A/N: As always, thank you for reviewing/following/favorite the story. I think it's now official that from this chapter on, this story will take an alternative timeline from Bleach#501: "Hear. Fear. Here" because there is something I want to write, but I doubt it would go in the same direction as Kubo-sensei is going to take his manga. Even so, this installment still contains some spoilers up to chapter 501. So there you have it. Please enjoy.
7: Moon, Tea and Fireworks
After the Gotei 13 had claimed their final victory against the Quincy in what was dubbed as the Thousand Years Blood War, though not without a great number of casualties; people were holding feasts all over Soul Society to celebrate said victory and honored all Shinigami whose lives were lost in the war.
Not in the mood or the condition to celebrate, Captain Kuchiki opted to stay home and watch the night sky that would occasionally be brightened up by random fireworks that people lit in order to celebrate. He was too tired both physically and mentally to meet anyone at that point.
If he were to be honest, Byakuya was surprised he survived that war without far worse injuries. The Quincy had been very strong and extremely well organized, and if those alone were not enough, they were also equipped with many deadly tricks. They had been successful at stealing his and three other captains' bankai in their first encounter, forcing the Shinigami to rely on their other skills in their battles.
While Byakuya managed to survive, though very barely; things were so much worse in other parts of Seireitei. Hundreds of Shinigami were killed within mere minutes, and all hopes were almost lost. It seemed to him Soul Society would fall apart within less than an hour, but once again, it was thanks to Kurosaki Ichigo's assistance that they were able to turn the situation around and eventually claimed victory in the war.
Thinking about the Substitute Shinigami, Byakuya believed the teen was invited to stay in Soul Society to celebrate with them as their guest of honor. Unlike Byakuya, Ichigo couldn't come up with any excuse not to join the feast, so Lord Kuchiki suspected the Substitute Shinigami was still out there somewhere in the city, being the focus of all attentions regardless of whether that boy wished for it or not.
Byakuya sighed softly. Despite his claim that he wanted to be home to rest, he was unable to sleep with all the thoughts of the recent battle still haunting him. Therefore, he was sitting there on top of the roof of his bedroom, watching the pale crescent moon while holding a cup of tea between his hands.
Since he had dismissed all the servants so that they could go out to join the feast if they felt like doing so, Byakuya didn't expect to be disturbed by anyone that night. However, his solitude didn't last long before it was interrupted by a certain boy with vibrant orange hair who came jumping across the roof of his house, instead of coming in through the front door like every other time.
Byakuya almost dropped his tea cup when Kurosaki Ichigo suddenly appeared in front of him with a trademark scowl on his face; however, to the nobleman's credit, he managed to hold on to his cup and then set it down on a small table which was placed at his right-hand side where the rest of the tea set was.
"Aren't you supposed to be at the feast, Kurosaki Ichigo?" Byakuya asked.
"I was," Ichigo said, "but now that everyone seems drunk, I think it's okay for me to just escape. To tell you the truth, I'm not used to that level of attention."
Byakuya eyed Ichigo for a moment before he commented, "Could have fooled me."
Ichigo rolled his eyes in response.
"What about you, Byakuya? Why are you sitting on the roof? I thought you didn't join the party because you were injured and needed a rest."
"That was my excuse, yes."
"So you weren't badly injured?" Ichigo asked again, as if to make sure.
"Do I look badly injured?"
Because of the question, Ichigo allowed himself to take yet another careful look at Byakuya from head to toe. Although he could see bandages around the nobleman's forearm and torso, which implied that there were some injuries underneath them; Ichigo had seen Byakuya survive more fatal injuries so he didn't think he should really be worried.
"Not really," Ichigo replied, as relief flashed behind his brown eyes. "To tell you the truth, I kinda freaked out when I heard from Akon-san that your bankai was stolen by the Quincy – well, yours and three other captains', in fact. And it didn't help much to get out of the Garganta and hear that you were already struck down by the enemy at that time. For a moment there, I thought you wouldn't make it, but I guess I shouldn't have been worried, eh?"
