1. I am not to walk up to random women and say… "so when's the baby due?"

2. I am not to bribe the writer's of HSM2 to make Ryan seem more well manly

3. I am not to threaten them to do so

4. Or do it myself

5. I am not to make them put in a girlfriend for Ryan so people can stop calling me gay

6. I am not to rewrite the choreography so I look cooler

7. I am not to complain that Zac or Corbin are never mistaken as gay

8. I am not to hurt people who call me gay

9. I am to stop using the word gay in that term; I must stop talking about my disappointment towards how people foresee Ryan and myself

10. I must never pay Vanessa to accidentally lock Ashley and I in a closet

11. I must not hurt Drew because he's super flirty and dances too close to Ashley

12. I am not to accidentally drop some money near Vanessa after she accidentally locks Ashley and I in a closet

13. I am not to pay, bribe, or in any way do something else in someone else's favor that helps me as well, to get people to do things

14. I must never, ever, ever in a million years cut my hair so much it looks like I'm bald again

15. Because it scares small mammals

16. And girls

17. And Zac

18. I am not to throw up or insult writers of fanfiction that put me in romantic situations with Zac

19. I am not to joke around with Zac saying we should try it

20. I am not to be offended or insulted when Zac thinks I'm serious

21. I should take it as a compliment to my brilliant acting skills

22. I should work on having low self-esteem

23. I am not to give Ashley any more coffee than one cup a day

24. I must give her decaf

25. I am not to prank one of my cast mates

26. Waking them up at 3 AM after we had killer dance rehearsal counts

27. I am not to write fanfiction

28. I am not to read fanfiction

29. I am not to think about fanfiction

30. I must let Kenny block on my laptop, computer, and any other means for going on I can get to

31. I am never to go on fanfiction again, period

32. I am not to laugh when people say the word period

33. I am never to say that a girl may be in her time of month when she's being dramatic and emotional

34. I am not to run away when they try to attack me because I said this

35. I am not to say Zac did it and hide behind him

36. I must admit I was the one who said it

37. I must stop being insensitive to the women I work with

38. Just because I have to be sensitive to them doesn't mean I should start being rude to the other guys

39. I can not be mean to the guys

40. I can not start fights with Zac when we talk about which girl who rules our fanclub is hotter

41. I am not to get angry when Zac says his fan girl is hotter than mine

42. I am not to take Zac's phone and send one of the girls a rude text message from it as payback

43. If I ever think of doing this I must look up there to the rule about pranking people

44. I must now write I will not prank people two-hundred times

45. I am not to ever tell a fan I am hopelessly, and madly in love with them

46. I am not to allow Vanessa to dare me to skinny dip, play poker, gamble, or do anything else idiotic

47. I am not to do things that are idiotic

48. Or immature

49. I am to act my age

50. I may not lie about my age so I can act younger

51. I may not complain that Zac got to be in Vanessa's video and I didn't

52. I am not to go to Zac's house after he says I have a once in a life time chance to make out with Ashley

53. I must save Ashley if she's drowning in the pool

54. We are not to kiss after she is alive again

55. We are not to chase after Kenny who took pictures

56. We are not to bail out Zac after he gets thrown in jail for the idiotic things he did

57. I am not to ever go near Ashley when she's drunk

58. Ashley is never to get drunk

59. No one is allowed to get drunk and as second oldest I must make sure everyone follows the rules

60. Even if I'm drunk as well and forget all about this list

61. I am never to get drunk even though I am of age

62. I must be a good role model for tons of kids who watch Disney

63. I must keep working for Disney

64. I must keep my Disney image intact while I work for Disney

65. I must not quit Disney so I can ditch the stupid golden boy image

66. I am not to gamble with Vanessa

67. I am not to make bets with Corbin about who would get together first in out group

68. I am not to accept money when I'm right

69. I must not leave prank tracks on people I-pods

70. I must stop thinking about pranks

71. I must once again write I will not prank people

72. I may not make jokes after filming when Ashley asks what I want to do?

73. I may not say as an answer to this question, "I'm going to Disney Land"

Oh I remember that it was so funny, Ashley was all, 'okay we just had killer rehearsals, our feet are aching, and we're starving, Luc, what are you going to do? And I was all, 'I'm going to Disney Land', everyone started laughing, ah good times, good times (Kenny walks in and pushes my head to look back towards the stupid paper)

