Chapter Eleven

When a tourist comes to New York they have few complaints, but they always seem to be the same. As soon as you come into the city you're stuck in traffic. It's almost impossible to drive. It is impossible to make a turn onto another street because, whether they're supposed to or not, there is always a pedestrian walking out in the way. Even in the dead of winter. It may be freezing cold, but that doesn't stop the everyday routine of New York City.

Then there are sounds. The tourists complain about the intensity and volume of them. The noise is one thing during the day, but if you're not used to city life, you will not be used to a city's night sounds. All day and all night long you hear traffic. Honking of horns, the starling sound of screeching breaks, the swoosh of a never ending line of cars driving by. You also hear the people of the city. Angry drivers with road rage, people yelling out of windows to those on the sidewalks down below. The busy window shoppers gossiping loudly or ooh-ah-ing at the sites or window displays. At nights its crowds talking about eh show they just saw or a younger group heading out to a night club or bar.

Finally it's the lights. Tourists like the multicolored lights that remind them of Christmas all year round, but only when they're awake. They think it's the most beautiful thing until it's time for them to turn out their nights to go to sleep. The lights of the rest of the city never go out. When they want to go to sleep, they don't realize the rest of the city doesn't go to sleep with them. The pretty blinking lights soon turn into annoying flashes to the eyes of a tired tourist. When they close their eyes, they can still see the multicolored lights all around them.

Olivia never understood these kinds of complaints. Olivia doesn't see the city that way. Olivia goes out the door in the morning and for the most part she likes what she sees. If she doesn't like something, she'll try and turn it around. She doesn't like traffic, but counters it with a few perks form her job. If they need to get somewhere quick, they can put the siren on and are allowed through. Of course, they cannot always do that; it would be an abuse of their privileges, but still, Olivia doesn't mind sitting in traffic. Spending that much time with anyone would driver her crazy. Anyone except one. Elliot. She likes using that time to get to know each other, laugh together, and just… talk.

When Olivia's in the city, she doesn't hear noise. She hears sounds- almost music. She like show the sounds are consistently inconstant. The car doors slamming are like a drum beat keeping a steady rhythm. The horns honking from the impatient drivers are more like musical horns, like a trumpet player anxious to play its solo. You might be able to compare tire screeches to a violinist running her bow across the strings or a pianist running his fingers down the keys of the piano from one end tot eh other. The people come in, too. The murmur of people far away helps carry the tune like background singers filling the space between the music notes. The many people talking at once blends into a single sound. The music of the city is almost magical… like the lights.

The lights are Olivia's favorite part of the city's magic. The different colors of the city show the different moods of New York. They reflect Olivia's feelings and moods as well. In the tourist areas especially, you'll find just about every color you can name and all of those in between. They have blue lights. They stick out in Olivia's mind on bad days. Days when she's upset about something. Maybe a perp got away, a victim got hurt, a new vic refuses help, or worse; when she's been fighting with Elliot. Blue has been sticking out a lot lately. Starting right before she left, and even brighter when she returned. She also sees a lot of red after fighting with Elliot. Red is for angry. Not necessarily angry at him, as much as angry at herself. Yellow and bright green, like lime green, seem even brighter when she's in a good mood. When she's cheerful and happy. When a perp is sent to jail, a victim gets justice; Olivia feels good about herself and feels good about what she does for others.

Of all the colors, pink lights are her favorite. It makes her feel so good! She sees more pink lights when she's seen Elliot. They shine so much brighter on those days. It almost distracts her. She can't help but wonder if Elliot notices… if he notices her mind wandering off, or notices the pink lights and what pink is usually associated with. The pink lights are like a permanent Valentine's Day display. Pink reflects Olivia's love.

The lights at night are even more special. The street lamps, from a distance, look like fireflies lining the streets as far as the eye can see. The headlights on distant cars are like fairies flying in pairs. Because of the excessive number of lights in the city, it's impossible to see the stars. That doesn't bother Olivia either. To see 'stars' you just look up towards the sky. The lights of the towering buildings look just as beautiful to Olivia as Van Goh's interpretation of the night sky in "Starry Night". Olivia wouldn't be able to go on without the city life. She would go insane in a "hick town" without any neon lights and where the town is so quiet the only sounds you hear are birds chirping. A place where you can't lean out your window and talk to your friend in the neighboring building because there's at least an acre of land between each house. Such a small town would be too big for her, too wide and open. She likes being able to walk outside and get whatever she wants within a block. If she couldn't walk to get something, she could have it delivered instantly.

Having the constant lights and sounds of New York are sort of a reminder to Liv. A reminder that if she went to bed the rest of the world wouldn't hold their breath waiting for her to wake up. There are two sides to that coin; it could be a positive or a negative reminder. The negativity is no matter what she does there will always be another rapist, murderer another perp. She knows she can't go after them all. If you try to chase two rabbits you end up losing them both. The positive is each perp she can't catch just gives her motivation to catch the next. Also, because she knows she can't do it all, she won't beat herself up about it. Usually. Though Olivia seems confident outside, she really has a low self esteem and a low tolerance of the criminals she deals with. She feels like she has failed at everything; failed at her life. She needs to have that motivation to get the next perp… it's the only way for her to feel like she makes a difference. The final positive view is she never feels alone. That's a plus for living in a big city. It's an extra protection. She learned this when she was in Oregon for the FBI. Olivia needs New York.

Olivia pulled her knees up to her chin and continued to look out the window thinking. Elliot opened the door a little.

Oh, yeah she needs Elliot, too.

Sorry for a lot of nothing. Day off for snow (what snow? Haha) means writing some fanfiction. I really want to keep writing because I'm writing chapter seventeen, typing chapter sixteen, and posting chapter eleven, but I'm afraid if I post too close together, you'll have to wait a long time for the next couple chapters because I should be researching for my issue analysis project…

I wonder if that made any sense…

Oh! And please keep reviewing… It's the only thing (other than caffeine) that gets me through my government class.