Put Me Together

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha…I don't own the characters…I don't own the plot…and apparently I don't own my computer either… (looks as my computer is salvaged by the idiots I call my friends)

Chapter 2: To Die By Jokes

Kagome opened her eyes panting. She placed her hand where her rapidly beating heart was located. Pulling the covers off of her she stepped out of the seemingly king sized bed- Wait? How did she get here?

The last thing she remembered was falling asleep while reading Rin a bedtime story. The younger girl fell asleep prior to the finish of the story but Kagome went on interested in the feudal fairytale she had never heard of.

Kagome shrugged it off walking to leave the room suddenly stopping at the carved wooden dresser with a mirror. It showed she was in a silk nightgown. It was purple and flowed down to her ankles. She loved it. It was flawless. Simple yet elegant!

Santurai walked into the room watching as the miko gaped in front of the mirror looking at the gown that Sesshoumaru had informed the maids to dress Kagome in.

"Oha!" The demoness said as Kagome jumped swiftly turning around mid-jump and eeping all the while. Santurai smirked watching Kagome rolled her eyes.

"So…daijoubu?" Santurai asked as Kagome shook her head and the youkai raised her eyebrow. "Well…you see…

Kagome looked around the serene garden before her. There was a pond where the animals gathered and it was a heavily forested area. She lightly giggled at the feeling of the grass grazing against her bare feet. Surrounding her were different types of flowers, all purple.

She particularly picked out a lily bringing it to her nose and inhaling the sweet scent emitting from the flower. The girl looked up at the night sky as a crescent moon lit up the night.

Walking forward she saw a figure standing upon the hilltop. She could see silver hair that danced with the wind as it glistened in the moon taking on a silky appearance.

Continuing her trail she saw the figure had a boa and a white and red kimono on with black ankle boots. The figure turned around to look at her as Kagome gasped.

It was Sesshoumaru. As his warm golden eyes looked at her shining in love and a smile graced his face, the wind blew through Kagome's hair as in a flash he stood before her.

The girl's eyes widened as a blush adorned her face and he placed his two hands around her. "Koi…you look beautiful tonight…" Sesshoumaru said as he pulled her into a kiss as arousal flooded through her body.

…And then I woke up panting and clutching my heart.." Kagome finished as Santurai looked at her, pale before laughing.

Kagome raised an eyebrow as Santurai laughed harder. The demoness fell to the floor on her knees clutching her chest as tears started to streak down her face.

The two didn't notice the other listener who left from the doorstep just a few seconds ago.

Said listener found it highly interesting.

After the few minutes of laughing and whimpering from the demoness, Kagome made a move to ask her why she was laughing as she started to laugh once more.

"You…are a lost cause…" Kagome said walking out of the room. It was time for exploration investigation! Investigator Higurashi, on the case!

Kagome whistled to a tune that she heard on her radio lately. "What goes around, goes around, goes around, comes all the way back around…" She sang in her best Justin Timberlake voice.

Just as that name came into her head, she saw Sesshoumaru walking towards her. Being in the stupor that she stopped her singing midway and looked up shocked, her eyes dilated and her mouth parted.

Sesshoumaru looked at her questioningly. Was the woman feeling alright?

It was as if she were in one of those uber dramatic romance movies. When the heroine stops and turns around, her hair swaying to its rightful position as she stared in front of her. Then you'd see the hero walking in slow motion, hair swaying delicately behind, the warm eyes looking into the heroine's before they would kiss…

Except…it wasn't a movie…

As he stopped in front of her only one thing registered in the girls mind.

Justin… Timberlake…

"I can see us holding hands walking on the beach our toes in the sand…" Kagome sung in her music stupor just as Santurai walked out the room.

The demoness slid down the floor bursting out into laughter as the girl remained in her stupor and Sesshoumaru looked at her, eyes widened about a millimeter.

"I can see us on the country side sitting on the grass; standing side by side…" She continued. Her brain didn't register with her mouth and she finally caught on….

"You can be my baby, let me ma-" She finally snapped out of it staring at Sesshoumaru, as her fear started to rise. Kagome heard the laughter of Santurai as Sesshoumaru looked at the girl… Her eye twitched slightly as she tried to say something to find herself stumbling over her vocal dictionary.

"Onna…"

"I can explain! Um…it was um…ah! It's a tradition in my family to uh…to sing when you're in royal blood's house! I wasn't able to do it earlier, so I sung now!!" Kagome quickly made up stammering along the way.

Sesshoumaru could smell the alter in her scent. She lied…

"You lie-"

"Oh! Look at the time! Jeez, I didn't know it was that late!! Oh my, is that you father? What oh um…sorry Sessho but I uh gotta go now bye!" Kagome said as she ran off darting past the taiyoukai.

He stood staring blankly in front of himself. He had to wonder if this girl was a mental case or something… He looked down to see his general in tears, clutching onto her sides, laughing as if there was no end.

He felt it. The migraines…. Not again…

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Kagome blushed deeply as she sat down in the bathroom too afraid to step foot out. 'That must have been the most embarrassing thing I've ever done!!' She mused to herself.

'But…it was pretty funny…'

The girl started to laugh lightly before her laugh escaladed and was heard throughout the whole castle.

'And the look on his face!!' She thought as she laughed louder.

She heard a knock on the door but elected to ignore it as she clutched her stomach and tear started to fall out of her eyes.

"Um…excuse me miss…are you alright?" A male voice asked from outside the bathroom as the girl continued to laugh.

"What's going on in there?" Santurai asked as she looked over the youkai in front of her. He was one of the recruits and he stood in front of the bathroom in which laughter erupted from.

"Milady, I would think that the person was…constipated or…dying of laughter? Maybe pain makes her laugh?" The recruit questioned as Santurai sent a cold glare at him.

