Spoiler Alert: Spoilers for Seasons 2 & 3, up to and including "Silent Night".

A/N: It's so great to have lots of people reading my story, and thanks to all of you! I've also been thrilled to hear from some new reviewers, which is great. If there are any questions you're waiting for the answer to, let me know; readers help keep me on track with all the plot threads I have going!

Thanks to marialisa, who sent in the 200th review – consider this a shower of confetti and brass band!

Disclaimer: No infringement of copyright is intended. All characters originated with CSI:NY; all song lyrics are from The Beatles.

It's A Long Journey Home

Chapter 23: Facing the Music

Always, no sometimes, think it's me

But you know I know when it's a dream

I think I know I mean a "Yes" but it's all wrong

That is I think I disagree

Let me take you down, cos I'm going to Strawberry Fields

As ordered, Danny processed the dummy, looking for fibres, for prints, for anything which could tie the object to the idiots who had placed it in the park and nearly scared a seniors' walking group into a collective heart attack. Hawkes was looking over statements collected by Flack and other officers, and he wandered into the lab about two hours after Danny had started.

"Find anything?" he asked, handing Danny a cup of coffee.

"Yeah, I got prints from at least three people, some epithileals, all from males, fibres from a car trunk – those are being analysed now to see if we can narrow down the car. The rest of the stuff is just bio-matter from the park, except for a smear on the heel. Haven't figured that out yet, but it could tell us where the mannequin came from originally." Danny took a sip of the coffee; it was awful, but it was hot.

"Okay," Hawkes sighed. "I can't see this going much further; once Mac calms down, we'll back-burner it."

Danny nodded judiciously, "Unless they do it again or up the ante, anyway."

Nervously, he took another drink from his cup, wincing as he burned his tongue. "Umm, Hawkes, got a minute?"

Hawkes had been turning to go, but looked at Danny, struck by the uncertainty in his tone. "Sure. What's up?"

Danny rubbed the back of his head, "I just want to say I'm sorry if I've been off the past week or so. This thing with Montana… well, it shook me, I guess. I didn't mean to take anything out on you."

Hawkes grinned, "Don't worry about it. You didn't do anything to me. You and Linds okay?"

Danny shrugged, "I don't even know what that means with her anymore. But, yeah, I guess."

Hawkes looked at Danny carefully, "You sleeping?"

Danny snorted, "Not much. It's okay, though. I'll catch up."

Hawkes pursed his lips, "I can give you something if you need it."

"Naw, that's okay, man. I'm not much for artificial aids, ya know? If I could just … I don't know. Help her out, I guess. Then I might stop having nightmares," Danny admitted, a little shamefacedly.

"Well, come and eat with me now; we'll see what we can figure out."

"I'll meet you in fifteen, okay? I'm just going to catalogue the evidence."

Hawkes agreed and walked down the hallway to the break room, finishing his coffee and rinsing out his cup. Stella came up behind him, reaching past him to grab some coffee too.

"You up for a bite, Sheldon? I need to take a break – if I stare into one more eyepiece today I'll go blind," Stella was working on a routine trace assignment, trying to differentiate prints taken from a public washroom where an assault had taken place. It was back-breaking, tedious, and usually thankless work, but had to be done.

"I'm meeting Danny in fifteen; want to join us?" Hawkes cocked an eyebrow at her quizzically.

"What do you think? You two need some alone time?" Stella teased, but her eyes were serious.

"I think you should come, and I'll ditch early so you two can talk." Hawkes knew that Stella and Danny were close, and he figured Danny needed a woman's perspective on things. It couldn't hurt, anyway.

"Okay," Stella pursed her lips. "I'll meet you – where exactly?"

Most of the plan went fine: Hawkes and Danny met at one of the small diners in the area which catered mostly to the NYPD and NYFD; they had just ordered lunch when Stella walked in, saw them and waved, moving towards them.

Hawkes looked up to see Danny go dead white at the sight of Stella. "Umm, Hawkes, I'm going to go back to the lab. Keep Stella company, okay?"

Hawkes grabbed Danny's arm as he started to move, "What is going on? You and Stella need to talk, Danny," he hissed under his breath.

Danny collapsed back in his chair, "Can't."

"You aren't going anywhere. I'm going back to the lab," Hawkes stood up, grabbing his sandwich to take back with him, but turned back to Danny when he heard a quiet but heartfelt, "Shit, the dynamic duo."

Danny was staring Don Flack, who had walked in a few paces behind Stella, and was heading equally purposefully towards their table. Sheldon grinned, dropped ten dollars on the table to pay for his sandwich, and tipped a salute to the pale young man in front of him. "No one expects the Spanish Inquisition! Good luck, Messer."

Sourly, Danny watched the rat leaving the sinking ship. He had been set up. Oh well, it wasn't as if Don and Stella weren't on his list of people to talk to. He just had hoped for a little more time to work out what he was going to say, that was all.

Besides, he only had an hour for lunch, and he had already been gone … he glanced at his watch. Oh. Only 15 minutes. This could be a long lunch hour.

