Sword and the City Rewrite (Part IV)
Disclaimer: I don't own Charmed or any of the characters… although, I really wish I did own at least a certain slightly neurotic, but charmingly adorable future Whitelighter. Unfortunately they belong to someone else. So does the episode Sword and the City.
Author's Note: This was a little wild hare of mine… and I just had to get it out. The episode Sword and the City originally ran in Season 6 of Charmed… one of only two episodes that season that didn't have Chris in it. I figured, there must have been some reason for it, right? Anyway, here's my altered version. The first few parts are basically transcripts from the show, but there are differences as it goes on. Promise! I hope you enjoy it.
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Okay, let's go, nothing to see here anymore, no more show, adios, scram," Phoebe says as she finishes pushing the last dwarf out of the door.
"Your majesty, seriously, if you need anything, anything at all, castles built, suits of armor. You name it, I got connections," the dwarf is saying as Phoebe pushes him out the door. Once he's out the door, Phoebe closes it and leans against it, dusting her hands off. Phoebe breathes a sigh of relief at having gotten rid of the magical creatures, but there are still problems to deal with. Namely the fact that Chris had drawn the sword, had run off, only to have Piper draw the sword from the stone as well. Phoebe moves into the living room where her sisters, brother-in-law, and the mysterious fellow that had appeared when Piper took hold of the sword wait. "Is it just me or does it still smell like ogre in here?"
Piper is gazing at the sword when Phoebe sits down. The eldest Charmed sister takes a seat, placing Excalibur on the coffee table in front of her. "I'm telling you guys, this is all just a big mistake. I mean, Chris is…" Excalibur glows slightly and slides closer to Piper. "Stop that!" Piper tells the sword.
The mysterious man says quietly, "It's drawn to you, just like you were drawn to it."
Piper glares at him, "Do I look like I'm drawn to it pal?"
"You will be in time," he responds somewhat cryptically.
"No, I don't have time to play Queen Arthur," Piper snaps. She rubs her hands against her temples, mumbling under her breath softly, "I'm gonna kill him."
Paige walks in carrying Wyatt, "Oh, come on Piper, have a little fun. Don't you realize what this means?" Paige hands Wyatt over to his father and then sits down on the arm of the sofa.
"That I'm going to kill our neurotic whitelighter and I have one more thing on my 'to do' list?" Piper asks.
"No," Paige says, "it means you my dear, are the chosen one. The first in centuries to have power over the sword." She pauses thinking about Chris, "Okay, second, but never mind that. Tell her all about it Merlin."
"Oh, actually, the name's Mordaunt. Merlin was just a fairy tale."
"Ha!" Piper says.
"But Camelot was not," Mordaunt adds.
"Ah ha!" Paige emphasizes.
"And thanks to you it can rise again," Mordaunt says to Piper.
Phoebe leans forward, looking at Mordaunt, "So what are you? A wizard? A sorcerer?"
Mordaunt answers, "Actually, I'm neither. I'm just a humble teacher in service of the sword. And we must begin instruction immediately before your enemy attacks."
"The Dark Knight," Paige states rather than asks.
"You know him?" Mordaunt asks.
"Yeah, we've already kicked his ass," Phoebe says.
"And if he shows up again we have a vanquishing potion ready and waiting," Piper says.
Mordaunt looks at the three sisters, "What's in it?"
"It's a mandrake variation with a little bit of griffin's blood," the eldest sister answers.
"Good, if you're going up against a poustuous knave which you're not. If you want to fight the Dark Knight with magic, this is what you need," Mordaunt advises, materializing a piece of parchment into his hand.
Leo looks at him suspiciously, "I thought you said you weren't a sorcerer."
"I picked up a few things along the way," the man says, handing Phoebe the parchment, "The Dark Knight is no trifle. You have to hit him with everything you have."
Phoebe wrinkles her nose, "I've never even heard of half of these ingredients."
"It looks like you picked up quite a bit," Leo directs at Mordaunt. The Elder looks at Phoebe, "What do you think?"
"Can't get a read on him," Phoebe says.
"Distrust is expected but don't let it blind you. If I haven't taught Piper how to master the sword before the Dark Knight returns, your survival depends on that potion," Mordaunt explains.
Phoebe concedes, "Okay, so where are we supposed to get the ingredients?"
