Part Three of Five

Weeks have passed since double D had passed away, and it still feels all too real for everyone. Kevin would admit he missed going into class and seeing the raven haired teen raise his hand to answer every question. Now, it seems the rest of the class died with him. Kevin had stopped trying in school, and his grades were showing that. The bell rang for fourth period, which meant Kevin had gym. At least he would be occupied.

Kevin ran around the gym with some guys as they played basketball. For once in awhile he managed to laugh and smile, and have a good time. After they played, Kevin went to the locker room to change out of his gym clothes when he overheard some of the players talking.

"Can you guys still believe that kids dead?" Kevin's heart sank. All of a sudden, the image of Edd sitting in the shower came back into Kevin's head. He held back tears and continued getting dressed but abruptly stopped.

"Who cares, man? One less fag on this earth to deal with." A couple snickers elicited from the others and Kevin fumed.

"What the fuck did you just say, Jeff?" Kevin looked over at the guy who called Edd a fag. The guys laughed at Kevin's red face.

"What, Barr? You a fag too?" Without thinking twice, Kevin charged at him and began throwing punches at Jeff.

"Fuck…you…you..piece…of..shit!" He spoke in between punches. The coach ran into the locker rooms after hearing yelling and ripped Kevin off the other teen.

"BARR! GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE! You just found yourself sitting out at Friday's game."

"What?! He fucking started it when-"

"OFFICE BARR!" He screamed. Kevin scoffed and grabbed his bag, heading out to the office.

"Kevin…this is the fourth time you've been here for fighting. This week." Principal Stanley spoke as he rubbed his forehead.

"I know.." Kevin looked down at his hands as he fiddled with the zipper on his jacket.

"Be honest with me Kevin, what's going on?"

Kevin hesitated with his answer, but finally he spoke. "It's Double Dee. Er, Edd.." Principal Stanley nodded.

"You two were friends?" Kevin shook his head.

"No, not really. I mean, I uh wanted to be. But I was too stubborn I guess."

"Okay, what made you attack all of those guys then?"

Kevin squeezed his hands into a fist until his knuckles turned white. "They called Edd a fag." Stanley nodded again and sat back in his chair.

"Look, your a good kid. And I don't want to suspend you, but you've been in countless fights. And you need to take responsibility for your actions." Kevin sighed and nodded.

"How long?"

"A week. You will not be able to attend this weeks football game." Kevin felt as if he would cry again. It was rival week, and he had to miss it because he protected Edd.

"This is bullshit, Mr. Stanley." He sighed. "Sorry..but they honestly started it when they opened their mouths. Why aren't they getting in trouble?!" Stanley stayed silent and Kevin scoffed. "Yeah fuck this." He went out of his office, making sure to slam the door behind him. It was only Monday, and he had to spend the rest of the week at home.

The week couldn't go by any slower. All Kevin found himself doing was sleeping until noon and cleaning. His dad wasn't too pissed at him because he understood his sons anger. So he just told him to make the house spotless. Kevin decided to clean his bedroom last, and it was only thursday.

He made his way up into his room and stared at it blankly for a few minutes.

"Fuck.." He mumbled as he looked at the mess on his floor. He had clothes strewn over his entire floor. He had garbage all around and just shook his head. "How do I even manage this?" He plugged his iPod into a docking station and started playing Crash by Fit for Rivals. 'Guilty pleasure…god that girl's got a slammin' voice.' He smirked and started bobbing his head to the beat of the music while he picked up his clothes.

After about an hour, Kevin seemed content with the way his room looked. He glanced over at his dresser and decided to clear it off and even dust it. 'What the hell is coming over me?' He laughed as he started to clear off everything going from trophies, to notebooks, to even candy. 'Ew..' He continued to clean until he spotted a few envelopes. They were the one's Edd had addressed to himself, Ed, Eddy and his parents. Kevin felt his heart break because he completely forgot about the letters. He ran his finger over the "K" in his name. 'Edd's handwriting was so..pretty.'

