Chapter 4 : The One With The Clichés a.k.a. Modus Operandi I

A/N: Eh-heh, long title (I have no idea :P) I noticed that femme 'Cons and Seekers starts with a capital letter, but I like to be casual, so I'm keeping it the way I type it ;) I committed the typo on purpose! Don't panic! …(Okay, you can panic now!) Oh, and to those who don't know, 'Screamer, 'Warp, and TC is referring to Starscream, Skywarp and Thundercracker. It's been the nicknames for the three of them going around these parts, but 'Screamer was mentioned in a G1 TF episode by Thundercracker.

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One breem ago…

"I hope Starscream's okay…"

A pair of blue hands wrung each other worriedly. Thundercracker was the first to worry about Starscream whenever something happens to him. Sure, the trio had their fair share of injuries, but their aerial commander always ended up with the worst. Starscream was the only seeker who would boldly strike out first in the aerial attacks, take the wildest gamble and be the last seeker to remain flying. Thundercracker's faith in Starscream's idiosyncrasies juggled itself in his thoughts.

'And some people called him cowardly…if anyone of us had a fusion cannon aimed at our face we'd look cowardly.…okay, so he does think he's the next best thing to Primus and ends up in the worst situations 'cause he puts himself there…no wonder he begs so much…'

"Hey, TC----------"

"Wha-oh, RIGHT! ..…What?"

"Slag, you never listen to me…I swear, when you think, your optics get foggy…" Skywarp grumbled to his blue counterpart. The purple jet had his dark arms folded behind his head for support, but Thundercracker only muffled his laughter. Skywarp raised his optics to look at Thundercracker peculiarly.

"…What?"

"'Warp…y-" past a cough and a wheeze, "-don't do that…y-" and another cough, "-you look like one of those…phffft---!"

"WHAT?!"

"BIG METAL CHICKEN!!!"

"W-WHAT?! Who you callin' a chicken, eh?!" a dark purple arm wound itself around Thundercracker's neck and proceeded to noogie a dent into the unfortunate seeker's head. The two seekers struggled against each other, trying to pry one another off from a cranial attack and they both finally relented. Thundercracker pushed Skywarp away harder than was intended with a grin, and they both continued plodding down the dour halls of the Nemesis.

"Call me a chicken again and you'll face my 'Knuckle-Of-Doom'…"

"Ooh--I didn't know chicken's had knuckles-hey stopitstopitstopit!!!"

"…..(Knuckle-Of-Doom)…"

A sour blue hand rubbed an equally sour head and Thundercracker quickened his pace towards the repair bay. Skywarp checked Thundercracker's face and immediately guessed what the blue seeker was thinking.

"Eh…I wonder if 'Screamer's okay, TC."

"The sooner we get to the 'Screamer the better-"

"Oh, hi Starscrea-AAEEEEYAYIIIII!!!!!"

And back to the present…

The two jets did their best to keep up with the exasperated female seeker that was rapidly trudging back to her personal quarters. Chattering excessively on each side of her audios, Starscream was too miserable to sort out their gibberish. They both started to look like a vague resemblance to Thalia and Melpomene from the symbolic icon for drama, or more recognizable to Starscream as 'Smiley' and 'Frowny' the unremitting chatteroids. Violently punching in the code to her quarters, Starscream waited for the door to invite her into her own room, and when she could, she gladly stomped in, shut the door behind her and left the two outside like lost puppies. Thundercracker jerked back in shock but his purple friend was unfortunate enough to walk into the door.

…Silence.

The small hum from the Nemesis and the distant sound of rough housing Decepticons could be heard from above and below them. Hollow vibrations emitting from other miscellany ran through the ship. The two waited for something to happen and soon enough, the door in front of the two seekers slid open again to reveal their much changed aerial commander.

"Hsst!"

A sharp blue finger immediately snapped at Skywarp's mouth, shushing the purple seeker from clicking it open to let out another verbal onslaught. Trailing towards the blue seeker, Starscream let out a low growl from her pouted lip and narrowed her ruby optics to sharp slits, warning Thundercracker from even moving in fright. After a few earth seconds, Starscream gradually lowered her irate finger to join her balled fists and shrugged her wings in their intimidating posture.

"You don't have to run your mouths like it's a marathon gentlemen…" Starscream snarled. Switching her burning gaze from purple to blue, Thundercracker finally mustered the courage to ask her what exactly was going on.

