A/N: I'm not even going to tell you I'm sorry, because I'm too ashamed at how long it's taken me to update to do so (I just don't feel as if I deserve your forgiveness). I will give you the following words as a hint to why it's taken me so long:
OLD COMPUTER CRASHING…AND CRASHING…AND CRASHING.
NEW COMPUTER ON BACKORDER…WEEK AFTER WEEK (I swear, it's amazing that I have any hair left).
PROBLEMS CONNECTING TO THE INTERNET ON NEW COMPUTER…WEEK AFTER WEEK (It just got all straightened out today!).
And, well, it had been so long since I had access to the fic (when MS Word goes kablooie, you know you have trouble), that I had to re-read the whole fic and then just find the path of the story again.
I think I got it back, so here it is. I'm working on an original story while I'm working on this, so updates might not be posted on a regular basis. But I have the remainder of the fic locked into my head, and it will be finished (AHHHH, the joys of a new computer with Internet access…I will never take it for granted again!).
Hope you all like it and aren't too annoyed by the time between updates.
Thanks!
Emrys
The Weight of an Oath – Part 15
"It's freakin' dark in here," Rodney complained, apparently having forgotten his previous dejection. "How the hell are we supposed to see where we're going?"
A light turned on suddenly to illuminate Torca's irritated face.
"Oh," Rodney said, feebly and shifted Sheppard's right arm into a better position on his shoulder. "I guess that'll do."
Torca just looked disgusted and then turned the light towards the front of the cave.
"There's a pathway here. It goes pretty far back," Ronon said. Rodney could barely make out the big Satedan's form in the gentle glow of Torca's light.
"Is there any indication that a Stargate is present somewhere in these caverns?" Teyla asked. Her voice sounded reasonable, but there was an edge to it that made Rodney feel uncomfortable.
"Nothing," Ronon said unhappily.
"Oh, that's just great!" Rodney couldn't help his outburst. "We could be stumbling around in here for hours, maybe even days, and we still aren't certain that there's a Stargate anywhere around."
"I am certain that the stories of a Stargate being present within the Hollows are true," Torca said, insistently.
"And as I intimated before, your guesses just lend me oodles of confidence," Rodney responded, dryly.
"Well it doesn't seem like we have much of a choice now, do we?" Beckett asked from his position on the other side of Sheppard. He shifted under John's left arm which caused Sheppard to mutter incoherently.
"Oh God, let's not get him started," Rodney said, unnerved.
"Listen, Rodney, I'm sure that none of us are particularly happy about the circumstances, but it seems to me that if there's a path it must lead somewhere," Beckett ignored Rodney when he opened his mouth to counter-argue and instead continued his attempt to reason with the others. "Besides, there's not much we can do either way. I'm obviously no expert in these matters, but I know that even if we were able to make it back to the city Stargate, Colonel Sheppard would never survive the trip."
"Well thanks for that good news, Carson!" Rodney exclaimed, feeling an increasing anxiety. "Do you feel better now? Because I know I do," he then said cynically to Teyla.
"Rodney, you are not helping matters," Teyla replied, chastising.
"Sorry. Certain doom, certain way, remember?" Rodney explained, not unkindly to Teyla. He shared an uncharacteristic smile with the Athosian, and she nodded placating.
"I'll tell you one thing, though," Rodney muttered into the shaky quiet that followed. "I'm never trusting aliens again. No matter how bamboozled they are by Sheppard's good looks!"
"How dare you!" Torca's verbal response was immediate and was quickly followed by a well-placed kick to McKay's right shin that had him stumbling backwards.
During the slight scuffle, Rodney lost his grip on Sheppard, and the man's arm slid loose. Carson yelled something incoherent as the light moved about wildly and intermittently blinded each member of the team.
A bulky figure inserted itself between the four individuals involved to some level or another in the argument, and the light suddenly steadied.
"Quiet! All of you!" Ronon said in a voice that was quiet yet somehow communicated the command effectively. "If you all don't stop arguing like dogs you're going to bring on the attention of anyone else who might be wandering around in here. There's a clear path, let's follow it. Like the doctor said, we have no other choice."
