I keep tossing and turning in bed. I can't sleep. Santana's words you can do better than Sara keep repeating in my head over and over. What does she mean by that? Does she know something that I don't know? But if Santana knows something she would tell me wouldn't she? My women's intuition keeps telling Sara is hiding something but I don't want to believe it. I toss one more time before deciding I can't take it anymore. I need to talk to Santana. I reach over and grab my cell phone and dial Santana's number. It rings and rings and rings until finally she answers.

"Hello?" Her voice is a little groggy which makes me smile because it sounds really cute.

"Santana"

"Rachel?" I hear Santana's voice turn from groggy to panicky within seconds. "What happened, you alright, where are you?"

"I'm fine. I'm at home. I just needed to talk. I can't sleep" I hear a groan and then some shuffling.

"You do know it's like one something in morning right? Why didn't you just call your girlfriend and bug her" I roll my eyes. Santana is such a grouch when she first wakes up.

"Why did you say I could do better than Sara?" I ask getting right to the chase before she decides to hang up on me which I'm expecting her to do.

"You called to ask me why I think you can do better"

"Yes"

"You're kidding right? Please tell me you didn't wake me up for something that I could have explained to you in the morning"

"I...I just want to know" I hear Santana sigh.

"I said it because you can. Now can I go back to sleep?"

"But what does that mean? Is there something you know that I don't?"

"Do you really want to have this conversation right now?"

"I…" I hesitate.

"Good. Now go to sleep and we can talk tomorrow"

"But"

"But what Berry? Look I'll come over after Glee and we can talk. Now go to bed because I swear if I don't get some sleep I'm kicking your ass tomorrow"

"Language" I tell her and I just hear the phone click. I try going to sleep but I can't and there's no way I can wait till tomorrow afternoon to talk. Santana knows something and I need to know what it is now. I quickly redial Santana's number and within a few seconds she answers.

"What?!"

"I can't wait till tomorrow. I need to know now"

"You're killing me Berry"

"Please" I beg desperately.

"Fine, let's talk. It's not like I like sleeping or anything"

"Why did you say I could do better than Sara?" I ask her once again. "What do you know?"

"I know a lot of things. Sara's not sweet and innocent like you think she is" I roll my eyes. I knew Sara wasn't innocent. I am her girlfriend after all. I know her better than anyone.

"Has she been cheating on me?" I ask straight out.

"Cheating?" Santana sounds confused like she knows nothing about it. "I don't know Rach, that's something you have to ask Sara"

"Santana please, if you know anything just tell me"

"I told you I don't know"

"Well if she's not cheating then why do you think I can do better?"

"I didn't say she was or wasn't. I honestly don't know but what I do know is that she's been keeping something from you"

"Keeping something from me?" What could Sara be keeping from me? We always tell each other everything.

"Yes, but in order to explain everything I have to take you back to where it started. The very beginning, so again do you want to do this now or wait till tomorrow?"

"I want to know now" I tell her and I hear her take a deep breath and exhale loudly.

"Alright then, first grade"

"First grade?" I say a little surprised. I didn't think she was going back that far.

"I told you I was going back from the very beginning. Do you want to hear it or not"

"Yes I do I just didn't think we were going back that far. I'm sorry continue"

"First grade, whenever you left our side Sara and I used to fight about you"

"I know that already. You told me"

"Will you zip it I wasn't finished"

"Sorry"

"Anyways, yes we would fight about you. She would always tell me that she was going to end up marrying you and there was nothing I can do about it" I hear Santana huff. "There was one day in particularly I remember. You went to go get water and Sara kept running her mouth about how I was too ugly to make other friends and you felt bad so that's the only reason why you would talk to me. Then she told me you really didn't like me and if I would disappear you wouldn't care. God she was so annoying. Any way she pushed me out of nowhere but of course no one saw her and when I pushed her back she fell to the ground and of course the teacher saw me and sent me straight to the office"

"I remember that day. Sara said you were being mean and pushed her for no reason"

"Of course she did. You were so mad at me for doing that. You told me I had to apologize or else you wouldn't talk to me anymore. So of course I did all while Sara was smiling behind your back"

"We were kids then. None of us knew better. You can't tell me I can do better based on things Sara did as a child"

"There's also another thing you don't know. Something she's kept from you for about let's see eleven years now" Santana continues to say. "Remember the summer I told you I was moving away? Well I didn't move away. I ended up just moving one city over"

"You didn't move away?" I asked a little confused.