Kevin took a deep breath and sat on the edge of his bed, staring at the envelope. He slowly began to open it, careful not to rip the handwriting on the front. He took out the paper with blue ink on it and stared at it, not letting his eyes focus on the words. Kevin quickly put the paper back inside the envelope. 'I'm not ready to read this yet…' He sighed and slid it between his mattress, a safe place no one would touch. He glanced over at the other three envelopes and decided he needed to make amends with the idiots who he treated terribly in the past.

"ED! You shoot with R1 and fight with X! Not the other way around!" Eddy yelled as Ed was shot down for the 15th time. Eddy groaned as 'DEFEATED' came across the screen. "Dammit Ed!" They both snickered.

"Oh c'mon Eddy! Let's play again!" Ed shoved a handful of chips into his mouth and picked up the controller again.

"So we can die again? No thank you." Eddy smirked and sat back against the couch. 'Oh, Eddy! Just play one more game with Ed. You know it'll make him happy.' Eddy could hear Double Dee's voice in the back of his head and it gave him chills. "Alright Ed, we'll play one more."

"YAY!" They started playing their rematch again, but we're interrupted a few minutes later by knocking on Eddy's door. Eddy looked at his phone and it was 10 at night.

"Who the hell?" Eddy stood up and opened the door. "Shovel chin?"

Kevin awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck and smirked. "Yeah, hey."

"The hell do you want?" Eddy gritted his teeth.

"Shut the fuck up, dude. I didn't even want to come here."

"Alright, see ya!" Eddy tried to close the door, but Kevin stopped it with his hand.

"Wait! Eddy, I gotta talk to you dude. It's about…uh..Double Dee." Eddy froze in place and stared at Kevin.

"Why the fuck do you wanna talk to me about my best friend? Get the fuck out of here, shovel chin." Eddy slammed the door in Kevin's face, making Kevin fume. He pounded on the door until Eddy opened back up. "WHAT?!"

Kevin shoved the envelope in Eddy's chest. "What the hell is this?"

"It's from Double Dee.." The color drained from Eddy's face.

"This some kind of joke, man? The fuck is wrong with you!" Eddy shoved Kevin back, making him topple over. Kevin quickly jumped up, making the other two envelopes fall out of his back pocket. Eddy ran over to them and examined the handwriting. There was no doubt in his mind this was Edd's handwriting. "How'd…how did you get these?" Eddy's voice was soft and Kevin actually found himself frowning.

"Let me in and I'll fucking tell you." Eddy walked over to Kevin, offering him a hand to help him up.

And that was all it took. Kevin went inside and explained to Ed and Eddy that he took Edd's books over to him. He told them about the fight between Edd's parents and him, and also the smack.

"Fuck.. I never realized how bad he had it…" Eddy wiped tears from his eyes. Ed was balling like a little child, and it killed Kevin seeing the two like that.

"Neither did I, man." Kevin spoke and swallowed a lump in his throat. "I gave him so much shit, and I can't even think of a good enough reason to why I did it. I feel absolutely terrible that I had a part in his…" Kevin got himself choked up and he had to look away.

"Why do you think you had something to do with it Kevin?" Ed spoke softly.

"Are you kidding me!?" He snapped, making Ed jump. "C'mon man, I treated him like shit. And he mentioned bullying and being called dork and dweeb in his suicide note. That's….that shit is all on me." Kevin wiped a few stray tears from his face.

Eddy stared at the letter in his hand, not wanting to read it. But he knew he had to.

"Dearest Eddy,

What you did to me, and what you made Ed do, was absolutely unforgivable. I feel no need to express my thoughts further into this, as you know what you did was wrong. How dare you take advantage of my knowledge of weakness throughout all of these years. How foolish of me to go along with it! Even though I regret ever being your friend in the first place, I do not regret a single moment. You have been there for me as a friend, and a mentor in your own way, and I have been very thankful for that. I know that I am no longer here, and know that I am truly sorry for putting you through this pain. Stay strong throughout your life, and don't get into too much trouble.