"'Screamer…is that…you?"

"No TC, it's Starscream's twin sister…Screamerella!"

"Oh wow, and I thought Starscream was a different kinda Transformer if you know what I mean I always thought he was a little you know-eh-heh-heh-OW-WHAT-THE-SLAG TC?!!!!" Skywarp rubbed his arm in pain. Starscream let out a defeated sigh and lowered her wings, inviting them with a wave of her hand.

"Come inside, I'll tell you everything…"

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After a short and informative lecture, Starscream was left with two enlightened seekers sitting on her recharge bed, waiting for a reaction while she placed herself on a stray chair in front of them. Actually, she was just left with one seeker smarter than the other.

"So…" Skywarp repeated what he heard. "You…are…born a Deceptichick…"

Skywarp's promising reply to Starscream's explanation gave the femme con the incentive to pretend the purple jet was non-existent from that point in time, so Thundercracker gave the purple seeker his undivided attention.

"But…because you wanted to learn and stuff…you disguised as a…man seeker….aaaand….you…fought the war, kicked Autobot fenders…buuuuut…."

The femme con simply buried her head and her growing migraine into her hands, prompting the blue jet to aid Skywarp and his dilemma.

"…Starscream has always been female. She just disguised as a male." The perplexed look did not wear off Skywarp's face, and he looked to Thundercracker for a more evident answer. A flash of red appeared in front of Skywarp, and the purple jet jerked from being violently grabbed by an infuriated femme con. Starscream raised the clueless seeker to her optics and screamed at him at point blank range.

'I'M A FEMME CON! I'M A FEMME CON! I'VE ALWAYS BEEN A FEMME CON YOU STUPID SLAG! I JUST DRESSED LIKE A MALE SEEKER SO I CAN DO SLAG! BUT I AM STILL, A, FEMME, CON FOR PRIMUS SAKES!!!!"

"Okay okay, I geddit! Don't hafta scream into my audios…(touchy femmes…)" Skywarp was thrown back onto the recharge bed leaving Starscream to pace the room.

"'Screamer…"

Starscream whipped her head to look into the soft glowing optics of the empathic blue seeker. He looked genuinely concerned for her now, and Thundercracker's close friends knew it was hard for him not to be concerned for their well-being. Starscream slowly softened at his disposition, but side-glanced at Skywarp with a steely look in her optics to keep him in check.

"…I'm…glad that you told us Starscream…and I-(well I think) I understand. You know 'Warp and I are on your side, but…" the blue jet frowned, "…how are you going to tell the rest of the Decepticons?"

Starscream had the same sentiments and scowled inwardly. How she managed to reach her quarters without being spotted by any other Decepticon, accompanied by a pair of seekers chattering loudly was a coincidental miracle. With the draconic gender biased laws still instilled against femme cons, none of the Decepticons would be happy knowing that Megatron has a female con in their numbers, especially one at her rank who managed to kept her gender hidden for many vorns. After a short pause, Skywarp slapped his fist and his palm together with a suggestion.

"Maybe you can announce it over the P.A.? Or go into the canteen and just-"

"-Have the army rip her to shreds? Some of us aren't animals…just monsters! If she walks out and people start getting ideas-"

"I have an idea."

The duo turned to Starscream. "There is a meeting today in the conference room at noon. I can introduce myself there, and no one can do anything to me because Megatron would not allow it. I'm sure of that."

"And after that?"

The femme con turned to Thundercracker with her distinctive smirk.

"I am Starscream, second-in-command of the Decepticon army. I may have a new body, but my strengths and talents remain the same." She crowed and cocked her head in her own lofty manner, reassuring her worrisome friend.

"Let them try. And don't worry too much Thundercracker…I don't need a Decepticon in shining armour."

"'Screamer…?"

The two seekers drew their attention to their purple friend.

"What is it, Skywarp."

"Just wanted to let you know again that, well…"

"…You'll always be our best bud Starscream, no matter what body you choose."

The red and blue jet was more than surprised at Skywarp's out-of-character comment, which was rewarded with an equally rare smile towards the purple seeker.

"...Why, thank you Skywarp! I didn't think that you of all Transformers would say something like that but-"

"-And you're nicer to look at now. Your legs are really hot-"

Thundercracker had to hold Starscream back from feeding Skywarp her really hot legs.

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A/N: Hey, if you didn't know, there is a Screamerella fairy tale and I was referring to that too! Read it its funny!