Present day
"Dimitri... Dimitri come on...wake up... Please..."
I could hear the voice echoing in the blackness... It was the voice that had always made my heart beat faster, It was the sweetest voice in my world... Its been so long since Ive heard her voice...
"Dimitri... Please...Just wake up..."
She sounded so... Scared... And so sad...
Wait... Im sleeping?... I tried to remember what happened... How I got here... Strigoi?...
Thats it, I remember fighting... Being thrown against a solid wall, the sickening, painful thud of my head hitting the wall... Crumbling to the floor and being unable to move...and... And watching her fight alone...
Wait! If shes talking to me... Then shes alive! She must have made it!
I struggled through the darkness, I had no idea how to get out, no idea which way was up, which way was down, all I knew was that I needed to get to her, to see her face, to hold her again and apologise for being that stupid fool and leaving her, for making her think I didnt love her... But I do! I love her so much! I never went a day without thinking about her... I need her to know!
I struggled in the darkness, pushing my way forward, I could make out the blur of light ahead of me...
Then suddenly my eyes flickered open, the light bursting painfully against my eyes. It was blinding after the darkness Id been engulfed in for so long.
I clenched them closed again, trying to stifle the burning feeling the light caused.
I heard the sharp intake of breath followed by the soft "Dimitri..." that she whispered.
My eyes shot open, ignoring the painfully bright light as my vision cleared and I was finally able to make out the soft silhouette of my beautiful Roza, her long wavy hair framing her face and falling down her front as she leaned foreward towards me from her seat next to the bed I was in. Her face was beaten and bruised, a deep gash on her forehead, but I swear she has never looked more beautiful than she did right now.
I slowly, carefully lifted one hand and brushed my fingers down her cheek softly, she closed her eyes and leaned into my touch.
"I thought you were dead." she barely whispered, I watched as a tear escaped from her closed eye and trailed its way down her cheek. There have only ever been a couple of times in my life where I have known this strong, amazing women to cry and I hated it every time... A women like her should never be put through anything that caused her pain... And yet every time Ive witnessed it, it has been because of me...
"Oh Roza..." my voice was hoarse and dry, my throat ached like I hadnt had water in months. She looked up at me, wiping away the moisture from her eyes before reaching out and handing me a glass of water from the table beside the bed.
I pulled myself up into a sitting position, my muscles aching like nothing Ive felt before, every muscle and tendon in my body felt bruised. I gulped back the water, feeling the water flow down my throat and into my stomach it was that dry.
"Better?" she asked, taking the now empty glass from me and setting it back down.
"yes... Thankyou Roza." I smiled weakly at her, my eyes wandering over her face, refreshing every single little detail that has already been etched in my mind since the day I fell in love with her.
"what happened?" I asked, running my hand through my lose hair.
"you were knocked unconcious... I... Eddie killed the strigoi that had me pinned, then the rest of them disappeared. All of the moroi they took were all right, we got them all out."
She had a hesitant look on her face, her eyes looking everywhere except at me. I dont blame her, she probably still hates me for what I said and for leaving her the way I did.
"well... Im glad you're awake again... Ill go and let Tasha know. I bet shes dying to see you..." she almost growled her name like it was a dirty word as she stood up and took a few steps away. It hurt more than it should have for me to watch her walking away from me, I wanted to make her stay, to keep her by my side forever...
"Roza... Wait." I spoke before I had even figured out what I was going to say. She stopped at the door, her hand pressed against the metal as she turned her head to look at me. Her face looked so torn, like she was fighting herself not to turn around and come back... Oh how I wish she would... "How... How long have I been... Unconcious?"
Her face dropped slightly, like it wasnt what she wanted to hear... What did she want to hear? I wonder if... No she couldnt want me back after what I did...
"three days." she answered bluntly, turning back to the door as she added, "Goodbye Dimitri."
"Roza... Im...Im sorry..." I didnt know what else to say, I didnt want her to leave without knowing how truely sorry I am.