The words had an immediate effect in that both Rodney and Torca appeared to be suitably embarrassed. Torca graciously extended a slight hand as a peace offering to Rodney and, albeit reluctantly, Rodney grabbed it and allowed himself to be pulled up.
"I apologize," he said in a tight, overly civilized voice. "I'm a little stressed right now. Surely you understand."
Torca held his gaze levelly and smoothed her now disheveled hair into place.
"I also apologize, Doctor McKay," she answered in a voice that mimicked McKay's in tone. "On occasion I am known to over-react. It is a trait that I learned from my father, and one which I struggle with when I find myself in—certain—circumstances." She paused for a moment and then appeared to study Sheppard before looking to Carson. "I apologize to you as well, Doctor Beckett. I had no intention of causing you or Colonel Sheppard harm. My temper was tested, and I reacted inappropriately."
The look she threw at McKay negated her earlier apology to him, but since there was no verbal aspect to it, Rodney had to take a moment to interpret the insult. When he finally understood what had just occurred, he opened his mouth to retort only to have Carson interrupt him.
"Aye, lass. Don't worry. I completely understand," Carson said meaningfully. He smiled briefly and encouragingly before gently motioning to Torca to follow Ronon down the pathway.
Very aware that nothing had really been resolved, McKay simply stood where he was and shook out his aggrieved leg. He was a bit dumbstruck as he watched Torca calmly take the light from Ronon. Teyla clicked on a second Netharian flashlight that Torca had handed her and then brushed by Rodney to take up the rear. The physicist couldn't miss the unmistakable reproach that had returned to her gaze, and he guiltily ducked his head. Still stymied by the argument he had apparently lost to the Netharian woman, Rodney stood quietly for a moment and found that he was only able to stumble towards Beckett and Sheppard when he heard Carson make a sound of exertion.
"Rodney, could you take your mind off of your problems for a moment and help me with the Colonel here? He's getting heavy." Carson's brogue was heavy, and his tone was distressed. Rodney felt the heat of guilt rise to his face.
He complied with Carson's request but couldn't help but grumble as he took half of Sheppard's weight.
"She probably drew blood," he complained, leaning heavily on his unharmed leg.
"Rodney, there's nothing the matter with your leg. She's just a wee mite of a lass, and I doubt that you'll even see any bruising. She just startled you is all."
Rodney made a disgruntled noise but began following the light that indicated Torca's presence in the darkness.
888
The pathway through the Hollows led them steadily deeper into the ground, and the chill of the air became evident as their breath began to condense around them. After an hour of walking, they still had not seen signs of Netharian guards or of a Stargate, and although the bit about the guards was welcome, the fact that they had no evidence of a 'gate was cause for worry.
Despite the weak illumination of the Netharian flashlights, the darkness and uneven ground beneath their feet made the walk arduous. Before long, Carson and Rodney were huffing beneath the Colonel's limp weight as their exhalations bloomed in the cold air.
Carson had them stop when Sheppard began struggling towards consciousness, because the Colonel seemed confused and had begun to fight the supportive hold that the two scientists had on him. Gazing uneasily at the stricken man, the group huddled together in the cold and hoped that Sheppard would quickly orient himself. But as the Colonel's struggles became more persistent and as he started to become increasingly vocal, Rodney shot Carson an accusing stare. An entire conversation regarding the intelligence of shooting John up with the Netharian drug then silently passed between the two men in pointed glares and aggravated scowls.
Ronon's own scowl spoke volumes as he stood up and scanned the darkness ahead of them.
"How long is this going to take?" the Satedan asked, clearly expecting that Sheppard's muffled outbursts would attract unwanted attention.
"I'm not sure," Carson admitted, as he placed a hand on Sheppard's chest in an effort to calm him down. "It could take a bit. He's weakening fast now, and I don't want to risk a sedative. It's either wait for him to become more cognizant so that he doesn't hurt himself or draw attention, or wait until he becomes unconscious again."
