Disclaimers: Don't own any part of Gundam Wing nor it's characters. It's a loan.

Warnings: Shounen-ai, OOCs, AU (what else do I write?)

Circle of Destiny

Part 17

Quatre ran through the twisting corridors, blinded by tears and grief. He panted, each breath a broken hearted sob as he sought to escape the pain that assailed him. He couldn't, didn't want to believe this. Trowa had practically promised eternity but now… now…

He covered his mouth with a hand to stop the sobs from coming and fled into the servant's quarters, into his room.

Duo whirled around as his brother slammed into their room. He eyes widened as he took in the sorrow and pain etched all over his brother's expression.

"Quatre?" He enquired, rushing toward his brother and gathering the sobbing elf in his arms. "What happened?"

"He… he…" Quatre stammered, the hiccupping sobs interfering with his speech. "He told me to leave…" The last came out as an anguish wail.

"Who?" Duo growled, but he knew who could cause his brother this much pain. There was only one person and he was the last person he wanted Quatre to be with. So, shouldn't he be happy? With that fiasco of a relationship over, he could leave and take his people back home. He had the means to retrieve the myst and he could fulfil the mission he set out to do so many years ago.

So why did he feel like his life was coming to end?

"Trowa… he said… he said…"

Duo didn't have to hear what Trowa said, all he knew was that Man broke his little brother's heart and he felt distinctively murderous. It took him nearly an hour for Quatre to calm down as the crying ebbed to exhausted sniffling and finally sleep. He tucked his brother safely into the cot and strode out of the room, an air of rage following him.

He was stopped barely three feet outside his door.

"Your Emminence," Wufei said, respectfully inclining his head. "Where are you going?" He asked placidly, his arms crossed in front of him. He was a picture of nonchalance but Duo knew better.

"Stay out of my way, Luinatar," Duo hissed in elven tongue. "I have a score to settle. No one hurts my little brother like that and gets away without at least missing an ear, or a head." An arm blocking his path stopped Duo's progress. He swung shocked eyes at the warrior.

"Stop it, Nefros," Wufei warned softly.

"You… you're helping that Man?" Duo uttered disbelievingly.

Wufei crossed his arms back in front of him and sighed heavily. "No, I am helping us all. Duo," he switched back to human tongue. "I told him to end it with Quatre."

A flash of rage shot through Duo's brain and before he had a chance to consider anything, Wufei was lying on the ground, nose trickling with blood. Duo stood over him, his chest heaving, his fist sore. "Why?" He grated out.

Wufei sat up, rubbing his bruise jaw gingerly. "Why? Ask yourself. Would you have left if Quatre stayed with Trowa?"

"Of course not."

"And now Quatre has no ties to this place," Wufei reasoned.

Duo stumbled back, feeling as if he took a punch to the gut. His mind whirled in confusion and something akin to horror. Wufei was right. They had no more ties to this place. They could go home. They had what they were supposed to find. They could be lost in legend once again. No one could harm them anymore. He should have been happy. So why did he feel suddenly so sick to his stomach at the mere thought of leaving this place?

Wufei was staring at Duo carefully, seeing the rampant of emotions across the other elf's face. "You don't want to leave!" He accused. "Is it because of Heero?"

"No!" Duo blurted, turning away and running his fingers nervously through his hair. "Odin is dead to me, there is nothing more I want from him."

"Except the Myst," Wufei reminded gently.

Duo nodded dumbly. Yes, except the Myst. He had to get the Myst back. And then, he would have to leave. Why did it hurt so much? He knew he hated Odin now, so why did the mere thought of leaving him distressed him so?

Wufei clasped the young Elite's shoulder. "You need to get it back and quick. Our people need you and it."

Duo swallowed convulsively, eyes trained steadily on the ground. He knew all that. He knew his people needed the life blood of the forest. So why was it so difficult to walk away? Despite what remnant emotion he felt for Heero, Odin, or whoever the hell he may be, Duo knew that there was no possibility of them ever having a future together. There was just too much history and resentment. It didn't even matter if Heero actually stole the Myst or not anymore. It was because of Heero that innocent elflings, bereft of magic, died before their time.

"I know," Duo finally mumbled. "I know."

