All That I'm Living For

Disclaimer: Inuyasha is not mine, so these characters are not mine.

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Chapter Eight

The entered the gates of the Western Palace the next day. Her Lord had decided it would be best to just carry her the whole way home instead of walking, so he picked her and carried her, and they were home in no time. A grateful Ah-Un came to greet her, nuzzling her neck until she laughed. "I am fine!" she exclaimed to the dragon.

"And what trouble did you get Lord Sesshomaru into this time, young lady?" Jaken said, coming at her with his staff.

Sesshomaru kicked him in the face. "Should you ever forget to mention anything pertaining to Rin's safety ever again, Jaken, I will kill you." He left the imp on the ground, a red foot print on his face.

"Wait for me, my Lord," Rin said, skipping over the body of Jaken. She walked behind her Lord.

"Walk with me, Rin," he said, not looking at her.

"Yes, my Lord." Rin took her place on his right and walked with him until they reached their rooms.

"When you are ready, come to me." He walked into his room and slid the door shut behind him.

Rin went into her cold room, closed the door, and then slid down until she was seated, her back leaning against the door. She was home. How she had missed being home, but she had also enjoyed her time with her Lord; oh god how she had enjoyed it. She giggled and got up, walking to her mirror and staring at her reflection with dismay. Her Lord had seen her like this? She was clean but her clothes were torn and battered, dirt and blood smeared all over the cloth. She gathered a new set of clothes and went to bathe.

The hot water soothed her tired muscles. She sighed and sank lower, until her nose was just above the water. Her thoughts were drawn back to last night, when her Lord had bathed with her; she could still feel his nails as they gently tugged at her hair. When he had stared at her and told her she was not ugly she wanted to jump and kiss him, but she refrained from doing so; at least she had spared herself that indignity. She may not be ugly in her Lord's eyes, but she was still human. How could she face him if she had jumped him, their naked bodies pressed together, their lips touching . . . . She sighed. That was something he would never commit to, and she should just stop dreaming about it. But she couldn't.

She got out, dried herself, and pulled on a clean yukata, dark purple with pink butterflies and a yellow obi. She slipped on her white tabi's and continued to dry her hair as she walked to her room. Her reflection was much improved now that she had bathed: her cheeks were red and her eyes refreshed. A soft knock sounded on the door.

"Come in," she said.

Master Jaken came in, his head down, not looking at her.

"Master Jaken, are you okay?" she said, turning around and looking at the little imp.

He looked up, tears in his eyes. "Rin . . . I am sorry. I didn't know you were in trouble."

She looked at him, confused. Where was the Master Jaken she knew and, well, knew.

"I spoke with my Lord, and, well, he didn't say much, but, he said that, um, you were kidnapped and-" Tears flooded his eyes and he threw himself at her feet.

Her eyes widened and she covered her mouth. What was wrong with this little green man? Why was he weeping at her feet?

"If anything had happened to you I don't know how I could live!" he said, his voice muffled by the tatami mat.

She kneeled down and placed her hand on his head; the skin was uncomfortable to touch, but she kept her hand there, trying to soothe him. "Oh, Master Jaken, I am fine; everything is fine. Lord Sesshomaru saved me."

"Only because he's alert; I didn't tell him you were going to fight a demon!" he wailed.

Rin grimaced. She liked Master Jaken better when he was fighting with her. "Master Jaken, don't worry about it. I am fine, our Lord is fine, and soon everything will be forgotten." She stood up.

"Will you forgive me?" he said, looking up at her from his bow.

She offered him her hand. "There is nothing to forgive, Master Jaken."

He took it and stood up, jumping from one foot to the other. "Please don't tell my Lord what I said."

She arched an eyebrow. "About how you can't live without me? Do you have a crush on me, Master Jaken?" She giggled, covering her mouth with her sleeve.

His eyes grew wide. "You insolent girl!" If he had his staff it looked like he would have hit her with it.

She laughed and shooed him out the door. "Don't worry," she whispered before she closed the door, "I won't say anything as long as you behave."

