A rogue chapter appears! With long-anticipated naughtiness to boot!

Thanks to Olndina for helping me with this chapter!

"What do you think our chances are of finding him?" Nathaniel asked.

Gideon was seated at his desk, poring over a map of the arling. The Blackmarsh was just a tiny dot on this oversized map, but it was the best resource they had. As far as Nathaniel knew, no detailed map of that area existed. It had been many, many years since anyone had lived there. "It's hard to say," Gideon said. "I think we've a good chance of at least finding traces of him if we search the area,but I'm not so sure about our chances of finding him alive."

Nathaniel nodded. It had been several months since Kristoff had reportedly left Vigil's Keep, and apart from his brief stay at the Crown and Lion in the city, there had been no reports of him since. "At least as a seasoned Warden he would be able to sense any darkspawn nearby and keep clear of them."

"Darkspawn can sense us, too," Gideon said grimly. "Though I don't know how well. And one Warden against a dozen genlocks wouldn't stand much of a chance."

Nathaniel frowned. "You speak as if he's already dead."

"Just being realistic, Nathaniel. The way our luck's been going, I'm not holding my breath for a happy ending. For any of this."

It was a surprising admission to hear from Gideon. He certainly wasn't the most optimistic person, but this was the first time he'd ever admitted the possibility of defeat. It worried Nathaniel. Gideon was the one keeping them all together.

Gideon rubbed at his eyes wearily. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't be so defeatist." He straightened his shoulders, seeming to rally himself. "We need to end this, at any cost." He smirked. "I ended a whole Blight with just one other Warden to help me—a little invasion like this one should be a snap after that."

The two of them hadn't really spoken about Loghain; when Nathaniel had tried to broach the subject, Gideon had shrugged him off, making it clear that that particular topic was not to be discussed. Nathaniel suspected that Gideon's grim demeanor had less to do with lack of sleep, and more to do with the former teyrn's unexpected visit.

Nathaniel nodded. "We're all behind you, you know. Every one of us would fight with you to the bitter end, if need be."

Gideon's brow went up. "Even you?"

"Without hesitation," Nathaniel said sincerely, knowing now that it was true. The time for doubt was past—Gideon's brief display of it was proof. If Gideon could be strong for his Wardens, than Nathaniel could surely return the favor. Nathaniel had had his chance to walk away if he'd really wanted to; he didn't think Gideon would have actually tried to stop him. He hadn't taken that chance, and he knew that he never would. He was needed here. Not just by Gideon, but by every innocent person in danger of being harmed by the darkspawn. He would fight for those who couldn't.

"I'm not too sure about Velanna yet," Gideon said, looking over the map again. "I have a feeling she'll only be loyal for as long as it takes to find her sister."

Nathaniel shrugged. "She may surprise you. She's a good fighter, and strong-willed. She just needs to know we're not the enemy."

"You seem to be doing a good job on that front," Gideon said, alluding to Nathaniel's attempts at befriending Velanna. "I'm sure we can get her to trust us with time, but a Warden has to be able to choose the Order over family. As cold as it seems, duty comes before everything else."

Nathaniel understood that, though it pained him a little. He couldn't help but wonder what he would do if he were in her situation. Velanna had lost her sister, never to be recovered no matter how hard she searched. It was clear that she loved Seranni deeply—she had even told Nathaniel a few stories about when they were children—but Seranni had the Taint; even if they succeeded in finding her, she would not survive for long. And she had clearly allied herself with the Architect, Maker only knew why.

"Gaining trust works both ways, as well," Gideon added. "I trust her to fight alongside me, but not enough to have my back yet. I think I'll leave her behind at the keep when we set out for the Blackmarsh. If this place is as dangerous as you seem to think, I'd rather focus on the danger in front of me without having to worry about possible danger behind me as well."

