Chapter 44

Things were tough for the next few days. Edward and I didn't speak about the DNA test again; in fact, we didn't speak about my pregnancy at all. There was a lot of tension between us, but we forced ourselves to put on a united front for Bree's sake, and together, somehow we managed to get her through her mother's funeral. Edward's family briefly asked about my pregnancy after the service, but since Edward was still pissed at them, they weren't that surprised when he refused to answer. I had no idea when or if he planned on telling anyone about the paternity issues with the baby, but I suppose that was his decision to make. I honestly didn't care what anyone else thought about it, I just had to keep hoping something would force Edward to wake up and believe the truth.

"Ready for this?" I overheard Edward asking Bree. With the funeral complete, there was nothing left keeping us in Forks so it was time to move to Seattle.

"I'm excited….but do you think I'll make friends at my new school?" Bree asked nervously.

"Of course you will," Edward said assuredly. "The kids in Seattle would be nuts if they didn't want to play with you."

"My mommy just said the same thing," Bree said happily.

"O-kay," Edward said uncomfortably. "Grab your doll and let's get going."

"Is that everything?" I asked as Edward walked out of the back hall carrying a box. Bree skipped along behind him with two stuffed animals and a doll in her arms.

"Yep. And we really need to get going to beat the traffic. Are you going into work today?" he asked me.

"No, and I'll probably only go in for an hour or so tomorrow. My team is actually really good and I don't have to worry much about anything."

"Bella, can I come to work with you at the bookstore sometime?" Bree asked eagerly.

"Sure thing. On one of your days off school you can come help me stock shelves."

"Really? Will I even get money?"

I laughed. "Definitely, but we'll have to discuss your wages later."

Because we were pulling a moving trailer the trip took longer than expected, and with Bree sleeping most of the way, Edward and I were left in an extended amount of uncomfortable silence. Every once in a while one of us would force a casual conversation, but it was strained and a small part of me wondered if he was regretting the move altogether. I knew he loved me and always would, but that didn't mean he was still certain about us. Perhaps he felt a little trapped; Bree and I already had a bond and I was sure he wouldn't want to disrupt that so soon after her mother's death…but it made me sad to think he possibly didn't want it anymore himself.

"You know, the apartment is three bedrooms, so…if you want, you can stay in the spare," I said hesitantly as we were pulling into my apartment complex parking lot.

Edward turned his head and shot me an unreadable expression, before looking back through the windshield to properly park the car. Of course, that was when Bree woke up, so he didn't have a chance to respond further.

"Can I unlock the door?" Bree asked while jumping out of the car and bouncing around the lawn area.

"Sure, here you go," I said while handing her the keys.

"Bree, do you remember which apartment it is?" Edward asked her.

"Yep," she said confidently, but when she started heading in the wrong directions she paused. "Well, maybe not."

We spent the next few hours unloading and unpacking Edward and Bree's things. Her room was already empty so it was fairly easy to find a place for everything, but because my stuff was already everywhere else, incorporating Edward's things was a bit more difficult. We took out most of my old ratty living room furniture and replaced it with his nicer stuff, but when he unloaded his bedroom set into the guest room my heart sank and I regretted the offer to let him use the room immediately. I didn't want him sleeping down the hall, I wanted him next to me like we had been sleeping at his place – sure, we laid as far apart on the bed as possible, but we were still together.

It had been another extremely long day so we put Bree to bed early, and then I realized just how tired I was, so I went to bed as well. Edward stayed up and watched TV for a bit, but it only upset me even more because I knew I wouldn't be seeing him again until morning. However, a couple hours later, I was shocked and beyond relieved when I felt Edward climbing into my bed beside me. He didn't say anything, or cuddle up to me like I would have liked, but he was there, and that was more than enough for the time being.

We took the next several days to get settled into our new routine. Bree started school, Edward started his new job, and I had to get back into the swing of things at the bookstore. It was an adjustment for both Edward and me to get used to managing our time to get Bree ready every morning, and there were a few days when we were all late. More often than not Bree and I wore matching messy ponytails because I ran out of time to do anything better, we didn't always do her homework correctly, and sometimes fast food was all we could handle - but the three of us were figuring it out, and at the end of the day, we were becoming a real family, and that was a beautiful thing.

As great as it felt to be together, we still had some major issues. Edward and I continued to not talk about the baby, but we also didn't talk about getting married either. It was like we were stuck in some limbo that was ten times more paralyzing then the real limbo Ethereal Edward had been stuck in.

We just couldn't seem to move forward, but at the same time, we were holding onto each other with every last ounce of strength we were capable of. The less romantic we were together, the more anxious Edward seemed to get when we were apart. He began texting me again throughout the day, and when we were home he'd often hover and even absently follow me around the apartment whenever I'd leave the room. If I was in the kitchen, he was sitting at the table, if I was in the master bathroom, he was lying on the bed waiting for me to get out. It wasn't a possessive thing, it was his anxiety and insecurities threatening to overtake him again; we both knew it, but were too afraid to disrupt the family unit we had created by acknowledging it.

Something had to change, but whatever that something was had to be done carefully, and above everything else, we had to stay together to do it.