Chapter 6

Ally's POV

"Cassidy" Austin said. So this is the famous Cassidy. I wouldn't blame Austin for still loving her, she is gorgeous.

"Austin!" Cassidy came running in and hugged Austin. To my surprise, Austin hugged her back.

"I missed you so much Austin!"

I don't need to stay here longer and get my heart ripped out.

"I-I better get going." I choked out.

"Oh you must be the nanny! And I suppose that you know the real story. I just wanna thank you for taking care of my daughter." She smiled.

"Sir, if you don't mind can I take the day off, I am not feeling so good." I said. I could feel the tears forming in my eyes, but I had to be strong. Austin was about to say something but Cassidy beat him to it.

"Sure thing. It would give me time to catch up. I'll see you tomorrow Ally!" with that I was out of the house.

When I got home, I let my tears come out of my eyes. In just few moments, my life was ruined. Falling for that rock star was the worst thing I ever did.

Everything I ever loved was either taken away, lost or dead. My parents, my baby, and now Austin. You know what, I can't take this anymore. I promised myself I wouldn't do this but….. I can't. My heart can't take so much….

I went to the bathroom and opened the closet and take out a sharp blade. I promised myself that I would never cut myself again, but the pain is too much for me. The last time I did this was when I lost my child. The pain was unbearable. I brought the blade to my wrist and let it slide. Blood came rushing out. At first I felt a little pain, but as the blood came out, I could feel all my misery flow with it. I closed my eyes and made another cut on my wrist. I stopped after 5 cuts, but sat there for a while.

At first I thought that this whole magazine thing was a misunderstanding, but when Cassidy showed up, and Austin hugged her back…. It became crystal clear that Austin still loved her and I was just "The heat of the moment." GOSH! COULD I BE MORE STUPID!

*the next morning*

The door was open so I just came inside. Cassidy was trying her best to quiet down Aria, but Aria kept on crying. Funny, I always thought mothers could make their child stop crying, well I guess I was wrong.

"Oh thank goodness you're here, Sally, she wont stop crying. I tried everything!" Cassidy cried. I wanted to roll my eyes so bad.

"First of all, its Ally, and second of all, did you try feeding her?"

"Feeding her? No I thought she only drank milk."

REALLY! How is she even carrying a child properly.

"She's one. She can eat stuff, she has teeth!" I told her.

"oh.. oh Ally could you be a dear and feed her, I have to get ready. She woke me up so early and didn't let me change." With that she handed a crying Aria to me and went upstairs. As soon as Aria realized that it was me holding her, her crying faded and pointed towards the kitchen. She is a smart baby. After feeding Aria I played with her for a while. I would convince her to say a few words. I would let her crawl and catch me. Sometimes I even tried to make her walk but she would just keep standing in her place.

Austin finally woke up and came down. I just ignored him and played with Aria.

"G-Good Morning Ally!" Austin greeted me.

"Good Morning sir!" I, being a good employee greeted my boss.

"Cumon, Ally-" Austin was cut off by Cassidy.

"Hey babe, I am off for an interview. A magazine wants to interview me on how I forgave you and decided to come back and raise Aria, since according to me the baby should not suffer." Oh my god, could she get any lower. She smiled and kissed Austin's cheek. She came towards me (I was holding Aria). "Cumon Aria, give Mommy a kiss!" Aria just shook her head and rested it on my shoulder. Cassidy made a face and just walked out of the house.

Before Austin could say anything I said "Um Aria's a bit sleepy, I should probably take her to bed." With that I went upstairs. I could hear Austin yell "Ally wait!" but I ignored him. I sat Aria down in her crib and began to find her bottle.

"Mama!" I heard a sweet little voice behind me. I turned around to see Aria staring at me and smiling. I have heard Aria say a lot of words like "sleepy" "Daddy" etc, but never "Mama".

"Mama, sleepy!" She yawned. Oh no. She was calling me Mama.

"Aria sweety, I am not your Mama, no matter how much I want to be." I kissed her fore head and picked her up and started to rock her. Once she was asleep, I took of my jacket revealing my sleeve less red shirt, since it was getting hot. Just then Austin came in.

"She's asleep?"

"Yeah."

"Look Ally, we need to talk!'' Austin said as he approached me.

"There is nothing to talk about Austin." I started to tear up. "I know Cassidy is your first love and no matter what she did she still was your first love and the mother of your daughter. I get it, what happened between us was just, "Heat of the moment." I was just a nanny to you…. Its not your fault that I fel…" I stopped my self. I couldn't tell him that I fell for him. He would just laugh at me.

"That you what?" he asked.

"nothing, it doesn't matter." I said as I whipped my tears.

"Ally WHAT IS THAT!" Austin grabbed my hand and examined the cut marks. SHOOT! I totally forgot about them. But why does he care. He acts like he cares when we are alone"

"Why do you care. Im just your daughter's nanny." I shouted.

"ALLY WHY DID YOU CUT YOURSELF !?" He shouted. Now it was my turn to blow up.

"BECAUSE MY HEART CANT TAKE THE PAIN AUSTIN! AND THIS ISNT THE FIRST TIME I DID THIS TO MYSELF SO YOU DON'T NEED TO wORRY!" I stormed out of the room. I am surprised that Aria didn't wake up from all this yelling.

I went downstairs, sat on the couch and calmed myself down. Austin then came down and handed me a piece of paper and sat beside me. I started to read it… it was a song (AN: I don't knw which song to use so just imagine any song k!).

While I was reading the song, Austin carefully grabbed my wrist and started to kiss my cuts. I wanted to stop him but I was too busy reading the song. It was beautiful. Austin didn't stop at my final cut and kept on kissing my hand until he reached my neck. (AN I read a story called dear Ally, and this little scene was in that story! AnD I LOVED IT!So credit goes to that writer!) I dropped the song and closed my eyes. His lips against my skin felt great. He came to my ear and kissed it softly and whispered my name. I could feel my body heat up. I started to breath heavily as Austin picked me up and put me on his lap. My back was pressed against Austin's chest. He moved my hair to one side and started kiss the back of my neck.

Once I realized what was going on, I shot up from his lap. "Austin this cant keep happening. You cant just lead me on like this and stay with Cassidy."

"Ally I don't want to stay with Cassidy, I want you!"
"Oh really, because if that was the case than Cassidy should have left by now."

"Ally, its complicated. You know I don't like Cassidy. I like you, and I know you like me too. Don't deny it Ally." Austin stood up and and grabbed my hands. I looked up into his big brown eyes and got lost in them. The next thing I knew, we were leaning in, but i quickly came back to reality and moved away.

"Austin even if that is true, I cant forget what you said in the magazine. If what you say is true and you really do like me, than the only explanation is that you are embarrassed of me."

Before Austin could answer Cassidy came in and shouted "IM HOME!" I quickly ran upstairs and into Aria's room. I put on my jacket and applied some face powder to hide the tear stains.

Austin is making it so hard not to fall for him. Even if it is all true and he likes me, I can't forget what he said in the magazine and the fact that Cassidy is living with him and he is okay with that.

GOSH! MY LIFE IS HELL!

A crappy chapter if you ask me! BUT THANK YOU SOO MUCH FOR THE REVIEWSS! WOW! I AM SPEECHLESS!

Tell me what do u think of this one! PLEASE REVIEW! Oh an plz forgive the mistakes!

Shiza.