As Gideon continued examining the map—occasionally making notes on it—Nathaniel allowed his thoughts to drift a little, towards a certain man whose lips he could still feel against his own, even though it had been hours since they'd last kissed. His closed his eyes, taking a slow breath as if he could somehow inhale the memory of Anders' exotic scent. Only a moment of fancy was allowed before he returned to the present, eyes opening as he answered another one of Gideon's questions about the lands surrounding the Blackmarsh. Idle fantasies didn't need to be indulged when he knew he would see Anders tonight.

Dinnertime drew close and Nathaniel excused himself to clean up. He took extra care with his ablutions, washing off the dirt and sweat of the morning's exercise using the basin in his room. He carefully rebraided his hair and trimmed his beard; not usually a vain man, Nathaniel wanted to look his best for Anders. Once he was clean, he changed into some fresh breeches and a tunic of dark blue. He was feeling a sense of nervous anticipation—after hours of near-impatience, only a short meal stood between himself and Anders being alone together in a bedroom.

Anders was already eating by the time Nathaniel entered the hall, his skin as pink and scrubbed as Nathaniel's own. Nathaniel noticed that Anders was wearing different robes as well—the emerald green ones that he'd acquired in Amaranthine a few months ago. The leather thong that held Anders' hair back was of the same color, perfectly complementing his honey-blond hair.

Nathaniel wasn't sure where to seat himself. Would it be presumptuous of him to sit beside Anders? Would it be considered a slight if he chose not to? Sigrun solved the problem as she waved him to sit beside her, across from Anders. Anders looked up from his soup as Nathaniel sat down. His eyes lit up and he smiled at Nathaniel, winking at him slyly before returning to his food.

Nathaniel hardly even noticed what he was eating; he was too focused on Anders. Halfway through the meal, he felt a very distinct pressure against the side of his leg. The wicked smile on Anders' face was enough to make Nathaniel realize that Anders was running his foot along Nathaniel's leg. He tilted his head down, trying to hide the smile that curved his lips. Anders' foot moved away before Nathaniel had a chance to decide whether or not to reciprocate. He looked up to see Anders pushing away from the table and standing up, the plate in front of him scraped clean.

Anders did an exaggerated cat-like stretch, arms raised above his head and back arching. Nathaniel suspected this display was meant for him. "Much as I hate to rob all of you of my presence, I've got a long night of potion-making ahead of me."

Gideon let out a chuckle. "That's what happens when you spend the entire day abed rather than being productive."

Anders laughed. "You and I have different ideas of what's 'productive.' No point in wasting the day working when you can spend it snuggled down in a nice, soft bed."

Gideon shook his head, a smile of amusement still lingering. "So long as you don't get into the habit of it; it'll be a long time yet before any of us can afford to be lazy for more than a few hours."

"Then I'd best make the most of your generosity." Anders gave an exaggerated bow to the entire table, his eyes catching Nathaniel's for a brief moment, before taking his leave. It wouldn't do for Nathaniel to draw attention by excusing himself right after Anders left, so he took his time finishing his meal. It was hard, but he wanted to keep things with Anders discreet, at least for now. They needed the time and privacy to explore things between them before the inevitable playful jeers and salacious comments would commence. This night was for himself and Anders, and as far as he was concerned, it was no one else's business.

When sufficient time had passed, he placed his napkin on his empty plate and scooted his chair out. He bade a quiet good night to everyone with slightly less aplomb than Anders had.

As most everyone was still at dinner, the hallway was deserted; Nathaniel headed for the stairway, half-fearful that Anders would not be waiting in Nathaniel's bedroom as promised. He had barely stepped onto the first landing when he felt hands reaching for him. Caught in a rare moment where his guard was down, he was pushed back against the wall. He was about to fight back when he felt warm lips pressed upon his. Instinctively, he clutched Anders' robes in both hands and pulled him in close. His tongue flicks against Anders' lower lip, seeking access into Anders' warm mouth.

They kissed for what felt like eternity but was likely only a few moments, before Nathaniel drew away from Anders' lips. He couldn't help the low chuckle that rumbled in his throat. "This isn't the most opportune place for kissing; someone might catch us."

"Don't care," Anders said, trying to lean in for another kiss. Nathaniel stopped him, somewhat reluctantly. The dinner hour was nearly over, and at any moment someone could be climbing the stairs towards their bedchambers.