Byakuya closed his eyes for a moment. In any other circumstances, his pride as a nobleman and a captain of the Sixth Division would have already commanded him to shoot the concern down. However, Byakuya was still slightly shaken by the battle, and a part of him was touched by Ichigo's genuine concern, so he couldn't find it in him to do so.
"You shouldn't have," Byakuya remarked, "however, I appreciate your concern, and I am sure that everyone else does as well."
Ichigo gave Byakuya a light, sheepish smile in response.
"When I think about how the enemies can steal bankai, it kinda makes me think that I should start learning some other Shinigami's skills, you know," said the Substitute Shinigami, changing the subject slightly. "I mean, I was lucky that they couldn't steal my bankai for some reason, but if they had been able to, I would have had no other means to battle them because Zangetsu is pretty much all I have."
"You know how to shunpo, so I suppose if the worst happened, you could still use that to run away," Byakuya stated lightly. "Then again, you probably do not know how – to run away, I mean."
The Substitute Shinigami rolled his eyes.
"Thanks for thinking so highly of me," Ichigo replied sarcastically. Then, as if he had just realized he had been standing all that time while he was having a conversation with Byakuya who had probably already strained his neck to look up at him, Ichigo asked, "Mind if I sit down?"
"Go ahead," Byakuya replied.
Ichigo didn't need another invitation. He glanced around the huge space on the roof and decided to sit down to Byakuya's left, rather close to the man but still with enough space between them not to invade too much into Byakuya's personal space.
Meanwhile Byakuya turned slightly to his right, and then filled an empty tea cup with hot water from a kettle before he used the water from the cup to refill a teapot that was already filled with some infused tea leaves. After he waited for a moment for the tea leaves to be steeped, Byakuya poured all the tea into that cup then turned back towards Ichigo and offered him the cup of green tea.
"I'm afraid I don't have any confectionery to go with the tea."
"That's okay," Ichigo said as he accepted the tea. His fingers accidentally brushed against Byakuya's as he did. "I know you don't like sweets and you aren't expecting any company tonight."
Byakuya raised his eyebrow slightly when he looked at the teen as if trying to figure out where Ichigo got that information.
"Well, I kinda notice you never ate any of the confectioneries that were served with tea whenever I visited your house," Ichigo answered the question in Byakuya's eyes before he sipped the tea that Byakuya had just brewed. "Am I wrong?"
"No. Your observation is correct," Byakuya replied. He turned to pick up his own tea cup and took a small sip before he asked, "By the way, I don't believe you have said why you're here."
Ichigo was in the middle of lifting his tea cup of to his lips while Byakuya asked his question, so he halted for a moment. It seemed to Byakuya that Ichigo was contemplating what would be his best answer, but then he shrugged, giving Byakuya the impression that he decided just to give him the plain truth.
"To check on you, actually," he admitted. "I mean, I didn't see you at the city hall when most captains showed up there to celebrate, so I got a bit worried, you know, since your bankai got stolen by some Quincy and all."
Ichigo actually looked embarrassed by his own explanation, and the way Byakuya quirked his eyebrow with an amused gleam in his eyes certainly didn't help the matter.
"And if I were not sitting right up here but were resting as I claimed I would be, would you barge into my room just to check?" Byakuya asked, feeling like messing with the younger man's head just a little further.
If Ichigo hadn't already been embarrassed before, he would have been because of that question. There was a faint blush on his face when he replied:
"Er... actually, I didn't plan that much ahead. I'd probably just ask one of your servants if you're okay then I'd head back off, but then I spotted you sitting up here, so I decided to just drop by to say hello."
"Hello, then, Kurosaki Ichigo."
"Hello," Ichigo returned hesitantly, feeling awkward all of a sudden since he had no idea where to lead their conversation from that point on.