Sincerely,

Eddward."

By the time Eddy finished reading his letter out loud, he was in tears. He knew he had something to do with Edd's demise, even though he didn't state it in the letter. Curiosity got the best of Kevin.

"What the hell did you do to him, Eddy?" Eddy stuttered and put his head down in shame. "Fucking tell me, dude!"

"I was the one who told everyone Dee was gay, alright?!" Kevin felt his face flush and anger built inside of him. "Ed caught him kissing some guy numerous times at the park. And we just made a plan to get some money out of-"

"WOAH, you tried to make money of your best friends love life? The fuck is wrong with you!?" Kevin stood up, utterly disgusted at what he was hearing. But he thought to himself, 'Edd was actually gay..?'

"You two were the reasons he was constantly being pushed around for being gay!" Kevin started to yell louder. Eddy stood up, not nearly as tall as Kevin, but he got right in Kevin's face.

"Like you didn't push him around for being a fag, shovel chin!" Kevin didn't want to do something he regretted so he headed out of Eddy's house.

"For the record dick, I had no idea he was gay. And another thing!" Kevin hadn't realize what he was saying until it was too late. "I liked him!" Kevin's face flushed and he took off to his house, leaving the letter for Ed at Eddy's house. He still had Edd's parents letter to deliver. He knew his parents weren't home, so he just slid it into the mailbox, and headed back home.

He walked inside and headed straight to his bedroom. Kevin slammed the door and threw his jacket across the room. He threw off his shoes and fell back on his bed, tears stinging his cheeks. He couldn't help but cry. Kevin knew for a fact he had a lot to do with Edd's suicide. He couldn't believe how heartless and carefree he had been toward Edd's feelings. Kevin felt as if he was the only one this distraught over Edd. He knew he wasn't, but that thought was just in his head.

Once he calmed down, Kevin reached his hand between his mattress, pulling out the letter from Edd. He held it in his hands and sighed, putting it back where it was before. He still wasn't ready to read it, and he didn't know if he'd ever be. Kevin sat up and looked at his window, and a light went off in his head. Quietly, Kevin got dressed again, grabbed a small flashlight, and he walked down his stairs being careful not to make any sound. He quickly made it over to Edd's front door and turned the handle. Of course, it was locked. 'Shit..' Kevin groaned a little and looked over to his right. 'Edd's window…It must be unlocked.'

Kevin climbed up the tree next to Edd's window and leaned closer to the window. Using all his strength, he popped the screen out of the window and slid the window up easily. He took the flashlight and shined it inside, it still looked the same as before. His parents haven't bothered to box any of his things up. Kevin carefully placed one foot on the window sill and pulled himself through the window, quietly stepping off of it. He moved quickly around Edd's room, looking at everything. He smiled when he saw Edd's cactus, Jim. 'That dork always talked about that thing with the Ed's..' He smiled, remembering a conversation he had overheard once before.

"Eddy! It's perfectly normal to have a plant with a name!" Edd pleaded, crossing his arms.

"Yeah, but your plant is a cactus. Named Jim." Ed and Eddy snickered, making Edd smirk a little.

"There's still nothing wrong with it!" He chased after the other two Ed's.

Kevin smiled and shook his head, putting the small cactus back down. Kevin glanced around Edd's room for anything he could find. He came to Edd's dresser, debating to go through it or not. Kevin made his decision and opened the drawer and he searched through it. For anything that he could have a memory of Edd. And EUREKA. He found Edd's trademark beanie. He smiled and shoved the hat into his back pocket. Quickly, Kevin got out of Edd's room, making sure to put the screen back into place after he closed the window. He made his way down the tree and ran to his house, hoping he was undetected.

When Kevin made it up to his room, he quickly took off his shoes and jacket and removed the beanie from his back pocket. He collapsed onto his bed and held Edd's hat in his hands. The most memorable thing about Double Dee, and he held it in his hands. He pressed the hat against his chest and fell asleep with tears falling from his emerald eyes.