Title: So Mean Part I

Words: 472

Summary: Zabuza faints

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"What…?" Zabuza was sure that his brain was not computing. Had he hit his head before coming into the room and ravaging his partner? Had he fallen asleep after sex and now he was having some very odd dream? No, it couldn't be a dream because his subconscious had nothing to do with what this black eyed man had just said to him. That and they hadn't had sex because Severus wanted to sit him down in the kitchen and talk to him.

"I said that I am pregnant," Severus stated once more, laying a hand on his flat stomach. Zabuza stared at that long fingered hand, flitting across his black covered stomach like pale spider legs. They were stained on the tips from the potions that Severus constantly brewed in the basement. He blinked several times and stared at the Magic User until he realized that the man was simply staring back at him.

"What…?" the shinobi said once more. He stood up and felt the cool wood beneath his feet and he began to pace the floor.

"Wizards have a special time of the month, much like a woman, in which case we are instantly impregnated. The date must have slipped my notice although I am sure that I told you about this phenomenon," Severus explained as if he were teaching him about a very boring potion that turned hair colors.

"I think I would REMEMBER if you told me that you could get PREGNANT!" Zabuza hissed, narrowing his eyes at the wizard. Severus simply tilted his head, completely unthreatened by the very dangerous shinobi.

"There is no need to become so hostile. Would you like to see?" Severus pressed his hand a little harder on his belly and Zabuza watched as a grey film appeared, inside was a small jellybean shaped thing surrounded by what looked like some fluid and a pouch. A womb… Severus had a womb… with a baby in it. Not just any baby… his baby.

"Oh my," Shizune gasped as she came in the kitchen just in time to see Zabuza hit the ground in a dead faint. She rushed to the man but stopped as she realized that Severus was practically howling in laughter. It wasn't a very nice sound in the sense that she knew that the man had done something foul to Zabuza but it was soon joined by little voices. She turned around and saw that they were standing in the entrance way.

"Sev is just so mean," TenTen said as an explanation, giggling into her hand.

"He played a prank on Zabuza-sama… apparently wizards can get pregnant," Haku added dryly to add on what his brown haired friend said. Shizune shook her head and set about making sure that the ninja was alright. Really, they were so damn silly in this house.