74. Even though if I went to Disney Land everyone would be happy to see me because I'm so dang on fine

75. I am not to call myself 'so dang on fine' again

76. I must leave that to the girls

77. I must stop saying conceded comments

78. I must stop speaking about random things that no one wants to hear about

79. Who I like is one of those things

80. I am not to say that I love Ashley

81. Or Vanessa

82. Or some other random female that comes to mind

83. I am not to fall in love

84. I am not to fall in love with my co-stars

85. I am not to get a girlfriend

86. I am not to get married

87. I must stay single forever that way no annoying paparazzi can make up rumors about me

88. I am not to call the paparazzi the pepperoni

89. Even if it's funny

90. I am not use the word funny because it's an immature word

Funny, funny, funny, funny, funny. What cha gonna do Kenny?

91. I can not mock Kenny

92. I can not mock anyone because it's even more immature

93. If I act too immature, Disney will fire me

Why? Disney is all about being yourself and being a kid and having fun, why can't I do that? (Kenny walks in and points back down at the paper) okay, okay, I'm writing

94. I am not to agree with V when she says we should play strip poker

95. I am not to laugh when certain people can't play for beans

96. I am not to make jokes when people say that can't do something for beans

97. I am not to play poker, or strip poker, or black jack, or any casino type card games

98. I am not to laugh or make suggestive comments when one of the girls uses the word suck

99. I am not to laugh at any random words that have dual meanings (or more than one meaning to those with sick and dirty minds) that people say

100. I am not to rewrite songs and sing them to make everyone laugh

101. I am to sing only HSM songs when on set

102. The hotel we're staying in counts as the set

103. So does the school we use for the first few scenes

104. And the country club

105. And all of Utah

106. I am not complain that they've given me too restrictions

107. Writing down Kenny sucks counts as complaining

Uh, Kenny I got to go erase something (Kenny glares at me)

108. Putting in my blog I'm quitting and never coming back because these losers are driving me insane counts, too

109. Even talking to inanimate objects counts

110. I am not to talk to inanimate objects

111. They are not alive

112. I am never to go on a hunger strike demanding that they make Ryan more manly or I won't eat

113. I am not to hurt Zac when he says I'm becoming anorexic

114. I am not to become anorexic

115. I am not to call others anorexic

116. Even if they are

117. I am not to refer to anorexia as anorexia

Why?

118. I am not to ask why?

Why?

119. If I ask why after they tell me not to, they can take away my sweet snacks privileges

I hate you

120. I am not to say I hate anyone

Okay, I strongly dislike Kenny for making this stupid thing

121. I can not say I strongly dislike them either

Well, that's stupid

122. I am not argue with this list or call it stupid

Okay, it's idiotic and… idiotic

123. I am not to insult the list in any way because it makes me seem insane

124. I am not claim I'm insane

125. I am not go to a mental institution and argue with one of the crazy people

But it's fun and you let Zac do it

126. I can not call them crazy people

127. I can not tape this list to a hat I wore and give it to a fan in hopes of it never coming back

128. I must keep this list forever

129. And forever must mean forever

This list was originally written by Kenny Ortega, directed by Kenny Ortega, and forcibly written by myself, Lucas Stephen Grabeel. It is dedicated to you:

I hope you're happy

I am never to do anything on the list ever again and if I do may Disney fire me and may they give away my part to any other super hot, brilliant singing guy… if they do have to do it, it can not be Drew Seeley. You hear me Disney! No Seeley!

Signed, Lucas Stephen Grabeel, 2007