Disclaimer: Maria-sama ga Miteru belongs to Konno Oyuki, Nagasawa Satoru, Shuueisha, and Geneon Entertainment, and Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death belongs to Guacamole Pictures. They are being used for non-profit purposes, and no copyright infringement is intended.
Notes: This story will contain mentions of BL (yaoi/slash) and yuri (femmeslash).
Chapter 2
Yuuki was sure this was the most embarrassing day of his life, hands down. That time in fifth grade when he'd wet the bed and his mother had accidentally mentioned it at the breakfast table couldn't even come close.
He'd thought the measuring for a girl's school uniform had been bad, but then had come the trying on, with accompanying undergarments and instructions on how to use them, including how to properly stuff the bra.
From there they'd gone to the beautician, who had complimented him on his "lovely features" (he'd wanted to die right there) and then told him what an easy job she'd have of fixing him up (he'd wanted to die right there and take that bubbleheaded bitch with him).
She'd done his nails, buffing and polishing and doing all manner of things to them (both fingernails and toenails, though he hoped nobody would ever be seeing those), then put funny lotions that all stunk of some kind of flower on his skin, making him wash his face at least three times.
The waxing (eyebrows and legs) had been mildly painful and equally humiliating, especially the snide comments from the officer chaperoning his errands (he'd wanted to apply the wax to select areas of the officer's body and see how he liked it).
Once the rest of his body was done, she started in on his hair, washing it with more sweet-smelling things (he'd wanted to cringe at that; was he going to smell like a fricking flower shop when she was done?), giving him extensions, and trying a few different styles to see what suited him best. She wanted to go with pigtails, but he vetoed that--it made him look entirely too much like Yumi, which was somehow worse than just looking like a girl. She'd protested good-naturedly but given him barrettes instead, one pair with pink flowers and another with multi-colored pastel butterflies. Dying of humiliation, he accepted them, knowing that she'd only come up with something worse if he didn't.
God, vindictive women were scary. Her fake sweetness and concealed streak of sadism were a hundred times worse than the officer's smug smirk and snide comments. He was almost overly obedient and attentive during the subsequent lesson in makeup application. Thankfully, she'd gone for an understated look; he'd been worried she'd make him look like a kogal or something.
As they left the beauty parlor, laden down with a bag of more makeup and beauty products than he'd ever dreamed existed, he shuddered internally, vowing to never go within a hundred meters of the horrific place again.
After that had been the etiquette lessons, little tips on things he needed to do to accurately pass as a girl for a short time (he'd been this close to socking the officer throughout most of the lecture-workshop; did the man never shut up?), which he did fairly well on overall. Covert training was part of the Hanadera curriculum, so he'd had experience in suppressing his instinctual actions in favor of recently learned ones.
By that night, everything was in order and they were boarding a train to Okayama, bags (including a makeup case, he was embarrassed to see) in tow.
After a quick bite to eat-- neither of them had eaten since lunch, and so they both wolfed down their food in a few short minutes-- the briefing began.
"The Lily Garden," the officer began, "is located on one of the smaller mountains of Sanbe-san. It's a bit of a hike, which is why we've given you camping gear.
"You'll also need a guide. There's a nice local fellow who's helped us out in that area in the past. We've already called ahead and arranged to meet him bright and early tomorrow morning. He won't be able to go into the Lily Garden with you, but he can take you to the edge. After that, it will all be up to you.
"He's told us that the Lillian Tribe has a stronghold in the center of the Lily Garden, and that members of the tribe, equipped with bows and arrows, are always standing guard there and patrolling the perimeter of the garden. It hasn't been confirmed, but on the off chance that they have guards out patrolling the surrounding forest, you'll need to remain, er, 'in gear'"--he made air quotes with his fingers--"the entire time. In fact, it would be best if the guide didn't suspect anything either, but you can let him in on the plan if it proves necessary."
Yuuki groaned internally. He'd thought he'd be able to get suited up just before entering the garden, but it looked like he'd be stuck going undercover for the entire mission. He hoped he'd at least be able to wear the Hanadera female field uniform--that, at least, was more practical for hiking up a mountain than the school uniform, and a good sight less embarrassing.
As if he'd sensed what was on Yuuki's mind, the officer brought up that issue next. "We've provided you with a few changes of ladies' field uniforms"--Oh, thank God--"but we feel it might be more, er, influential if you wear the school uniform into the Lily Garden itself. To, er, blend in better, bond with the young women, all that."
Well, at least the shoes would be comfortable. He was sure he would have been embarrassed--in more ways than one-- if he'd had to try walking around in high heels. He hadn't the foggiest idea how girls did it, and it wasn't something he wanted to try, ever.
After a nod of assent from Yuuki, the man continued. "Once you're inside the Lily Garden, meeting up with the tribe shouldn't be a problem. The most likely scenario is that the guards will see you and bring you to the central stronghold; if none of them are nearby when you enter the garden, head in that direction and you should eventually come across some members of the tribe.
"There's no telling what they'll do once you're there, or who you'll be allowed to see. God willing, they won't lock you up." He paused, the "or worse" unspoken but understood. "You are to learn what you can about the tribe-- their size, their weaponry, their command structure and goals if that's at all possible. You are also to carry out your primary mission, that is, to ascertain the current status and whereabouts of the missing operatives. If you are unable to carry out the mission but have the chance to get out, take it. We don't want to lose you, and any information about the tribe may be of value to us, no matter how slight. Understood?"
"Yes, sir."
"Any questions?"
"What will happen after I leave the Lily Garden, sir?"
"The guide will be waiting for you in the surrounding forest, in a pre-arranged location. He'll take you back. Anything else?"
"No, sir."
"Very good. I suggest you use the rest of the trip to get some shut-eye. You'll need it for tomorrow." The corner of the man's mouth quirked up a bit. "Have to make sure you get plenty of beauty rest now."
Groaning internally, Yuuki just nodded and leaned back in his seat, closing his eyes. He had a million things to think about, but the afternoon had worn him out more than he would have thought possible. He soon found himself drifting off, waking only briefly for the train change in Okayama.
They arrived at Odashi station in the middle of the night. A car was waiting for them there, and Yuuki fell back asleep after dumping a few pieces of luggage into the trunk and sitting down in the backseat.
The officer woke him after what he was sure had been mere minutes, and he looked out the window to see that it was still pitch black out.
"We're here," the officer told him in a whisper.
"Here?" Yuuki asked blearily, not fully awake yet.
"Oda," the man clarified. "We'll be meeting our guide here in a few hours. I've already arranged a room at a local onsen, they're awaiting us now."
"Yes, sir," Yuuki said, climbing out of the car and coming around to the trunk to help with the luggage.
An old man, looking cheerful and welcoming despite the late hour, met them at the entrance and showed them to their room. Futons had already been laid out for them, and after giving a polite thank-you and goodbye to both the old man and the driver, Yuuki crawled into his without so much as changing his clothes.
Morning would come in a few hours, and with it, the beginning of his mission, but for now, the officer was right-- he did need his beauty sleep if he didn't want to end up having to wear five pounds of makeup the next day.