Her body tensed and when she turned back to look at me she looked angry, "Sorry? Sorry for what exactly Dimitri?!" she asked, her voice raising slightly.
I flinched at her tone, I had expected her to be angry... only I hadnt really expected it.
"Dimka!? Hes awake?!" I heard a shrill voice practically scream from down the hallway, Rose definitely heard it to because her whole body tensed even more and she sucked in a breath. Without even looking back at me she pushed her way out of the door and was gone.
I barely had time to register that she left as Tasha bowled through the doors, flinging them open wide and rushing towards me. She threw her arms around my neck, making a loud groan escape my lips as she bashed into my aching muscles.
"ohh sorry Dimka." She gushed, letting me go slightly. "are you ok? you're not seriously hurt are you? I thought you were going to die on me!" She was speaking but I was barely paying attention, my eyes trained on the door wishing that my Roza would come waltzing back in with that beautiful sarcastic grin she would wear and pass some witty remark about it taking so long for me to wake up.
"...Dimka?" I realised Tasha was looking at me with a confused but expectant expression, I figured she must have asked me something.
"Sorry, what?" I asked turning my attention back to her.
"I asked if you knew when you would be fit to leave? We were supposed to go home tomorrow." She spoke, an oddly happy smile on her face.
"uhh I dont know... I just woke up, Im not even sure whats wrong with me yet." I replied, playing with the bed sheet without actually looking at Tasha. I wondered if she could tell my hesitance the way Roza would have...
"oh, well Ill go ask"
Nope, she doesnt get me like Rose does... I sighed again as Tasha walked out of the room.
We came back to court four days ago to visit Christian and Lissa, we havent been back here since leaving two long years ago.
The day we arrived there was an attack just outside the gates, they had taken a group of royals who had been coming back from town. I was sent to rescue them with Rose and a group of other guardians, it was there that we were basically overpowered in the caves a few miles from court.
I guess it had been a shock for Rose, she didnt even realise I was here untill I had jumped into the van that she was driving. She'd just sat there, mouth open and staring at me like she was seeing a ghost, I swear her face paled slightly, I couldnt find any words to say to her, just seeing her face again after so long left me speechless.
She had composed herself, still saying nothing to me as she turned back and Started driving the van...
I must have been dozing off thinking about it, since the next thing I knew Tasha was back in the room talking loudly to me, without realising I had been sleeping.
"Dimka, good news, you dont have any real injuries, you're just on light duties for a week, And Ive extended our stay untill after you're all better to fly." She babbled away.
I was glad to hear that I wouldnt be stuck in here much longer, and the fact that we were going to be here for a while longer sent my heart racing. This could be my chance to make things right with Rose, I hated thinking that she hated me...
I needed to get out of this room, Tasha was practically suffocating me. Since leaving the hospital this afternoon she has been constantly by my side, not giving me a single moments peace and its driving me insane.
"Im going to go for a walk, Ill be back in a bit." I said making my way to the door.
"ok, let me get my coat..."
"No, no its ok, you stay here I wont be long." I said, opening the door and walking swiftly out.
I made my way as quickly as my still rather sore body would carry me down the stairs and out of the building into the cool night air.
I walked around court, I know it sounds rather pathetic but every single place I went reminded me of her. I admit, 100% that since leaving I have turned into a lovesick sorry excuse for a man. I should have fought for her, I should have argued with Tasha, I should have done more...
Id been so lost in my internal torment that I wasnt watching where I was walking, so I crashed right into the person in front of me.
"sorry..." I mumbled still not looking up as I walked around the person and started to carry on.
"Is that it?" A soft voice asked,
I froze, how was I so blind... I whipped around faster than my sore muscles liked.
"Im sorry Rose... I didnt realise it was you" I breathed out, taking in all of her. She was dressed in the most beautiful strapless deep purple dress, it stopped just above her knees, and gathered underneath her bust.