"No. I misunderstood my mom. I heard her yelling at my dad that we were moving far away from him and that's why I told you guys I wasn't coming back. But we didn't go far. I guess when parents are mad at each other and in the middle of getting a divorce they over exaggerate things. I wanted to call and tell you guys but I couldn't. We were so busy with moving and our phone wasn't getting turned on right away so after the first week of school I asked my mom to take me to Sara's house. That's where we would always hang out on Saturdays and I wanted to see you and tell you I didn't move far but when I got to her house she told me you moved away"

"She did what?" I yell in the phone. "I can't believe she would tell you that. She knew I was sad that you left"

"I didn't want to believe her. I figured she was lying. So when my mom came back to get me I asked if we could pass by your house but…it was empty"

"My dads and I were moving into a new house that weekend. It was a spur of the moment kind of thing" I say softly in the phone and I hear Santana sigh.

"After second grade is when I moved out here. My mom got a job offer and I was given the option of staying with my dad or coming out here with my mom and since I thought you were gone I really didn't want to stay in that town anymore. I did call Sara a few times though in third, fourth and fifth grade to asked her if she's heard from you but she always told me no"

"I didn't know you did that" I say a little sad.

"I didn't expect you to know. I eventually stopped calling Sara and I...I gave up. I was starting to accept the fact that I would never see you again" I can hear the disappointment in Santana's voice and I frown.

"I asked about you" I tell her suddenly. "But Sara always told me to forget about you because you were never coming back"

"I don't doubt that"

"I'm sorry"

"Don't be. So... then came freshman year" Santana continues. "McKinley was playing West Hill in football do you remember?" I try thinking back. I know Sara dragged me to a few football games but I can't remember us ever playing McKinley. "It's fine if you don't but Sara and I bumped into each other that night, like literally bumped into each other. I was about to tell her something when I saw you in the distance. I took a step forward but then Coach Sue yelled for me. I told Sara to wait after the game for me by the snack bar. I practically begged her. So after the game I rushed to the snack bar and waited for as long as I could. Brittany had to physically drag me to the bus because I didn't want to leave. I was so mad that Sara didn't tell you I was there. I even called her house when I got home but her mom said it was best to never call the house again and to leave her daughter alone or she'll call the cops"

"Her mom said that?"

"Yeah, I don't know what Sara was telling her about me but I never called the house ever again"

"I'm so sorry Santana. Sara's never once mentioned to me that she's ever seen you"

"Don't be sorry. I wanted to go back up to West Hill to find you but with the Cheerios and glee I was just too busy and could. So I gave up again but then this year happened. When I saw you and all your slushie glory in the bathroom I froze. I couldn't believe you were here" I hear her laugh which makes me laugh in return. "I was a little hurt that you didn't remember me right away but I guess that happens when you haven't seen someone in eleven years"

"I feel like an idiot. I asked Kurt who you girls were and he told me all your names. I should have put Ana and Santana together and realized it was you sooner. I'm sorry"

"Will you stop saying sorry already. It's fine. I mean I've sort of changed a bit since first grade"

"So have I"

"You haven't changed much Rach, you're still that adorable little girl from first grade" I start blushing and I'm so glad we are on the phone so she doesn't see me do it.

"Why didn't you just tell me everything when we were in class that day?"

"On the first day of seeing you, you wanted me to tell you that your girlfriend is an evil bitch?" I let out a small chuckle. "I couldn't do that and besides you would have thought I was lying and then been upset with me for it" And just like that it hits me. Sara knew. This whole time she knew. When I called her on the phone to tell her about seeing Santana for the first time she acted like she hasn't seen or heard from Santana in a really long time.

"She knew"

"Who knew what?"

