I wanted to address something- I got a guest review, saying this story is moving a little too fast. I just wanted to say, that I've got a plan! The first chapter did cut to the chase, but the story will move much slower, from the end of this chapter, onward. Just wanted to clear that up! Enjoy this chapter!
It's as if everyone's stares burn his skin. He can't do this…not right now. He's way too overwhelmed, and he does the only thing he can think of at that very second.
Run.
Logan runs out of the studio, away from their stares, away from the harsh eyes of Griffin, away from everything. He hates the world so much right now. He knows he's about to panic, so he runs straight out of Rocque Records, heading for the back of the building.
His thinking place.
He hears shouts and cries from his best friends, but he ignores every one of them. He's about to break, and he has never let anyone see him like this. All he knows is, he can't take it anymore. He's not thinking straight, no matter how much he forces himself to try and remember something. It's like his mind is completely blank, a thick fog. Finally, he reaches his destination and sits with his back against the wall.
Griffin's words slammed into him like a ton of bricks. Fat? He's always been insecure about himself, and his self-esteem has always been lower than Kendall's, James', or Carlos'. He's the most cautious, the most indecisive, he could go on forever. And Gustavo and Kelly and Kendall and James and Carlos and Griffin's two employees all heard him say those venomous words. You're fatter than the other three. You're fatter than the other three. I'd advise you to drop a few pounds so you'll be as popular as Kendall, James, and Carlos.
He doesn't even realize it, but tears are leaking out of his eyes and falling down his cheeks. He didn't even know he was crying. Another reason he's weak. Crying for every damn thing.
"Logie?" A voice invades his ears, and Logan jumps, startled. He wipes his face with his shirt quickly, trying to hide any evidence that he's been crying, before his friends come over.
However, only James emerges from the shadows, a look of warmth and sympathy on his face. Dammit. He doesn't need sympathy. He doesn't need anyone to sugarcoat anything. Sympathy will just make him feel better and continue disappointing fans. He's fat. Weight loss needs to become his primary goal.
"Hey Logie," James says, sitting next to him. "Griffin's wrong. He's an asshole, buddy. But, how're you holdin' up?"
"Fine," Logan replies tightly. He's doing his best to put on a strong demeanor, and not let James find out that inwardly, he's completely breaking.
"No. You're not fine, Logan. Griffin's words got to you, I can tell. You may be trying to hide it as much as possible, but I can see through your mask. It's okay to break, Logie. You need it once in a while. No one else has to know."
And that's all it takes.
Logan buries his head in his hands, as the waterworks begin again. James' words really hit him hard, and he honestly feels like he's breaking. His resolve is crumbling, and he can't control anything anymore. He's breaking down, right in front of James. He hates himself for it, the fact that he's too weak to wait until he's alone to cry. But, there's nothing he can do. Everything just…got to him, and now, he's lost control.
"Oh, Logie…c'mere," James whispers, pulling Logan into his arms. The shorter brunette almost cries in relief at that. James' comforting hold is all anyone needs to feel safe. So, he just cries into the older boy's chest, letting James hold him.
Sighing, James tightens his arms around his brother, rubbing his back gently. He hates the fact that Logan has to go through this. Ever since they came to LA, he's been berated by Gustavo and Griffin. Hell, he was the predicted member to get kicked off the show, if that had actually happened. James knows his brother is hurting, and he's hurting badly.
"Let it all out, bro. I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere," he murmurs, as Logan shakes and trembles against him. He feels his shirt slowly soaking with Logan's tears, but that doesn't matter. What does matter, is that Logan's okay. After all, he was just told a bunch of lies that he probably believes. Just because Griffin is their CEO, he isn't always right. Logan is not fat. If anything, he's thin. Very thin. He watches what he eats, and though he doesn't exercise, that much outside of dance rehearsals, he doesn't consume all kinds of junk food.
Kendall and Carlos are back at the studio, yelling at Griffin for what he said. As soon as Logan ran out, the three of them pretty much raged at their CEO. However, one of them had to go find the brunette and make sure he was okay. James decided to come, because Logan opens up to him the most.
He feels his brother hiccup, before letting out one last whimper, and lifting his head. James smiles gently at him, taking instant notice of how horrible he looks. His face is red from crying, a contrast to his pale skin, his cheeks are wet with tears, and his eyes are glassy, shining with unshed tears. He's shivering, and his chocolate brown eyes are cast downward.
"You okay now?" James asks, wiping Logan's cheeks with his thumb.
"Yeah, thanks…" Logan replies, still not making eye contact.
"You can always come to me if you're hurting, Logie. I'll always listen. And please remember, you're not at all fat. You're perfect, just the way you are, and we all love you."
James pulls him up, and smiles again. Sighing, Logan turns toward the path that'll lead them back to the front of the studio. He really needed to break down, but he's ashamed that he couldn't wait until he was alone.
"C'mon, let's go home," James says.
He can't. His legs refuse to move. He's way too embarrassed to face Kendall and Carlos. He's breaking inside again, and the short brunette collapses into James' chest.
"I'm gonna faint…" He mutters. It wasn't a lie; he does feel like passing out. His legs feel like jello, and he's really tired.
"Let's get you home," James says, pulling Logan off of him, before snaking an arm behind his back, and behind his knees. In one motion, he lifts Logan into the arms.
Logan catches a grunt, as James lifts him. His heart sinks. That must prove he's overweight. Usually, James has no problem carrying him. After all, the muscular guy is able to lift Kendall, who's almost as tall as him.
Bottom line: Logan Mitchell is a fatass that needs to lose weight, before he loses friends.
For now, he's too upset to care about that. He just buries his face in James' chest, whimpering softly, as the brunette carries him out front.
James finally reaches their car, Kendall and Carlos already there. Both of them give him questioning glances, and he sighs.
"He's fine, just not feeling his best. Leave him alone, he's pretty embarrassed about it," James says, as Carlos opens the backseat door for him. He gives the Latino a grateful smile, before placing Logan in the seat, sitting him upright. After he's sure Logan's comfortable, he gets in next to him.
"You okay, Loges?" Kendall says from the driver's seat, turning around to look at the small boy. "We're off for the next week, courtesy of Kelly. Everything's good, Logie."
"Fine, and thanks," Logan says in a monotone.
The drive back to the Palm Woods is silent. Logan's staring out the window, a blank expression on his face, and it's worrying James. It doesn't look as if Logan's convinced that he's not overweight. He still looks pretty upset about it, and James' blood boils. Damn Griffin. As if Logan's self-esteem wasn't already small, it's been ripped away now. There's none left, just an empty, broken shell of their brother.
And James can't take it.
Logan stares at the ceiling, as silent tears stream down his cheeks. He locked himself in the room he shares with James, as soon as they got home, not wanting to communicate with anyone.
"Weight loss…how do I do this?" He mutters, sitting up. Crying like a baby won't help that much, but maybe the Internet will.
He grabs his laptop, and searches dieting. A slew of websites come up, all about different healthy diets. That'll take forever. Those diets predict results in months. He doesn't have that long. He needs to lose weight, and fast.
Suddenly, it comes to him.
Not eating.
If he stops eating, and just barely eats enough to survive, he should lose weight, right? After all, eating like a pig was what got him this far. Just a few adjustments, and he'll be good to go.
It can't hurt, can it?
So, did you guys like the Jagan? It was just bromance, no slash, I don't write slash. xD Anyways, review!
XO ~Neha