"I think I know a place. Leave it to me, your trusty assistant," Paige says, taking Phoebe's hand and orbing out with her.
Leo sighs, standing up with Wyatt still in his arms, "Alright, I guess I will go check with the other Elders and see if they know anything… and see if I can find Chris, if he's not masking himself from me. You want me to take Wyatt?" Leo frowns when Piper doesn't seem to hear him for her gazing at the sword, "Piper?"
"Hmm?"
"Do you want me to take Wyatt with me?" Leo asks again.
"Yeah, sure," Piper says as Leo orbs out with Wyatt, "I'll be fine." Piper slowly stands with the sword, still looking at the gleaming weapon as if entranced.
Mordaunt summons a sword, a weapon materializing in his hand. Immediately the man attacks Piper with it, producing a scream from the brunette witch. She blocks his strike with Excalibur.
"Not bad. Better than Arthur's first time," the man states.
"Really?"
"Now, I'm going to come in low. Believe in Excalibur, just let it flow through you," he says as he begins to engage her in a sparring match with their swords.
-----------------------------------------------------------
In a cave the Dark Knight and a demon are walking past masked demons making weapons. The Dark Knight stops, "Is he your best?"
"The highest quality. They'll get the job done," the demon tells him.
"They better. If they don't, it's not me they'll have to answer to."
"I thought you were the…"
"I serve a greater power," the Dark Knight says.
The demon questions, "Whose?"
Into the cave walks a masked demon, carrying a sack over his shoulder. He clears a table, dropping the sack upon it. The sack writhes, moving until the dwarf gets out of it. "Well, should've figured you'd be after the sword," the dwarf says.
"Tell them," the masked demon growls at him.
"Kiss my grubby ass," the dwarf smarts off at him, only to have a knife pressed against his throat with another order to tell them what he knows. The dwarf smiles cockily, "You're too late. Excalibur has chosen its next heir and now Piper Halliwell has it. She's being trained how to use it."
"By who? Who's training her?" the Dark Knight asks.
The dwarf shrugs before punching the masked demon in his groin and zipping away.
"Does this change anything?" the demon asks the Dark Knight.
"It changes everything."
-----------------------------------------------------------
"I think we got everything you need. Plant roots, fungi, herbs, creature parts, insects…" Richard is saying as he leads Phoebe and Paige into a room filled with ingredients. He flips on a light so that they can see.
"Creature parts?" Phoebe asks.
"Fairy wings," Richard says.
"Wait, fairy wings?" Phoebe looks at him sharply.
"Well, I didn't kill them if that's what you're wondering," the man says defensively.
"Then how did you get them?" Phoebe counters.
"Uh, Phoebe?" Paige warns.
"Actually," Richard says calmly, "I'm not sure. My family's been stockpiling this stuff for years because of the feud."
"Yeah, but the feud's over, right?" Phoebe inquires.
"Hey, you know, I think we're gonna need a mortar and pestle for the potion. Do you have one?" Paige asks, trying to head off the direction this is going in, glaring at her sister.
"Yeah," Richard answers, leaving the room to go get it.
Paige turns to Phoebe, "What are you doing?"
"What?"
"You don't have to treat him like he's evil," Paige accuses.
"Paige, I'm just reacting to what I see. I mean, how many guys do you know that stockpile gremlin ears?"
"Okay, first your not so subtle column, and now this. Why don't you just come out and admit it," Paige says, "You hate him."
Phoebe shakes her head, "Paige, I don't hate him. I'm just worried."
"Well, don't worry because I know what I'm doing."
"Okay, so are you telling me that it doesn't bother you at all that he's using magic again? Or that he has this… this room hidden?"
"What part of 'this is not your business' aren't you getting?" Paige demands in frustration.
"Oh, Paige. I'm worried about you, okay? Just like you were worried about me when I was dating a demon."
Paige gives Phoebe a look, pointedly saying, "Richard is not a demon."
"No, I know he's not a demon, Paige, but he has a dark side and powerful magic, and that is a very dangerous combination. I… I'm worried about you, okay? I'm sorry."
Richard returns to the room, handing Paige the mortar and pestle, "Here."
"Thanks," Paige says, putting it on the table.
"Everything alright?" Richard asks, sensing the tension between the siblings.
"Let's just get this over with," Paige says.