Byakuya probably noticed it as well, since he asked, "How was the feast, by the way?"
"It was... what can I say? Crowded?" Ichigo replied with a shrug. Then he furrowed his brows and added, "And strange."
"Strange?" Byakuya prompted.
Ichigo nodded.
"Yeah, you see, at first I was just chatting up with some friends, but then the next minute I was approached by several people who came to either praise me for some heroic actions I was supposed to have done or to thank me for saving their or their relatives' lives or something like that," Ichigo said, cringing slightly at the thought. "It's strange because it's like everyone knows who I am when I don't even know who they are or what I've done for them to thank me. I mean, sure I've helped a bit in the war, but that's it. Surely I don't deserve anyone's gratitude."
Byakuya tilted his head and looked carefully at Ichigo, who was taking yet another sip of tea. For a moment, he wondered if the boy was being humble or he truly had no idea how much he had done for Soul Society in the course of two years that he had become a Substitute Shinigami or how many lives he had touched and changed for the better; then the captain decided it was the latter.
"You don't give yourself enough credit, Kurosaki Ichigo," he observed. "Whether you are aware of it or not; ever since you've become a Substitute Shinigami, you have done many things and touched many people's lives in many different ways. Your influences also helped to shape Soul Society into something better than what it had always been before. If those were not enough to call for gratitude, then you also played a huge part in defeating Aizen Sōsuke and in ending the thousand-year feud with the Quincy. I doubt anyone can say your actions were insignificant."
Ichigo turned to give Byakuya an incredulous look. Regardless how much their relationship had evolved from their first encountered, it seemed the boy still found it difficult to believe that Byakuya could say good things about him.
"Okay, I'm pretty sure what we've been drinking is tea, so what kind of drug did they prescribe for your injuries?" Ichigo asked, earning himself yet another quirk of an eyebrow from Byakuya. "You wouldn't say this to me under a normal circumstance."
"I'm not on any drugs, Kurosaki Ichigo," Lord Kuchiki assured. If he was unhappy with Ichigo's implication, he did not show it through his expression. "I merely spoke from a point of view of a person who is personally indebted to you."
Ichigo deepened his scowl.
"You're not indebted to me in any way, Byakuya."
"Must I really go into details?" the captain wondered. The irritated look behind his slate eyes told Ichigo that he really hoped he wouldn't have to, but should Ichigo truly required further explanation, he would still elaborate.
Ichigo narrowed his eyes. If a look behind his umber eyes was anything to go by, he didn't really want to hear those details any more than Byakuya wished to elaborate them. However, he still felt he needed to know it in order to convince Byakuya that he required no gratitude from the man.
"Yeah, I'm afraid so," Ichigo replied, "because as far as I'm concerned I still haven't done anything that deserves your gratitude – not consciously, at least."
"So we're going to play this game again, aren't we?"
When Ichigo came to think about it, they had been in that same kind of situation before. However, back then it was Ichigo who was trying to explain why he needed to thank Byakuya while the older Shinigami had done a great job at brushing off Ichigo's gratitude. The thought made Ichigo smirk in response.
"I really doubt you have a gift to offer along with your gratitude, but yeah, I guess we are close enough," Ichigo replied lightly.
"You don't know that for sure," Byakuya commented. However, before Ichigo could begin to wonder if Byakuya really had a gift to offer him, the nobleman continued, "So, where should I begin?"
Ichigo gave him a shrug.
"From the start would be nice."
Byakuya took a moment to think before he stated, "In that case, I suppose I should say that you have reintroduced me to my volition."
"Volition?"
Lord Kuchiki nodded slightly before he looked down into the cup of tea he was holding between his hands as he contemplated on how much he should reveal.
"Ever since I was born, everything had been planned out for me. I would follow the family's tradition and become a Shinigami, then at a certain age, I was to wed a noblewoman that the elders had chosen for me, and afterward I would succeed my grandfather's title and become yet another perfect head to the Kuchiki Clan.
