Xxx
Belle wasn't sure how much time had passed. She refused to go near Ezra. Rumplestiltskin was almost always home, taking care of Ezra. When it was absolutely necessary for him to leave, Belle made him lock her in the dungeon. She couldn't risk hurting him again.
She sat before the fireplace, rocking back and forth as she tried to block out the signs of the child's cries. Finally, the cries subsided, which meant Rumplestiltskin had finally found a solution. Like every other time this had happened, Belle looked up towards the ceiling, wondering how they were doing. Had Ezra grown much? How was Rumplestiltskin holding up.
She had thought about leaving. She could, if she wished. But she couldn't leave Rumplestiltskin alone to raise Ezra. But she has already pretty much done that. She couldn't be trusted around Ezra, that much was certain. He would be safer with her gone. And there was no doubt Rumplestiltskin hated her now. What kept her there?
Belle barely registered that she was moving, and couldn't bring herself to stop. She left the room and went up the stairs. She took a left and went straight to the third door on the right. She peeked in through the cracked door into the nursery.
The sight made her gasp.
Rumplestiltskin was in a rocking chair, Ezra in arm while he used to other to bottle feed the child. Rumplestiltskin was whispering something to him in a language Belle couldn't understand, but the softness of the words left little doubt as to their meaning. She had never heard his voice sound so human. She had never seen such a soft expression on his face, brimming with love and affection. Yes, this was the man she had seen under the veil of the Dark One, the man she had fallen in love with.
A man who was now looking right at her.
Belle stood frozen, like she had walked in on something she shouldn't have. But Rumplestiltskin smiled at her, not telling her leave, but not telling her to enter. Without even thinking, she entered the room. She walked over to stand next to the man, looking down at her child. She looked away almost immediately. All she could see was him.
And she hated it.
She wanted to be able to love him. To hold him. She do everything the man she loved was doing.
The man who was raising the son of another man.
The man who loved the child of another man.
She was brought out of her thoughts by the touch of Rumplestiltskin's hand on her arm. She didn't look up. How could she? How could she meet his eyes?
"Give it time, Belle," Rumplestiltskin said softly. "You have been through much. From what that monster did to you to what Regina did. You are..." he paused, searching for the right words. "You are broken, but not beyond repair. Start small. Whatever you're comfortable with. As long as your are willing to try, something will come out of it. And you won't be alone. Ever. I will be here, as long as you'll have me."
"Promise?" her voice broke.
"Always."