Chapter 10
"So what are we doing now?" asked Draco as they stepped out of the store together.
"What do you mean?" asked Hermione.
"Well, we're together. We might as well keep hanging out unless you have other plans, which I know you don't," said Draco.
Hermione shot him a look.
"I very well could have plans! How rude of you to assume differently," said Hermione crossing her arms while she continued to stare him down.
"Ok I'm sorry. Maybe I was wrong… what plans do you have?" he asked.
Hermione bit her lip partially because she was now frustrated with herself that she didn't think of a lie sooner! She didn't have an answer.
"Uhh! Fine! I don't have any are you happy?" she asked.
"Yes, actually. Now you can come with me to go get some butterbeer or something," said Draco.
This time Hermione gave him a confused look. This was still a bit too unusual for her.
"Is it really that bad hanging around me? I thought we had gotten over this by now," said Draco.
"No… it's not bad. Just weird. I'm still not used to it. I'm half waiting for the other Draco to come back," she said.
"Other Draco?" he asked and they started walking off in the direction of Diagon Alley which was around the corner.
"Yeah, you know the other Draco. Like the one from school. You are absolutely nothing like him. In fact I'm beginning to wonder if you're the same person at all. One of you owned the world and thought he should be worshipped and this one… well I'm still deciding. You're just different. Did the Malfoys have twin boys and one of you stayed hidden and now you've been let out?" asked Hermione with a laugh.
"Ha ha. Very funny," said Draco sarcastically but still with a smile, "But you're absolutely right. I used to think I owned the world. It was the way I was brought up to think and act."
"So can I ask what changed exactly?" asked Hermione.
Draco stiffened up a bit. He hadn't ever actually told anyone about this part of him. In fact no one had even cared in the first place. Most people still saw what he had been before. No one cared what he was now. He made the cautious decision to actually go ahead and talk to her. It might be nice for a change.
"The war of course. It started 6th year. You know what happened that night right, the real story?" he asked.
Hermione nodded and said, "Yeah. Harry was there. He told us that he saw you had disarmed Dumbledore but you didn't do anything after that."
"Exactly. I was excited to become a Death Eater until I actually became one. Sure I treated everyone horribly and sent a few hexes after you and your friends but I never actually hurt anyone. Watching all of that… it changes you," he said.
"Did you ever…?" asked Hermione without finishing.
"Kill anyone? No. Tortured yes, but never killed anyone. And I'm not proud of that. If I could have gotten out of it I would have," he said.
"Don't worry. You don't have to defend yourself to me," said Hermione looking at him with a smile on her face, "I figured that was the case anyways."
"How could you know that? You said it yourself you knew that side of me," he said.
"I did. But I kind of guessed you had changed when I looked at you that day in the manor," she said.
Draco winced at the memory. That still haunted him.
"I… " he started.
"No wait. Let me finish. I saw the way you looked torn at wanted to help me and to be loyal to your family as well. I just want you to know that I never held you responsible for that," said Hermione.
"Loyal to my family? I never mentioned that…" he said.
"I know," said Hermione looking at him with her own smirk, "I can just tell. I know you aren't and were never loyal to Voldemort."
"You said his name," said Draco.
"Fear of the name…"
"Only increases fear of the thing itself. I know I know. I heard you say it before. I was just saying," said Draco, "But anyways I still want to apologize. You may not hold me responsible but I hold myself responsible. I could have done something."
"Draco," said Hermione stopping him and turning him to face her, "It's ok. If you want forgiveness I'll give it to you. It's not your fault. I'm not scarred from this, well I mean I am, but I'm not mentally or emotionally scarred."
Draco's eyes widened, "You have scars? Shouldn't they have been healed? Can't someone fix it?"
Draco moved to take her arm and check, but she pulled it away.
"It's not a big deal! You don't need to see and punish yourself more! I can tell you will," said Hermione.
"Fine. Can you at least answer my questions?" he asked.
"Fine. It scarred because the dagger had magical properties. It was meant to scar. I tried for a while to get rid of them, but nothing works. In the end I gave up because I realize it's not a big deal. I am a Mudblood and maybe I'm proud of that now," she said confidently.