He would have to get the Myst back. And unfortunately for him, there was only one way he knew.

XXxxXX

Duo was left pacing the room after once again sitting with his brother long after he cried himself to sleep. If his brother was any indication and Trowa considered breaking up with him, Duo didn't really have to guess the young lord's emotional condition right now. He sincerely pitied them, but he was quite glad that they were no longer together. It reminded him too much of his own situation and how it ended the first time. He didn't want history to repeat itself quite so often and claim more lives. If that was to happen, there was no one to blame but Duo. He started the cycle to begin with.

Now he would have to end it.

He dropped onto his bed, cradling his head in his hand. There was just so many things wrong with his plan. If it was actually a plan to begin with. Perhaps it was something borne of his own desires. But it was the only way he knew. This method was not only beyond trite and stupid, it was probably one of the worst thing he could think of that he should be doing right now.

But deep within, he really couldn't think of any other way. He had tried connecting with the Myst, but it was like speaking to a stranger. It was either the years apart of the alien human mind had changed the Myst's behaviour. It was mostly dormant now, lying just below the fragile frame of Odin's… no, Heero's skin. He was puzzled as to how Heero had retained so many of Odin's memories. The elves were more attuned to its magic than humans, having so many centuries of adaptation to it. But a human's mind would never been able to retain a past life's memories.

Whatever the reason or the case maybe, he had to act, despite his oddly heavy heart. He didn't delude himself into thinking he no longer loved Odin. There was a generous amount of hate there as well, but he still hungered for his former lover's touch. And for that, he would never forgive himself.

He stared down at his heart broken brother, trails of dried tears marring his pale cheeks. "I'm sorry you have to go through the last thing I wanted you to go through. I failed in protecting you," he whispered, running fingers through Quatre's soft blond hair. "But I can get you back home. You can find healing there."

Duo straightened, resolutely squaring his shoulders. He had to do it – now, before he lost anymore nerve. He quietly exited the room.

The walk was long and painful to the King's chambers. He was thankful that no one stopped him, wanting to speak with him or otherwise. His people knew he was no longer the light hearted, playfully mischievous elf any longer. In his place was an elf full of pain of betrayal and haunted eyes that saw too much. While they respected him, the pain in his eyes was agonising to see, and there was nothing anyone could do about it.

He stood outside the King's chambers, staring at the heavy door.

"The King asked for you?" One of the guards on duty asked.

Duo shook his head. "I just… I just wanted to see if he," he swallowed. "He needed anything."

The guard smiled kindly at the trembling little slave and opened the door. "He's still awake. Go ahead."

Still, Duo stared at the opened doorway. Should he walk through it? He didn't know what waited on the other side. Was it a future free of slavery and torture, or was it a future as bleak as the present? His mind warred with his heart and both losing at the same time. He was doomed to be alone either way.

Perhaps he deserved one night for himself? Just one night?

"Aren't you going in?" The guard asked kindly. He had been one of the few who saw past the slave collar and sympathised with all who wore it. He was also one of the few who found Duo's defiance of their King amusing. It would give the young King some perspective, he was heard to comment.

Duo's smile was wobbly at best as he tried to reassure the guard by stepping through the door.

King Heero's massive chamber never seemed so small. Never seemed so stifling. Every step Duo took was slow and painful, as if weighed down by heavy stones. He didn't want to do this… yet, he did but then again, he didn't. However, he did.

He growled softly to himself. He was going insane.

Heero, who was in the midst of changing into his nightclothes, whirled around, surprised to see Duo in his rooms. He had expected a servant, but not Duo. The slave usually didn't come in past dark, and the young king didn't have the heart to force him ever since he regained his memories of his past life. He wished fervently, with all his heart that Duo would come to his chambers without being forced even if it meant to just complete his duties as his body servant. There were some more indignantly perplexed courtiers who didn't understand why he took such behaviour from something as lowly as a slave. After all, Duo was not even a servant. The sight of their normally stoic king flying off the handle was a reminder to never say something like that again. Well, in his presence anyway.

Duo knew that now, more than ever, the rumours that Heero was have more benefits of a body servant than normal was circulating the castle like wildfire. But there was precious little he could do.