Ronon's scowl deepened, and Carson knew that he would have to take some control over the situation or the impatient warrior would hoist Sheppard over his shoulder and continue on. Carson just didn't think that Sheppard's body could handle such a rough level of physical motion since he was already so near to falling into shock and since they still had an unknown distance yet to travel. It was Beckett's responsibility to look after his patient, and so, staring resolutely into the face of the man who was practically two times his size, he did just that.
"Go scout ahead, or do whatever it is you usually do, Ronon," he said with forced nonchalance. "Give me a moment to take care of him and look over his wounds. By the time you get back, I'll have him settled."
He was lying, because he had absolutely no idea how long it would take him to get the Colonel calmed down. Ronon seemed to see through the false statement and actually stooped down in a gesture that confirmed Carson's suspicions that the Satedan would have no desire to wait around when lifting and carrying his commanding officer was an option. A surge of protectiveness for his patient caused Carson to tighten his grip on the now thrashing Sheppard. Despite the distracting pulse his blood made as it angrily pounded through his head, Carson forced a more genuine expression onto his face.
"Ronon, if we move him while he's so agitated, he'll go into shock and die. I need some time."
He didn't like the way Rodney's face fell at his statement, or how Teyla moved closer to her commanding officer's side as Torca gasped. But he saw that the truth had a definite effect on Ronon's reaching posture, and as the Satedan slumped a bit in acceptance, Carson cursed his bluntness. But there was nothing else he could have done. Ronon was a trained warrior, and until recently, a runner. His motives were honorable, and his overriding goal was to get them all back home and to safety. He had just needed to be reminded that getting home safely couldn't always mean blindly pressing ahead and hammering through any obstacle that was in the way.
"I'll scout ahead," Ronon said. He took the light away from Torca and threw a questioning glance in Teyla's direction. She bowed her head, and Carson knew that the Athosian woman had just agreed to watch over their little group. He returned his attention to his patient again, when Sheppard shouted almost too loudly. He looked up in alarm to see if Ronon had noticed, but the man had already gone on ahead, his position marked only by the faint, illuminating light.
888
The Wraith had him. Oh, God. The Wraith had him, and he was too weak to fight the nightmares that had become integral parts of his reality. The noise of their garbled voices was muffled, and the air was almost too thick to breathe, and he just could not fight. He wanted to spit in their white-blue faces, but his mouth was too dry. If fear hadn't paralyzed his throat, he would have screamed. Vaguely he realized that he had lost something in this surreal situation, because surely, before now, screaming would never have been an option. Jokes and bravado should have been standard operating procedure now, but for some reason they weren't an alternative. For some reason, he couldn't stand the thought of making a joke out of this situation. At least not this time around.
They pawed at him with hands that felt distant but obscene. A drop of sweat ran down the back of his neck, and, outrageously, it distracted him away from the hoard of aliens that surrounded him. He wanted nothing more than to swipe at it and scratch away the itch that followed its path down his skin. He thought he might go mad if he wasn't allowed to reach for it.
And that was when he realized that something was dreadfully wrong.
There were no circumstances that would call for him to be so distracted from the enemy. It just did not happen. Not to him. Despite his frivolous attitude, despite the wisecracks and disarming smile, he was a trained soldier.
The alarming realization that he had; in fact, become so dangerously sidetracked was followed by an even more alarming event. As he wildly fought to scratch and swipe at his own neck, his roving eyes saw Memphis again. The man was leaning between two of the Wraith and looking down on John with a strange smile rocking his lips. His guitar hung comfortably in his hands, and he was loosely strumming it, producing a soothing cacophony of sound. His last hallucination of Memphis was close to the front of his mind, so this time John knew that his old friend was just a dream. He opened his mouth to say so, but Memphis talked over anything he may have spoken.
"Wake up, Shep. They need you to wake up."
And he did.
888
The Colonel shuddered under Rodney's hands, and then suddenly went still. Too still, and Rodney thought that maybe his friend had just died.
