A/N - Hey guys, sorry it took longer than expected for me to get this chapter up. I ended up rewriting the last part, which then ended up taking more time than I thought it would. Again, I really want to thank all of you for the review, alerts, etc. I'm glad that you guys are still liking to the story. A couple of things: This chapter has a bit of a time jump. I've jumped them ahead a few months and that's mostly because I could probably write 100 chapters of Dan and Blair's daily lives. I may be doing some more time jumps in the next few chapters, mostly because there are a few things that I want to explore before the end of the story and I think in order to do that properly (and realistically) there will need to be some time jumps. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask and I'll try to explain them. I hope you guys like the chapter. Please review!
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
XOXOXOXOXOXOXO
"Dan, I'm touched but I think we should just be friends." Nate smirks as Dan holds out a small velvet box when they're hanging out at the loft one afternoon.
"Shut up Archibald." Dan rolls his eyes. "They're earrings for Blair. Our anniversary is coming up. I wanted your opinion."
"Oh, OK…" Nate takes the box from Dan. "But wouldn't Serena be a better choice to ask then me?"
"Normally yes, but you know those two are thick as thieves. And you know that Blair is going to grill her. I don't trust her not to say anything and I want it to be a surprise."
"Ah, makes sense." Nate nods, looking down and opening the box to look at the small, simple diamond studs. "They're nice." Nate nods, closing the box and handing it back to Dan.
"I know they're not as extravagant as what Blair's used to getting but…" Dan looks down looks down at the earrings for a second before sliding the box back into his pocket and looking up at Nate. "I thought I'd cook her dinner here too. I think that's a pretty decent anniversary, right?
"Yeah man, Blair's going to love it. She's a sucker for that romantic stuff." Nate nods with a smile, slapping him on the back.
XOXOXOXOXOXOXO
"Hey, what are you doing down here?" Dan looks surprised to see Blair waiting for him outside his English class. "I figured once you transferred to Columbia, you would never step foot on this campus again?" He smiles and Blair just looks at him for a second before rolling her eyes.
"Well, normally I wouldn't but there happens to be one student who goes here that I actually stomach." Blair crinkles her nose at him and Dan just chuckles, looping his arm around her waist and leaning down to kiss her.
"I really hope that one student is me." He murmurs against her lips and Blair laughs. "So, seriously, not that I mind seeing you, obviously, but what are doing all the way down here in the middle of the day? Don't you have classes today?"
"It's Thursday. I only have one morning class remember? And I knew this was your last class for today, so I thought that I would surprise you." Blair links her arm through his as they make their way toward the coffee shop and Dan nods, smiling down at her.
"Well, it's a wonderful surprise." He kisses her forehead lightly before pulling open the door to café and Blair smiles, stepping in. "Coffee?" He raises an eyebrow at her and Blair nods. "Grab a table." Dan smiles again before heading toward the counter, glancing over his shoulder as Blair makes her way toward a table in the corner. Blair is texting furiously when he approaches the table with their drinks and she looks up with a smile.
"Thank you." She sips her latte as Dan settles into his seat across from her.
"So, what's really going on, Blair?" Dan leans back in his chair, watching his girlfriend closely. She was planning something, he could tell. "Are we plotting against someone again?"
"No." Blair reaches across the table to slap his hand lightly and Dan smiles. "OK, so, um, I guess you know what tomorrow is right?"
An amused smile spreads across Dan's face as he looks at her.
"Yeah, I do. Actually, I…" Dan begins.
"We didn't really discuss anything so I didn't know if you had anything planned, but I pulled some strings and I was able to get us a 8:30 reservation at Masa tomorrow night." Blair beams happily and Dan just looks at her. "I know it's a little early but it was the best I could do on such short notice."
"Masa?" Dan says slowly. "I thought it took weeks to get a reservation there."
"It does." Blair beams. "But I dropped my mother's name and Lily's…" Blair gives him a slightly embarrassed smile. "I hope it's OK that I made the reservation without talking to you first." Blair reaches across the table again to rest her hand on Dan's. "It's just that it's taken us a while to really get our footing, but I feel like we're there now and I just wanted tomorrow to be a new beginning for us."
Dan's quiet for a long moment as he looks at his girlfriend, who is watching him practically jumping out of her skin.
"Yeah, of course. Masa sounds great." Dan says finally and Blair lets out a little squeal as she leans across the table to kiss him.
XOXOXOXOXOXOXO
"Are you OK?" Blair asks the next evening when they're seated at their table at Masa.
"Sure." Dan nods but Blair frowns. Clearly something was bothering him. She was able to sense his tension from the moment that he picked her up but she couldn't figure out what was wrong.