"Your Majesty," Duo began, taking a step closer to Heero. He felt like he was using Heero, or at least going to use him. But this was vital and absolutely necessary. So why did it feel so wrong?

Heero's breath caught. Duo had never spoken directly to him before. "What's wrong?"

Duo stepped closer and placed one tentative hand on the man's chest. He took a deep breath and let the glamour drop. He stared into Heero's eyes as the deep blue was clouded by amazement.

"Nefros," Heero breathed, cupping the elf's cheek. "You forgive me?" He asked.

"I… I…" Duo couldn't bring himself to lie either way. He didn't know if he did or did not forgive Heero, Odin, but this had to be done. His people depended on him. "Let's have tonight, let's be together tonight," he avoided Heero's piercing gaze, his fingers fumbling the buttons on his shirt. Warm hands closed over his almost frigid fingers. Fingers tipped his head up.

"Are you sure about this?" Heero asked, his tone gentle but there was desire burning in his eyes. And so much hope.

Duo shook his head. "No!" He blurted watching the hope slowly fade from Heero's eyes. "I am not sure about anything anymore. I am supposed to hate you, and I do! But then… I don't, I can't." He found himself speaking truthfully, words that he thought buried deep within surfacing. "I… I…" He sighed, staring at the ground in dejection.

Warm hands cupped his cheeks and pulled his head up. Heero smiled gently at him. "I understand," he whispered. "Nothing I do can will make you believe that I didn't steal your treasure but I never meant to leave you. I really wanted use to be together. I really wouldn't have mind living in that little cottage of yours."

"You did steal it," Duo answered softly. He laid his hand on Heero's chest. "Somehow, you did take the myst with you when you… left."

Heero looked like someone punched him in the gut. He laid his hand over Duo's gripping hard. He shook his head in denial. "I didn't… how… It's not possible," he finally blurted.

Duo sighed heavily. "Odin, when you left, my cottage, that misty place… there wasn't anymore. I don't know how either. But you caused a lot of people a lot of hurt."

Guilt chased its way across Heero's expression, slowly giving way to horror. He never really knew the enormity of what he did, or didn't do as this case may be.

"Little babies died, children falling over, their heart stopping," Duo's choked out, his eyes haunted at the memory of the carnage. "That's why I can never forgive you, or forgive myself. I was supposed to protect them, but I brought the enemy into our sanctuary."

Heero pulled the elf close, squeezing tightly. Knowing now what he did, he doubt he could ever forgive himself as well. He deserved every ounce of hatred Duo poured out to him. But he didn't even know how he did it. He never meant to steal it. He had swore to himself not to do it. How had it happened then?

Duo's emotions teetered indecisively between confusion and determination. His heart was breaking all over again. A thought hit him like a force of a hurricane – Heero didn't know. He really didn't know. But then again, how could he? Then again, did it mean that he had no right to be angry at Odin… then who had he to blame… but himself? It felt his world was crumbling around him. Hatred and revenge was the only thing driving him this far, and for so long. But with that, what else could he do? There was no reason to go past this.

The cries of innocent children and tiny babies echoed painfully in his head, accusing him. A moan may have passed his lips, he didn't know but the next moment, Heero had half carried half dragged him to the bed and was peering anxiously into his face.

"Nefros, love, are you alright?" Heero patted Duo's cheek anxiously. "I'm so sorry, I didn't know what would happen. I should have never, never, never, gone into the Forest. It's my fault…"

"No," Duo cut him off softly, a finger touching Heero's lips lightly. "The fault is all mine. I was the one who told you my secret. It warned me, but I didn't listen, I never listen. I had to fall in love with you."

Heero gasped. "Don't say as if it is a crime! You fell in love, that's all." He couldn't keep his hands off Duo, constantly touching his skin, hair, shoulders and anywhere else. This was a non-defensive Duo, so much like the memories, the dreams that he had. This was the person he fell in love with. "I was wrong not to come back. I was wrong to give up trying to come back. I should have fought harder, should have tried to escape my father's guard better."

"Enough," Duo almost yelled, anguished. Two of them torn apart by circumstances beyond their control and nothing could ever bring them back together again. He wondered if Heero was finally seeing that as well? "Tonight is supposed to be for each other, to be together… one last time." The last came out hushed and bitter.

