Chapter Two - Poliwag Were Are Thou!?

I couldn't ruddy, duddy believe it! All my emotions boiled up like a wizards cauldron, ready to devour a couple of Raticate tails. I was alone, in this gummy park in Colcuku City, all I bluddy came here for was that blue lump! I must admit, Poliwag wasn't my favourite of Pokemon but I needed him, what if I starve out here?

I turned around to look up to the vacant tree house, the dwabbing twonks had already left about ten minutes/seconds ago, it was time to find out who Moose was and retrieve my Poliwag, even of he's a disastrous lump.

Half of the house was missing, how this happened? I can't say, but it seemed that floating marshmallow shot something gloopy when it attacked Professor Chi Chi's laboratory of witchcraft. I made my way back in her elevator, its not like I had enough to deal with but blimey, my sick was still in there! Them ruddy green jellydewps! That's all I have to say, Zizi can not be dealing with jellypuke right now, not ever. The elevator took its time, just like before, I was sure I would be at the top right now in a minute. This tree trunk was hollow, it was like a house for the claustrophobic, welcoming them all in an unfriendly manner, how peculiar I thought.

The elevator had finally risen to the summit, the doors slid open and wala! The witches lair was present, much more messy than last time. I skipped to the branch that held my starter Pokemon in it only twenty minutes ago. How could I, Zizi, be so ridiculously stupid to leave my Pokemon here!? Whilst rummaging through her desks I noticed a door in the back, mammoth is was, absolutely dust infected and mammoth. I creaked it open and oh my gosh, it was blooming babbatastic! Pokeballs, hundreds of them... This is it I thought, as I looked at the Pokeballs, all lined up on the shelves, my starters...

I ran my fingers on the transparent glass that shielded them from beautiful ladies like myself, each one had a label written in Octillary ink.

'#522: Blitzle, when thunderclouds cover the sky, it will appear. It can catch lightning with its mane and store the electricity.'

Ew, my shimmering hair and unique golden strings do not mix with electricity.

'#624: Pawniard, ignoring their injuries, groups attack by sinking the blades that cover their bodies into their prey.'

Ermm, what? I'm looking for a Pokemon not an assassin. Professor Chi Chi told me I could only pick between three, when she has all of these back here? I hope getting kidnapped is a good lesson for her.

'#215: Sneasal, a smart and sneaky Pokémon. A pair may work together to steal eggs by having one lure the parents away.'

Hmmm, I'm smart and sneaky! How odd, I feel like something twallytwitting just happened, I grabbed number two one five and released the Pokemon into the lab. A stunning creature was released, flaunting its pink palm like tail and scratching its elongated ear with its muddy white claws. Jimmangjoolapy! I have found my starter, Poliwag could use a good kidnapping anyway, I knelt down to my new partner, to introduce him to my world.

'Welcome to Flumplop! You're my flumsyclobber now.'

It didn't really go down well, the ruddy thing scratched my cheek! Patience I thought however, the best champions are those that can deal with such predicaments, and I, Zizi, is a champion. I petted the thing like I had known it for years, maybe I was one in another life? Who cares, I just wanted to be on my rumping ways.

'Sneasel.' It chippered.

'Zizi.' I retaliated back.

The Sneasel hissed at me, what was this? This Pokemon was supposed to adore me, like how a flower adores the tootyfruities of the blazing winter. The Pokemon did a little ballet and replied to my snide remark.

'Sneasal!' It hissed.

I knew this was a contest so I head banged my golden locks back and forth and pulled a pose.

'Zizi!' I hissed back.

'Sneasal!'

My floral backpack started talking just as Sneasal said its yeggen name!

'Sneasel, the smart and sneaky Pokémon, it makes its opponents flinch by suddenly showing the claws hidden in its paws.' My backpack told me, I swivelled my luscious arms over my head and pulled my bag over it. I digged deep to find the noise and to my surprise it was that strange contraption, Chi Chi handed to me earlier. The reddish red machine began to talk again, just as I pulled the ruddy thing out.

'Sneasal knows these attacks; Scratch, Leer, Screech and Faint Attack. This Sneasal is female and has the ability Inner Focus, which allows the Pokemon to not flinch during battle, Sneasal is also a dark, ice type.'

There was a slight inconsistency with awkward silences, about twenty seconds past and the hallywongtong spoke again.

'Please help me, I'm trapped in this machine,' the Pokedex told me, I didn't say anything, I didn't know what to exactly.

