Chapter 19: 23 and a Half Energon Cubes…
A/N: Accidentally wrote three chapters in two days 'cause I got caught in the moment! 8P But I'm gonna post them later 'cause I have to check for mistakes and such, so if the writing seems casual, bad or just childish (having done it in such a short time), please bear with me, I'll correct them XP There's more of Starscream's POV in here, because, it IS her story :)
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Recap.
Twenty-three and a half cubes of high grade energon ago, I, Starscream, walked into this bar, which is very-much loved by the seeker amongst us called Skywarp. Thundercracker knows what to do and asks for our usual drinks. It has been too long for me since I've heard those words, and I can feel a small smile creep to my lips. Barflies shift their optics to look at me, taking a little longer to revert their stares back to their drinks and/or their companions. Having a female Decepticon show herself around this time of the 'night' (the darkest hour I must add; we don't have that 'largest' star in the sky, or what those digit-sized apes call the sun. Starscream to Earth, the sun ISN'T the biggest star. I've seen bigger. And our moons are just as bright sometimes).
Where are the Decepticon females? At home of course, waiting for the men to return, and not wondering the streets, looking for strangers to outrage their modesty. Yes, any other female Transformer can walk outside except us, because were…well, were property. Tch. Makes you wonder why I put on a male disguise for a few million vorns, does it? Which brings me to the next fact: there are a few types of femme cons that come out at this time of the night, mostly work related. An equally rare but dangerously alluring bounty hunter might be looking for a job. You can tell when you see a femme con literally decorated with artillery, sporting less fashionable, less effeminate colours. They contrast the younger generation of naive giggly sparkling females, who's idea of danger and mystery involves breaking curfew (Wow, CAN you smell the danger? Whoop-tee-doo).
Other nocturnal Decepticon femmes of the work-related field serve in bars like this, mostly inhabited with male Transformers. So it is safe to say, femmes who work at these hours cater to the our parasitic overpopulated male counterparts on Cybertron. Better be working with them then on them I suppose. Eyuckh.
Oh, my…what the-?!
"Slag TC! D'ya see that d'ya see that?! THREE, femme cons-! Three-" Skywarp looked back and forth from the females and Starscream. "See! SEE! When one comes out, the others follow! 'S like some mystical femme callin' or somethin'-!"
Can Skywarp clamp his vocals unit shut! And who are 'Charlie's Angels'?! That retardacon must be referring to some obscure human television show. Oh no oh no, they're coming towards me, TC get them away from me-!
Too late.
"On my Primus, its Starscream! We're your BIGGEST FANS!!!" the two pink, white and teal females squealed in unison, jumbling their limbs together in delight. The darker, more level-headed femme con behind them rolled her head in sarcasm and shoved the other two females aside to meet Starscream.
"Starscream, it's a pleasure to meet you…" the voice of a rational mind from the darker femme charmed Starscream's audios.
Pleasures all mine. And Thundercracker's too. I think Skywarp's rolling his tongue back in, can't see past all those pink and white and teal and white and pink white teal…Primus, what happened to decent paint jobs! Other than this one on front of me, even the blind would agree with me that those two femmes are too bright!
"Many of us have been keeping up with the news from Earth, but when we heard about you …On behalf of the femme cons, you're an inspiration to us all, Miss Starscream!"
"Please, call me Starscream," the aerial commander pushed her confident grin wider and received the femmes outstretched palm.
I shake hands with her, she takes out a data pad, I sign it, receive two more, sign them, and talk about my exploits if they've missed anything (they shouldn't have)-oh.
…I've got an idea to keep those bimbocons busy.
"Have you met my wing mates? This is Thundercracker-" Starscream pointed to said seeker, taking a coy glance behind is energon drink, "-and Skywarp." Adorning each arm, the two brightly-coloured femmes were tickling the purple jet's chin, and the trio erupted into a spastic fit of giggles.
"Hee hee…don't! I'm ticklish! C'mon ladies, let 'Warp buy you a high grade drink-!"
Ah, energon. The cheapest date rape drug known to all Transformers. Underestimated and overused by both genders alike. Here's a simple equation: Skywarp plus naïve(femme cons) divided by HGEnergon, times mental black hole and giggling stupidity, infinity squared. Find 'x'.
And the answer is: x equals intelligence. There is no x
Twenty-three and a half cubes of high grade energon later though…
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"Why don't you take a picture, it lasts longer, you slaggin'…pwluh." Starscream shook a weak fist at the lecherous table eyeballing her in the corner. 'How dare it say such, such-!'
Thundercracker had no sound advice to offer Starscream to deter the depraved metal upholstery from upsetting her modesty, choosing to sob and gurgle in his energon cube. "I don't get it 'Screamer…why can't my creators just accept me the way I am? I'm a Decepticon, but…but I'm still their Thunder, y'know? …Y'know?" The blue seeker dunked his heavy head in the cube, splashing some droplets on the dark femme failing to consoling him.
With two armfuls of Decepticon females, Skywarp's day couldn't have been any better. Giggling to her own voice, one pink and white femme con was busy whispering some form of adult debauchery to the purple jet's audio, and they both succumbed to immature sniggers. The other femme was carelessly burning her personal contact number in a large font on his wing with her hand laser. Starscream thought it was best to cart themselves back to her home, and stood up to announce her decision.
"…Okay, I am quite sober now. C'mon guys, let's go home."
"HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOME!!!!!!" Skywarp hollered.
'Giggle, snigger, giggly snig,' says the purple drunkard. Oh no, he's gonna start, isn't he-?
"I know a song that gets on ev'rybody's nerves! I know a song that gets on ev'rybody's nerves! I know a song that gets on ev'rybody's nerves and it sounds, just like thiiiiiiiis!" Skywarp clapped his hands to the song. "C'mon everybody, all together now! I know a song that gets on ev'rybody's nerves-!"
Holy slag, now those two chattercons have started. "C'mon 'Warp, help me carry 'Boo-Hoo' over here!" The red seeker shrugged her blue wing mate's arm over her shoulders in time, to catch a breath of energon and misery from his vocaliser.
"An-! I sent then a letter but they didn't-!"
Oh Primus, Thunder' just snorted on his own nasal fluids.
"I KNOW A SONG THAT GETS ON EV'RYBODY'S NERVES-!"
Oh my Primus, Megatron. Why did I ask them to follow me, why, WHY?! No matter. When I rest their stupid afts home, I can get on with my mission…
Ah, I see you've sent Laserbeak to spy on me…how trusting. Buzzsaw must be somewhere near by too…And Jazz is following it, hello lover. Oh! Very observant Laserbeak, the Autobots are chucking scrap iron at you! Now you have better things to look at! Ah, home sweet home.
…Now I can drop by my creator's hollowed out junk cave for a visit…I haven't see him in ages…
…I don't miss him…
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A/N: ARGH! Go see him already! Argh! Argh! Yargh! Why am I delaying it?!!!! XPPP