He grasped Anders' hand. "Let's go somewhere more private."

Anders let out a huff of breath. "If you insist…" But he was smiling impishly and he squeezed Nathaniel's hand back as he allowed Nathaniel to lead him up the stairs. Anders walked casually into Nathaniel's room, as if he had been there a hundred times before. Nathaniel followed behind, anticipation thrumming through every part of his body.

The door snicked closed behind him, echoing loudly in the sudden silence. Now that they were finally here—alone together in Nathaniel's room—Nathaniel found that his patience was at an end. He didn't want to waste another second without Anders in his arms.

He grasped Anders' hand, tugging him close so that he could wrap his arms around Anders' waist. "I've thought about you all day."

Anders smiled at him. "You better have been. I'd be sorely put out if I was the only one looking forward to tonight."

"Definitely not," Nathaniel assured him. "I've waited for… well, for years, for tonight to happen. Though I didn't realize it." He cupped Anders' cheek, stroking it gently. "I've told you my secrets and you didn't flee—that means more to me than I can say."

Anders smiled. "I haven't found a reason to run from you yet." He leaned in and kissed Nathaniel softly. "And I'm glad neither of us has to wait any longer."

Nathaniel's arms tightened around Anders, pulling the mage flush against his chest as he kissed him back. Anders responded eagerly, melting into Nathaniel's embrace. There was no more need for words as Nathaniel slowly walked backwards, pulling Anders towards the bed. Just as they got to the edge, and Nathaniel was about to push Anders onto the mattress, Anders placed a hand on Nathaniel's chest, stopping him for a moment. "Tell me you want this" he said. "I want you to be sure."

Nathaniel smiled at Anders reassuringly. "I want this. I'm not going to run from you this time, I promise." He could understand Anders' wariness, and knew that the best way to prove himself was through action. He moved forward again, gently laying Anders down on the bed before sliding on top of him. They lay stretched out, kissing each other lazily, until eventually the kisses became more urgent and impatient.

There was a bit of awkwardness as they tried to undress each other while still embracing and kissing at the same time, but eventually they were both nude, their arms wrapped tight around each other. Nathaniel was still stretched out on top of Anders and he shifted a little so that their lengths rubbed together. Anders moaned lowly in appreciation of the gesture, his hips thrusting against Nathaniel's to increase the friction.

Nathaniel ground down against Anders, kissing and biting at his lips. His hand wandered over Anders' thigh, nails scraping his skin gently, causing Anders to hiss with pleasure. Their earlier activities in the bath had emboldened Nathaniel, and he felt much more comfortable exploring Anders' body with his hands and mouth. He kissed along Anders' jaw, and then his neck, teeth gently nipping at his earlobe along the way. Every breathless gasp from Anders was music to Nathaniel's ears, and he vowed to pull as many delicious noises from Anders as possible.

Part of him could not believe that he was really here–lying with Anders, being intimate with a man he had wanted for months, but denied himself. For so many years he had blocked out his desires, resigning himself not only to a life of celibacy, but a life devoid of love or even romantic feelings. Yet here he was with Anders, and now that he had committed himself to this, it felt so completely natural and right, that he could not imagine being anywhere else.

He kissed Anders' shoulder, hands still wandering freely. "Do you have oil?" he asked. He saw Anders nod out of the corner of his eye.

"In my robes." Nathaniel nodded his head and strained to reach the robes Anders had cast aside onto the floor only moments earlier. They were still warm from Anders' body, causing another wave of anticipation to shiver through his body. His nimble fingers found the vial of oil in a pocket and grasped it. He turned his attention back to his lover. Anders was propped up on his elbows, a serious look on his face."You're sure about this? We can wait, you know. We don't have to—"

"I'm sure," Nathaniel growled. "How many times do I have to tell you?"

Anders looked a little sheepish. "Sorry. I just don't think I could take it if you ran away again."

"I won't," Nathaniel reassured him, stroking his arm.

"You'll tell me if it's too much?" Anders asked.