Draco winced again, "Please don't call yourself that. And I'm sorry for all those times I've called you that name."
"You were young and stupid," said Hermione with a smirk.
"Thanks," said Draco. He couldn't help but smile back. Especially when she smiled at him.
"Wait, so how did I not notice that when you tried on the dress?" he asked.
"Really? Are you really asking me that? Where were your eyes? Anywhere but my arm as I recall," said Hermione.
Draco couldn't help but give her his smirk.
"Ok. You're right," he said.
Hermione playfully hit him on the arm.
"Actually. I may be proud of it now, but it's still not something the public needs to see and think about or talk about. I cast a glamor charm whenever I don't have something to cover it," she said.
"Oh. So what about now? Is the charm still there?" he asked.
"You're checking to see if I'm lying? Of course I'm not. See?" she said and lifted up the sleeve of her shirt showing it to him.
His face immediately turned from a smirk to a look of sorrow and hurt. Hermione quickly covered her arm again realizing what he had just done. She glared at him again.
"You tricked me," she said holding her arm close to her body.
"Yes I did. Sorry. I'm still the old me sometimes when I don't get my way. I just wanted to see how bad it was," he said.
"Why? Why does it matter? It's in the past!" said Hermione angrily.
"And I can see you weren't completely truthful yourself. It still bothers you doesn't it? It may not be me that bothers you but in general this is still something you think about," he said.
Hermione just ignored him.
"I'm sorry," said Draco as he went to pull her into his arms to comfort her. She resisted, but it didn't work. Draco held her tight against him.
Hermione felt the tears in her eyes. He was right. She may be ok with some of it, but of course it still haunted her. She thought she was going to be slowly tortured to death. She didn't know if she would live past her teenage years.
"If you want to talk about it I'll listen just like you just listened to me," he said as he let go to look at her.
She quickly brushed her tears away and looked back at him.
"You never finished your story actually," she said.
"You're right. So, my change. I'm not going to lie to you, you were a big part of that change. I'd been told all my life you had dirty blood and when you bled it looked just like mine. I knew then everything had been a lie. I had to stick through it though to protect my mother. I already messed up once, if I did it again they would kill her. I didn't want to be responsible for that as well," said Draco as they kept walking, "I laid low for a while. I was in the manor but not really participating - only when I absolutely had to put up that façade. At Hogwarts I switched sides."
"Did anyone know you switched?" she asked.
"No. I just fought and knew there was a possibility I could die. I took that chance and then I ran with my family. After the trial my mother and I were acquitted through use of the veritaserum. My father is currently in Azkaban and it's been hard to work on rebuilding our name, but I'm working on it. It's a pretty cowardly story really," said Draco.
"What?" asked Hermione as she stopped him again, "How is any of that cowardly?"
"We ran after the war! I could have done so much more but I didn't because I was a stupid scared boy!" said Draco.
"Well think what you will, but I don't see coward at all. It takes a pretty brave person to do any small action against something that powerful," said Hermione.
They turned back to walking in silence.
"Thanks," said Draco quietly.
"You're welcome," said Hermione as she quickly reached over and squeezed his hand.
Draco was too surprised to grab her hand and hold it longer. He thought about reaching over for her hand now to see what she would do but he didn't want to ruin what they had right now.
"Still up for a butterbeer or have I scared you away?" asked Draco.
"Nice try. You have to do a lot more to scare me away. Besides I saw nothing scary. You're exactly the person I thought you were – after 6th year that is," said Hermione smiling at Draco.
"Thanks," said Draco again, "Thanks for listening. I don't think I've ever told anyone that."
"Any time," said Hermione with a smile, "And don't worry. You can trust me to keep this to myself."
"And you know you can talk to me as well now right? At least I would hope so after you know my deep dark secrets," said Draco.
"Yeah. Maybe I will. Some day," she said.
Draco nodded. He's take whatever he could get with her.
"You know, Granger, you're really not as bad as everyone says you are after all," said Draco with a smirk.
Hermione just shook her head and walked into the Leaky Cauldron.
Sorry sorry sorry! I swear I meant to update but life just keeps getting in my way!
This chapter was completely random and unplanned, but you writers know the story goes where it wants to haha. Hope you guys like it :)