"OK, well, did you want your present?" Blair tries another approach and Dan looks up at her. "Here." She holds out a small wrapped gift and Dan pauses for a second before slowly taking the package from her.
"Um, I got you something too." Dan reaches into his coat pocket and slowly (almost reluctantly Blair notices) pulls out a similar sized gift, holding it out to her. Blair gives him a bright smile as she rips the paper off and opens the small velvet box. Her expression softens as she looks down at the earrings before she lifts her gaze to Dan again.
"Thank you. I love them." She leans across the table to kiss him quickly before nodding toward the gift in Dan's hands. "So open yours."
Dan gives her a small smile before slowly opening the package and he freezes at the distinctive blue box in his hand. He throws a slightly perturbed look at Blair and she frowns again before shaking her head and grabbing the box from him.
"I scoured the city looking for just the right ones." Blair lifts the cover off the Tiffany's box and pulls out the small black box, opening it and holding it out for Dan to look at. His eyes slowly drop to the sterling silver cuff links for a second before he looks back at Blair. "They're monogrammed too. See, DH."
"Blair, you shouldn't have. This is too much." Dan shakes his head, closing the box. Blair frowns again but before she has a chance to say anything the waiter arrives with their first course. However, she decides not to focus on that and attempts to make small talk through out the whole meal but Dan's responses are less then forthcoming. By the time the get back to the penthouse, Blair is beyond frustrated.
"Dan, what is your problem?" She grabs his arm when they step off the elevator.
"Nothing." Dan shakes his head, turning away and heading toward the stairs.
"Like hell nothing." Blair snaps. "You have been sullen and moody all night! Why are you so upset? What did I do?"
"Are you serious?" Dan's eyes flash angrily as he spins around. "For god's sake Blair, how much did you spend on that meal?"
"What?" Blair stares at him in complete disbelief. Is that what he was angry about? Masa? "Dan, what are you talking about? Did you not enjoy dinner?"
"I don't care about the stupid dinner, Blair!" Dan snaps and Blair just stares at him. "All I wanted was to spend tonight with you! I certainly didn't need you to waste a normal person's monthly salary on dinner and cuff links that I don't even need!"
"Well, I'm sorry for trying to make our anniversary special." Blair crosses her arms, anger bubbling in her blood.
"We didn't need all of this, Blair!" Dan crosses the room to stand in front of her. "Why couldn't we have just spent a quiet evening alone together at the loft?"
"Because!" Blair screams in frustration, hitting his chest. "Every night is a quiet evening alone at the loft!"
"Gee, I didn't realize that spending time with me was so horrible for you." Dan barks at her, spinning on his heel and heading into the living room.
"Do not put words in my mouth, Dan Humphrey!" Blair charges after him. If Humphrey wanted a fight tonight he was certainly going to get one. "That is not what I said and you know it! What is so wrong with me wanting to go out for our anniversary? If you didn't want to go to Masa, maybe you should have grown a pair and told me that instead of acting like a complete ass all night!"
"Really Blair? And when was I supposed to tell you that?" Dan glares at her. "After you had already made the reservation? When you told me that the limo was going to pick me up at 7:30 sharp so I better be ready? Or maybe when you told me that it was comfortable and casual, but not Brooklyn comfortable and casual, so maybe I should wear the sweater you bought me?"
"So I was supposed to just let you wear whatever? Masa has a dress code and it doesn't include plaid!" Blair snaps and it's Dan's turn to let out a frustrated scream.
"I like plaid! Plaid is who I am!" Dan finally snaps and his voice echoes through the empty apartment. "I don't need $300 cashmere sweaters or $900 meals or $1,800 Armani suits or fucking monogrammed cuff links! I'm not Chuck Bass! So stop trying to make me into him!"
Blair gasps as soon as the words leave his mouth and her hand flies out to connect sharply with his cheek, causing Dan to wince a little at the sting. Her breathing is shallow as she stares at him, willing herself not to cry as tears sting her eyes, and she looks away for a second.
"Shit. Blair, I…" Dan begins but stops when Blair lifts her head.
"Get out." Her tone is as cold as the look in her eyes and Dan blanches.
"Blair, I didn't…" Dan tries again and Blair shoves him as hard as she can toward the elevator.
"I said, get out!" Blair shoves him again.
"Blair…" Dan reaches for her, his expression remorseful. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean that."
"Yes, you did." Blair crosses her arms as she shakes her head at him. "But if you think that I'm going to apologize to you for being who I am, for liking nice things and wanting my boyfriend to have nice things, then you are delusional, Humphrey." Blair pauses for a second. "Because the truth is that I don't want to spend every single night watching movies in Brooklyn! I want to go to parties and eat in nice restaurants and I want my companion to be dressed appropriately! That doesn't make me a bad person, Dan! But I guess that doesn't matter because, apparently, it's all about what you want! You never stop to think about what I want!"