'Chi Chi trapped me in this machine to aid beginning trainers, my name is Dexter! I need your help! Please free me!?'

'No!' I replied as I chucked the Pokedex into my rucksack. Very peculiar things Pokedexes, I always wondered how they stored so much knowledge, however I couldn't free the little man that lived in my machine, otherwise I wouldn't have a Pokedex and gollyploppers, I need a Pokedex.

I turned to my Sneasal, 'so...' I said, trying to break the ice.

'Sneee...'

'We are going to be partners by the way, wether you like it or not.'

The Pokemon crossed its arms and pouted, like me. I returned Sneasal to its Pokeball and the capsule shrunk, just like it had took some dillydop potion, making it easy for me to fit it on my trainer belt.

Perfect I thought as I left the back room and headed back into the overgrown laboratory. Squirtle shells, Zubat droppings and jars of Krookodile tears flooded this cabinet I was having a nose in. I grabbed a jar of the tears as they are very hard to come by and plopped them in my bag. The next draw I opened was dusty, flattering dust fluttered as I pulled the knob.

'How very peculiar,' I remember saying as I saw a lot of weird but interesting objects. A dawn stone, a couple of dragon scales, kings rock, three leaf stones, razor claw and a few up-grade disks. I took a lot of the items, I borrowed them to be precise, actually I still need to give them back.

On my way back down to Colcuku park I started to remember Poliwag, it began to make me hungry and to my surprise I actually stepped in my own lumpy puke that was still in the elevator. Why hadn't no one cleaned this up yet!? Just because Chi Chi had been kidnapped was no excuse.

When I left the ruddy elevator the park was packed again and worse of all the police were present, the snobby officer Jenny approached me, running her elegant fingers across her uniform hat.

'Good day,' she says, I know she thinks in the one responsible for all the damage done to Chi Chi's laboratory/tree house/witch lair.

'Hello...'

'Could you please explain to me what you was doing up in Professor Chi Chi's lab?'

Darn it, I was hoping she was just going to complement my baby, pink dress that only reached my flumboius knees, my roommate back 'home' made it for me, only fourteen years of age she was too!

'I was looking for Chi Chi' I say, I wasn't though, I was looking for Pokemon, Pokemon to steal! Oh tremmytiblets! I'm gonna get arrested!

'Did you find her?'

'No...'

'Shes lying!' A robotic voice propelled from my rucksack.

'What was that!?' The officer asked as I punched my rucksack.

'I have no idea officer, now if you don't mind I need to bombardackle out of here for I, Zizi am on a journey,' a bold move on my part I must say.

'Sure...'

It was that easy, I know.

I slowly walked away, Dexter was now screaming! I looked back at officer Jenny, she was weary but to be frank I don't feel her. I don't feel she even cared, she probably just wanted to go home and dillydangle her bodywonk in cherry chopper doughnuts. I slowly walked faster, and faster, and slower.

Once I was out of sight of the investigation I jumped into my rucksack and fished out my Poledex.

'What the sevillysump are you doing?'

Dexter burped, then replied with, 'I need you to help me!' In his croaky, robotic voice of course.

'Please help me!?'

'No...'

I then chucked him back in my rucksack and continued my journey. It's very peculiar how a robot can burp, it can't devour any scrumptious trettytwallas, can it? I have a little man, living in my Pokedex, could he be trusted? Probably not, he was imprisoned by Chi Chi so, yes, probably not.

I left the warm cold city of Colcuku, and entered route one. I came to a disfigured sign; 'Route One: the ever changing, ever shifting and ever quakeqacking route.'

My orphanage 'friends' told me about this place, the gigantic trees and rugged road would, from time to past, shift. They told me this route always changed, and there was nothing you could do about it, how odd. The concept of ever changing scenery is nothing out of the ordinary in Flumplop however, shame really.

I stepped one step backwards and the road erupted. Rocks swirled around the concrete roads and the trees dispersed in themselves, the road pathway melted and formed a ziggy zaggy shape that travelled in peculiar patterns. Grass melted in patches, whilst in others it grew miraculously! Huggletub flowers popped and exploded an aroma of stale candy, a few more trees expanded near the pathway and then the confused route rested, like a soothing lullaby had gracefully been chanted.

It would of been a shame if I sank into the road too I thought. I felt very airy travelling in this route, very airy indeed. I flimsily skipped along the pathway, I've come to realise how energetic I really am, considering I live of sweets and honeycomb chocolate, usually drizzled in raspberry syrup.