I dont know what my expression was but it made her blush a soft pink. "Where are you off to?" She asked, eyeing me warily.
"...no where in particular..." I answered tearing my eyes away from her.
"Well... Im glad to see you're up and about already..." She said quietly.
"thanks... Where are you all dressed up to go?" I asked, unable to hide the curiousity in my voice.
I was honestly surprised that we were having such a civilised conversation...
"Lissas holding a dinner... Would you like to come... or do you need to be back with your charge?" She asked, her nose scrunching up slightly at the word charge. I pulled out my phone, sending a quick text to Tasha to let her know I wouldnt be back for dinner.
"I'd love to come Rose... Are you sure Princess Dragomir will be fine with it?" I asked taking a couple of steps closer to her.
"Yes Lissa will be fine with it, im sure... Christian on the other hand..." She said smiling slightly at me.
I couldnt believe how much I had missed that smile, the photos I have of her just dont do any justice to the real thing, not at all. I knew what she meant when she said he wouldnt be happy... he knew I hurt Rose but I was surprised, I would have thought for sure Lissa would be the one to hate me for what I did...
"come on then." she said turning and walking the way I had come, her heels clicking on the concrete. We walked along in silence, it was a comfortable silence though which was just as good as conversation to me. It had always been like this with us... before... we didnt need words, we could convey what we needed to with just a look... god I wished it was still like that...
We reached the door to Lissas, Rose didnt bother knocking she just waltzed on in so I followed behind her.
"Liss Im here. And Ive bought one extra, I hope you dont mind." She said loud enough for Lissa to hear from the kitchen.
"Sure thing Rose... Who is-" Lissa started asking, until she walked out and caught sight of me.
She looked to Rose, studying her face... I noticed Rose nod just once but I still caught it. Lissa must have been asking her something through the bond.
"Hello Princess." I bowed slightly to her, I knew she hated it but I felt the need to be formally polite since I was now technically a guest in their house.
"Dimitri." She nodded before adding, "Its Lissa, you should know that." She sent me a genuine looking smile so I return to it, nodding as I did.
"Dimitri? Is Aunt Tasha here?" Christian asked walking into the room beside Lissa.
"No, Shes in moroi housing at the moment." I answered truthfully.
Just as I finished answering there was a knock at the door, We all moved off to the living room except for Lissa who went to open the door. I presumed that it would be one of their other friends until I heard the voice.
"Oh Lissa, I hope you dont mind, I thought I would bring over a bottle of bubbly and some cake." Tasha spoke cheerfully.
I heard Rose groan from her position on the couch, I couldnt help but glance at her and chuckle at the annoyed look on her face.
As soon as our eyes met I could tell that she wanted to say so much more, but she was holding her tongue because they had both just entered the room. Tasha looking as though she was surprised to see us all in there, but Rose and I both knew that she s faking it since I had texted her and told her where I was and why.
Rose snorted when she saw me roll my eyes, causing her to get odd looks from everyone.
She just shrugged her shoulders, "Im hungry, is food done yet?" She asked looking to Christian.
"If I said no you'd probably hit me... So yes... food is done." Christian said sarcastically, a huge smirk on his face.
Rose was the first to rise and literally race into the dining room, I waited where I was, not wanting to rush and upset my muscles, god I felt like such an old man right now.
When I did eventually get there I paused for a moment, taking in the seating arrangement. Christian and Lissa were at one side of the table, Tasha was at the end, then an empty seat and then Rose... Looks like I get to sit beside Rose... I tried to hide the smile that threatened to creep onto my face as I took my seat, sliding in gracefully beside her.
As soon as I was seated, I rested both my hands on the table...where Tasha immediately did the same, only she rested her hand on top of one of mine.
I looked at her, where she was trying to, I guess, smile seductively at me, then down to our hands, before moving my hand out from under hers to pick up the glass of wine in front of me, taking a long sip of it.
Thats how most of the dinner went, I would place my hand on the table and she would try and hold it, or she would try to rest it on my knee or my thigh under the table, not being very subtle about it either.
