Haha the next instalment!
Only a few chapters to go after this so enjoy them while you can!
I knew I would finish this story eventually...

Hidan, Deidara, Gaara and Konan stood before the hokage with varying levels of anxiety.
On one hand, Gaara knew he had nothing to worry about and so, was not at all bothered by the meeting.
Hidan too, had by now become convinced that his disguise was flawless and that the Hokage would never see through it.
After all, if it could fool the people closest to Kakashi, his students and fellow ninja, he must be doing something right.
Deidara on the other hand, was shaking in his fishnet stockings.
Not only had he attacked the Kazekage, a fact that Tsunade was probably aware of, but he was the least acquainted with Konoha ninja and did not know how foolish they could be.
Deidaras panic did not lessen when Naruto and Sakura had entered the office.
Tsunades glare wavered over all of them before she began to speak.

"It has come to my attention that there are imposters in the village... I dont suppose any of you would know anything about that would you?"

The ninja in the room all shook their heads, an event Tsunade was prepared for.
Shuffling through the papers on her desk, the Hokage found the one she was after and held it up.

"Do you know what this is?"

There was a pause before Naruto hesitantly replied, "An incident report?"
Tsunades bright smile contradicted the anger in her eyes.

"Correct. Do you want me to tell you what the incident was that got reported?"

Hidan uneasily glanced over to Deidara who seemed to be sweating by this point.
The blonde never did do well under this kind of interrogation and the fact tht the Hokage was famous for her temper probably didnt lessen his anxiety.
Tsunade held the paper up and pointed between Deidara and Gaara,

"It is a report detailing several punches that apparently passed between you two. Now I myself personally apologise Kazekage Gaara but before I properly punish Ino, I need to find something out about you two..."

It was at this time, Deidara fell to his knees and clasped his hands together with tearful eyes.

"Please Tsunada-sama, I would never punch the kazekage, I'm too young to die!"

Hidan coughed to hide his snickers.
It wasnt very often that Deidara was reduced to begging but the need to hide the fact that they were Akatsuki members overrided any punishment the Hokage could have given them.
After all, they were deep in enemy territory with no weapons or clay and if the word got out that they were in the village every ninja in a 3 mile radius would show up.
Hidan watched Deidara out of the corner of his eye as tears began to well up in the blondes almond shaped orbs.
Deidara was really laying it on thick and Hidan made himself think about terrible things to keep the smile from his face.
His eyesight moved from Deidara to Gaara and Hidan was endlessly amused to find the Kazekage fighting to keep a straight face as well.
Before Tsunade could reply to Deidaras begging, a ninja with a messenger hawk entered the room and rushed over to the Hokage.
He leaned down and whispered in her ear, the Hokages face becoming more taunt as he spoke.
Finally, Tsunade was given a scroll and he left the room, nervously glancing over his shoulder as he did.
The blonde woman read through the scroll quickly as a heavy silence deadened the room.
She scowled and threw down the scroll before pointing vicously at Deidara.

"I see how it is now."

Deidara looked up at her with as much innocence as he could muster and tilted his head in confusion.

"Huh?"

"You knew that this man isnt really the Kazekage and THATS why you attacked him!"

Tsunades finger moved to Gaara as she declared him the imposter and a deadly expression came over his face.
Stomping forward, he grasped the scroll that the Hokage had tossed aside and began to read.

As Kazekage, I feel it is my duty to warn you that a man impersonating me has been seen heading towards the Village Hidden in the Leaves. I have even been notified that he possesses jutsu similar to mine.
I wish you all the luck in the world detaining and torturing him.
Kazekage Gaara.

The instant Gaara had finished reading he turned and pointed and accusing finger at Konan.

"You and your boyfriend planned this from the beginning didnt you?!"

Konans face went blank as she picked up the scroll and read it as well.
When she had finised reading her immediate reaction was to face palm and hunch over to hide her annoyance.
Obviously, Sasori had gone mad and was jeopardising everything, for what reason Konan couldnt fathom.
Before she could reply to Gaara, the door slammed open and Asuma, Shikamaru, Choji, Ino and Kakashi spilled into the Hokages office.
Kakashi caught sight of Hidan and pointed accusingly with his visible eye narrowed.
He didnt really have to say anything.
Ino peeked out from behind Choji and gasped dramatically at Deidara, the likes of whom was still on his knees, eyes wide at the new development, in front of the Hokage.
Naruto was blinking rapidly and looking between his two sensei's with his mouth slightly open in confusion
There was a dead silence before Hidan coughed and grinned through his mask at the real Kakashi.

"Well this is awkward."

Both Deidara and Ino pointed and screamed at each other.

Back in Sunagakure, Sasori was having the time of his life being the Kazekage.
Many times that day he wondered why doing this hadnt crossed his mind before.
Ruling as the Kazekage was MUCH better than serving in the Akatsuki.