Whilst I was skipping a very odd Pokemon made its way in front of me. A wiggy green body with black hole eyes that belonged in the galaxies, hypnotising circles patternized it's wormy body.

'Peee!' It said in a creepy, cute tone.

'Caterpie!' The smooshy thing added.

'Caterpie, the worm Pokemon. Caterpie released a stench from its red antenna to repel enemies. It grows by molting repeatedly.'

My backpack was once again talking to me, sigh. I pulled my Pokedex out to hear it better, the ruddy thing had only one thing to say to me however.

'Please help me!?'

'No.'

Caterpie, I thought to myself, how very, very peculiar. I didn't really understand how the Pokemon didn't get squillyswamped in the rocks that clashed earlier, I didn't care however I was gonna' catch the thing.

'Come on out, Sneasal!'

I released my sinister creature onto the route, Sneasal's eyes locked on Caterpie, I could tell this was no competition however.

'Sneasal, scratch!' I commanded, my first ever command it was, how plumping pickles is that!?

Sneasal leaped into the air, graceful she was, she was an innocent murderer, hasting to grasp her prey. Slash, she went, repeatedly tearing the Caterpie.

'Thats enough!' I shouted as I reached in my rucksack to grab a Pokeball, only to realise that yes, I, Zizi had forgot to pickup my Pokeballs.

'Darn boobatass!'

Both my radishfull Pokemon and the healthy injured Pokemon looked at me, I don't quite recall why I was embarrassed, it was just Sneasal and Caterpie.

I returned my Sneasal in shame, I was so done with myself. How could I, Zizi, forget my Pokeballs!? The things I need for a ruddy adventure! As I continued walking I had forgotten about the plompy Caterpie that I had attacked, of course it was angry with me. If a beautiful, golden giant released a monster and made it attack me I would be angry too. Actually, I would be more than angry, I would gather every tutugalaump and climb to the tallest unicrox and throw them to the dead floor! So, I understand completely why Caterpie was mad, but really, I don't see why it had to use string shot on me and leave me for ruddy death!

First of all I forget my starter Pokemon, then a find out a weird little man is living in my Pokedex, and then dear readers, I finally come across a Pokemon but realise I have no Pokeballs! Not only that but said Pokemon decided to attack me and leave me squirming on the floor, enveloped in its icky string! A very odd day indeed.

It must have been about twenty ruddy minutes, then, out of absolutely everywhere, the route began to shift. This was it, the end of Zizi, the end that ended at the beginning. The pathway tilted, I attempted to crawl out of the cocoon I was concealed in, but no luck. Instead I tipsy turned down the route as the path tilted upwards.

'Weeeeeeeeeee!' I squealed as I rolled down and up.

The string shot saved me from injuries, and to be frank it was great fun, completely bonkerastic! But great fun.

It must have only been about 43 seconds until I clashly walloped something.

'Owe!' A snobbish voice screamed.

I was so eager to see who I used as a landing mat, something I now half regret. Well manufactured nails ripped through the silky, enclosed cocoon so only my head was showing. Honestly, picturing myself right now! I must have looked ludicrously ridiculous! My round bobble head with a body with no shape looked up to see the most gobbygobbler of a trainer. Fuchsia hair down to her button butox, eyes that gleamed even in the brightness. Jealous!? No... Envious? Yes. How could a teenage girl be so perfect, her ruddy figure was that of a mannequins compared to my plompy plump of a belly.

She laughed at me, who wouldn't? However, I, Zizi deserve to be treated like a queen, not some late night comedy show on Flumplop international.

'This what you do for fun?' Her feline voice asked me.

'Yes... It beats cleaning a Dwubber at the orphanage.'

'Ew.'

'Indeed, so you just going to stand there or you gonna get me out if this dappery shell?'

'Maybe.'

Seriously? Was she seriously serious? Just let me out you gobby tonk!

'Please...'

I was begging it, I needed to though, if I was ever gonna get out if this mess to kick her messy blobbablob across the route then she'd be the one to untie me.

'Whats in it for me?'

What was in it for her? I did see the snobby girls point, I had to quickly think on the spot, something I want very skilled at.

'I have a leaf stone?'

'A leaf stone will do nicely, anything else?'

A slap in the face?

'No, sorry, that's all I really have.' I told her, hoping she would take my offer but I was in denial, she had me tied up, literally!

'Well then, I guess I'll just leave you here...'

She began to walk away, swerving her bum cheeks and pouting her ruby lips.