"I might not have been the most obedient child you would find in Seireitei, but I never strayed from the path that had been set for me by my elders. After all, I always thought it was the best path that could be set for anyone, since it would only lead to an honorable and secure way of life, and I never felt that I wanted my life to be in any other way. I was always content with the way it was. Then along came Hisana.
"She was just a common girl from Rukongai. She had nothing to compare to the lady who was once my intended whether it was blood wise, brain wise or beauty wise. She was not a part of the plan."
"But you fell in love with her anyway," Ichigo added.
Byakuya nodded.
"For the first time in my life, I truly wanted something for myself. I found out that up until then I was never truly happy with the path that had been written for me. I just never had any reasons to stray from that path before. Therefore, I decided to fight for her. In doing so, I broke several rules of my house, and I had also caused a rift with an influential noble clan. I never regret marrying Hisana. If there were any regrets, it was only that our time was too short. However, it didn't mean that I didn't feel any guilt. After Hisana died and I adopted her sister into my family, I decided to redeem myself to the eyes of my family. I have vowed never to break any more rules regardless of the circumstance. I would follow my orders without questions. I would be a perfect role model of a Shinigami. And for a long time, I had done my best to keep that vow that I became very keen on ignoring the content of my heart to the point that even I forgot I had feelings. The rest, you have already known."
Ichigo nodded and supplied, "You allowed Rukia's execution and even went so far as to announce that you would execute her yourself after the Sōkyoku was destroyed."
Byakuya nodded.
"Then you came and challenged every value I had been holding. For the first time in a long time, I was forced to get in touch with my own feelings, to make a choice. You showed me, through the course of your actions, that rules and orders were not always right, and you made me realize that sometimes it was alright just to follow my own heart for a change. In the end, you didn't just save Rukia from her execution, Kurosaki Ichigo. You have also saved me from myself, and for that alone, I would always be indebted to you."
Ichigo blinked for a couple of times. If anything, he never expected to hear that he had touched Byakuya's life to that extent.
"That was completely unintentional," Ichigo said. "I was just focusing on rescuing Rukia back then."
"I know."
"And if anything, we should have already been even when you and Kenpachi came by to save my ass from Yammy – or when you fought that guy Tsukishima," the Substitute Shinigami added. Then Ichigo narrowed his chocolate eyes as something suddenly dawned to him. "Talking about Tsukishima, is that why you refused to accept my gratitude and hesitated to take my gift – because you did what you did to repay me?"
Byakuya responded with a nod.
"In a way, yes, but I never intended to say anything to you about it."
"Then why did you tell me just now?"
"Honestly? I don't know," Lord Kuchiki admitted. "Perhaps it's because I never had a chance to express my gratitude properly. Anyway, I suppose a proper thank you would involve a gift, but you were right about this, I do not have any present on my person now, so that has to wait."
"Oi, that's okay, Byakuya. you don't need to give me any gift," Ichigo said quickly.
"Are you certain?" Lord Kuchiki asked. "You don't even know what kind of gift I might give you?"
"Yeah, I'm pretty sure about that," Ichigo replied. "Besides, rather than a gift, I'd prefer it more if you'd just call me by my name."
"And when you said your name, you meant Kurosaki or Ichigo?"
Ichigo couldn't hide his surprise when Byakuya shot him with that question, since he expected Byakuya to hesitate rather than to try to confirm whether it was the family name or the given name that Ichigo would prefer to be called.
"Ichigo would be nice. I mean, I always call you Byakuya, so it'd only be fair if you were to-" Ichigo trailed off just before he could finish his own thought. He then gave Byakuya an unsure expression before he bit his lower lip and quickly added, "But Kurosaki is good, too, if you find referring to me by my given name too distasteful, that is."
Byakuya quirked an eyebrow.
"I think it should have already been clear to you by now that I no longer hold you in any contempt."