"Have you completely lost your mind? All I ever do is think about you want! This is how we ended up here to begin with!" Dan clenches his fist as his frustration starts to rise again.
"All you ever do is think about what I want?" Blair stares at him for a second before letting out a sarcastic laugh. "That is the biggest load of crap I have ever heard! The fact of the matter is, I am the only one who has had to sacrifice anything for this relationship!"
"Please! What the hell have you sacrificed?" Dan scoffs. "I'm the one who had to sit around and wait until you figured out all of your shit with Chuck! I'm the one that's being led around like your little Brooklyn charity case! Yeah, you've really sacrificed! I'm so sorry for wanting to keep what little bit of dignity I have left, Blair!"
"I almost lost my best friend because of this relationship!" Blair screams practically at the top of her lungs. "Do you have any idea how horrible that was for me? The thought that Serena might not forgive me, it literally tore me up inside. But I was willing to do it… for you because I thought that you were worth it. Although right now, for the life of me, I can not figure out why!" Blair turns away, heading for the stairs but stops to look back at him. "You know, you accused me of trying to turn you into Chuck but you're doing a fine job of that all on your own…preying on my weaknesses and throwing my mistakes in my face to hurt me, you might as well change your last name to Bass because that's classic Chuck." Blair pauses for a second as she takes a shaky breath and all Dan can do is stare. "You don't have to worry about being my charity case anymore, Dan, because you can take your dignity and you can go to hell."
Blair swallows the sob that's rising in her throat as she turns away, heading up the stairs.
"If you walk away again, Blair, I'm not going to chase after you." Dan's voice stops her half way up the stairs. Blair hesitates and for a second Dan thinks that she's going to turn to look at him. His heart sinks when, instead, she squares her shoulders and continues up the stairs.
XOXOXOXOXO
By the time Dan gets back to Brooklyn, he's completely wrecked. How had this evening turned into such a complete mess? How the hell had they gone from celebrating their anniversary to… breaking up? Had he and Blair just broken up? He didn't even know. Falling onto to the couch, Dan dropped his head in his hands for a second before staring at his cell phone on the coffee table. Should he call her? Should he go back to the city and force her to see him? Should he just wash his hands of the whole thing and forget her? That was certainly an option. If he just walked away now, in no time at all he'd be laughing about those few months when he thought he was in love Blair Waldorf.
The thought makes his stomach turn and Dan swears under his breath. Yeah, the only problem with that scenario was that he didn't think he was in love with Blair - he was in love with her, point blank. There was no getting around it. He didn't want to walk away and forget her. He couldn't walk away and forget her. She was all that he wanted.
If you can get passed those walls, you won't find anyone who's got a bigger heart.
Nate's words from months ago echo in his mind and Dan dropped his head into his hands again. Nate, for all of the ribbing about him not being so smart, had been right about that. Yes, it had been a struggle but he had been able to finally get Blair to open up to him, to let him see the amazing girl that he knew was in there, and what does he do? He plays the Chuck card. What the hell was the matter with him? After everything that they had gone through to be together, how could he have fucked it up so bad? And now it was just over? This just couldn't be the way they ended.
Sighing Dan picked his phone up and flipped it open, scrolling through his contacts to Blair's name. No, he couldn't call her. He needed to see her. He had to fix this. Grabbing his keys, Dan bolted from the loft and down the stairs. Pushing the door to the street open, he freezes when he finds Blair pacing on the sidewalk in front of his building.
"Blair?" She looks up with a start at Dan's voice and the two of them stare at each other for a long moment. "What are you doing here? How long have you been out here?"
"A while." Blair crosses her arms defensively as Dan approaches her and he frowns but doesn't say anything. He supposes that he deserves that. "I had my driver bring me here but I couldn't bring myself to actually go in."
"But you came…" Dan's expression softens as he looks at her.
"I don't know why." Blair looks up at him, her arms still crossed. "I'm still so mad at you, Humphrey. You had no right to say those things to me…"
"I know. I didn't have the right to say any of that to you, Blair." Dan slowly reaches out to brush the hair from her face. "It looks like this time I let my insecurities get the best of me. I shouldn't have said that you were trying to turn me into Chuck."
"Then why did you say it? Because if you actually think that little of me…" Blair shakes her head quickly, tears stinging her eyes and Dan cringes. He hated to see her cry and he really hated being the reason that she cried.