"Sara. When I told her I saw you at school she acted surprised and when we all hung out she acted…wait" I finally realized something. "You both acted like you hadn't seen each other. You both have been hiding this from me"

"I didn't want too. I wanted to tell you from the beginning"

"Then why didn't you?" I say a little upset.

"I told you, you wouldn't have believed me if I did" I hear Santana sigh. "That's why I wanted to talk to Sara. You remember when I did, the day after Puck's party? I told her you deserve to know the truth. That us pretending that the past didn't happen is wrong. She kept running her mouth like always. Something's never change but she told me that you'd never believe anything that came out of my mouth and that even if you did you'd be really mad at me for keeping it from you but you know what? That's fine. You already seem mad so be mad at me but I can't keep hiding this from you. I won't hide this from you anymore. You deserve to know the truth" It's my turn to sigh. I don't know what to say. I want to believe what Santana is telling me because in a way it all makes sense. But Sara, why would Sara do all this?

"Santana" I say with a sigh. "I want to believe. I mean everything you've told me makes sense but..."

"But what? Everything I told you is the truth"

"As much as I'm upset with Sara for keeping you away from me I still don't see how I can do better"

"WHAT?" I hear Santana practically yell in the phone. "Because keeping your best friend away from you for eleven years isn't wrong?"

"I didn't say it wasn't"

"Then what about ditching you to go to a party?"

"She knew I didn't like parties and she apologized for that"

"God love really is blind isn't it?"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means your girlfriend is nothing but a lying, selfish, cheating person but you can't see all that" My heart drops.

"You told me she wasn't cheating" I tell Santana and I hear her sigh.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't have said that. I don't know if she is I told you that but you mentioned it so you must think she is?" I shrug my shoulders and realize Santana can't see me.

"I don't know"

"And yet you still can't see how you can do better?"

"I don't have proof other my women's intuition" I tell her honestly.

"Sometimes a women's intuition is all she needs" I stay quiet for a bit before remembering a few things I don't have answers for that could possible help find out if Sara is cheating.

"The text" I begin to say. "The one Sara sent me about needing to tell me something, do you remember that?"

"Yeah I do"

"What did it say?"

"You really want to know?"

"Yes"

"Okay I'll tell you. The text said that...that I like you and to stay away from me because Sara doesn't trust me which is a bunch of crap because I would never force myself on you Rachel. I would never do anything that made you feel uncomfortable or do something that would intentionally ruin your relationship. That's not me"

"Santana"

"No wait. I'm sorry if I made you feel pressured into kissing me the other night. I didn't mean too I was drinking and I guess my feelings got the best of me. It will never happen again. But you can't say you didn't feel something when we kissed, you can't deny that"

"I…" I struggle to say.

"Don't. I don't want to hear a lame excuse or a lie so don't say anything at all"

"I'm really confused"

"I'm sure you are" We go silent again.

"I didn't feel pressured and I did feel something" I finally say. It's soft and low. I'm not even sure Santana heard me but that small puff of air that I hear on the other end lets me know she did and that she's smiling. I know I can't see her but she defiantly has a smile on her face. "I love Sara though Santana"

"I know you do"

"I'm confused. This has never happened to me before"

"Like I said I would never do anything you didn't want to do or force you into anything just for my own selfish reasons. I'm more than happy to be just your friend if that's what you really want. I don't want to confuse you anymore than you already are. If you think Sara is the one and will make you happy then be with her but you can do better. I'm not saying I'm perfect and can give you a perfect fairytale but I know for a fact I would never do anything to hurt you" I don't what to say. I really don't know what to do. I am confused on so many levels. I love Sara and I thought she and I would be together forever but then Santana comes along and I don't know. "Oh and Rach"

"Yeah"

"I didn't do anything with Puck. He and I might have a past and fight a lot but when I need to have a serious talk he's my go to guy. The whole coming out of the closet fixing ourselves was his idea. He thought it would help get you to admit that something did happen between us. I don't know why I went along with it because when I saw the look in your eyes I swear I wanted to die. I'm sorry for that but we didn't do anything" A big wave of relief washes over me. I know I shouldn't feel relieved because Santana can do whatever she wants but I'm glad nothing happened. "Night Rachel"

"Goodnight Santana"