He grinned a little shakily as Stella and Don sat down across from him, having both greeted Hawkes on his way out the door. They ordered from the server on their way to the table, so they had time to focus on Danny.

"How's Lindsay?" Stella asked.

"We talked this morning; I get the feeling she's being kept out of the investigation, which is driving her nuts." Danny knew the two in front of him would never let things stay focused on the case Lindsay was dealing with. On the other hand, they were as curious as he was; he thought he may be able to keep them distracted for at least long enough for him to think of what to say to them both.

"What do you mean?" Flack was so easy to hook.

Danny explained the set up as best he could, adding his own interpretations to what Lindsay had told him.

"So, the sheriff wants to keep her in the shooting gallery, but doesn't want her touching his case? And her supervisor has her doing clerk work?" Flack's indignation was almost comical.

"Well, I think she's found a way around that," Danny was aware his voice had flattened and shifted uneasily. "Sounds like she's teaming up with her old partner, John McKim. But he at least is telling her stuff. She wants me to call tonight so she can update me on the case."

Stella shot a sharp glance at Danny, but didn't respond to the tone she heard. "McKim a street cop?" When he nodded, she went on, "That probably means he has better access to the buzz around the case. He can lock her into local gossip and other suspects. Are you worried about him?"

Her last question took Danny off-guard. "Not as a cop. Lindsay trusts him, and God knows she doesn't trust easily."

"So what about him worries you?" Stella bit into her sandwich as if it were a casual question, but the tension in her hands betrayed her.

"They're close," Danny admitted after a moment of strained silence.

"What about you two? You talked, didn't you?" Don asked. "Didn't you work things out?"

Danny closed his eyes. "You do know this is private, don't you?" he tried. "It's really just between Lindsay and me?"

Stella was shaking her head. "No way. You tell Mac you've done something unforgivable, you don't talk to anyone else at all, you nearly kill yourself with guilt, and who knows what Lindsay is going through. Sorry, Messer, but you are not doing this without us. You're crap at it."

Danny sighed, "Stella…"

Don broke in. "Look Danny, we don't need details. We just want to know that you are okay." Then he grinned, trying to lighten the mood, "Of course, should you want to share details, especially the hotter ones …"

Stella elbowed him.

Danny laughed though. That was the Don Flack he had prowled with for the past five years, not the serious guy who had been speaking a minute ago. He looked down at the table, at his hands, twisted together, and for a moment, all he could see were the bruises on Lindsay's wrists again.

"When I took Lindsay home, I went upstairs with her. I thought I was making sure she was safe, you know? But I was so angry. The whole day just twisted together, sort of. Her leaving, and then thinking she was …" He swallowed hard. "Then waiting for her to come back. That was hard. All I could think was what if that plane didn't make it either? When she showed up back here, I couldn't say anything. And once she told us, explained what had happened…" he shook his head and took a drink of water, the rest of his lunch ignored.

Stella reached out as if to take Danny's hand, but stopped just short, as if afraid he would break at a touch.

"Anyway, by the time we got to her apartment, I couldn't see straight. I wanted … I don't know. To make her mine. To make her real." He rubbed his head with frustration. "I can't explain it. I just pushed her up against the wall and …" He flushed, unable to look Stella in the eyes, and took a shaky breath. Confessing his actions, especially to Stella, was a penance worse than hell-fire, he thought.

"We made it to the bedroom; it didn't take long the first time. When it … she cried like I'd broken her heart, Stella. She had bruises." He rubbed his own wrists.

"So, what? You left?" Stella's voice was quiet and, like Mac's before, uninflected. Don was looking down at the table, dragging a spoon through a pool of condensation from the water glass.

He looked up in shock. "Of course not! She was crying, Stel. How could I leave? I drove her to the airport in the morning."

"And you two … talked all night?" Stella asked.

"Not exactly."

"So you … slept together?" Stella was trying to keep this conversation PG.

Danny's face changed, softening and glowing, although he had no idea. "Yeah."

Stella pushed a little harder, in a heated undertone. "Lindsay told her mother she was a more than willing participant, Danny. What does that sound like to you?"

Danny ducked his head and refused to look at Stella. "I still forced her," he said stubbornly.

Stella shook her head pityingly. "Danny, for a smart guy, you sure have a lot to learn about women."

Don couldn't hide his snort of amusement at Danny's shocked face.

"Umm, Stella, I'm not sure if …" he stuttered.

She sighed, "Look, I am going to let you two in on a little secret, which could have me banned from the sisterhood for life, and which you are never to repeat under pain of death. Sometimes, under certain conditions, with the right person, a woman doesn't mind being – shall we say – overwhelmed? Especially if the guy she is with is someone who is usually SO cool, SO in control that you have to wonder if there's any blood in his veins. It's … powerful, you know?" She looked at Danny's red face and decided he could manage one more hit before she had to give up. "How was the rest of the night?"

Danny nearly swallowed his tongue, but managed to stammer out, with a hint of a grin, "Overwhelming."