Lanie Parish's Wedding Toast
By
UCSBdad
Disclaimer: It's mine, all mine, I tell you! Okay, I lied. I just thought I'd try that out to see what happened. Rating: K: Time: At Caskett's wedding reception.
"Can anyone tell me why we're here? Why we are here now?" Lanie asked, glaring at the whole room. "As my assistant, Alexis, has already said, everyone knew these two were destined for each other. Uh, huh! Everyone knew it, girl." She looked straight at Kate who laughed and hid her face in her hands. "And yet here they are, getting married five years, that's five whole years, people, after they should have. Girl, you should be an old married couple by now, with kids and everything."
"We'll work on that." Castle said in a stage whisper.
"You do just that." Lanie said, laughing as Kate playfully swatted Rick.
"I guess the reason they didn't get married before this, is that Kate just never got jealous of Castle and the…Well, let's just call them ladies."
"Lady number one would be Kyra Blaine, the one that got away. Now I talked to Kate about her and Kate wasn't one bit jealous, we're you?"
Kate laughed, but hid her face on Rick's shoulder.
"And Kate wasn't jealous of Jordan Shaw either, no matter how Castle salivated over her…Toys."
"Ellie Monroe? Who slept with Castle to get the part of Nikki Heat? Didn't bother the girl one bit, did it?"
Kate kept her face hidden, bit was clearly laughing. Rick was also laughing and nodding vigorously.
"And you had no trouble with your old pal Madison and those little Castle babies, did you?"
"We know where little Castle babies come from." Rick called out.
"And that Gina? You had no problem with her going to the Hamptons with a certain ruggedly handsome writer did you?'
For the first time, Kate stopped laughing and was whispering in Rick's ear.
Lanie grinned at her friend's discomfort. "Yes, girl. Now you know what I went through, all those years trying get you to see sense."
"Luckily, the next one was easy for Kate. How could she possibly be jealous of herself? Well, Nikki Heat, anyway. If someone wants to be you, how could you possibly be jealous of them?"
"It was easy." Kate said.
"And when you found Castle locking lips with Serena Kay, it didn't bother you one bit, did it?" Lanie said slyly.
"She's not dead, is she?' Kate shot back
"Sophia Turner is." Lanie said coldly. "And a damned good thing, although I know absolutely nothing about that."
A smile came to Lanie's face. "That's it, I think…Or was there something about boobs in the face?"
"Never." Rick said quickly.
Lanie raised her glass. "Kate, I've been giving you a hard time today, because of all the hard times you gave me when I was trying to steer you straight, but it's because I love the two of you. So, a toast to our happy couple, who will never need to feel jealousy again, since they will love each other…Always."