"What?! How dare you-" She closed the door, muffling his words. He stomped away from her door.

Rin combed her damp hair, releasing the knots. I wish he were here, brushing my hair for me, she thought. Her long back hair touched the floor as she sat in front of her vanity. She should wait until her hair was dry before she went to her Lord, but she couldn't wait, couldn't deny herself the pleasure of his company, even if it meant her hair would be wet and she would have to be careful to keep it from wetting his floors and her clothes.

She pulled her hair up and looked at her reflection, turning her face side to side. What if she put it up like Kagome did? It would kinda solve the problem of getting her obi and yukata wet, but not by much. She pulled her hair into a bun, using ivory hashi to keep it in place; she'd never realized how heavy her hair was until she piled it all on her head. But it kept her clothes dry and she wouldn't have to worry about wetting her Lord's fresh tatami mats. She loosed a few hairs from the bun, so her face wasn't pulled as severely back and grunted: she was ready.

She knocked softly on his door.

"Come."

She entered, looking at the ground, closing the door behind her, and then kneeled before him, her eyes still looking down. The hems of his robes were clean and white and he radiated wet heat; he had bathed.

"Rin, why are you looking down?" he said, lifting her chin.

"I, um, well, it's ah-" She didn't know. Ever since the bath last night she had felt a profound respect and nervousness around her Lord; she seemed to be reverting back to ceremonial formality.

"There is no one who can command you to bow before them," he said, releasing her chin.

Except you, she thought.

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Sesshomaru sucked in his breath when she entered the room; her hair was up, exposing the soft flesh of her neck. He wanted to bite into her, but stopped himself, sitting rigidly in his chair. Her small fingers combed through his hair as she brushed, and the silence was tense and heated. She lightly touched his ear as she brought his hair back away from his face and he shuddered.

"My Lord?"

He said nothing.

After she was done brushing she began to massage his shoulder, leaning into his body as she kneaded the tense muscles. She moved his hair out of her way and he leaned his head to the right, to give her easier access. Her scent increased at his action, and he could almost see her remembering the night she had kissed him on his neck. She leaned hesitantly against him, her breath hot on his right ear. He closed his eyes as she kissed his neck once more.

"Rin."

"I'm sorry my Lord," she said, jumping away from him.

He turned around and saw her trying to flee. "Do not go," he commanded, standing.

She stood at the door, her eyes on the ground, back to him, shaking.

He put his hand on her right shoulder, causing her to tense. He leaned down and whispered, "Do not be afraid." He kissed her neck, nuzzling the sensitive flesh with his nose.

She moaned and leaned against him, her eyes closed. Her scent increased and he felt the demon in him increase, his eyes ringed in red.

He turned her around and kissed her, forcefully, on the lips. Her arms circled his neck and she deepened the kiss, her tongue slipping into his mouth. His body pushed her against the door and his hips grated into her. She moaned again, and pulled away from him, looking into his eyes. "My Lord?"

He kissed her again, silencing her questions, leading her to the bed but never taking his lips from hers. The obi came undone and he pushed her yukata to the ground; she undid his clothes and they slithered into his bed. He covered her body with his and kissed her neck, sucking at it. She arched her back, pressing herself tightly against him, causing him to groan. His hand ran down her body, touching her hips and breasts. He turned over and held her to his chest. He pulled the hashi from her hair and it fell down around them, a black river next to his silver one.

She looked down at him, her eyes studying his face. He brushed the hair out of her face, behind her ears, cupping her cheek and softly running his claw under her eye. "Rin," he said.

"Sesshomaru," she replied softly. She blushed, her eye lashes fluttering.

He kissed her, drawing her down to his body, crushing her against him. He slipped his leg between her legs and felt the wetness there. She groaned as he rubbed his knee against her and sat up. Her nails scraped his chest as she admired his torso, and she leaned over and bit his nipple softly.

