at him throughout the entire evening until finally, when he couldn't take it any longer, he took the opportunity that had presented itself and followed her onto the terrace.

That kiss had electrified him, made him swell with emotion and need. His thoughts had filled of wanted her, taking her right then and there but he did not as rationality came back to him.

And then later that night when Fiona had failed to evoke the same passion in him as Lily had, he'd left the room, leaving her half naked and in shock.

He almost made a derisive noise at the memory. It might have come as a blow to her that a man hadn't wanted to sleep with her but for his peace of mind at the time he hadn't desired to, not even with the unwanted image of the man and Lily consorting torridly in his mind.

Damn his imagination anyway.

Common sense made him understand that she couldn't possibly love the man in the mere two weeks they had broken up, nor would she engage in intimacy so fast in a relationship but his unwavering jealousy was so strong he couldn't help but think that maybe she would make an exception this time, after all she was not a virgin any longer.

The thought that she may love another man while she was pregnant with his child made his blood boil. It angered him that for however long their marriage lasts she would be wishing for it to be over.

James knew he accused her of manipulation to get a ring on his finger but damn it what else was he supposed to think at that time. What got to him the most was that rationally he knew that she wouldn't pull something as immoral as that.

There was another thing he knew too. It was something that he should have realised earlier if he had wanted to keep it.

He hadn't wanted to, he hadn't wanted it, he still didn't want it but maybe in the back of his mind he always knew the truth, it was just that he had never before accepted it.

A man never notices something before it's gone and looking Lily now, he knew that it was most certain that he no long held her love and he was quite positive that he didn't want it back.

"It'll be good to tell the others after we move you in." he said trying to get back to what he wanted to say.

"I think so too." She said nodding. "Hannah will be back on Saturday, so that's convenient for us to tell them on Sunday."

James nodded and she continued "Our marriage is between us," she started then paused, "I think it would be best if the impression we give is an encouraging one. I don't or won't rather, allow people to think that we're handling this all wrong. What we do is our business and I think if they get the impression that we're working things out then that's better all around."

"I see," James said, he was thinking along those lines as well. "I agree with that."

"Good,"

"I think we should wait until next weekend to go see my parents," James said sounding a bit uneasy. "I plan to owl them soon to tell them we're married but I think its better we wait a few days for them to digest this."

Lily nodded feeling oddly relieved. She knew she shouldn't, after all Angie and Richard were accepting of her and everything else.

"If we start tomorrow, I think we can move your things into my flat by Sunday." He continued trying to sound more positive, not that he felt that way.

Lily nodded. "I have some of them packed already and all my legal stuff has been dealt with."

James felt pleasure and relief at that. Most people didn't bother planning ahead but he knew Lily well enough to know that she's probably made a list to start on as soon as he had left her this morning.

He almost smiled imagining her writing her points down on her little note pad until his thoughts strayed once more. Did she have a list on how to go about loving a man other than her husband?

"Then, if you have them in boxes, I'll carry them over when I leave."

"Okay, yes, that's fine," she said giving a small smile. "They're in the hallway next to the kitchen.

"There is one more thing," he said knowing he shouldn't bring it up yet not being able to get the image of Lombard out of his mind. "I am not going to allow my wife to make a mockery of me; we are keeping up appearances to show the world we are like any normal married couple right? I expect you to hold your own marriage vows sacred."

"What are you talking about?" Asked Lily, confused.

"I'm speaking of Lombard, do you still intend on seeing him through out our marriage?" he asked and she seemed surprised for she was gapping at him.

"Rourke has nothing to do with this." She said disbelief tingeing her voice. "You have nothing to worry about where he is concerned, he doesn't matter."

"Of course he matters Lily, one can hardly go about knowing his wife is having an affair, never mind that they're open to the fact that their is no love in the marriage."

"I am not having an affair!" Lily exclaimed. She was hurt but some how she was unable to voice that Rourke was her cousin's husband "I thought we sorted through this already. Rourke was just there to help me through the evening. He works with me and came as a friend James, nothing more."

"I have to admit I find that hard to believe. How is it that since he is so close a friend to you that I haven't met him before?" He said and Lily couldn't believe his nerve or his brain. Hadn't she already mentioned that Rourke was family?

"You have never showed much interest in meeting my friends or my family," Lily threw at him instead of telling the truth. "And you are not one to speak to me about appearances. For a man who goes from woman to woman because he is bored doesn't tell the world much, other than he's a renowned playboy. That you so quickly turned to another woman after we finished—" She said then stopped and breathed in deeply. She had not meant to go that far. She hadn't wanted him to know how much that had hurt her but the blank expression on his face gave nothing away to what he was thinking.

"I'm not going to pretend that that didn't hurt, it did but I am not like you. I don't go around shagging every willing body and for you to even think I would shows me how little you knew me, if you knew me at all." The last few words shuddered out and she fought to keep her cool. "Trust works both ways and I may have done my fair share of deceiving but James so have you, therefore I would suggest that you don't be a hypocrite."

"I have every intention of honouring my vows Lily," he said his voice low and steady but she could tell he was controlling his anger. "All I am saying is that you honour yours as well."

"I would think that mine wasn't the one in question James."

He gave her a dark scowl but said nothing. "I think I should leave now."

"That is the best idea you've had so far." She said and he turned and headed for the boxes she had pointed too earlier.

"I'll come back around eight," he said then as an after thought added, "Thanks for dinner."

"No problem."

Lily felt disheartened, the lack of trust James had for her was obvious but he seemed completely annoyed that she had indicated that she didn't have any trust in him. The only thing was, she did trust him.

Lily watched as he stacked two of her boxes near the door…time will only tell how our lives were going to be, she guessed as she went into her bedroom to pack her clothes.