I tried to hold conversations with Rose, asking her questions but I swear, everytime she started to answer Tasha would talk over her about something else. Towards the end I could tell Rose was getting fed up with her.
"So Roza, what's Eddie doing these days?" I asked, running out of general things to talk about.
"Oh he's work-"
"Oh my gosh Christian this wine is amazing, what is this one called? Its soooo much better than the one I bought." Tasha spoke loudly across the table.
Rose slammed her fork down on the table, clattering it against her plate, everyones eyes whipped up at her and there was silence. She stood up, slapping her palms against the table as she glared at Tasha.
"Thats it, Im sick of you. Thanks for dinner Liss, but if I hang around this tramp any longer I swear I will punch her face. Come on Dimitri, lets go and catch up outside." She said turning to look at me and then walked out of the room .
I paused where I was for a moment, slightly shocked at the sudden outburst, but collected myself. "Thankyou both for the amazing meal, it was delicious." I said rising up from the table.
"Dimka? You're not seriously going out there with her are you? Wouldnt you find it better company to stay in here with us?" Tasha asked.
"No its ok, I want to catch up with Rose, Its been two years since Ive last spoken to her after all." I replied, trying to act as non challant as I could, in my mind I was excited to be able to spend some time with Rose, catching up and hopefully apologising properly. I couldnt understand how she was acting so... nice... to me after the way we left things...
I walked out of the sliding door and onto the deck that was off the living room. The sun was slowly coming up over the horizon, casting a pinky orange glow over the still slightly black night sky. Rose was sitting at the edge of the deck, her legs dangling over the side, sipping on the glass of wine I hadnt even realised she had bought out with her.
"How the hell have you put up with that?" She asked sarcastically, not even turning to see that it was me.
"Shes really not that bad... usually." I answered, moving over to sit beside her, dangling my longer legs off as well, its a good thing this deck was higher than normal ones.
Rose just snorted in response, she never did like Tasha, it didnt help at all when I was made her guardian...
"So how have you really been Roza?" I sucked it up and asked.
She shrugged her shoulders looking away from me, "How do you think Ive been Dimitri? Ive just been going through ever day, being Lissas guardian, putting my life on the line for my charge...just like you." I could hear a hint of sarcasm as well as sadness in her voice, I could tell she was holding something back, she wanted to say something more but wouldnt.
"What is it?" I asked, turning my body slightly so that I was facing her more.
She skulled back what was left in her wine glass, putting it back on the deck and turning to face me, so that our knees were only barely touching, but that same familiar spark from before was there, the same one that would tingle through me everytime we touched
"Everyday for the last two years, all Ive done is thought about what you said... about not protecting your charge because of me... Dimitri I spent so long blaming you for leaving me, angry that you couldnt trust my strength and my skill, I believed that you didnt think I was good enough to protect myself or to be able to keep myself alive, And being angry at the fact that you chose her over me, but I get it now. I understand why you felt you had to go... and its ok. You thought it was the right thing to do... Its our duty, its all we were born to do." She said, her eyes slightly shining with tears.
"Roza... You have no idea how much I hate what I did, how much I Wish I could go back... I never would have left. Ive spent every day thinking about you, wishing that I was still here with you. I should have fought for you, I should have atleast tried, I never should have put her before you..." I couldnt help the waver in my voice at the end, the emotions that were welling up inside me as I finally spoke the words to her that I have been wanting to say for so long now.
I watched the tear slip from her eye, my hand moving of its own accord to her cheek, my thumb caught the tear and wiped it away.
"Im so sorry Roza." I whispered. "I wish we could go back."
She closed her eyes, shaking her head lightly side to side untill her hand moved up and held my own to her cheek, I hadnt even realised that mine still lingered there.
"Dimitri... I-"
Footsteps came stamping out from the living room cutting off what she was about to say, We both looked up to see Tasha marching out to us, a murderous scowl on her face.