He growled and flipped her on her back. If anyone was going to do any biting tonight, it was he. He rubbed himself against her, and she bucked her hips, giving him entrance. "This will hurt for a moment," he whispered as he pushed into her. She clenched the sheets but said nothing, gritting her teeth as he entered her fully. He waited as she adjusted and began to thrust slowly, letting her get used to him. She moaned and he sped up.

"More," she said, gasping.

He pushed farther, faster.

"More," she said, dragging her nails down his back.

Faster.

She groaned and her hips began to move with him, meeting him as he thrust into her. He buried his head into her neck and licked the soft flesh there, growling as she took him deeper. He felt himself approaching a cliff and soon he jumped off, hearing her cries as they rang through his chamber, his teeth sunk deep into her neck. He lapped at the blood there as they came down from their high. He lay beside her and pulled her body to his, both sweating profusely.

"Rin," he whispered.

"Yes, Sesshomaru?" she said softly.

He smiled. "Nothing."

"You bit me," she said after a few minutes, gingerly touching the spot where his teeth had sunk into her flesh.

He held her tightly and nodded.

"Why?" She looked at him.

"You are my mate, Rin," he said softly.

She began to cry.

Perhaps he should have asked her if she wanted to be his mate; he had never mated with a human before. "Why are you crying?"

Her hands covered her face and her sobs were shaking the bed.

He pushed her back on the bed and hovered over her, trying to see her face. He pulled her hands away and was greeted with her smiling face.

"I love you, Sesshomaru," she said, pulling him down onto her body and kissing him.

He smelled her arousal and felt himself harden. He loved her.

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Rin woke the next morning, Sesshomaru's arm around her body. She sighed and snuggled closer to him, running her fingers over his chest. A deep rumbling emitted from his chest. "Are you purring, Sesshomaru?" She couldn't get enough of saying his name now, without the 'Lord' attached to it.

He smiled and opened his eyes, kissing her lightly on the head. "Dogs do not purr."

"That wasn't barking," she teased.

He shrugged. "It wasn't a purr either." He got up from the bed and stretched.

Rin felt the knot in her stomach begin to unfurl as she watched his body. He was perfect, even with missing an arm. She sat up and beckoned him to her. "Come here," she said,

He crawled to her until he was leaning over her. "Yes, my mistress," he said, licking her neck.

"Make love to me," she said, and he did, softly and with passion. Afterwards he dressed and left her, going in search of some food.

She sighed and threw her legs over the edge of the bed. It wasn't until she tried to stand that she felt the soreness of her body. She wobbled to the balcony and stood looking out over the Western Lands, the ache in the nether regions slowly receding to the background.

She was Lady of all this. The mountains stretched out before her and she could see small columns of smoke coming from villages fires in the distance. She had dreamed—had hoped—to be her Lord's—no wait, Sesshomaru's—mate, but had never thought it would come true, even in her wildest dreams. She was surprised last night when he kissed her, and more surprised when he led her to the bed, but she had resigned herself to the idea of warming his bed and never being his mate; she was utterly his creature as she had told Shippo. If he demanded that she jump off a cliff she would have.

But when he had called her his mate, she was overcome with happiness. He had chosen her, out of everyone on the planet he had chosen her, a human, a being she thought he detested, and she cried. She had frightened him a little, but she couldn't stop the tears. He appeared to be soothed when she smiled, and he had looked at her so tenderly that she almost let loose another wave of tears.

He was now her Sesshomaru. She could imagine Jaken's face when he found out. She giggled.

"What's so funny?" he said, coming up behind her and kissing her softly on the neck.

"Jaken will be disappointed by his drop in rank."

He grunted. "Jaken has always been the lowest on the food chain."

She laughed and turning around, embracing him. "Sesshomaru."

"Hmm?" he said, putting his arm around her.

"Nothing, I just love to say your name."

He took her hand and led her back into the room. "I will make you scream my name."

"I will try not to disappoint you," she said as he covered her body with his.

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R & R.

Not over yet; at least one more chapter. So, wadda you all think?