Nathanielrolled his eyes, his grasp on Anders' arm became firmer, and he ground his hips down onto Anders once more. "I am no virgin, Anders. I may not have much experience," he refrained from saying I may not have as much experience as you do, "but I know what I'm doing."

Anders raised an eyebrow, grinning playfully. "Oh, really? Prove it."

Nathaniel chuckled. He had never been able to resist a challenge, especially not one with such a satisfying reward.

Nathaniel pulled the cork out of the bottle, releasing a faint woodsy scent that wafted through the air. His confidence in himself was quickly returning, and it was with a steady hand that he tipped the bottle and drizzled some of its contents onto his fingers. He stoppered the bottle and set it aside on the bed within reach for later use. He glanced at Anders to find the other man looking up at him intently, a smile on his face and a soft look in his eyes. Nathaniel smiled back as he reached down between Anders' legs.

Crooking his legs and planting his feet on the mattress, Anders made the process easier for Nathaniel as the rogue ran a slicked finger over Anders' puckered entrance, tracing the tight ring of muscle surrounding the opening. A soft sigh of pleasure drifted from Anders' lips and Nathaniel slowly teased at Anders', content with watching as the muscle expanded and contracted. When Anders made a slight sound of impatience, Nathaniel acquiesced and pressed his finger inside.

"Maker, yes," Anders moaned, his eyes slipping closed. Nathaniel wriggled his finger in deeper, crooking it slightly. When his finger brushed up against a soft mound of tissue Anders cried out. Nathaniel smirked, knowing he had found Anders' sweet spot. He rubbed his finger over it in a rhythmic motion, causing Anders to gasp. "Nate, please… " Anders begged.

Nathaniel just smiled at him. "Not yet." He drew his finger back far enough so that he could slip a second one inside. He thrust his fingers in and out of Anders' arse, brushing against that sensitive spot over and over.

Anders was nearly in a frenzy now, gripping Nathaniel's biceps and arching his back up. "If you don't take me right now—" Anders growled in warning, though the breathiness of his voice belied his arousal, as did his fully erect cock.

Finally relenting, Nathaniel drew his fingers out and reached for the oil. He poured more of it into the palm of his hand and smeared it over his own stiffened length. He grasped the back of Anders' thighs, pulling them up slightly as he knelt between Anders' legs.

One last tender glance down at Anders and then Nathaniel was pushing inside. He could not bite back a loud moan of pleasure as he felt Anders clench around him. Maker, he had forgotten how good this felt, to have this tight heat completely surrounding his cock, muscles clenching around him, a warm body beneath him. He pushed in slowly, with short, shallow thrusts, until he was completely sheathed inside Anders. He paused then, taking several moments to catch his breath and collect himself. It had been so long, and just being inside Anders felt so good that he was worried if he tried to move at all he would come instantly. He did not want his first time with Anders to be a complete disaster.

Finally, when he felt he had gotten himself under control, he started to move. His thrusts were slow and tentative at first, but Anders' moans of pleasure spurred him on. Soon he was thrusting in deeper, faster, and his quiet groans were nearly as frequent as Anders'.

Anders' soft sounds were interspersed with a litany of words of encouragement, telling Nathaniel how good he felt, how amazing he was. With the words harder, faster, and deeperleaving the mage's mouth as fast as any spells he threw in battle, Nathaniel complied as best he could, thrusting in as hard as he could. He leaned forward a little, changing the angle of his thrusts so that he hit up against Anders' sweet spot.

"Andraste's fucking arse!" Anders cried out, hips bucking up against Nathaniel. "Oh, Nate, oh Maker, that's so good!"

Nathaniel loved the fact that Anders was being so noisy and talkative, rather than his usual wish for silence from the mage; encouragement that he was actually satisfying Anders was much-needed.

For himself… Maker, it had been so long that it felt like a faded memory, but he could not recall it ever feeling this good. He found a comfortable rhythm: fast, with each thrust pushing deep. It had been too long–he had wanted this for too long – that he knew he could not last much longer. One hand still gripping the back of one of Anders' thighs, he reached down and wrapped the other hand around Anders' length. Anders dug his nails deep into Nathaniel's biceps, hips coming up to meet each of Nathaniel's thrusts and to encourage the attention to his cock.

