Chapter 6: Little L
A/N: Time to see some red and gold...I only made this chapter title after writing it, and out of PURE coincidence! (See, the italics make me sound serious ;)) That I realised Jamiroquai has a song called that! Casual and random chapter, so nothing serious here :) Also, I've been correcting some typos in the last few fanfics, just to be consistent 8o Oh man, the mistakes eat into me!
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"Jazz, if ya' can't keep it, don't drive!"
"Sunstreaker, if you drove any faster, no one's gonna catch sight of your beautiful self!"
"Really?" the Lamborghini took a screeching turn to stop and face the Porsche, but the latter simply drove past him.
"Gotcha!"
"HEY!!!" a simple rev of the engines got Sunstreaker hood-to-hood with the Porsche. Sunstreaker's reputation as the vainest self-glorifying Transformer was known to anyone whose audio receptors were in range of his mouth. It didn't help that he had legs to propel his magnificent chassis from one unfortunate Autobot to the other, but as egotistical as he was, Sunstreaker was good at his job. How to convince anyone to work with him like his brother was near to impossible, but luckily for him, Jazz was one of the rare few who could stomach his immortal ego.
"Yo' man, when the big Decepticon kahuna's not up to something big, he let's out his kids in the oil fields!" Jazz reminded his impatient friend. "We're not patrolling now my yellow friend, so when you see the oil fields over th' horizon, we get sneaky, got it?"
An overdramatic sigh escaped Sunstreaker's radio, but the Porsche knew exactly what to say in reply.
"When we get em' by surprise, there's more fun for you!"
"I hope so Jazz...those flying bozos are getting boring. And I hate the way their colours reflect off my hood...the purple just clashes with my paint job."
"Oh man, I just got a call from Teletraan 1 and the Decepticreeps have gone to another one further up from the first hit!"" the Porsche exclaimed. "Time to put the pedal to the metal, Sunny boy!"
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"Blitzwing and Astrotrain can have this energon." the purple jet dipped his finger in an open cube and put said finger in his mouth. "Tastes kinda bland to me."
"Hey 'Warp, since when did you become an energon expert?" the blue jet wrinkled his nose when Skywarp started dipping the same digit into the other energon cubes. "Stop it!"
"What they don't know won't hurt 'em."
"I agree with Thundercracker. As second-in-command of the Decepticon army and the pride of the Cybertronian War Academy, I order you to cease that disgusting habit."
"No. My fingers are clean, and I washed them in my mouth before tryin' them." When the gravel beneath their feet irritated the purple seeker, he didn't stop to think twice and leaned over to scratch his foot with the same hand...and resumed his energon tasting mission with it. Starscream leaned over to the blue seeker turning green in the face and whispered a new course of action.
"...(Thundercracker, save as many energon cubes as you can from Skywarp. When we get back, take our unpolluted share to a safe place far away from this depraved seeker)."
Thundercracker nodded and transformed into his alt mode with the untainted share, gladly shooting into the blue skies. Before the other two were about to follow suit, Thundercracker spotted a dust cloud roaring in the distance, and judging by the speed they were going at, he deduced that they were Autobots. His guesses were confirmed when he spotted an Autobot insignia on the yellow Lamborghini.
"Thundercracker to Starscream, there's two Autojerks up ahead, want me to distract them?"
"No! You and 'Warp fly off without me...I can deal with those two-" she felt a tight grip on her arm and Starscream's temper flared when she saw who's hands were holding her back.
"There's no time to be showin' off 'Screamer! We have to get these back-"
"And we will!" she screeched and swiped her captive hand back, but Skywarp grabbed her wings and Thundercracker radioed in to his grounded comrades.
"C'mon 'Screamer! You don't have to prove to us you're a tough gal-!"
"I'm not proving ANYTHING you MORONS!" she swung to face Skywarp, and the purple jet had to let go or get a hearty slap from her wings. "You'll be the distraction...just hold onto the energon and don't get hit."
Starscream's team mates were left clueless as to what she had planned for the Autobots. Her concentrated silence told them that if they did not follow her orders, their efforts would be for naught, and the purple F-15 quickly joined his blue counterpart in the sky, hovering impatiently for the Autobot's to arrive.
"Seriously 'Screamer...what are you gonna do?"
She didn't know whether it would really work, but the femme con wanted her teams utmost confidence.
"Something I've always wanted to do. Now here's the plan...so listen carefully..."
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"I see 'em!"