'Fine!' I gasped, 'I also have some weird upgrade things, and a dawn stone! How about it!?'

She turned back around and un-twizzled me from the sticky duvet that surrounded my chubby body.

'You're welcome. Now, my goods?'

'Alright, alright, don't get your clumwakkles in a twist.'

I reached into my bag and handed her what I said I would, I didn't really want them things anyway, I didn't even know what they were for to be honest.

'Help me somebody!'

'Shut up, Dexter!' I shouted into my rucksack.

The twiggy girl looked at me, I just faked a smile.

'Why are you talking to your bag?' She asked in a comical way.

'I was-'

'Someone please help me!'

'Shut up!' I screamed once more.

'What is that?' She asked, I must admit I knew it was coming, the way she was looking at me.

'Nothing...' I reply as I zipped up my bag.

What's your name?' She asked me whilst eying up my trainer belt.

'Zizi,' I reply, whilst also eying up hers, two Pokeballs is all I could see, but baloney, that was one more than me!

'I see you're a trainer?'

'I am indeed.'

As the 'trainer belt' wasn't an obvious give away.

'My names, Crusha and I would like to battle you.'

Of course she wanted to battle, who wouldn't? A strong, beautiful and independent woman like myself gets asked loads of demanding things. Like, 'how is your hair so perfect? What moisturiser do you use for that bombastic skin?' And of course, 'would you please battle me because you're just so flamboglopper!?'

I never turn down a fight, not even with the tank Helga back at the orphanage in Galgop! And boy could she fight, I heard she even ate a couple of the orphans.

'I would love to.'

This was my time for revenge, this was my time for Goldilocks of the future to take control. Crusha walked about thirty feet away from me, a bit too confident, but so was I, I guess. She released her triangular Pokemon, and my oh my.
'Snorunttt!'
What is that thing I wondered, dancing around the pathway.

'Go, Sneasal!'

I released my precious creature onto the route, once again it made eye contact with the enemy and she already knew she was going to win.

'Snorunt! Headbutt!'

The happy, cheerful Pokemon ran swiftly across the rocky road, I couldn't really think to be frank, I've never been in a battle before, what do I do exactly? Yes, I've seen some battles on t.v, most of them being documentaries on Benjamin Lockheart, a gym leader from up north who is quite the charmer. Well I've never actually met him, but his yellow hair always waves at me, so I assume he is.

Anyway after all that thinking I didn't even realise but Sneasal was on the floor, headbutt landed a direct hit and I could tell Sneasal wasn't happy with me, jimmanyjel! What have I got myself into!?

'You know when you battle, you don't just stare into space, you actually have to attack or defend, haha!' Crusha yelled at me, patronisingly.

'You know when you battle, you don't just stare into space, you actually have to attack or defend,' I mimicked under my breath, giving her the most dumbest and grambleting voice ever.

'Sneasal, faint attack!'

Sneasal slowly became transparent and headed in for the kill, sneaky and elegant, a combination that only works for me and my Pokemon.

'Snorunt! Icy wind!'

Snorunt decided to jump in the air and twirl, her triangle body was confusing me as it spun around and around, quickly formulating cold ice that surrounded the make shift pitch into wind. My Sneasal unfortunately hit the wall of wind as she went in for its attack, causing my jollyglapper of a Pokemon to lose its focus and bounce back slightly, now injured from the defensive icy wind attack.

'Snorunt, double team!' Crusha exclaimed with confidence.

About seventeen Snorunt's were now present, as if one wasn't enough to deal with, now there was now about seventeen! Bugger me blubber! Sneasal was as confused as I was, how is this possible? Crusha looked at me hideously as her Pokemon formed a circle around Sneasal.

'Snorunt! Icy wind!'

Sneasal looked at me, begging for help but I just didn't know what to do. Snorunt did however, and about a million icy winds formed around Snorunt's wide, gleaming mouths and unleashed its blustering cold upon Sneasal who afterwards fainted. A tough loss for me, unfortunately. I returned my Pokemin and bowed my head in shame, how could, I, Zizi lose to such a snobby lickletwop!

'You could of at least put up a fight.' She proudly announced as she walked away, along the path of route one.

I, dear reader am now going to promise you something, I will find this girl. I will pursue her ruddy ways and challenge her to a match, Sneasal will beat her and that rockyluckart, Snorunt and we will be champions. I, Zizi, will face the Flumplop gym leaders, compete in the league and win! I have no use for losing, no use for Crusha and certainly no use for Dewtwoppers!