"Gomen!" He said as he ran off. Santurai rolled her eyes and knocked on the door. "If you don't stop, we might have to lock you up and label you retarded…" the demoness said as the laughter grew.

"Kagome, you sound like a bitch who's been too far into her heat…" Santurai tried again as she heard a 'thump' before the laughter continued.

"Ugh, woman, psychopath…will….you …plea…" Santurai got out as she chuckled before laughing. It was contagious!

Kagome heard the laughter from outside and that made her laugh harder.

"Santurai…its…so…" The girl bit out as she even laughed harder if possible. Santurai just laughed all the bit louder before she heard footsteps.

"What's going on?" Sesshoumaru questioned as he looked at the general on the floor. The laughter stopped.

One thing passed through their heads. If the laughter was contagious…

Sesshoumaru. Laughing. Holding his hand to the left of his mouth as he shook with joy and mirth and his face held up high. His eyes closed as tears slowly slid down.

The two both started to laugh once more this time louder than before as Sesshoumaru cringed.

Opting not to question them, Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow as he opened the bathroom door.

Kagome.

The stupid crazy bitch.

If he didn't rescue her, she would probably laugh herself to death.

The two girls looked up at the taiyoukai as their eyes widened. Laughter once more stopped.

The sides of his lips were curved up, not noticeably but you could notice if you stared for a long time.

Sesshoumaru smiled at the thought. Ah yes, the joy of watching someone die before his eyes. And of laughter too…

Haha…ha… testicles…

He noticed as the two were laughing and he rubbed his temples. The migraines…

They attacked once more.

"Silence…" Sesshoumaru said. Usually it would have worked. Whoever he said it two would usually stop talking and look up in pure fear and terror. Not these two.

The girls laughed harder.

"Quiet yourselves…" He tried again as they both pounded on the stone they were on.

"URASAI!"

That did it. Both the girls stopped laughing as they looked up at Sesshoumaru. Pure fear struck through their beings as they saw the angered look on his face.

But something was comical about it to Kagome as she chuckled. The girl crawled over to Santurai and whispered to her.

"Imagine Sesshoumaru pouting with an angry face…in chibi form…"

Santurai looked at Kagome as the two struggled to keep straight faces looking up at the taiyoukai.

"Wipe those stupid idiotic smiles off your faces…" He ordered.

Suddenly, Kagome once more couldn't contain herself as she started once more to laugh.

The demoness glanced over chuckling as she tried to control it noticing how his eyes narrowed. Somehow, she found it all the more funnier as she also started to laugh.

Rin slowly skipped down the hallways as she looked up at Sesshoumaru. She'd yet to notice the laughing girls as Sesshoumaru tried to direct his attention to the girl before him.

"Milord!" Rin said happily smiling up to the tall figure.

Sesshoumaru nodded to signal he was listening.

"Lady Kagome taught me something!!" The girl said happily.

'How to annoy the hell out of a taiyoukai?' Sesshoumaru thought as he resisted the urge to rub his temples once more.

"Did you know that Hamlet died cause he was murdered?" Rin questioned as Sesshoumaru gave her an impassive look.

He stared at her.

And stared..

Hamlet…how did she… The book just came out… how'd…

He glanced back at the girl noticing they stopped laughing.

"Good job Rin!" Kagome praised as Rin finally noticed the two and smiled happily.

"Arigato!" the small child replied.

Sesshoumaru looked on.

He still stared. But this time at Kagome…

Kagome? Was it Kagome? How did she get a book like Hamlet when not even he obtained the book? He was Lord Of the Western lands. A taiyoukai. She was just a miko.. She didn't even live in a castle.

Kagome whispered to Santurai as they both started to laugh once more.

"Now imagine him with his eye twitching and his jaw slacked as he stared and depression loomed over him…chibi form…"

Rin also started to laugh as she fell down. "What's so funny?" The child got out as they all laughed in unison.

God. Sesshoumaru inwardly groaned. This was like his worst nightmare manifesting before him.

Satan's incarnate appearing before him in the form of three girls.

"Kagome, come…" He said as he figured a way to kill two birds with one stone. Ah, he did that once…literally…

The girl stood up laughing as she rested on the wall clutching her sides, her eyes red due to her crying in mirth.

Oh was she going to explain. Everything. How she knew of Hamlet, why she was laughing like a mad woman, even why the hell did she sing that wretch song lyrics to him. It still haunted him now. He shuddered as he pictured verbatim the lyrics.

The image was horrible. Him smiling walking with the wretched miko holding hands. Their eyes glistening in love as they skipped down the path. Oh God, no that was worse than hell.

He tried the next…mistake yet again.

The two staring at each other with stupid big toothy grins on their face as they sat the grass before a beach. "Kagome…" He said in a loving tone as he giggled. "Sesshoumaru…" The girl also said in the same tone giggling. They both pulled into a-

OH GOD NO!

What did he ever do to deserve this?! Why did he even rescue the girl? She could have easily survived on her own with her damn purifying abilities. Wait- Yeah…she'd be explaining to him anyway…

If not, he'd do the same thing he did to that person who killed the person he was trying to kill. Pure torture. Pain. Death. Revival. Repeat. Enjoy. Inwardly he smirked as Kagome nodded and followed him. Revenge is a bitch… A smile slowly crept upon him as his kappa servant Jaken stopped mid step noticing the gesture.

Not good. "Everybody!! Dangers coming!! Be on the alert!!" Jaken squawked as he ran- rather quickly waddled down the hallway as fast as he could. Kagome just raised an eyebrow as her laughter stopped a few moments ago and she looked at the back of Sesshoumaru.

Oh yes…payback. And he didn't even know what for.