He said nothing when he left, all she heard was the snick of the door.

And so their marriage has begun.

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Lily studied the people gathered around James's flat. Ferreira was the only one who knew about the baby and from the look on her face Lily guessed that she probably figured out that this has something to do about her and James as a couple as well.

Last night was her first night in this flat since they'd stopped sleeping together. The spare room was of course smaller than the master bedroom but it suited her needs. James had offered her his but she couldn't bare to see, much less sleep in, a bed that had only so recently held his mistress, though it was not only that that had her saying no.

All those times, those mornings that had always seemed brighter when she woke from his bed, in his arms, will not longer happen. It had been a place of magic and peace but now it had been replaced. Probably with an even bigger bed than his king-sized one so that he could hold orgies every night, she thought disgustedly and unfairly.

She knew that if James had changed everything in his apartment that had reminded him of her then ridding himself of the bed would be the first thing he'd do.

"I take it this gathering is to announce that the two of you are back together again." Sirius said dryly before waving his hand in a bored fashion. "No need, we've known the two of you would eventually work things out."

Lily said nothing, what could she say. They were only technically back together but it did her heart good to know that the others were hoping that James loved her enough, never mind that there wasn't any love to be had.

"No you didn't," Peter said looking at him oddly.

"Of course I did, you probably had misunderstood me," Sirius said to him.

"No I didn't. You plainly said 'James is an addled fool, the idiot wouldn't go back to Lily, never mind that she is the best thing that's ever happened to him.'"

"Err…" Sirius muttered sneaking a glance at James's annoyed face as Lily felt her breath hitch in her chest. She'd had no idea Sirius considered her so. She felt an strange urge to hug him and more than that she felt a urge to cry.

"Never mind all that," Hannah said waving her arm in a shooing motion. "I know that the two of you have been having problems and that you separated for some reason a few weeks ago—three was it? Whatever, my point is that one or both of you are hiding something from the rest of us and I want to know what.

As Sirius mentioned, this is an odd place for us all to meet. We've never assembled here as a group before, though I for one have never even been in the building before now. You have something more important to tell us than that you're getting back together, so lets hear it."

James reached down and took hold of her hand, startling Lily who was giving Hannah sheepish expression.

"We do have an announcement to make," he said and smiled leaving Lily stunned as to how he looked, pretending to be happy. His expression made her heart leap in her chest. God, she loved him.

"We're married," he said and his announcement was met with silence. After a couple minutes he cleared his throat before speaking again. "And, uh, we're also pregnant."

It took a few moments before at least one person reacted.

"Congratulations," Remus said grinning coming forward to hug her before shaking James's hand.

Ferreira too, then jumped up from her seat to pull Lily into a hug. "Oh you got married," I'm so happy for you." She said then pulled back. "Of course I'm a bit vexed that I wasn't a bridesmaid but that's alright, you'll just have to owe me something."

Peter followed with a "congratulations" of his own and then Sirius got up and poked them both in the arm.

"Ow," they both muttered together rubbing the poked place.

"What was that for?" James asked.

"For not telling us everything before stupid," Sirius answered. "But I'm happy for you anyway. It's about time you opened your eyes again."

James gave him an odd look before he stepped away to make room for Hannah.

"Oh my goodness," Lily exclaimed upon seeing her. "Why are you crying?" this was not the reaction she expected. Indeed she far more expected anger than tears.

"Because I'm so happy for you," she said wailing and went to hug Lily, who felt her own eyes begin to prick with tears. Soon they were both crying and had male part of the gathering looking at them warily.

"It's the hormones," was all Ferreira said and she smiled at their uncomfortable faces.

When the crying was over, Remus suggested they do something to celebrate. It was Sirius who suggested they all go out to dinner and get drunk afterwards, except for the mum to be of course.

The night was festive and happy and Lily enjoyed herself… if only her life wasn't such a sham.

…

It was about five thirty when Lily got home that evening. It had been a tiring week because despite their friends' easy acceptance of their relationship and their baby Lily felt a trifle uneasy.

So between that, telling Rourke and Alana that they were married and trying not to ogle James daily she was beat.

Rourke and Alana wanted to invite them out to a celebratory dinner on Friday and that was two days away. Merlin, she had told James she would handle telling Alana and her husband about them, taking the coward's way out in letting James see Rourke again.

Her and her stupid, bad choices. Somehow she got the feeling that it was all going to blow up in her face really badly. Merlin how ironic was that?

So she hadn't told them James still didn't know that Rourke was her cousin's husband, it wouldn't be that bad would it?

Yes it would.

James hadn't ever mentioned Rourke since Friday and she didn't think he ever would again but since she couldn't have told him then that Rourke was just family she doubted she could now.

Lily flopped down on the extremely soft couch, kicked off her shoes and curled her feet under her with a heartfelt sigh. She was tired; her feet hurt for no apparent reason and she hadn't eaten, nor felt like eating, all day, or rather all week. She had forced down a fruit salad at lunch but she knew that still wasn't enough.

She racked her brain for something healthy to ingest.

Milk, that's what she needed. It wouldn't be that bad to force down some milk now would it?

Making herself get up from the couch she made her way to the kitchen and poured out a glass. She was halfway through the glass when the knocker sounded, and putting it down on the cupboard counter she went to the door and checked the peephole.

She stifled a gasp when she recognised the woman there.

Lily knew they should have gone to see them; she knew she shouldn't have listened to James, never mind the fact that at the time, she had been agreeable to it. Though seeing the woman on the other side of the door filled her with such elation and relief she was sagging with it.

Opening the door she practically fell into the woman's arms as they hugged each other tightly.

Angela had come to see them.