A wave of grief swelled over him, and he grabbed frantically at Sheppard's arms, willing to see something, something that confirmed the weight of life in the prone body.
Before he had gone quiet, they had been struggling with the Colonel for what had seemed like an eternity but had probably only been way too long. Nothing had seemed to garner Sheppard's conscious attention, and then the man's muttering had transitioned into almost screaming. The sounds had been so distressing that Rodney had found himself praying for the painful singing to start up again. Trying to quiet him, Teyla had resorted to pressing her hand firmly against John's mouth in an attempt which had been steadily growing futile.
But then Sheppard had become motionless, and now Rodney thought he was dead.
"Carson?" Rodney whispered in a voice that showed he was prepared to be devastated.
Carson didn't answer him, choosing instead to focus more closely on his patient.
"Colonel Sheppard?" the medical doctor questioned.
"Doc?" Sheppard's voice was barely above a whisper, but Rodney heard it, and having heard it almost collapsed with relief.
"Aye, Colonel. Welcome back," Carson said, sharing a reassuring look with the others around him.
"Where?"
"Heading towards the Stargate, Colonel," Carson replied, softly. Rodney demonstrated his doubt of that statement by huffing sarcastically, and he tried not to be too insulted when Carson ignored him. Looking away while shaking his head with irritation, he jumped in surprise when he saw the hostile glare that Torca was directing to him. He resisted the petulant urge to stick his tongue out at her and returned his attention back to the conversation that was taking place between Carson and Sheppard.
As he did so, he couldn't help but wonder why the woman caused him to react and behave like a three-year old child.
"How are you feeling?" Carson asked. It seemed, to Rodney, that this was the stupidest question he had ever heard. He was about to tell Carson so, when Sheppard roused himself enough to answer.
"'m okay."
Rodney huffed again in disbelief and felt the need to express just how much of a lie that statement was when Beckett squeezed his arm so tightly that he was forced to just shut up. After he swallowed a couple of breaths of cold air, he shot an angry look at Carson, but mellowed down after seeing the mollifying look in the doctor's eyes.
"All right, Colonel," Beckett said, while continuing to watch Rodney carefully. "But I think you should take a minute to catch your breath before we go any further. Ronon's gone off to scout ahead, so you've got a little time."
Sheppard only nodded, and it was then that McKay noticed how the incapacitated man's respirations were too deep and too fast. He was taking in huge gulps of air that didn't seem to make much of a difference to his obviously failing physiology.
Alarmed, Rodney was intent on reaming Carson and his medical degree out for his ridiculous agreement to Sheppard's self-diagnosis when Carson indicated that they should all follow him a meter or so away from where Sheppard lay on the cavern floor.
"No, Rodney, he's not okay," Carson said in a harsh tone before Rodney could even make a suggestion about the doctor's lineage. "I'm not daft. He has to believe that he can go on to the Stargate, or else he hasn't got even a slim chance of surviving to make it out of this nightmare. He's too weak, verging on shocky, and I'm beginning to think that the hallucinations are now also being caused in part by oxygen deprivation. He's in grave condition, but we can't let him know that."
The grief returned in full force, and Rodney could only nod as his chest tightened with it. Teyla asked a question that Rodney was willing to admit was probably important, but that he just couldn't seem to concentrate on. His mind was fuzzy and blank for a little while, and when he came back to himself it was to see an obviously agitated Ronon standing before him. He couldn't remember when the Satedan had returned or how the conversation about Sheppard's health had ended.
Ronon was staring at him with a weird look on his face, and Rodney pulled himself together well enough to see that the big man's mouth was moving as if he were trying to communicate something. Suddenly, a whooshing noise filled his ears, and the ambient sound that he hadn't realized had disappeared, abruptly returned.
"—you hear me? I said we have another problem!"
Ronon was shouting, but it took some time for the words to reach Rodney. When they did, Rodney discovered that he just wanted to go back to that fuzzy and blank place.