The Lamborghini accelerated hastily towards the two hovering seekers in fear he would miss the chance for a fight, but the Autobot saboteur and his suspicions were alerted the moment he saw the duo. First of all, the seekers came in three's or six's. Secondly, their common and overused hit-and-run tactic was neglecting the part where they had to run, and for a pair of jets who could fly at Mach 2 speeds easily, they seem to be narrowly missing Sunstreaker's shots on purpose. Their erratic flight patterns infuriated the yellow Autobot aiming for their thrusters, but the optics behind the blue visors saw a mocking display of aerial acrobatics towards the Lamborghini.
No sooner had Jazz transformed into his root mode did the jets exchange their twists and turns to a straight flight course, and to catch them, the saboteur quickly transformed back to follow their enemies. Sunstreaker had already picked up the pace and raced after the two, more than goaded into kicking their afterburners, with the Porsche seen catching up with the restless Autobot in his rear-view mirror.
"Sunstreaker, you're in too deep! Bail out man! We're in an oil field!"
"From what?! I've got them right in my sights! They don't dare to shoot the ground or they'd be Autobot Fried Deceptichickens!"
"We don't hafta' join them in th' barbeque too! Let's chase 'em outta here!"
The flying duo took the cue from the Autobots and drew a circular flight path before returning back to their formation, but the cars did not buy their cheap tactic to separate them both and headed in a fairly straight line. Keeping the Lamborghini in check, Jazz felt a small relief knowing that Sunstreaker was rational enough not to go at an insane speed. One white circular structure rolled by after another, and the seekers quietly cursed the Autobot's dogged determination.
"Jazz, we've almost got 'em!"
"Don't count your tires in one garage, man! We're not out of the clearing yet! As soon as we past this-"
"LEG?!!!!!"
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"...Leg?"
"OH PRIMUS YEAH! And the suckers spun like CRAZY!!!!" Skywarp gesticulated wildly with suppressed sniggering. The Decepticon's in the canteen were gleaming with wicked smiles across their faces, and the purple jet had more to tell.
"Man! Oh man! Hey Soundwave, Rumble! You just in! Listen listen listen! So we were taking energon cubes when the Auto-dumb-boot's showed up, right?"
The purple jet continued retelling his story even if the communication officer's face of indifference did not seem impressed by the jet's gusto.
"Then, THEN! Oh, like, 'Screamer tells us to fly 'round and stuff, right? So we fly and fly-" whistling sound effect accompanied by finger twirling by yours truly, "-and they start rolling around the field, 'cause they just don't let go! Then, outta nowhere, Starscream sticks out one of her hot LEGS! (Don't tell 'Screamer I said that she'll kill me but damn she'shot!) right in front of them! OH MAN! The geeks were like, "LEG!!!" and they just swerved inta' each other and they were like FWIU FWIU FWIU FWIU FWIU! C-RASH!!!Man they hit an oil pipe an' there was oil everywhere!"
"They made a little victory oil fountain for us," Thundercracker added his comment to the blaring laughter echoing the canteen and the halls around it.
"One of them was like, "MY PAINT JOB!!!" and he kept on bitching about how he waxed today but ah, who cares, we were flying away," the din in the canteen was interrupted by the Decepticon's star guest entering the crowd. Soundwave stopped chuckling in amusement and Rumble ran to the safety of his creator's navy blue feet. The femme con standing at the door suddenly heard a roar of admiration of the Decepticon's in the room with a barrage of shouting, whistling, hollering and a few private invitations to various living quarters. Shaking her head, she gave a meaningful look at Thundercracker and the blue jet mouthed the secret location to the 'pure' energon cubes. Numerous optics were planted on her, so Starscream took a deep bow and they continued cheering, even after she left the room.
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"...Was that a..."
"...I'm not sure 'Sunny."
Sunstreaker was torn between his dirty chassis and the mysterious leg. Jazz decided to worry about the extensive damages caused by two Autobots...and the mysterious leg.
"It was a female leg...I know it."
"Three jets flew off after that man...and that was definitely Starscream...but, isn't Starscream...I mean it looked like...(Starscream's...leg)..."
"They all look the same to me..."
"Maybe they had props..."
"...I just got a new paint job..."
"Man, we have so much cleaning up t' do..."
"...MY NEW PAINT JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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"...A leg?"
Megatron raised an optic, trying his best to sort out Soundwave's words that descended from his monotonous tone to a more harmonious rhythm, retelling the events that transpired this afternoon, word for word. The Decepticon eased into his chair and rubbed his chin, playing with his thoughts.
"Interesting..." he smiled.
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A/N: YAY, AUTOBOTS! Writing the first few chapters of this fanfic has made me seen purple and blue, and I realised, I do need to write about the Autobots, a little ahead of 'schedule' but it was worth it. I do love them, believe you me! Um...corny KFC reference by Sunstreaker, but hey! They were in the 80's!