"It's hard to believe so when you keep referring to me by my full name," Ichigo retorted, hoping that it wouldn't come out like he was complaining.
"It is merely a force of habits," the nobleman claimed, "but if it would make you feel a little better, it's also because I find your name rather fitting to your image – a protector in a black cape."
The Substitute Shinigami blinked as he didn't anticipate hearing that kind of reply. To his credit, Ichigo was quick to collect himself. He even tilted his head and gave Byakuya a smug look.
"Oh? So you want me to believe that you keep calling me by my full name because you like its meaning?"
A hint of a smile flashed behind Byakuya's eyes.
"You can think of it in whichever way you prefer."
There was something about the slight shift in Byakuya's expression and the tone of voice that the nobleman used that made some heat rise up Ichigo's cheeks; however Ichigo disregarded it and narrowed his eyes at his companion.
"You enjoy messing with my head, that's what I think," he pointed.
Byakuya didn't honor that statement with any response. Instead he finished the tea in his cup and turned to his side to set the empty cup onto the table next to the teapot and the kettle.
"Putting that aside, you still haven't told me why you're up here on the roof, Byakuya," Ichigo said, reminding Byakuya of the first question he asked since he arrived to the top of the Kuchiki Mansion.
Since he didn't feel like explaining to Ichigo that he couldn't sleep because he was still haunted by the memories of all horrid images that appeared in his mind after the Quincy's arrow induced irrational fear into his system during their battle, Byakuya decided to give Ichigo a half truth.
"I'm merely having tea while admiring the moon," Byakuya supplied.
The answer made Ichigo tear his eyes from Byakuya and turn his gaze up to the sky before he took a look at the pale crescent moon for the first time in that night. Upon seeing the moon, Ichigo furrowed his brows slightly.
"I thought people only enjoy watching the moon when it's full."
"I don't see why I should limit myself to only watch full moon when each phrase of the moon has a different appeal to it," Byakuya remarked before he, too, turned his eyes to the sky. "Besides, tonight I can also see some fireworks people randomly lit up during the feast."
As if to support Byakuya's point, another firework exploded in the sky from afar.
"Even so, don't you think it's a little lonely to be sitting here watching the moon and those fireworks by yourself when everybody is out there, celebrating the victory together?"
"I'm not exactly by myself now, am I?"
Ichigo chuckled softly. In any other time, Ichigo might have more trouble trying to decipher whether Byakuya said so in order to imply that he wished to be left by himself. However, that night, he had a feeling that Byakuya didn't really mind his company. If anything, the nobleman might have found some comfort in it.
Still, Ichigo knew better than to get ahead of himself and decided to his gaze back to Byakuya and commented softly just to make sure:
"I guess now the question is whether you want to be left alone."
Sensing Ichigo's eyes on him, Byakuya turned to meet the teen's chocolate eyes before he lifted an eyebrow and questioned lightly, "What do you think?"
The corners of Ichigo's lips curved up into a gentle smile before he replied, "I think you could use a company."
"Then stay awhile, Ichigo."
Ichigo's heart skipped a beat. Not only because Byakuya had actually returned his smile and asked him to stay, but also because of the way the nobleman addressed him. He shouldn't have reacted that strongly, since most of his friends called him Ichigo anyway, and Ichigo had more or less requested Byakuya to call him Ichigo himself. However, he still had that strange feeling regardless, since Byakuya had never given him any promise that he would change how he referred to Ichigo before their conversation was led away from the subject, which made Ichigo assume that Byakuya would not change the way he addressed him. He couldn't have expected to hear his name rolled out of the nobleman's lips then, and it caught him off guard.
Perhaps, he was not completely wrong to think that Byakuya enjoyed messing with his head, and perhaps he was not all too displeased by that thought.
"Sure, Byakuya," Ichigo finally replied after a long pause. "It's not like I have anywhere else I want to be right now."