"I don't believe that, Blair. You know I don't believe that." Dan sighs a little, lifting his hand to wipe the tears from her face. "It all just got to be too much. The clothes and the restaurants… Lily Van der Woodson Bass Humphrey may be my stepmother, but that's not my world. I don't need to wear fancy clothes or eat at expensive restaurants. I'm not that guy. I'm the guy that wants to wear jeans and plaid and spend my nights curled up with my girlfriend."
"Dan, you know that I love curling up with you at the end of the day." Blair blinks back tears again as she shakes her head. "But the clothes and the restaurants, that's still my world. I'm the girl who likes wearing Prada and Dior and who likes to eat at Masa. I can't change who I am, Dan, and I won't apologize for it either." Blair takes a shaky breath as she looks up at him, taking his face in her hands. "But, you have to know that I never meant to make you feel bad about who you are or where you come from. The fact that you are nothing like Chuck Bass is just one of the many reasons that I love you. I wasn't thinking. I'm used to showing the people that I care about how I feel by buying them things. I don't know any other way. I'm still kind of new at this whole healthy relationship thing, Humphrey."
"I know and I don't want fight with you, Blair." Dan's expression softens as he moves closer, his arms sliding around her waist. "I hate fighting with you." Tears fill Dan's eyes as he looks down at her. "I fucked up. I know that. I was a pompous ass. I took my frustrations out on you when I shouldn't have. It wasn't fair and I am so sorry for the things that I said to you. You tried to do something nice for me tonight and I let my pride get in the way. I don't care if we have some differences. We have a lot in common too. And we can compromise, Blair. If we stay in on Friday night, then we'll go out on Saturday."
"Dan…"
"Blair, please..." Dan tightens his arms around her and Blair just looks up at him. "Look, after everything that happened with Chuck, I told you that the only way we could ever work was if we talked to each other. I didn't listen to my own advice. I was an ass. I let my issues get in the way. I let them build up until I snapped and I'm sorry but I will never do that again." Dan brushes the hair from her face gently. "I told you that you were the most important thing in my life and I meant that. I will make this up to you, I promise." Dan looks down at her almost desperately. "I will do whatever it takes to make this up to you."
Blair is quiet as she stares at him, her eyes searching his for a long time before she lets out a sigh and slowly wraps her arms around him, burying her face in his chest.
"I guess we both made some mistakes tonight." Her voice is muffled as her tears soak into his shirt. "Do you still love me?" She looks up at him slowly and Dan just smiles before pulling her back into his arms.
"Always." Dan murmurs into her hair, his arms tightening around her. "It's almost midnight, what do you say we go inside and try and salvage the last couple of minutes of our anniversary."
"That sounds like the best idea I've heard all night." Blair nods into his chest and Dan looks down at her, kissing her deeply for a second before he leads her inside and up the stairs to the loft. Blair follows him silently, her heart pounding in her chest.
Was she crazy for coming here? It seemed like everything in her and Dan's relationship was a battle. First Serena, then Chuck, now this. There was always something or someone getting in between them. It seemed the moment they cleared one hurdle, another one popped up in front of them. And yet, they were still here, still struggling through. Wouldn't it be easier for the both of them to just cut and run now?
The thought makes her blood run cold and her stomach turn as she stares at the back on Dan's head. She still didn't know when Dan Humphrey had become the one person in the world she knew that she couldn't live without, but somewhere along the way he had. He was the only person that she wanted. That was why she had followed him to Brooklyn tonight. Yes, he had been a first class ass but how many times had she done that? How many times had she flown off the handle? Too many to count and every single time, Dan had come after her. So, she knew that this time it was her turn to come after him. The moment she heard him leave the penthouse she knew that she was going after him; that she had to go after him.
She's in Dan's arms the moment they reach the loft and Blair feels her whole body flush when he buries his face in her hair, murmuring his apology over and over. Their lovemaking that night is like nothing Blair has ever known before. Sex with Dan had always been amazing but there's something different about tonight. This time is more intense than anything they've ever shared together - as if both of them know on some unconscious level that, while it was never actually said, something has changed between them forever - but in the best possible way. When they both collapse, exhausted, on the living room floor, Blair finds herself smiling as Dan drapes an old blanket over them and pulls her closer. She rests her head against his chest the way she has more times than she can remember and listens to his heart beating - slow, steady, comforting and she feels at peace in way that only happens when she's with him. The night certainly hadn't gone the way she thought it would, but when Dan's arms tighten around Blair knows that she's safe and protected… simply put, she knows that she's home. Her eyes slowly drift shut as she settles herself comfortably against him and Dan's lips brush across her forehead, causing a soft sigh to escape her lips. They might not have the perfect relationship, but it's real, that much she's sure of. And in that moment Blair can't help but think that if she could end every day (good and bad) in Dan's arms for the rest of her life... she might just be OK with that.