Due to him increasing the work load of the sand shinobi to the point of slavery, they had finished his giant statue (which was fabulous by the way), were nearly finished his temple and had just begun construction on his new Art Museum.
He pondered the thought of sending Deidara an invitation before it occurred to him that the egotistical blonde would probably just destroy everything in it.
That being said, he could always have another one built.

There was a very meek knock at the door before a very nervous looking man entered.
Unlike the rest of the people Sasori had tormented today, this man was not a ninja.
He was in fact, the publisher of the local newspaper.
Clearing his throat nervously, the man, whose name badge read 'Steve' stumbled over his words,

"So I uh... I hear you wanted something published in the paper tomorrow Gaara-sama?"

Sasori cringed at the name 'Gaara' but nodded his head nonetheless.
He would have to find a way to overcome that name problem.
But yes, if he was going to rule this place then he was going to do it with an iron- ah... wooden fist.
This of course meant that new laws were to be passed down and everyone in Suna would have to abide by them.
He handed Steve a list and responded cheerfully,

"I want these new laws to be published in the paper for everyone to obey."

The newspaper man fiddled with something in his pocket, pulling out a pair of glasses and began to read.
If the first few laws made him gape, then the rest of them had him spluttering in protest.

"These rules are most unfair Kazekage-sama!"

Sasori frowned.
He had worked long and hard on these rules.
What could possibly be wrong with them?
Steve pointed to the first rule on the list,

"All blondes must either dye their hair or face execution?!"

Sasori nodded politely, "I dont like blondes."
A certain Akatsuki terrorist came to mind everytime he saw one.
Shaking his head in exasperation Steve then pointed out the next rules on the list.

"No fat people out after dark? Sunagakure is to be renamed Happy Land? Weekly bonfires and sacrifices to Lord Gaara? Kazekage! Isnt this going a bit far?!"

Sasori frowned and shook his head.

"If you cant obey my orders like the underling you are then I will have no further use for you."

Steve waved his hands weakly and forced a smile.
Some of the rules on this list were just plain ridiculous... Honestly he didnt know what was worse, Rule 27: On Thursdays everyones clothes must be made of rubber bands, or Rule 17: Anyone caught with a sunburn was to be sentenced to 6 wedgies.
They just didnt make sense.
But if Lord Gaara wanted them published then it will be done.
If only to save his own skin.

"Oh and dont forget the last and most important rule."

Steve glanced back down to the list again, preparing himself for something horrific.
Instead, he tilted his head.
This wasnt a rule so much as a change of title.

"You want to be known as Lord Scorpion...?"

Sasori smiled, pleased with himself for coming up with such a good name.
It was a way he could use his real name without anybody else finding out.
He nodded to Steve and dismissed him with the promise that if his list of laws werent in the paper the next day, he would make the man wear a bikini at his public execution.

It had taken about 30 minutes of fighting and arguing before Tsunade had managed to sit down everyone in her office to try and figure out who was who.
Both of the Ino's had to be held down to be stopped from pulling each others hair, whereas the Kakashi's had both just stood glaring with a weapon in their hand and waiting for the other to make a move.
Naruto had done nothing more than point between the two Kakashi's wildly all the while screaming random nonsense.
Finally, with the help of Shikamarus shadow jutsu, Tsunade had sat them all down and tied up everyones hands.
Now all that was left to do was question everyone until someone slipped up.
Gaara was looking particularly murderous so Tsunade decided to avoid him for now and start with the two Kakashis.
Folding her arms and standing before the two of them, she deducted that removing their masks wouldnt really accomplish anything as no one had actually ever seen the mans face.
Instead, she opted to ask the question that was bothering her the most.

"Have either of you ever slept with Ino?"

Both Deidara and the real Ino glared at the two men sitting across from them, making them both gulp and shake their heads with varying levels of disgust.
It was at this stage that Naruto tilted his head in confusion and spoke up.

"But Sai said they did..."

Both of the Kakashis glared at Naruto.
Tsunade shook her head and rolled her eyes.
What would Sai know about sex...?
Honestly, the boy could barely function in a social environment, how was he supposed to know anything about an intimate one
Sighing heavily, the Hokage voiced the question everyone was thinking, but no one was speaking.

"How would Sai know anything about sex."

Pointing innocently to Gaara, Naruto smiled happily, glad that he had an answer for the seemingly unanswerable question.

"He said that Gaara showed him vide-"

"Nope."

Everyone in the room turned their eyes to the Kazekage, who was at this point in time, snobbing them all with a bright red face.
When Asuma opened his mouth to question him, Gaara responded angrily,

"We dont talk about it..."

Clearly, Gaara and Sai's social interaction had been more frequent than previously thought.
Of course, no one had no way of knowing that Temari had been giving them lessons on how to be human beings and that when the subject of love had come up, she had become so frustrated with their lack of understanding that she had told the two boys to do their own research.
This has resulted Gaara and Sai stumbling across some very explicite material.
Tsunade raised an eyebrow at the Kazekages weirdness but elected to ignore it.
The topic was getting a bit weird anyway.

Okay, things are heating up a bit.
As always, leave your rates, reviews, complaints and excuses after the beep!