-----------------------------------------------------------
In the Manor's attic, Piper and Mordaunt are still fighting with their swords. Dancing with the blades as if it is something they've been doing their whole lives. Piper twists her sword, disarming Mordaunt and pushes him forcefully against the wall.
"You're a quick study," Mordaunt says.
"You're a good teacher," Piper replies.
Mordaunt's lips twist upwards into a smile that borders on the sinister, "So, you feel the sword's power?"
"Yes."
"How's it feel?"
Piper pulls back from him, twisting the blade in her hands, "Not bad."
"You and Excalibur are becoming one. Soon nothing will matter. Nothing except the desire to rule," Mordaunt says.
The Dark Knight, the demon, and two masked demons shimmer into the room. The Dark Knight stares at Mordaunt and then narrows his eyes, "You."
"I was wondering when you would show up," Mordaunt says flippantly to the Dark Knight. Then to Piper, "Take him."
The Dark Knight dives forward to attack Piper. Mordaunt grabs his sword and the three other demons flow forwards to attack him.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Back at Richard's house in the ingredient room, Phoebe and Paige are busily making the potion from the list provided by Mordaunt.
"Wearboar tusk, one pinch," Paige reads off the ingredients while Phoebe drops them in the potion, "Nymph hair, one lock."
"Oh, I hope this isn't from someone we know," Phoebe says, tossing the hair into the potion.
"Wraith essence, three drops," Paige reads.
"One, two, three," Phoebe counts as she drops it in.
"And black poppy, one level teaspoon," Paige says.
"I've never even heard of black p…"
"NO!" Richard shouts, using telekinesis to slide Phoebe out the door and away from the potion before she can drop the black poppy in. Paige races over to her while Phoebe gets up.
"Phoebe, are you okay?" Paige asks in concern, "Richard?"
Richard grabs a pinch of poppy and moves back, "Wait. Watch." Richard waits a beat before throwing the poppy into the potion. It explodes violently. "Don't ever mix wraith essence with black poppy. Never."
Paige's eyes grow wide as she realizes what would have happened, "Why would Mordaunt do this?"
"Because he wants you dead," Richard says.
-----------------------------------------------------------
In the attic Piper and Mordaunt are still fighting against the Dark Knight and the three demons. Piper flows with Excalibur in the fight and vanquishes the demon and one of the two masked demons. The Dark Knight has grabbed Mordaunt.
"I thought we made a deal," the Dark Knight accuses.
"I don't need you to get to the sword anymore. I've got her," Mordaunt pushes him away. Piper twirls, vanquishing the last masked demon and then the Dark Knight as well. As they explode and turn to piles of ash, Mordaunt smiles triumphantly. "Your assimilation is complete. You are now one with Excalibur."
"Now what?" Piper asks.
Paige and Phoebe orb in and Piper turns towards them, raising the sword in preparation for another attack.
Paige holds her hands up, "It's just us."
"He's not what you think he is," Phoebe warns.
"He tried to kill us," Paige says.
"He wants the sword," Phoebe adds.
"But the sword chose me," Piper says calmly, tightening her grip on Excalibur.
Paige shakes her head, "No, honey, he's just using you. He wants the power of the sword for himself. We realize that now. And don't you remember? This morning? Chris? The sword chose him? Is that ringing any bells?"
"You're not meant to control the sword, Piper," Phoebe says.
"But I do control it," Piper says, then draws back from her sisters. Piper's eyes narrow dangerously, "And you don't think I can."
Mordaunt lays a hand on Piper's arm, "Perhaps we should leave."
"Paige, Paige," Phoebe says, "Paige."
Paige holds out her hand, "Excalibur." She tries to orb the sword to herself. It starts to leave Piper's hands and then solidifies back without leaving her grip.
Piper looks coldly at her sisters, "Don't do that again."
Mordaunt smiles, "It appears your queen has spoken."
Piper and Mordaunt vanish and Phoebe catches her lower lip in her teeth, "Her majesty has left the building."
"Or her madness," Paige says quietly.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Author's Note: I hope you guys are enjoying this so far. I know Lady Gallatea Ravenclaw, Darkmagyk, Zeria, AlphaPsiOmega, Kitty-Witty-Kate, aerohead1980, Belladona-Isabella, and angelkat2502 are enjoying it because they've all posted reviews. Thank you guys! As for the rest of you all that haven't reviewed… please, please… click that little button down there and make my day!