Heero jerked back. "One last time? What? Why?"

Duo wriggled out of Heero's grasp, sitting back against the headboard. "Don't you get it Heero, Odin? We have to leave," he bit his lip as he saw the colour fade from Heero's face. "There has been too many rumours in regards to the elves and Kyrin. More will generate too much interest. Kyrin is at a stage where it cannot afford a war and people will try to invade if we are around."

Heero still looked stricken but he could understand the situation. He shook his head in resignation, suddenly looking much older than he actually was. "You always are my tutor in the politics, aren't you, my love?"

"That's what happens when you live a disgusting long life," Duo smiled weakly, feeling a surge of warmth at the endearment.

The man took a deep breath, closing his eyes until he released it. He stared down at Duo's much loved violet eyes. "Then let us have one night more together. Let it be untainted by past memories, or past wrong doings. Let it be as it has ever been, about the two of us… and squirrels and walnuts," he grinned at the end, watching some colour seep back into Duo's cheeks.

"I keep telling you, there was nothing about those squirrels and walnuts!" Duo huffed indignantly but his lips were smothered by Heero's. He knew that this would probably be the last time they will ever be together. But he found himself keeping silent about his true motive for offering himself for one night.

The myst must have caught Duo's essence in Odin the last time they made love. And when Odin was attacked, the myst did what it was supposed to, protect its master. Even sentient mysts could make mistakes. Perhaps that was true, but Duo didn't want to think of the other alternative, that the myst did this to teach Duo a lesson. A very harsh lesson in responsibility. Master Weavers had no use for romantic love. And entanglements of the heart brought nothing but grief to one and all.

Duo well the awesome presence of the myst rushing back into him, his body and able vessel for its power just as their love play ended. Soon they were cuddled together, desperate to get as close as possible. Duo couldn't remember the last time he was held like this. He felt cherished, loved and desired. But that was going to be the end of it. There wasn't going to be anymore love other than the familial kind for Duo. He understood now why each Master was exiled from the rest of society. Why solitude was so important.

I am so sorry it was so hard for you, Master, the myst was sombre, sad.

Duo startled.

"What's wrong?" Heero asked drowsily. He didn't seem to feel any different. Not like how Duo felt when the myst disappeared so many years ago.

"Nothing, just a little cold, that's all," Duo was shocked how easy a lie came to him these days.

Those children died because you wanted to teach me a lesson? Duo demanded disbelievingly.

Their lives were worth the destruction of our people. Your love would have ruined us all. You know that. And besides, those lives are still within the Forest, and therefore still within my control. Your destruction on the other hand, would have been permanent and for the elves as well. You cannot fall.

Duo wished that damn myst could be less logical and practical and a whole less smug. So many deaths! So much suffering, and for what? For me to learn a lesson? My brother, the warriors, everyone?

The elves are strong. They have persevered. They will continue to do so. You would have been an excellent Master, but you wished for other things. Now you know, as Master, you cannot have your own life, other than for your people.

You could have explained it to me.

I did, Master. I told you this Man would be the destruction of our people. He might still be.

Duo snorted softly. And that prediction came true, with you being responsible for it.

If there wasn't part of you within the Man, I wouldn't have been able to hide in him. As it was, your choices had everything to do with what happened.

As did your choice of following him. This isn't my fault alone. If you hadn't taken such actions, none of this would have happened!

I believe in fate, the myst reasoned. I believe I was meant to make this choice. I believe it was supposed to make this choice.

Duo smouldered. Well, you are wrong! There is no such thing as fate. I make my own fate. Everything could have been avoided. And I didn't have to spend centuries hating only to find out that there was nothing to hate.

The myst seemed to sigh. There was apparently no getting through to his Master. He didn't want to see that this was meant to be, that this path was the one that should be taken. The myst didn't understand the workings of fate sometimes, but even something as all power as it was beholden to fate's whimsical fancies. I am sorry that this was so difficult for you. I will not apologise for what I have done, nor will I. It is something that you must learn. That is all, Master.

And that was indeed a bitter lesson

tbc