Nathaniel's thrusts became rougher and faster as the pleasure built up inside him, threatening to overflow. He stroked Anders fast, hand tight around his length until Anders came with a piercing shout of Nathaniel's name. When Nathaniel felt Anders' hot seed spurt over his fingers he lost it. With one last series of hard thrusts he came hard, buried to the hilt inside of Anders.

Panting, trying to catch his breath, Nathaniel practically collapsed on top of Anders. The hands that had been clenching his upper arms so tightly loosened, and he felt arms wrapping around his torso.

Anders turned his head to nuzzle at Nathaniel's cheek. "That was… bloody fantastic"

Nathaniel smiled at Anders before leaning in to kiss him deeply. "I'd have to agree with you on that," he said softly as he drew back. He slowly rolled over onto his side and pulled Anders into his arms.

Anders snuggled in close and rested his head against Nathaniel's chest. "I've dreamed about this so many times–literally dreamed about it–but they didn't even come close compared to the real thing." He smiled up at Nathaniel crookedly. "It was definitely worth the wait."

Nathaniel smiled wryly. "I'm glad you think so. For me . . . I should have done this a long time ago."

Anders laughed. "Well, we'll just have to make up for lost time, won't we?" His arms wrapped around Nathaniel's waist, purring contentedly as Nathaniel stroked his back..

"I would like that very much," Nathaniel said with all sincerity. "Now that I've had a taste of you, I don't intend to waste any more time."

Anders seemed to hesitate for a moment, biting at his lip. "I could . . . move in here. Only if you wanted," he added hastily. "We don't have to. I just thought that . . . it would make things easier. Instead of us having to creep back and forth into each other's rooms in the dark of night." He flashed Nathaniel a tentative smile.

Nathaniel was both extremely pleased and very touched by Anders' offer. "That would make the most sense," he said neutrally, careful not to sound too eager. He did not want to read more into this than Anders might want. Rooming together would be more of a convenience, though they would definitely face a bit of teasing from the other Wardens for a bit. He found that he did not actually mind all that much, surprisingly enough. But he was sensible enough to realize that this was not any real declaration of commitment for Anders. While this was not just about sex for him, Nathaniel knew, he also knew he had to tread carefully and not push too far, too fast.

"You do realize that Sigrun is going to tease us about this endlessly, right?" He smiled and kissed Anders' brow to indicate that he was not overly bothered by that fact.

Anders laughed. "Seeing as how she's been telling me for months that we need to 'just do it already,' I think she'll be fine with it."

Nathaniel's face flushed. "She said that?"

"She meant well, believe me." Anders brushed his nose against Nathaniel's. "She likes you–well, she said you're not that bad, considering you're a noble. Which I'd think is probably a pretty high compliment from a casteless dwarf."

Nathaniel nodded. "I'm sure it is." He looked at Anders hesitantly. "What did you say in regards to her suggestion?"

"I told her you were too much of a gentleman to have an idle fling, but that if you ever made an advance on me I'd jump you in a heartbeat."

"Anders!" Nathaniel tried to be angry about Anders' lewd confessions to Sigrun, but found that he couldn't. He smiled wryly instead, shaking his head in disbelief. "You really are something else."

Anders looked proud of the comment. "I do try to be unique."

"Oh, you certainly are. I doubt there's anyone else out there like you in all of Thedas." He rubbed Anders' back. "For which I am very glad."

Anders snuggled up against Nathaniel, yawning softly. "Mmm . . . glad you think so."

Nathaniel kissed the top of Anders' head. "You'll stay here tonight?" he asked, already feeling sleepy.

"Of course I will." Anders yawned again. "Too comfy to move now. You're much warmer than the pillows in my bedroom."

Nathaniel smiled as his eyes slowly shut. He was still trying to think of a witty response to Anders' comment when he drifted off to sleep.